i think you and i are very alike darling, because you just described so many things that i have felt and things that i still feel now. which makes me kind of sad that you're moving away from my side of the country :( so i'm going to leave you a ridiculously long comment
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it helps to know that you've gone through the same things, definitely. sometimes you just need to vent everything out, you know...and you tend to forget that youre not the only one with those problems, and theyre not as huge as you make them out to be. writing in this journal kind of calms me down a bit, i guess. thanks, i feel less meh <3 <3
yeah, thats totally how i feel - its not like i stop loving them or love them less, i just need my own time and space, too. and i wish i was as smart as you, hahaha. at the time, working with him seemed like a perfect idea. my pay was almost doubled from my previous job, and of course, getting be be around him more was nice, but at first we werent living together....thats when i couldnt take it.
ok, I know that moving out here might not be exactly what you want. If you really don't want to do it, why are you then? There has to be some good reasons, good enough to do it
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i think ive been really honest to myself and everyone that going back to california is a last resort. if i had my choice, id much rather live in the city until i can afford to go to parsons or get into a different program. but josh wont do that now and he wont move to an entirely new place either. so it was stay in new york or move to california. and frankly, im sick of northern new york.
its not that im worried i wont have a good time, its just that im nervous about it all. i guess i cant really explain it.
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...think you can pencil me into your busy schedule for a quick hello?
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its not that im worried i wont have a good time, its just that im nervous about it all. i guess i cant really explain it.
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