Screencaps of Evermore Highlights Entry--Switching and Bitching

Aug 29, 2008 00:39

First item of business! mega_hassi was inspired by the last episode into CROSSOVER MAYHEM!



I swear, I like it more every time I watch it :D Thanks, Mega Hassi, for bringing GREAT JUSTICE to this screencap adventure!

Moving on. Yes, I once again allowed a fair amount of time to slip by between updates. I could blame it on my connection repeatedly dying, but you wanna know what the truth is?

I HATE THIS DUNGEON. WITH A PASSION. IT'S LONG AND CONFUSING AND BROWN AND THERE ARE THREE ZILLION SWITCHES. Playing through it was bad enough, but then trying to work out how to make it entertaining for YOU guys? I have a reputation to keep up, after all...

So, after a lot of stalling and some discussion with NeutralTwin (read his awesome adventures NAO!), I took his advice and made this episode a "highlights" entry, culling the tedious stuff for the sake of a more entertaining experience. A brief weeding of any shot with a switch in it later, the cap-batch was reduced by a full third and gleamed like a shiny gleaming thing. It's not as thorough as the others I've done, but it should be as interesting, with any luck.

So! Bitching and mooing aside, when we last saw our heroes, they bought rare and overpriced souvenirs from an authentic Roman marketplace, crossed the desert once more on the rowboat of a tourist-minded ghost pirate, and met Professor Horace Highwater, another elusive Podunk resident. Now, they continue their search for the mysterious Diamond Eyes in a twisting labyrinth. Will there be a minotaur? Read on to find out!



Ahhhh, well-rested and ready to go! Surely the next leg of our adventure will be a breeze!



Although the body count in the area is admittedly worrying. Hey, Horace, go easy on the hired help, willya?



These trees are a pain in the ass. There are some alchemy ingredients in among the roots, but if you wander too far in and lose sight of yourself, you can get lost and it takes a long time to wander out again. I seem to recall having to reset once, but I could be mistaken. They also eat kites.



And people, apparently.



You will not foil me this time, bottomless pit!



Okay, let's try this blinky-eye-formula...thing.



It goes BRIIIIIR



then silent sparklies









then NYYYYAR-BAM



and then KA-ROAD!

That part doesn't actually make a noise. But I do. In my head. Because I can.



And ta-da, a bridge! Nice and shiny and blue! It kinda sparkles, too. Real high-shelf quality. And it leads to...



...a temple! Or...something. It's never really specified, it could be a dentist's office gone horribly wrong, I guess.



It does look a lot like my dentist's office, after all, with the pillars an' everything. Except there's no fishtank. Probably doesn't have a popcorn ceiling, either.



Rats, rats! These guys zip around all over the place and are really hard to hit, although the Dog has slightly better luck. It's okay, though, since they rarely attack, do next-to-no damage, and give next-to-no EXP. They're really just ambient enemies, which is kinda nice.



MY GOODNESS, WHAT'S THAT GLOOPING THIS WAY



GLOOP



GLOOP. heeeee, seriously, I love watching these little guys flip over. It's such a jaunty animation!



Jaunty and TASTY animation!



What, not even Dire? I'm disappointed. Meanwhile, Andre lunges at Matt, teeth bared



Hmmm, I wonder what this is? I BET WE'LL FIND OUT LATER.



asfdjk'aljkdfj EVERYTHING BLEEDS...Nectar? ...well, so much for THAT running joke. But, uh, I wouldn't eat that, Matt. Srsly.
Matt: But it's a LIME Slime :<



AND NOW, A MAGIC TRICK



TA-DA

Seriously, you CAN step out on invisible bridges, they're just nigh-impossible to cross.

However, when I was a kid, a file of mine either got hijacked or I was fooling around on someone else's, I don't recall...either way, I found myself in this temple with no knowledge of Revealer. Since the exit was connected to the rest of the world by another invisible bridge, I couldn't go find OUT about Revealer (this was long before GameFAQs, mind). So do I do the logical thing and start a new file? No, I spend HOURS trying to cross the bridge by inching across and guessing at the edges.

Ordinarily, I'd be grousing about that kind of time loss, but not now. Why? Well, let's recreate the situation.



WHUPSFELLOVER









That's it, Matt, keep a positive attitude!



Matt: hint hint



WHUPSFELLOVERAGAIN





t'hee. Somebody's gettin' a little snarky.



OVER THE EDGE ONCE MORE



Matt: LIKE, GUUUUUY >O

He goes quiet after this.


Unless, of course, you're stubborn enough to drop them ten more times (yes, I counted), in which case...





?







:O!





I. FREAKING. LOVE. THIS. GAME.

It figures the first Easter Egg I ever found was one loaded with self-referential humor |D



Anyway, back to the ol' grind.



Game: *grabs controls away from player*
NO WAIT THOSE ARE MINE



Game: *ka-PAN*
Jerk >(





Something to throw, huh?



That can be arranged.



only apparently I missed the shot of him throwing it and saying it wasn't heavy enough. WTF, me. So, exploring the rest of the area until I find whatever I need. Familiar ground! Familiar invisible ground, even!



Enemies can also wander out (and occasionally get trapped) on the bridges. In my tries to get across sans-formula, I tried to bully them out and follow their steps. No luck |D



Oh, look! A switch!



A door or a small earthquake. Gotta love that SNES-era Squaresoft Jack-of-all-trades rumble sound effect #12!



Better clear the perimeter before wandering off, though.



An outcropping! With a lady! This must be the next evolutionary link in the "cave with a dude" species!





Okay, random lady whose only purpose it is to save my game and apparently doesn't have to eat or drink or anything, just sit in the middle of an abandoned temple waiting for a protagonist that will MAYBE show up. MAYBE.
NPC: Them's the breaks.



NPC: Bring civilization!



Aha, a door! Or at least a bit of light that could conceivably come from a door.

(At this point, things got so long and confusing and same-y that I started culling caps. Assume that any "missing" content is either a corridor or a switch.)



Aha, a...pit! Oops.



He's repeating himself. I hope the fall didn't concuss him :<



Matt: wait wait I saw this in Guinea Pigs from the Planet Squeeeeee *knock knock*



Matt: *knock knock*



Matt: *KNOCK KNOCK*
Why, a false wall! :O Well played, sir!
Matt: :D
Andre: wtfever |(



Hey, it's kinda hard to see in here.



Through the magic of ZSNES, I can make the sprites visible and save myself some grief...



...but for the spirit of the thing, I will not! I'm so noble! besides, it doesn't really help that much |D



Besides, there's an old legit trick I can pull out in dire situations...



...the Item Wheel! There I am! :D



Marco?



Matt: Polo!



Marco!



Matt: Polo!



Marco!



Matt: I CAN SEE :D
You lose!
Matt: :<
Andre: wtf. that's not even how you play. dumbasses.

Anyway, this better be worth it.



...I NEVER USE THIS STUFF :D



Well, that was a waste of time. Let's go.



Aha, a timed switch!



Yes, I said a timed switch. Don't give me that look, just move your sorry buns over there before the bridge breaks.
Matt: :<
Andre: Like hell, more food.



WE MADE IT WE MADE IT WE MADE IT WE



Matt?

...Matt?



oh hell.



exclaims Matt like Captain Kirk pulling a ret-con out of his ass



Jeez, touchy touchy.



Okay, REALLY managed it this time. Moving on.



There was another switch over there--hence, another door. Getting the idea?



WHAT

WHAT IS THAT HULKING BRUTE

COULD IT BE THAT THE LABYRINTH IS TRADITIONAL ENOUGH TO HAVE THE GREAT GUARDIAN BEAST, THE--



--Mini-Taur?
MiniTaur: Hey, at least I'm not dosing, man.

Secret of Evermore--supporting a clean Olympics



D'HURR HURR HURR I SCREENCAPZ GUD. seriously he could be anally violating Matt back there and we wouldn't know. would explain Andre's OMGWTFBBQ posture. wheeeee.



Anyway, the Mini-Boss--*cough* sorry, Mini-Taur goes down pretty fast.





And hands out a boatload of experience, apparently. It was at this point that I realized that, as usual, I attacked the harder of the two dungeons that you can take on in either order first. I don't know why I always forget, I just DO. Lots of healing and grumbling behind the scenes, I can assure you.



power of the yadda yadda yadda let's go









The sad part is that shiny little animation is ONE OF THE MOST INTERESTING THINGS IN THIS DUNGEON



Okay, okay. Switch.



Venting Andre's residual Level 3 attack on a rat.
Andre: he knows what he did. |)



Door.



MORE SWITCHES. OH BOY. These raise and lower different pillars according to the order you step on them.



The heck? Either my eyes are going from the endless brown corridors of sameitude, or that slime's off-color.



asdlf;jkl;'klsdfa A PALETTE SWAP?! The dungeon's long enough to have its own %&**%&ing PALETTE SWAP?!

...well, at least it's a pretty color |(





Into the walls again, yay. This would be neater if it weren't so hard to get around once you're inside.



Anyway, some flailing later...



:O! Okay, THAT was worth it.



AUGH OW WHO'S GETTING HIT WHAT'S GOING ON
Matt: I stubbed my toe! D:
Andre: wuss.



Well, this doesn't look dangerous at all :D



RUNNING



RUNNING



FALLING



Yeah, yeah, always an elevator. Stupid magic collapsing floor. Luckily, there's a bug in the player's favor for situations like this.



Charge up any weapon to level 3, hold down both B and A, and...



...you can run forever. Every time the gauge runs out, it'll automatically fill up again. Nifty, but of limited use.



randomly taking out my frustrations on the rats



Andre: RAT MUST DIE
Andre's expression here pretty much sums up my feelings on this dungeon, actually.



HEY LOOK MORE SWITCHES



THIS IS A SET OF SEVEN SWITCHES THAT CAN BE PRESSED IN ANY ORDER. WHY??? WHO KNOWS???



Oh, and in case I didn't mention, these enemies will BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU if you don't keep healing. WHEE.



hee hee, gloop.



TWICE

LEVELED UP TWICE IN THIS GODFORSAKEN LABYRINTH

AND THAT DOES NOT HAPPEN IN THIS GAME OFTEN



Hey, that's different. Well, we can still take him out no problem, right guys?



Three minutes later...

FALL DOWN

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THINGS HOLY, WHY ARE YOU NOT FALLING DOWN

YOU GUYS ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE LIKE 80 HP



Ohhh, he's a SPECIAL monk. That makes him the most unannounced mini-boss ever. Seriously, he just saunters out of nowhere and casually dies. He's metro mini. oh God I don't even know what I'm saying anymore



YES YES FINALLY BWAHAHAHAAAAA



I HAVE THE POWAAAAAAH



meanwhile, Matt has been reduced to scraping unidentifiable fluids from the undersides of his dead foes for nourishment
Matt: I'm so hungry . .



SPEAR THROW



BRIDGE GET



I'd better save real quick, 'cause sure as ships and seashells I ain't goin' through THAT mess again.



TEN THOUSAND EXP SINCE THE BEGINNING OF THE DUNGEON

TEN THOUSAND FREAKING EXP



HEY BOSS, SOMEBODY HAS SOME PENT-UP AGGRESSION TO PROJECT IN THE FORM OF FIREY DESTRUCTION



...huh. Empty.



WAIT WHAT



GOD DON'T THE BOSSES IN THIS PLACE KNOCK



Yes sir and boy howdy, that's Secret of Evermore for ya! Two minotaurs to your dungeon, double bang for your buck!





AND HE'S A HEALER

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE



He can also jump in and out of the flamebuckets, inexplicably. More explicably if you remember the boss from the volcano. ROCK DINOSAUR EVOLVED INTO...MEGATAUR! PLAYER LEARNED CURSE INCOHERENTLY!



I have absolutely no idea what is happening here



YES! YES! EAT VITRIOL AND DIE, COW-FUCKER!

(What? It's technically correct...)



Loot does little to soothe the gamer's spirit in this rare instance



wait what why is this doing this what



HOORAY I DON'T KNOW AND DON'T CARE WHEEEE



YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY FINALLY DIAMOND EYE YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY



OH GOD SWEET SUNLIGHT, WE HAVE MISSED YOU SO! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU



WE'RE BACK WE'RE BACK WE'RE HAVE THE DIAMOND EYE GUYS WE'RE BACK



WHY DID YOU NOT GIVE ME THIS EARLIER I DON'T KNOW BUT WE'RE BACK SO I DON'T CAAAARE



JUBILIATION!



Oh, right, actually gotta unequip something. Hm.



Speed, we don't need you anymore.
Matt: i need you . .
We will get you into rehab, Matt.





t'hee. SINGLE FILE, EXIT IN AN ORDERLY MANNER.







I believe I was maxed out beforehand, so I healed...over twenty times? Blimey.



Why thank you :D You're a good guy, Horace Highwater.







Horace: Behold! Is this your card?
Matt: GADZOOKS! :O
Andre: you're a rube, Matt |(



Ohhhh, right, I still need to use these. Not that I'm a hoarder or anything, but I'm a hoarder. Next dungeon, promise.



This doesn't come in until a couple of areas later, I think. I rarely use Call Beads, so I'm not sure.



I NEARLY CHEWED OFF MY OWN ARM IN FRUSTRATION BUT IT'S DONE! PRAISE ME PRAISE ME PRAISE ME! :D :D :D





:D

:D

:D

...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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