The Face That Launched A Thousand Ships Looks For A Harem

[beautifulmortal]

*clears throat prettily*

Hello, everyone. Helen, formerly of Troy, here. As Paris and I are now officially over, I am now opening applications for suitors. Please reply with your best proposal. Thank you!

Also: Achilles, Patroclus, darlings? Threesome?

Comments

[bfofchrist]

Hey, beautiful. My name is Levi, but most call me Biff. Let's list my good qualities, shall we? I am trained in both kung-fo and jew-do, I was trained by the very best in regards to bedroom activites, *wink* I am the best friend of the Messiah, and I can whisper sweet nothings in any tongue you wish. *grins at her*

[beautifulmortal]

Well, hello, handsome. Yes, I think you'll definitely be added to the list. Mmmm.

[bfofchrist]

*winks* Thanks, love. *grin*

[beautifulmortal]

*blows a kiss*

somewhat OT...

[think_sequins]

Helen! I really don't much like Paris any more, so now we're not rivals, can we be friends?! I really do think you are one of the prettiest out of everyone!

Re: somewhat OT...

[beautifulmortal]

Grr. Of course, dear. *smiles blindingly*

Re: somewhat OT...

[think_sequins]

Ohh, good! I'm so glad!

[illgotten]

...That, as they say, is very interesting.

[beautifulmortal]

... interested?

[illgotten]

Mmm. I don't think I'm your type, somehow.

[beautifulmortal]

Mmm. And why do you say that?

[totallycousins]

Totally, lovely.

[armorborrower]

Very totally.

[beautifulmortal]

Very fabulous.

[pfantastic]

*...looks rather pleased at this new development*

[beautifulmortal]

*also looks pleased, but zomg, totally isn't*