Under the Impression [[2/?]]
Title: Under The Influense
Author: dee_jayDJ
Rating: Errrr.... PG-13 this chapter for brief boykissing and frequent swearing.
Pairing: Zack/Alex, with mentions of Jack/Alex
Summary: As a forever toiled-over Alex reveals something private with Zack, his whole world is flipped over and he has to fight to make sense of what he used to believe was true.
Disclaimer: I do not own All Time Low, else Zack wouldn't be put through so much stress all the time ._.
Author Notes: Sooo, I know it's been ages since I last posted, but I've been going through a lot of stress at home lately. I'm gonna try and bang these chapters out a little quicker, but here's chapter two for ya!
PS-- I'm also currently looking for a beta, so if you'd be interested, drop me a line and we can talk a bit!
“Alex kissed me!”
Oh… Shit.
Zack really couldn’t believe he’d just fucking blurted that out. Damnit, Jack was going to kill him. That was the only thing that would possibly happen, Jack would flip a shit and kill him. Zack closed his eyes in anticipation for the onslaught of Jack’s fury he knew was to co-
“Alex kisses a lot of people, Zack. Well… Especially my dick, but that’s not the point.” Jack replied with a laugh, causing Zack’s eyes to snap open with a start, looking at the guitarist. He misunderstood. Holy crap, thank God, Jack completely misunderstood! Everyone knew how affectionate Alex could be, and that’s what Jack thought he meant…
And Zack was not about to tell him any different. “Oh… Uh… Alri-“
“Jackieee! Where’d you put my lighter?!” came the voice of Zack’s unspoken affection, none other than Alex Gaskarth himself. The brown-eyed boy appeared after a few seconds, holding an unlit cigarette and looking incredibly irritated.
“Oh… uh… I kinda gave it to… I gave it to Rian…? He said something about lighting something of Matt’s on fire, but I can’t remember too well…” Jack explained lamely, possibly one of the worst lies he’d ever spouted off. And he had a smile that showed he knew very well how bad that lie was, but choosing not to tell Alex the truth.
Zack kind of hated how easy their relationship was. They could be as open as they wanted to be, really, and Zack was insanely jealous. Something he normally wasn’t.
He was quite abruptly snapped out of his revere by the unexpected weight put on his lap, as well as the arms that fell around his neck. Now, it wasn’t a very strange thing for Alex to sit in people’s laps, but after what had been told to him the night before, Alex taking his seat on top of Zack seemed especially awkward.
“Hmm… Zack, do you know where Jack hid my lighter?” Alex asked quietly, nuzzling comfortably into Zack.
Damnit…
“No, I really have no clue.” Zack murmured quietly, resisting the urge to put his own arms around Alex’s waist. At least not with Jack literally sitting right there. A slight shiver passed through the blonde as he felt Alex’s breath wash over his skin with his sigh of exasperation.
“Well, fuck all of you. I’ll just look around your shit until I find it.” Alex said irritably, getting up off Zack’s lap. He was already aching to have him back again, as miserable as it seemed to him. Jack sighed and got up not long after Alex, not seeming to have noticed Zack’s plummeting mood.
“Fiiiine Alex!” Zack heard as the two retreated, looking up in time to see a smiling Jack pull Alex into his arms. The dull ache for contact that lingered from before turned into a raging pain that ripped across his chest. Damn lucky, Jack was. He had everything, the only thing, Zack would ever want in life.
Zack considered going back to sleep, but that was soon deemed out of the question as a slightly flushed Alex returned to his bunk once more. “We’re at a rest stop. Jack’s going inside to buy me a new lighter- turns out he lost mine.” he said with a small smile, looking the littlest bit anxious.
“Fabulous.” Zack murmured, a little sarcastically, as he stood himself. Alex seemed to notice Zack’s attitude and frowned, reaching his hand to gently take Zack’s in his own.
“Zack… What’s wrong?” he asked quietly, sounding truly confused. And as much as it truly killed Zack to do it, he tugged his hand away from Alex’s.
“You really don’t know?” the bassist deadpanned, turning to look at Alex with as much of a neutral expression as he could manage, as unsuccessful as that was.
“I… Zack… I’m sorry but-“
“You’re sorry?! Alex, you’re acting like absolutely nothing happened, that you didn’t get my fucking hopes up!” Zack interrupted, wincing as he heard his voice crack. “How could you possibly say you’re sorry?”
The look on Alex’s face told Zack that he’s probably said enough. He turned away from the brunette once more, every beat of his heart sending a shuddering pain through his whole body. He’d never been so harsh to Alex before.
But apparently Alex didn’t care too much, by the way his arms wrapped around Zack’s waist from behind in a hug that sent his heart racing. Alex’s lips touched lightly to the side of Zack’s neck, almost in a comforting way.
“I am sorry, Zachary. Don’t fucking assume things. I’m sorry, I know this can’t be easy on you.”
If it wasn’t for the fact Zack was completely stunned, he would’ve barked out something sarcastic in response to that. Finally, after what seemed like ages, Zack turned so he was facing Alex. He swallowed thickly, before he gently took the side of Alex’s face in his hand.
The blonde ducked his head a bit, pressing his own lips to Alex’s in a true movie-perfect kiss. Mouth slightly open, eyes shut, and his thumb very gently stroking the smooth skin of Alex’s cheek, Zack did everything he could to burn the taste and feel of Alex’s mouth into his head. Pulling away much sooner than he’d like, Zack looked down at Alex with unshed tears swimming in front of his eyes.
“You have no idea how hard this is, Alex. I l…” He choked around the declaration of his feelings, shaking his head and pulling away from Alex fully. “But I’m not going to make it hard for you, too. You’re happy with Jack, I’m not going to be the one to ruin that. From now on… We’re just band mates, Alex. Nothing more than that.”
It really did kill Zack to say that, but one more minute hoping Ale would choose him was going to drive him insane.
It almost looked like Alex was going to start crying too, but Zack wasn’t going to stick around and find out. It’d just hurt too bad.
Rubbing roughly at the back of his neck, Zack turned and once more walked away from the object of his adoration, out of the bus.
He fucking wanted a cup of fucking coffee…!