30 Day Prompt Challenge: Day 25. Lighting
Pairing: Yunho/Junsu
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, mindfuck galore
Drabble: 788 words
Summary: Junsu takes recluse in a closet.
25. Lighting
The closet is his best friend because he can’t hear the outside world from inside it. The scary shadow monsters can’t claw at his legs and ask for entrance into his mind. This silence can’t hurt him. He’s safe, he’s alone. At least Junsu tells himself that, but the darkness and loneliness is actually suffocating and he panics through every single second. The screaming voices, the offbeat melodies, the dying notes -they wanted to grow inside his head and take over.
If he wrapped shirts around his head and buried his face into a pile of dirty laundry, the voices almost disappeared, or at best they remained muffled. Trapped in the shadows, nothing in his heart could stir. He is alone, he is safe. Sometimes the soft sound of ruffling fabric spooked him, and Junsu had to take shallow breaths to overcome this new fear. The bruises his fingers left on his arms were meaningless, but they told him he was alive. Just don’t move, don’t make a sound, and don’t pretend.
That might be Jaejoong, or possibly Yoochun, because he’s hiding in their room and they wear each other’s skin depending on how they feel that day. Junsu feels scared all the time. Shh, he tells himself, don’t let them hear you. Ignore them and they will disappear. They aren’t really there. It freaks him the fuck out when Jaejoong opens the door and moves some hangers around, Yoochun draped over his shoulder and sucking the sweat off his skin. They’re both naked, but Junsu knows they didn’t do anything in their room. He knows, he would have heard. But he didn’t. Because he was alone, he was safe.
Neither noticed him on the floor. Of course they couldn’t, only toes are visible, and even then they are barely getting air under a pair of Jaejoong’s boots. Once Jaejoong has grabbed all the clothes he and Yoochun need, they leave, slamming the closet door shut and keeping their private room private. Junsu relaxes again because now he’s safe and alone. Good, because he wasn’t sure how much longer he could have held his breath and counted the dust particles floating in his line of vision, a sweater.
The ache in his limbs tells him he’s been missing for at least half the day, and if someone doesn’t start looking for him soon, he’ll be really depressed. He knows they’re just trying to be considerate about his personal space, not wanting to seem overbearing, but he kind of needs that right now. If the pressure in his heart didn’t kill him, their lack of presence would. He’s sure those two soulmates will feel like shit once he’s found, but it only shows how lacking he really is. God damn, who turned on the hallway light? It must be nighttime now. It’s not so safe anymore, but he’s still alone.
Sometimes he wonders how his bladder can take it. Sure, he hadn’t drunk much up until his little escape from reality, but surely he had to go at some point? Wrong, his body felt nothing but the numbness in his limbs. He stopped trying to move, stopped trying to feel, stopped trying to do things they were supposed to do. All he had left was his heart pumping blood and his lungs breathing, if even that. His brain needs to stop being a douche, because he can hear everything that fucker says. Hey, there’s a bug, now he’s not alone either. Not alone, not safe.
Now he’s tired of this and all he wants is to wake up from this dream. He’s not asleep, he never sleeps, but it’s a wish. What’s that pounding? It’s his soul banging around, trying to get out of this prison. There is no light, it’s so dark, it’s cold, but these clothes are so warm. The door opened again, his heart started going crazy, he might die. Junsu knows it’s not Jaejoong or Yoochun; there’d be a gayness to the steps that none of the other members could imitate. This person is determined, Junsu noted when they went around the room making more ruckus than a clumsy burglar.
When the light first hits his face, Junsu is ready to hiss. At least the soulmates had been considerate enough to leave the light off. This asshole digs through his barrier of last season's outfits and finds his muscled leg, pulling it hard. Junsu falls onto the ground and makes no attempt to hide anymore. Oh look, it’s Yunho.
“God, Junsu, I was looking for you everywhere! I need you, come on!” Junsu’s eyes adjust to the light, he pulls down his shorts to their proper length, and follows Yunho into the real world.
Day 24. || Day 26.
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, mindfuck galore
Drabble: 788 words
Summary: Junsu takes recluse in a closet.
25. Lighting
The closet is his best friend because he can’t hear the outside world from inside it. The scary shadow monsters can’t claw at his legs and ask for entrance into his mind. This silence can’t hurt him. He’s safe, he’s alone. At least Junsu tells himself that, but the darkness and loneliness is actually suffocating and he panics through every single second. The screaming voices, the offbeat melodies, the dying notes -they wanted to grow inside his head and take over.
If he wrapped shirts around his head and buried his face into a pile of dirty laundry, the voices almost disappeared, or at best they remained muffled. Trapped in the shadows, nothing in his heart could stir. He is alone, he is safe. Sometimes the soft sound of ruffling fabric spooked him, and Junsu had to take shallow breaths to overcome this new fear. The bruises his fingers left on his arms were meaningless, but they told him he was alive. Just don’t move, don’t make a sound, and don’t pretend.
That might be Jaejoong, or possibly Yoochun, because he’s hiding in their room and they wear each other’s skin depending on how they feel that day. Junsu feels scared all the time. Shh, he tells himself, don’t let them hear you. Ignore them and they will disappear. They aren’t really there. It freaks him the fuck out when Jaejoong opens the door and moves some hangers around, Yoochun draped over his shoulder and sucking the sweat off his skin. They’re both naked, but Junsu knows they didn’t do anything in their room. He knows, he would have heard. But he didn’t. Because he was alone, he was safe.
Neither noticed him on the floor. Of course they couldn’t, only toes are visible, and even then they are barely getting air under a pair of Jaejoong’s boots. Once Jaejoong has grabbed all the clothes he and Yoochun need, they leave, slamming the closet door shut and keeping their private room private. Junsu relaxes again because now he’s safe and alone. Good, because he wasn’t sure how much longer he could have held his breath and counted the dust particles floating in his line of vision, a sweater.
The ache in his limbs tells him he’s been missing for at least half the day, and if someone doesn’t start looking for him soon, he’ll be really depressed. He knows they’re just trying to be considerate about his personal space, not wanting to seem overbearing, but he kind of needs that right now. If the pressure in his heart didn’t kill him, their lack of presence would. He’s sure those two soulmates will feel like shit once he’s found, but it only shows how lacking he really is. God damn, who turned on the hallway light? It must be nighttime now. It’s not so safe anymore, but he’s still alone.
Sometimes he wonders how his bladder can take it. Sure, he hadn’t drunk much up until his little escape from reality, but surely he had to go at some point? Wrong, his body felt nothing but the numbness in his limbs. He stopped trying to move, stopped trying to feel, stopped trying to do things they were supposed to do. All he had left was his heart pumping blood and his lungs breathing, if even that. His brain needs to stop being a douche, because he can hear everything that fucker says. Hey, there’s a bug, now he’s not alone either. Not alone, not safe.
Now he’s tired of this and all he wants is to wake up from this dream. He’s not asleep, he never sleeps, but it’s a wish. What’s that pounding? It’s his soul banging around, trying to get out of this prison. There is no light, it’s so dark, it’s cold, but these clothes are so warm. The door opened again, his heart started going crazy, he might die. Junsu knows it’s not Jaejoong or Yoochun; there’d be a gayness to the steps that none of the other members could imitate. This person is determined, Junsu noted when they went around the room making more ruckus than a clumsy burglar.
When the light first hits his face, Junsu is ready to hiss. At least the soulmates had been considerate enough to leave the light off. This asshole digs through his barrier of last season's outfits and finds his muscled leg, pulling it hard. Junsu falls onto the ground and makes no attempt to hide anymore. Oh look, it’s Yunho.
“God, Junsu, I was looking for you everywhere! I need you, come on!” Junsu’s eyes adjust to the light, he pulls down his shorts to their proper length, and follows Yunho into the real world.
Day 24. || Day 26.