It's in his kiss

[differenceblog]

As discussed in April, ( "The effects of kissing") men and women may respond differently to the act of osculation. Recent research suggests that they may also have different reasons for initiating a kiss. Hughes et al (2007)(PDF) found that women were more likely than men to use kissing as a means of monitoring their relationship. For men, the

Comments

[plumtreeblossom]

It's hard to believe now, but I've actually consented to sex with men who refused to kiss me (because they didn't feel romantic about me, just wanted a fuck). I'm repulsed to think about it now, and I'll never do that again.

[differenceblog]

Nods. I did that too, although I think it was just the once. I wasn't repulsed about it until

(a) I found out he'd bragged about it.
(b) I found out how other people would react to it.

If I felt like it was something I could brag about, too, that would have been fine (I think), but it was presented to me as something to be ashamed of, and as a result, I was shamed by it.

[plumtreeblossom]

I did it more often I even want to think about. I was grabbing for crumbs, and making the naive assumption that if a man fucked me, it meant he liked me. As recently as 3 years ago, I spent several months as the fuck-thing of someone I was in unrequited love with. Of all the dozens of times I had sex with him, he never once kissed me or let me kiss him.

I feel ashamed of myself for letting that happen to me.

[thedeli]

"Get on with the show", eh?

That's a charming line - I'll have to remember that one!

[differenceblog]

charming. heh. I guess that's one way of describing it. I couldn't think of a less offensive one offhand, though.