Saint Barbara Monastery
I decided to come here as sort of an afterthought. I was depressd and confused for the past couple months...not having achieved much of anything. I was not sure if I should continue searching for a monastery. I'm writing to say that St.Barbara's is perfect for me. From the first day, I was drawn into the life of things...welcomed with open arms...asked to sing at services and taught about the order of the services. There are seven nuns here officially, and one about to become a novice...And there are 2 women staying long term...whose lives were affected by Katrina....they are both from Nawlins, the Antiochian parish that I almost went to once. It is really amazing. There are lots of connections here...
There is a sister who even visited Holy Trinity, our church, and St. Michael's Skete (the monastic community that our church is close to both emotionally and physically. She did it about 10 years ago before she became a nun, when she was taking a tour of monasteries.
The monastery is lovely. It is near the town of Santa Paula, which is close to Santa Barbara. It is surrounded by mountains and we see deer from time to time. There are several cats, and one dog, who are all very much loved...awesome. Everyone is extremely kind and open...The sisters talk about their personal lives quite openly...in a way that would seem shocking to many people, but seems very healthy to me. There is a nun I love very much, because she is the type to take off her shoes and play with water guns. She is wonderful. Another I love because she is my height...and very much wiser than I ever hope to be. One of the women from Nawlins is about my age and we have very much in common.
Mother Victoria is willing to take me in, and she knows everything. She is very willing that I should go to visit my mother on a regular basis. She is familiar with my mom's nursing home (Ironically named the Victoria Care Center.) I think at least one of the sisters goes to visit the local nursing homes. Also, there is a priest here, which really makes the family unit complete. He is quiet and seems very wise. Mother Abbess says that he is a Saint. I know that there is something in his eyes which makes them difficult to look at. He has a blessedness there.
On the 3rd day Mother told me that I could stay. They are happy to have someone who sings. Unfortunately I am not a good housekeeper, but I could learn to be better. (I am also intimidated by cooking for a lot of people!) Anyway the main house is a beautiful wooden structure..I think cedar. And there are lots of long tall windows. There are not enough rooms/cells for the sisters, so a lot of us are staying in RVs. Which is kinda nice...they are really sweet. I like having my own little room/house.
I cannot explain how profound this experience has been for me. I am so glad...I really do feel now that as Mother Cassiana said, that the possibility exists for me to be a nun, but I just had to find the right community. I am so glad that Mother Victoria is willing to take me on. This is truly amazing and profound. One of the things that occured to me when I got here was - "This is just like St. Michael's Skete!" I mean that it is a community that truly worships...that truly is close to God - but there is plenty of fun and enjoyment in the living out of it. It is a gentle community of teaching (there are even classes), where one learns to live by the example of others. Another thing that occured to me the first day - I am at home. I am at peace here. As a friend tells me...you know where your place is if it gives you peace. Thank God I have found this place now. I almost gave up going...but I had some feeling...someone's prayers were sending me straight here... I am here in a place that I can worship God openly and truly. Mother Victoria, I hear, has her Bachelor's in physics and was the first woman to get a degree at St. Vlad's Seminary...not totally sure BUT I do know that she is kind and wise and has a place for me in her heart...
I knew from the first day that this could be home. I have a lot of things to work out...
I'm back at my dad's house...taking a little bit of time to work out what I need to stay there for a year. Some stuff has already taken care of...Others I need to get straightened out. I need to make some lists...I could be back there in a week or a few days...it depends...
Thank you for your prayers and thoughts. It seems lately I am losing track of everything and especially my purpose. How wonderful to be brought to a place like St. Barbara's...thank God I was given the courage to call.
I have a hard time believing that He will allow me this, but...even my Godmother says it looks to her like it's really being offered to me.
I better go write some lists.
There is a sister who even visited Holy Trinity, our church, and St. Michael's Skete (the monastic community that our church is close to both emotionally and physically. She did it about 10 years ago before she became a nun, when she was taking a tour of monasteries.
The monastery is lovely. It is near the town of Santa Paula, which is close to Santa Barbara. It is surrounded by mountains and we see deer from time to time. There are several cats, and one dog, who are all very much loved...awesome. Everyone is extremely kind and open...The sisters talk about their personal lives quite openly...in a way that would seem shocking to many people, but seems very healthy to me. There is a nun I love very much, because she is the type to take off her shoes and play with water guns. She is wonderful. Another I love because she is my height...and very much wiser than I ever hope to be. One of the women from Nawlins is about my age and we have very much in common.
Mother Victoria is willing to take me in, and she knows everything. She is very willing that I should go to visit my mother on a regular basis. She is familiar with my mom's nursing home (Ironically named the Victoria Care Center.) I think at least one of the sisters goes to visit the local nursing homes. Also, there is a priest here, which really makes the family unit complete. He is quiet and seems very wise. Mother Abbess says that he is a Saint. I know that there is something in his eyes which makes them difficult to look at. He has a blessedness there.
On the 3rd day Mother told me that I could stay. They are happy to have someone who sings. Unfortunately I am not a good housekeeper, but I could learn to be better. (I am also intimidated by cooking for a lot of people!) Anyway the main house is a beautiful wooden structure..I think cedar. And there are lots of long tall windows. There are not enough rooms/cells for the sisters, so a lot of us are staying in RVs. Which is kinda nice...they are really sweet. I like having my own little room/house.
I cannot explain how profound this experience has been for me. I am so glad...I really do feel now that as Mother Cassiana said, that the possibility exists for me to be a nun, but I just had to find the right community. I am so glad that Mother Victoria is willing to take me on. This is truly amazing and profound. One of the things that occured to me when I got here was - "This is just like St. Michael's Skete!" I mean that it is a community that truly worships...that truly is close to God - but there is plenty of fun and enjoyment in the living out of it. It is a gentle community of teaching (there are even classes), where one learns to live by the example of others. Another thing that occured to me the first day - I am at home. I am at peace here. As a friend tells me...you know where your place is if it gives you peace. Thank God I have found this place now. I almost gave up going...but I had some feeling...someone's prayers were sending me straight here... I am here in a place that I can worship God openly and truly. Mother Victoria, I hear, has her Bachelor's in physics and was the first woman to get a degree at St. Vlad's Seminary...not totally sure BUT I do know that she is kind and wise and has a place for me in her heart...
I knew from the first day that this could be home. I have a lot of things to work out...
I'm back at my dad's house...taking a little bit of time to work out what I need to stay there for a year. Some stuff has already taken care of...Others I need to get straightened out. I need to make some lists...I could be back there in a week or a few days...it depends...
Thank you for your prayers and thoughts. It seems lately I am losing track of everything and especially my purpose. How wonderful to be brought to a place like St. Barbara's...thank God I was given the courage to call.
I have a hard time believing that He will allow me this, but...even my Godmother says it looks to her like it's really being offered to me.
I better go write some lists.