This chair is mine

[sweariwontdie]

Armand made some tea and claimed a chair in the main room. He had his sketchbook out, but wasn't drawing. He was thinking, and he didn't like what he was thinking. Feel free to interrupt him.

Comments

[ken_murata]

Murata walks in with a bright smile and a spring in his step. He sees Armand and cheerfully greets him, "Hello again!"

[ken_murata]

"Then maybe it's best to stay as you are. What do you think you've forgotten that you're so desperate to remember?"

[sweariwontdie]

"I want to remember people. I don't want to remember whatever it is that's frightening me so, even with no memory of it."

[ken_murata]

"It can be terrifying to remember," he says quietly. "Even the good things." He sounds as if he knows exactly what that's like.

[sweariwontdie]

The tone catches Armand's attention. "Is there something I should know about you?" he asks, suddenly concerned.

[ken_murata]

He smiles again, but mildly. "It's nothing for you to be concerned about. It's just my past."

[sweariwontdie]

"I was simply going to let it alone and remember what came naturally or try especially hard with people as they came back into my life..." There is a very loud silent 'but' there.

"I'm sorry that you're past is troubling as well. Perhaps you want to forget."

[ken_murata]

"Parts of it are troubling; others parts were wonderful... I should forget it now but I haven't quite let go yet. It still may be better for you to start afresh. Think of it as a new life."

[sweariwontdie]

"It is easier now that I recall my husband. It's just I have reactions to people that I don't know how to explain."

[ken_murata]

"Like you feel you know them or fear them or love them and you don't know why?"

[sweariwontdie]

Armand nods, his eyes widening at how perceptive Ken seems to be. "I only mind not knowing why I fear them."

[ken_murata]

"Do you think it would be best to remember? Or do you think you could just avoid them and not let curiosity get the better of you?"

[sweariwontdie]

"I don't wish to remember, but... I am terrible at resisting curiousity, even when it's for my own good."

[ken_murata]

He tilts his head. "Then perhaps what you need fixing is not your memory but your overly curious nature."

[sweariwontdie]

"How do you fix that? It's always been a part of me."

[ken_murata]

"Hm. I'm not sure... Maybe it just needs more self control. Especially if you already suspect that you're better off not remembering."