The dream I chased and catched in Munich on 22nd

[artcika]

Here. My, most probably, the experience that I'm gonna cherish the most. *_*
WARNING: it's like 3,700 of words - LONG.
Though you can skip the first paragraph.



The traveling for me started on 21st. I left home early in the morning for a bus, going to the airport, but ended up going there with some random man who asked for the same price as the bus. I was sitting in the plane before half past 12 in the afternoon. We landed in Munich a bit before 2pm. I needed to meet Lisa (the girl who catched the shirt in London live LOL) there, even though none of my text messages reached her, I found her in a half of an hour, sitting at some cafe. After a while of talking her friend Suguru showed up in front of us reaching a hand for a “hello”. =] In no time we moved to the other part of the airport center and bought something to drink, then left to the hostel.
We reached it after about an hour. Expecting to get the same room all three of us we sadly were separated: me and Lisa ending up at the 4th floor and Suguru at the 5th. I was quite ”lucky” getting a messy room of 5 mexican guys (lol) , gladly they all happened to be all nice and friendly, and were leaving for the night out coming back just about at 5am in the morning of the 22nd , when I was already awake. Of course we spent some time on the 21st , um probably the whole day, in the city just walking around. Suguru needed to get his ticket for the concert, so me and Lisa ended up sitting at some cafe and just chating for a while. We met him again with 2 other German girls (one of them sold him a ticket). So we just spent some time with them and of course went to eat. Weirdly, but I couldn’t even look at the food (LOL) probably because we were drinking and drinking all day, but I still ended up ordering salad and getting them into my stomach…(lol)
We got back to the hostel at around 10pm, and after a while met up in a balcony/terrace-kind-of place with the bar. We were talking a little and trying to figure out when to wake up for the next day. Finally, I was the one in duty to wake Lisa up so she can wake up Suguru ..Interesting idea being an alarm clock for each other…(lol)

I hadn’t much sleep that night because it was crazily hot and well the fact that there will be a bunch of guys coming back from a night out wasn’t making it for the good …(lol) It was 7am when I climbed out of the bed and went to get ready for the day, THAT DAY.*_*
I woken Lisa up as I was asked and in a while all 3 of us met up at around 9:30m or so and left at around 10am.
Before that Andrea texted me back asking me to come and meet her at the train station. Since we had some time left till her train, Lisa, Suguru and me went to get something to eat and drink. It was boiling hot outside already. We found a supermarket and bought some food, after we were done we went to the train station, and were there almost on time when the train arrived at the platform. Shame on me I couldn’t really recognize Andrea (ansnnn ) but she did recognize me..(lol) After that, everybody left to get the tickets for a train to the venue, and we met an other fan, an asian girl, who was supposed to go to the concert with her friend but she didn’t show up and she asked if she can go with us..
When the ticket was in the hands they all left to the venue except for me and Andrea, I needed to go with her to the hostel and then we had to go back to the train station to meet Timi (sasaki18 ).
So after the hostel Andrea and me were walking around the city. I couldn’t shut up all the time, I bet it was annoying.. *sorry, girl lol* (lol) After a while my feet were almost dead and I was really tired when we went back to the station to meet Timi, I was kind of wondering what I’m gonna do at the concert if I’m already feeling like doing nothing..(lol) Anyway… Both of us - me and Andrea were quite worried that Timi’s train might be really late and we won’t make it on time to the venue, but that thing arrived almost on time. At first it wasn’t easy to find Timi but after some minutes I spotted her standing right in front of us. So we rushed back to the hostel as quick as possible to clear things up for their room and finally leave to the venue. Since there were some silly official stuff that the hostel staff didn’t informed Andrea about, we took longer than we expected and it was already 4pm when the things were done and we speeded up to get to the venue.
We jumped out of the tram and rushed to the train station, finaly when the train arrived to the stop we were wondering how to find the building we needed. We were walking when Andrea asked some guy about the place and he poited us to the opposite direction.. Backt to where we came from..(lol) I once even went “look for a red bus” to the girls (lol) but of course when we got closer to the place, we noticed people, dressed up in visual kei, gothic and punk outfits going to the same direction so we were sure that it’s the way we need to be heading. And finally after some time of walking we spotted a car with Gackt’s photos all over it saying YFC, and of course the REDCAR bus (lol).
We were just about on time - 5pm..
I thought we’ll see a looooooong line of people going from the gates to the other side of the street, but there was just a messy crowd gathered together at the fence of the door.
There were couple of Japanese guys walking around with the YFC staff t-shirt. One filming the crowd from time to time and other with a camera, though I didn’t see him taking any photos.
I needed to find others in the crowd since they were quite ahead of us already, so after calling Suguru, I managed to find them, and surpisingly we were quite close to them, though they were standing at the fence.
When they opened up the door, everyone went nuts, yelling. It looked like they are going to get there with that fence..(lol)
Timi, Andrea and me were trying to stick to each other, and we were standing in the building after a couple of minutes. Sure, the first thing we did was - GOODS. We obviously annoyed the guy who was standing at the other side of the goods table because the list of the things was so long.. And he was standing with the “hurry up, and give me the money” face on. (LOL).. Andrea left quite a good sum of money to G, while me, I spent just about 20euros for a photobook and a key-ring. After that the only thing we needed was a DRINK, and QUICKLY! We bought some and moved to find the spot in front of the stage.
I was sort of surprised. The place for me looked bigger in the photos, but even standing at the very end of the building you could have a great view of the stage.
We “settled down” quite close to the middle but more close to the stage, though there were some taller people totally blocking the view to us. I could see just floodlights hanging on the ceiling above the stage. All the time before the concert started they were playing some sort of piano melodies that were totally out of the context for me and after a while hearing them I couldn’t stand them anymore..(lol )
In no time the “rude” G’s secretary spoke and I nearly died laughing my head off..(LOL) I still wonder who wrote the “speech” for him…Ahahahaha…. When we heard him again, it was a sign that the live is gonna start in 5 minutes, though I wasn’t really sure since G likes to make people wait and tease them, because he’s the master of the art of teasing =] However, the lights went down really quickly and we finally heard the music, the intro of ZAN, and soon the JOB showed up, the crowd went crazy… I don’t quite remember now but I think You and Chacha were the first ones, and everyone lost it when the man himself came on stage holding a katana. I could see him just perfectly when he got up to the platform. I was blown away, absolutely…I wasn’t sure that what I see is happening in front of my eyes or it’s just an illusion in my head, I couldn’t take my eyes off him, from the very first second you could feel his charm.. It was when the magic started and it totally changed me into something else. I broke the light stick and girls around me looked like “wtf? Where that blue light is coming from” (lol)… I didn’t really cared about anyone being crazy around me because I just got into it myself together with the first lines of the Zan I lost it and went crazy jumping to the air with my hand up. I felt like I had to get myself out of my own skin for the man on the stage, I surrendered to the crowd and to the power Gackt sent to the audience and went with it all the way possible. Me and the girls got separated in a progress of the concert and soon I was standing around people I didn’t know, and really not even bothering myself about that fact, though I’m always shy and cold being around strangers. Gackt managed to make me go over myself and just be wild. I was singing along and jumping all the time but still not being able to move my eyes away from him not even for a moment, it was something I’ve never ever felt before, I was out of the normal world to the world of his, and totally giving myself to it. He looked million times more gorgeous than on any magazine cover or video, and I’ll go with Timi’s words that Photoshop can go and fuck itself, because it can’t get anyone even close that beautiful as Gackt actually is.
People were following his moves, shouting in response. The MAN was already all wet from sweat and you could see every inch of his chest through the shirt after a couple of songs more. The heat was killing everyone at it’s highest when he started to be all touchy to himself driving the crowd even more wild and hot by puling up his shirt with his hand, which found the way up his hips and finally stopped on the shoulder, of course his hips moves just added to that…I was all “DAAAAARN….” and just responded with his moves with a yell. I think it must have been during Speed Master or Nine Spiral. Seeing THAT in front of your eyes, makes everything to boil even more than watching on a DVD…*_*
Finally when I heard the inrto of Luna, I wanted to dance badly but there was a bit too little of space, though I still managed to move the hips together with him. I love the song soooo freaking much…..Of course when I finally saw him taking off the tie…..*_* I was like “oh god…” and he just went ripping off his shirt, I even saw one of the buttons flying to the audience when he tore it to the sides, though I have no clue where it landed. Everyone in the audience just went mad, screaming, yelling and clapping, it was overwhelming. He couldn’t go without the “fakfakfak” and I almost went headdesking, but I loved it, everyone around - too.. (lol)
I was standing quite close, I could see him pretty well, could see even sweat drops falling off his body and his glance was strong. I “met” his eyes quite a few times but one of them he kept staring and I was like staring back. He had that “killer glance” on and it looked like he was trying to make me look away, but I fought back with the same killer look of mine.. And it seemed like he gave up….(LOL) However, this can be just an imagination of mine because there were people around me, in front of me and behind me, so I could get things wrong a few times…
His glace is really powerful and makes you numb, it’s piercing and strong, like of an eagle, hunting in fields.
The concert was reaching the middle of it. It was hella hot, I pulled up my tank top so more of the skin is bare. I got a few fresh air waves from somewhere on the other side a few times during the concert and breathed it deeply and thought that there’s no way I’m gonna faint nor feel weak and I didn’t…I catched up Chacha with my eyes a few times, he was soo charming and so smiley, totally owning his guitar, and sometimes even being quite sexy with little pointing to the audience and kissing a guitar pick before throwing it to the crowd. Chirolyn scared the crap out of me with all that make up and his face. (LOL) He looked like an evil clown from some horror movie. Ahahaha…
Gackt was starting to look dizzy, but his singing of Mind Forest was fabulous, even though I couldn’t catch much of the worlds I absolutely enjoyed the ones I did catch. From time to time he would get dizzy from yelling and stagger while standing. But when the intro of EVER started he began to shake all his body with his hand up (and yeah, you could see every muscle of his, shalking, the manboobies of his, that we love so much.. lol), everyone followed him and he seemed satisfied, smiling naughtily. I was also dancing and singing along as much as I could.
Song after song he got dizzier and dizzier and he looked confused time after time. And it started to worry me….Every time it happened and he started staggering, my heart stopped for a moment I was scared that he might pass out and get hurt. Things gotten even worse when he lost consciousness again before he could realize that, and kind of lost his balance, the sweat around on the stage added to that and he fell of the stage right into the left side, into the hands of the girls..I stopped breathing, and there were already tears in my eyes, I was holding my light stick in front of my face, with my hands clasped, all shaking, and all I saw of him was confused face, and then he just flashed an adorable smile. At that moment I totally….He was giving himself all, yelling his soul out, passing his own energy to us and it knocked him out… But instead of giving a weird face he flashed that gorgeous, even though little weak, and maybe confused, smile, he still had strength to do that…
Staff members helped him to get on the stage again. I think they had the light to go off as they tried to get him back to the reality brushing the sweat off his body with the towels. Everyone around started cheering, calling his name, I think at least most of the people knew that just us at this point could give him away our strength and we all did our best. I hardly could hold back my tears….
When he started singing Flower, and his voice got to me, I couldn’t take it anymore, I was trying not to cry, but after a moment I told myself “Hell that….” and burst out into tears. I kept on singing with him. Huge tear drops were rolling down my cheeks, but I kept on smiling. I couldn’t feel sad in any way, it was happiness.. I was out of my own body.. Sometimes I was just standing there numb with my hands on my face and the blue light from the light stick getting to my eyes and thanked him over and over and over again..And sometimes trying to over yell him while singing along and wanting to say with his own song lyrics’ that’s he’s just irreplaceable for me and that whatever happens I’m gonna follow him through his worst and best days, because it’s the least I can do for him.
I couldn’t stop crying all the way to the other songs. I was still in tears when he finished. Through that I can hardly remember but I was just standing there crying with a smile on my face when he looked around the audience down and again it might be just my blown out brain playing, but at that moment when my eyes met his again, he reached his arm with a hand put to fist and that comforting face as if saying “Thank you”…..
I couldn’t even understand the fans fighting for a drumstick…..
I know, I might sound pretty dramatic here, but it was mind blowing for me, plus it was the first concert in my life… I don’t remember much of it, because I guess I was too much into it and just wanted to feel every second there and then.
When the concert ended I was sort of calmer but after I found Timi and Andrea and exchanged some words with them, I started crying again….*Sorry, girls!* When I met up Lisa with Suguru, we hugged, and I saw that her mascara leaked away, she cried too.
I wasn’t the only one crying there, he touch so many people. He said some nice words about us all being the family because we’re all here, that he’ll always be there for us no matter how difficult the journey gets. Also he said he’ll never forget THAT night, and promised to come back, he called us all brothers and sisters, said that he loves us all. His English was perfect for me and voice sounded so magically when he spoke even though you could notice that it was kind of worn out and exhausted. We all promised to wait for him and come to see him again.
Also I don’t quite remember now what the song that was but Gackt went up to Jun-ji and started playing the drums with one hand while singing!^_^
He enjoyed hearing his name and yellings, and had that “arrogant” posture of his from time to time, sometimes pointing to himself and going “ore” with his lips trying to make the audience yell louder. And of course couldn’t go without asking how much we all wanted to fuck him…(LOL) And apparently everyone liked that idea.(LOL)
Some people were taking photos right in front of his face which looked really rude to me, I even tried to block the view for one of them with my hand.

When everything was over, we all noticed that it’s raining outside. I was saying to myself that even the sky in Munich was moved by Gackt’s mind, heart and his dedication, that it couldn’t hold back not raining. My tiredness from before the concert went away somewhere I was full of energy, Gackt shared his with all of us, and I felt it.

We went to the fast food place and sat there for a while, Suguru and Lisa ordering some food and the rest of us just doing nothing and trying to figure out what had just happened.
When we finally reached the hostel and got to the rooms I couldn’t sleep, we talked a little and then I just moved to the other place in the room, sat in front of the desk in silence for 4 hours with my brain totally numb and stunned, until the time for me to get ready for the leaving came.
I wanted to leave without anyone noticing but Lisa and Suguru insisted not to sleep too and sent me off to the train station. I really miss them already. They are one of those that you can count on. Lisa being sweet, caring and heart-worming, and Suguru being all gentleman, funny, nice and helpful. I don’t really know what I would have done without them. I must be thankful to Gackt for making me to come to Munich, because I met some of the most amazing people there, including Timi and Andrea. *<3*

All the way to the airport I listed to Flower. I couldn’t get him and the concert out of my head and all the way back to Lithuania I was thinking and thinking, thanking to him and wishing him best and every time I was tearing up getting the flashbacks, until I finally was knocked out by my brain for sleep at the bus going to my town and woken up just before we entered the road of it.

I woken up today at 4pm with a sore throat and body like it was hit by the truck. My feet are looking miserable, and I don’t feel too well, but I don’t care at all, it was an amazing experience, something beyond this world and my mind and one of the most cherished moments in my life that will give me strength to move forward every time when I feel like I can’t take it anymore, my inspiration, and, yes, you can call me stupid, or crazy, but it will be my faith in the impossible. Even now writing it I get all emotional and tears make my eyes blurry…

I am proud of being a fan of his and I will continuing to follow our beloved moon as long as I can and as long as he’s here.
P.S. I'm sorry if there's something not right in this, but my memories are still quite messy, and I can't remmeber it all. Besides it was just my OWN impession so.....Anyway I hope those who actually read it, enjoyed! ^_^