Through the crown of the sakura tree - 8
Author: hikjang / delsogno
Fandom: DB5K
Pairings: Changmin x Junsu, Changmin x Yuri, Yoochun x Junsu, Yunho x Jaejoong
Genre: Romance, Angst, Psychological
Rating: PG 15
Disclaimer: They are not mine.
Theme music: Debussy's The Girl with the Flaxen Hair
Junsu looked at Changmin’s hand wrapping around his hand, feeling a sense of déjà vu.
Changmin had not appeared in front of Junsu for three weeks. Junsu had thought the absence would be forever.
The day after Yuri’s birthday party, Junsu had opened the door in the morning to a huge bouquet of lilies, delivered by a worker from some famous greenhouse. Inside the bouquet there was a card that read: "Junsu-sshi, thank you so much. The music was beautiful. Glad to have made your acquaintance." It was typed with no signature.
Changmin did not turn up for the Psych class anymore.
Junsu was upset. From what Yoochun had told him, it could be deduced that Changmin had only made friends with him to get him play that piece of music for Yuri. He was but a tool for Changmin to make up to his girlfriend. Now Changmin had cut off all communications with Junsu just like he was throwing away something no longer of use.
Junsu was pretty sure Changmin knew he liked him. And Changmin had dropped the class. Was Junsu just some cheap, desperate person who would chase after Changmin? And was Changmin so determined, so desperate to get rid of Junsu that he had to change his schedule?
They could have at least remained friends. But no. No phone numbers, no detailed addresses, no nothing. It was like one of those times you see someone walking away and you know they’d never come back.
Why did Changmin have to go such length, making such a complete cutoff?
Did Changmin view him with such disgust, because he was gay? Junsu felt so angry and insulted. If that was the case, it was not rejection on a personal level anymore, but was one on a social level, and that was like a slap to the face for Juns""u.
Junsu was too proud to let himself hurt too much because of this. He bit his lips. He did not let it out, he did not tell anyone. He knew there were other things he needed to do. At least, he would never see Changmin again. That would spare him all the shame. That was was he had thought.
Until today.
In the library, Junsu had turned around upon hearing someone speaking, and seen Changmin. Seeing Junsu, the guy looked mildly surprised, his eyes opened a bit wider than normal.
Changmin was only mildly surprised, but there was a whole storm forming inside Junsu. His heart beated fast, and all the possibilities of how much disgust and avoidance Changmin paid him played in his head, making him burn with humiliation. He did not show any of these feelings on his face, he was containing his breathing, but he was not sure he could keep it in once he opened his mouth.
There was no way in hell would he show Changmin how much effect that guy had on him. Changmin did not like him, probably viewed him as someone so disgusting and bothersome - just another one who fell for him, only a little bit worse because Junsu was a guy.
Each thought was killing Junsu.
So he did not say anything and turn back to the two girls, whose faces Junsu would rather not see but he suffered so at least he would not have to look at Changmin. Those girls were blabbing and Junsu found it so annoying but he would not be bothered. The narrow-minded would not end up well if they don’t learn how to behave. Junsu did not have the time or the energy to do them a favor by teaching them a lesson.
Junsu did not understand why Changmin was still dwelling there. Just leave already. But no. To Junsu’s surprise, Changmin had used what he was best at, words, to turn the two bully girls into two speechless, gaping, horrified faces. Then Changmin grasped Junsu’s hand and pulled him out of the library.
Changmin seemed so cheerful - a smile perpetually on his lips. He was walking briskly as if he was walking on clouds. Junsu had to try to keep up with Changmin’s long legs. All the while, Changmin was holding his hand, although some people had recognized them and started to talk.
Déjà vu.
It was like the first time they had met, in that Psych class. That time, Changmin had also intervened to defend Junsu.
Junsu had never needed anyone to help him in any situations involving other people, because he didn’t care about those trivias anyway. He did not care about the vanity, the greed, the thirst for power, the envy that people threw out everyday because even if he tried, they would not change. Human nature resists changes. Junsu did not want to get himself involved in dirty realities. He detached himself from all but some few exceptions like Yoochun and Jaejoong. Junsu was alone in his own world, a whole of music and solitude, yet he was happy with this aloneness.
But Changmin had walked into Junsu’s world. Though longing for that person in an inexplicable way, Junsu would not hold him because he knew wanderers would eventually leave. Changmin had Yuri so he had to leave. Changmin only used Junsu and wanted nothing to do with Junsu.
Junsu watched Changmin leave.
But it doesn’t matter, Junsu thought. He still had something he wanted to do in life. To complete that task he just did not have time for anything else - he did not have time for heartbreaks.
But these Junsu could not think of when he stared at Changmin’s long backside as the guy pulled him along. He could not think anything as he was watching Changmin’s bright, beautiful, boyish smiles. He could think nothing when he looked at Changmin’s peaceful sleeping face, under the sakura tree. If you want to leave then why don’t you just leave? He wanted to ask Changmin, looking at that other guy’s nostrils moving lightly with each even breath.
He stared at the surface of the lake in front of them. It was so blue. Was it the color of the water, or the color of the reflected sky?
For a long while, it felt like time did not flow.
Until a sweet female voice called, “Junsu-ssi?”
Junsu turned back. It was Yuri, Changmin’s girlfriend, in a floral, chiffon blouse and a knee-length skyblue skirt, looking classy and beautiful with her wavy hair falling on the slender neck. A splendid beauty indeed. Junsu had seen her on her birthday party, and had had to tell himself, That is the girl Changmin belongs to.
Yuri was holding in her arm what seemed like a navy blue male blazer - probably Changmin’s. “I was in the library with Changmin but he suddenly disappeared. People said they saw him with you going this way,” She said. Junsu nodded in ackowledgement. “Hello, Yuri-ssi.”
Yuri smiled. She called, “Changm-“ but Junsu had put his index finger on his lips, signaling silence. He said in a quiet voice, “Changmin-ssi is sleeping.”
There was a ghostly hint of surprise sweeping through Yuri’s face, but it had come and gone so quickly that Junsu was not sure whether it had actually been there. Yuri’s face was very hard to read, no matter what expression she showed on it. Like Changmin, she was the daughter of a third generation industrialist, well trained to know what should be on display.
Junsu stood up. “I have to go now. You can stay with your boyfriend.”
With that, he walked away.
Late at night, just getting out of practice, Junsu took out his phone and checked the messages and calls.
Yoochun: Su, wanna go to the beach this weekend?
6 Missed calls from Yoochun
jjhyung: Su, why did you let it slip to Yunho I went clubbing and didn’t come home the other day? I was only drinking with Seunghyun!
divajung: Su, tell me the truth. How many nights has Jae spent out????
jjhyung: Su, Yunho tied me to the bed!
And yet you can still text. Junsu massaged his temples. I should have known better than to get involved in the JaeHo drama. He checked the next messages.
Unknown number: Hey, do you like basketball? I have a varsity match this Thursday. Come.
End 8
Fandom: DB5K
Pairings: Changmin x Junsu, Changmin x Yuri, Yoochun x Junsu, Yunho x Jaejoong
Genre: Romance, Angst, Psychological
Rating: PG 15
Disclaimer: They are not mine.
Theme music: Debussy's The Girl with the Flaxen Hair
Junsu looked at Changmin’s hand wrapping around his hand, feeling a sense of déjà vu.
Changmin had not appeared in front of Junsu for three weeks. Junsu had thought the absence would be forever.
The day after Yuri’s birthday party, Junsu had opened the door in the morning to a huge bouquet of lilies, delivered by a worker from some famous greenhouse. Inside the bouquet there was a card that read: "Junsu-sshi, thank you so much. The music was beautiful. Glad to have made your acquaintance." It was typed with no signature.
Changmin did not turn up for the Psych class anymore.
Junsu was upset. From what Yoochun had told him, it could be deduced that Changmin had only made friends with him to get him play that piece of music for Yuri. He was but a tool for Changmin to make up to his girlfriend. Now Changmin had cut off all communications with Junsu just like he was throwing away something no longer of use.
Junsu was pretty sure Changmin knew he liked him. And Changmin had dropped the class. Was Junsu just some cheap, desperate person who would chase after Changmin? And was Changmin so determined, so desperate to get rid of Junsu that he had to change his schedule?
They could have at least remained friends. But no. No phone numbers, no detailed addresses, no nothing. It was like one of those times you see someone walking away and you know they’d never come back.
Why did Changmin have to go such length, making such a complete cutoff?
Did Changmin view him with such disgust, because he was gay? Junsu felt so angry and insulted. If that was the case, it was not rejection on a personal level anymore, but was one on a social level, and that was like a slap to the face for Juns""u.
Junsu was too proud to let himself hurt too much because of this. He bit his lips. He did not let it out, he did not tell anyone. He knew there were other things he needed to do. At least, he would never see Changmin again. That would spare him all the shame. That was was he had thought.
Until today.
In the library, Junsu had turned around upon hearing someone speaking, and seen Changmin. Seeing Junsu, the guy looked mildly surprised, his eyes opened a bit wider than normal.
Changmin was only mildly surprised, but there was a whole storm forming inside Junsu. His heart beated fast, and all the possibilities of how much disgust and avoidance Changmin paid him played in his head, making him burn with humiliation. He did not show any of these feelings on his face, he was containing his breathing, but he was not sure he could keep it in once he opened his mouth.
There was no way in hell would he show Changmin how much effect that guy had on him. Changmin did not like him, probably viewed him as someone so disgusting and bothersome - just another one who fell for him, only a little bit worse because Junsu was a guy.
Each thought was killing Junsu.
So he did not say anything and turn back to the two girls, whose faces Junsu would rather not see but he suffered so at least he would not have to look at Changmin. Those girls were blabbing and Junsu found it so annoying but he would not be bothered. The narrow-minded would not end up well if they don’t learn how to behave. Junsu did not have the time or the energy to do them a favor by teaching them a lesson.
Junsu did not understand why Changmin was still dwelling there. Just leave already. But no. To Junsu’s surprise, Changmin had used what he was best at, words, to turn the two bully girls into two speechless, gaping, horrified faces. Then Changmin grasped Junsu’s hand and pulled him out of the library.
Changmin seemed so cheerful - a smile perpetually on his lips. He was walking briskly as if he was walking on clouds. Junsu had to try to keep up with Changmin’s long legs. All the while, Changmin was holding his hand, although some people had recognized them and started to talk.
Déjà vu.
It was like the first time they had met, in that Psych class. That time, Changmin had also intervened to defend Junsu.
Junsu had never needed anyone to help him in any situations involving other people, because he didn’t care about those trivias anyway. He did not care about the vanity, the greed, the thirst for power, the envy that people threw out everyday because even if he tried, they would not change. Human nature resists changes. Junsu did not want to get himself involved in dirty realities. He detached himself from all but some few exceptions like Yoochun and Jaejoong. Junsu was alone in his own world, a whole of music and solitude, yet he was happy with this aloneness.
But Changmin had walked into Junsu’s world. Though longing for that person in an inexplicable way, Junsu would not hold him because he knew wanderers would eventually leave. Changmin had Yuri so he had to leave. Changmin only used Junsu and wanted nothing to do with Junsu.
Junsu watched Changmin leave.
But it doesn’t matter, Junsu thought. He still had something he wanted to do in life. To complete that task he just did not have time for anything else - he did not have time for heartbreaks.
But these Junsu could not think of when he stared at Changmin’s long backside as the guy pulled him along. He could not think anything as he was watching Changmin’s bright, beautiful, boyish smiles. He could think nothing when he looked at Changmin’s peaceful sleeping face, under the sakura tree. If you want to leave then why don’t you just leave? He wanted to ask Changmin, looking at that other guy’s nostrils moving lightly with each even breath.
He stared at the surface of the lake in front of them. It was so blue. Was it the color of the water, or the color of the reflected sky?
For a long while, it felt like time did not flow.
Until a sweet female voice called, “Junsu-ssi?”
Junsu turned back. It was Yuri, Changmin’s girlfriend, in a floral, chiffon blouse and a knee-length skyblue skirt, looking classy and beautiful with her wavy hair falling on the slender neck. A splendid beauty indeed. Junsu had seen her on her birthday party, and had had to tell himself, That is the girl Changmin belongs to.
Yuri was holding in her arm what seemed like a navy blue male blazer - probably Changmin’s. “I was in the library with Changmin but he suddenly disappeared. People said they saw him with you going this way,” She said. Junsu nodded in ackowledgement. “Hello, Yuri-ssi.”
Yuri smiled. She called, “Changm-“ but Junsu had put his index finger on his lips, signaling silence. He said in a quiet voice, “Changmin-ssi is sleeping.”
There was a ghostly hint of surprise sweeping through Yuri’s face, but it had come and gone so quickly that Junsu was not sure whether it had actually been there. Yuri’s face was very hard to read, no matter what expression she showed on it. Like Changmin, she was the daughter of a third generation industrialist, well trained to know what should be on display.
Junsu stood up. “I have to go now. You can stay with your boyfriend.”
With that, he walked away.
Late at night, just getting out of practice, Junsu took out his phone and checked the messages and calls.
Yoochun: Su, wanna go to the beach this weekend?
6 Missed calls from Yoochun
jjhyung: Su, why did you let it slip to Yunho I went clubbing and didn’t come home the other day? I was only drinking with Seunghyun!
divajung: Su, tell me the truth. How many nights has Jae spent out????
jjhyung: Su, Yunho tied me to the bed!
And yet you can still text. Junsu massaged his temples. I should have known better than to get involved in the JaeHo drama. He checked the next messages.
Unknown number: Hey, do you like basketball? I have a varsity match this Thursday. Come.
End 8