Submission

[devifemme]

Longtime readers will possibly recall my fascination with girls in slave relationships. I have 7-8 good friends on LJ, mostly with male masters. Despite being strictly a girl's girl, these submissives intrigue me -- though I'd NEVER consider intimately serving a man

Comments

[ready2please]

In my opinion, AFTERCARE is the most important part of submission. At least for me.

In fact, I would say that any Dominant that doesn't take care of their sub after a scene is irresponsible and doesn't deserve to have anyone submit to them.

Again, just my opinion but I do believe that I am right.

Edited to add this link to an entry that I made regarding aftercare and it linked to a great 2 part article on the subject.

http://ready2please.livejournal.com/45871.html

[devifemme]

Sorry, R2P, those two related BDSM sites seem to have "evolved" commercially since you found the articles dealing with "aftercare" and cuddling following punishment. I cannot locate them, wading through a bunch of used-car, penis-enlargement and unrelated ads. (The site itself proclaims it is "for sale" -- lock, stock and [presumably] jet-ski rentals.)

Since you're so kind to be concerned, I'd really enjoy getting your take on Leathersub's punish-for-punishment's-sake (sex and cuddling being for her a whole separate dom/sub topic) -- as well as my slave-friend's seeking to "suffer" for her dom, rather than just to enjoy the pain (again, sex and fun being for HER a very different part of her Master/slave relationship). FYI it seems that my slave-friend chose not to engage with us here on her approach to punishment/suffering/etc.

Who knows? The neglect of my sexual desires by Joanne in the past 2 years may be a variant on these punishment scenarios...though I still doubt it!

Kisses,
J

[ready2please]

Well that is a shame, because as I recall it had very good information on aftercare. So good, that TBF read them very closely and practices quite a bit of that with me.

I doubt too that Joanne would neglect your sexual desires for 2 years as punishment. That seems very extreme. But, if you don't mind me asking, what was in it for her? Did she enjoy being Toppy with you, or was it only for you?

Has she lost a desire for all intimacy, or she has just backed away from the D/s stuff? I know you wrote about some together time on your trip, so it would appear her desire is not zero, but maybe she needs something other than what you need.

My husband doesn't have any desire to be D/s with me. Which is fine now, because I wouldn't trust him to do that to me anyway. TBF takes care of me now.