My struggle to pick up a pen

[deliverer]

I remember a time when I might have been innocent. I used to draw and others liked what I drew. I was really good at math. I used to kiss my female teachers good morning and goodbye every day. I was naive. I didn't know any better. Other children were cruel but I had my escape when I picked up a pen. It seemed like a good time in spite of

Comments

[deliverer]

I got tired of it being in my head so I took the time to "write" it down.

[deliverer]

It's like a friend of mine up here once told me. All you have to do is not care about the results.

I'll probably look back on this and be tempted to add things as I remember them. It's probably best that I never do that.

[the_carrot]

I appear to be a monster on the outside but striving to be a saint on the inside.

I feel that way myself. The secret is that people are only going to see what you let them see. Let them see the the saint.

[wobblerlorri]

Deep, thoughtful and heart-wrenching. I can identify with some parts, other parts I'm glad I have no basis of reference.

I wish healing and smooth sailing for you, my friend.

You're still coherent enough to write etc after all that- you're ahead of most .

[capybyra]

Most folks who go thru that degree of mishap wind up almost as insane as me.And yeah, I consider you as a bit more sane than most of us. See- you are open about details most of us would literally withdraw into catatonic fugue rather than process. Let alone share.Trauma is how we become whatever we make of our selves. Some folks give in and crumble. The mental image I have for you is that cartoon frog being swallowed by duck etc and reaching it's arms around to try strangling the critter trying to eat it. It's often titled. DEFIANCE... yeah- that's you. Keep up the defiance my friend. It's the one thing that gives "us" an edge over "them"

[nurzrachet]

D, where ya been? Your writing is very intense, so I know you're okay.