Title: Fields of Gold
Authors: Deans Dark Dream
Pairings: Dean/Sam
Rating: NC17
Warnings: Based on a RL love story. Slash, rimming, hummers, love.
Disclaimer: I don't own Dean, Sam, Cas or Adam.
Summary: Dean and Sam celebrate their first anniversary as a couple. They also face the one year mark after Sam's attack. Max comes into his own as an artist and deepens his relationship with Cas. Adam makes amends with Dean and Cas.
A/N: Saddle up my friends, it is going to be a wild ride! Love DDD
Fields of Gold
Part Ten Continued
Wednesday was the one year anniversary of the day that Sam and I had decided to become a couple. I'd been thinking about what to do for a while, and had all the arrangements made. I snuck home a little early to finish up some last minute stuff, and was just closing the front door behind me when Sam came around the corner from the hall with a wooden spoon in his hand.
"What the hell are you doing home?" he asked, pointing the spoon at me as we stared at each other in surprise.
"I could ask you the same question," I replied testily, putting my hands on my hips. "You're not supposed to be home until six tonight. You said so this morning."
He glanced down, then back at me and started to laugh. "I just wanted you to not rush home so I could get dinner ready."
"And I came home to put the finishing touches on my surprise.” We stared at each other for a moment. "But it doesn't matter. We'll eat your dinner, and then do my surprise."
I love lamb chops, and Sam had done them up with fresh green beans, baby carrots, and sliced tomatoes, accompanied by a marvelous chardonnay. He had set places at our little table on the patio, and we ate out there as evening fell. The day had been warm, and as the sun went down, it cooled off just enough to be comfortable. The air was still, and as we sat there quietly, a coyote trotted across a corner of the pasture, getting a vigilant look from Xia.
Samt lit candles as it got darker, scooting his chair around next to mine as we enjoyed the last of the wine. He brought my hand to his mouth and kissed my knuckles.
"Do you remember that morning you called me to come over? Your voice was all shaky, and I asked if you were all right. You sounded so upset that I was sure you were going to tell me that you were in love with Sky, and that we were through."
I had turned to look at him while he was speaking, and as he finished, he met my eyes. We stared at each other for a long moment, each of us remembering that day clearly. I smiled, nodding my head slowly as I squeezed his hand.
"No.” I paused and slowly shook my head. “I was so sure about what I wanted, and so afraid that by then you’d lost interest, or changed your mind, or some other damn thing. You took so long to say anything that I almost died waiting."
We watched the sun narrow to a sliver as it dropped behind the trees, briefly lighting the sky. Sam was looking at the sunset, and I was looking at Sam. The golden light turned his skin a deep honey brown, and I felt a surge of emotion so strong that it caught my breath for a second. I reached up and ran my fingertip across his mouth, then down his chin until I could hook my finger under his chin and turn him to me.
I studied his face carefully, noting the lines around his mouth that hadn't been there eight years ago. His eyes hadn't changed much, except for the little fan of wrinkles at the corners; they were still green, blue, gold and liquid, regarding me with a somber expression. He leaned his face into my hand as he held my gaze.
"I love you, Sam."
He finally smiled back at me. "I know you do, baby. That's maybe the one thing in my life that I never doubt."
He leaned over and kissed me slowly, running his tongue along my mouth and sending little trickles of heat to my cock. I slid from my chair and knelt between his feet, gripping his thighs as I buried my face in the crotch of his jeans and blew a warm breath through the fabric. When I did it a second time, and then a third, Sam dropped his head back with a groan. As his cock thickened, I opened his pants and reached in to straighten it up towards his belly, but left it in his shorts.
I rose up a little to lick my way up his stomach, teasing him with nibbles and kisses. As I pushed his shirt higher, I glanced up to see him watching me with a smoldering expression, his jaw tight and his eyes narrowed. I sat back on my heels to unbutton my shirt, pulling it wide to stroke my hands down my body, ending with one hand gripping my crotch. I lifted the other to my mouth, sucking on my index finger before reaching it slowly out to him. He watched it coming, lowering his gaze as my wet fingertip made contact with his nipple. He drew a quick breath at the coolness of it, and his cock flexed in his underwear.
The tip of his erection strained against the waist of his shorts as I mouthed him though the thin fabric. Sam pushed his jeans and shorts down a little to lift his cock and balls up over the elastic. He dropped a hand to the back of my head as I sucked down his erection. The taste and smell of him hardened me quickly, and I ripped open my fly with a moan, grabbing my cock in one hand as I reached for his nuts with the other.
As I blew him, Sam put his hands on my shoulders, holding me lightly as he watched. Before long, he began to thrust quickly, arching back as he pumped out most of his hot load onto my hand. I kept hold of him as I stood up, jerking my cock and grimacing as the pressure in my nuts increased. Sam scooped some cum off his belly and began to knead my balls, sliding them around in his slippery hand. A few seconds of that finished me, and he grinned as I sprayed his chest with strings of ejaculate, each one accompanied by a soft grunt as I panted through it.
We wiped up with our dinner napkins, and put ourselves back together as we settled into our chairs again. Sam put his arm over my shoulders as I leaned my head into his. We sat like that for a long time with full stomachs and happy hearts.
At eight, I ran upstairs to check on things, and then came back down for Sam. As I led him along the hall to our closed bedroom door, he looked at me curiously. He was always surprising me with wonderful experiences, so I had really worked at thinking this one up. I reached for the knob and turned to watch his face as I pushed the door open. His eyes went quickly around the room as his face broke into a delighted smile.
"Arabian Nights?" he asked in a goofy accent.
"Something like that," I agreed.
I’d arranged to have our room swathed in yards and yards of jewel-toned fabric with tassels everywhere. A satin canopy hung from the ceiling, draping the bed in deep crimson. The room looked like the inside of a sheik's tent with dozens of candles flickered in the breath of air from the open window. As we stepped inside, two hot-looking guys dressed only in crimson jocks stepped out of the shadows.
Now I have no idea what sheiks wear under their robes. I expect it isn't a crimson jock, but I’d asked for two scantily clad sensual masseurs, and this was what they sent me. On these two it worked, believe me. Sam rolled his eyes to me, and I grinned back.
They led us to massage tables set up head to head near the big window that overlooked the back meadow. The sky was clear and full of stars, and we lay on our stomachs holding hands as we were kneaded and pummeled. The boys rubbed and pressed their crotches against us as they leaned into the massages. It was as intimate and calming as I'd hoped, and I felt myself drifting away in a cloud of champagne and scented massage oil, Sam's hand warm in mine.
But these were to be sensual massages, and eventually my masseur began to concentrate on my ass, stroking his hands up my crack, over and over, so that the sensation was one of endless touch. He nudged my legs apart, reaching deeper to grasp my testicles in both hands, compressing them in his palms. As he tugged and squeezed, he slid a thumb up and into me, moving it just enough to keep my attention. As I arched up into his hands, Sam's tightened grip and low moan told me something similar was being done to him.
They didn't get us off. I'd instructed them to stop short of that. After they'd gotten us close a few times, they led us to bed, blew out all but a couple candles, and left. Max's drawing crossed my mind as Sam pushed me onto my side and wrapped his arm around my chest, pulling me into the curve of his body. Being held like that is the most secure feeling in the world, and I wasn't surprised that Max had depicted himself in that position.
We dozed for a while, and when I woke up around eleven-thirty, Sam was already awake, lying on his side with his head resting on his outstretched arm. When our eyes met in the dim light, his mouth moved in the faintest of smiles. His hand was resting on my chest, and I covered it with my own as I looked at him.
"Make love to me," I whispered to him in the stillness of the room.
He didn't reply, but his expression softened and in it, I could see the same tenderness and devotion that I felt for him. We lay quietly for several minutes, gazing at each other, my hand still over his on my chest. Just when I couldn't stand it another minute, his hand began to move. He drew his fingers in and then spread them back out slowly, his thumb brushing across my nipple each time.
He watched me carefully as he intensified the movements of his hand, and when he pinched my nipple the first time, I cried out. His face tightened, his cock jerked against my leg, and he covered my mouth with his, smothering my next cry as he kissed me deeply.
We took our time, touching each other's bodies with hands that slowly grew more urgent. Sex with someone new is exciting and I love it, but making love with a person you know well and love deeply is amazing. Sam knew my body intimately, and used that knowledge to bring me close with his hands and mouth. After my nuts tightened up for the third time, I was panting and moaning and begging him to fuck me.
He scooted up to my ass, his knees spread wide around my hips, and I felt the wet tip of his cock press firmly against me. I pulled my knees to my chest and groaned aloud when he finally began to push into me. He stopped with just the head of his penis in me, and waited until I looked up at him.
"I love you, Dean," he whispered to me as he ran his hands up my body, then back down to hold my thighs. As he pulled me onto his cock, he held my eyes. "I love you," he said again, so softly I could barely hear him.
That night a year ago when we'd decided to become partners, I'd never been in love before and hadn't realized how my feelings for him would deepen over time. It had only been a year, and already our relationship had evolved and matured; I couldn't imagine my life without him. Watching him as he began thrusting steadily into me, the muscles of his stomach flexing with the effort, I knew that he and I shared something deeply intimate that many couples don’t find in their relationship.
He brought me to an intense climax before pulling free and straddling my waist. I rubbed his hard dick in the cum that covered my belly, and then stroked him as he squeezed his balls in one hand. Each time my fist slid over the head of his cock, he let out a soft, incredibly sexy grunt little 'unh,' 'unh,' 'unh's’ that grew louder and more frequent the closer he got to shooting. In just moments, he rose to his knees; his entire body tense as he fired onto my chest and stomach, grunting each time his cock spurted.
When he gained some control over his body, he lay down next to me, his ragged breathing slowly becoming more regular. His hand slid up and down my arm, tugging at the hairs on my wrist, stroking his fingers between mine. He was quiet for quite a while, but finally he rolled to me, taking my face in his hands, talking softly to me from five inches away.
"Dean, your love is the most wonderful gift anyone's ever given me. It makes me strong, and it keeps me humble, and I love you so much."
Of all the things he'd said to me over the past year, these words touched me the most. I reached out to cup his cheek in my hand and we kissed then a soft, searching kiss, his lips warm on mine a kiss that held all the wonder and awe we felt for what we became when we were together.
The gymkhanas grew more popular each month. July was the fourth one and we had to cut back on the number of events to fit all the contestants in. They were paying for themselves now, which was all I'd been aiming for. I viewed them more as public relations events and something fun for the local kids.
Kelly won the ring toss on Rascal, getting all five of his rings on the poles in the quickest time as he cantered along. Kelly was doing well under James's watchful eye. He was strong and durable, and worked hard at whatever was put in front of him. After a month of extra meals, both he and Rascal had put on several pounds and looked healthier. He'd gotten a lot more comfortable around the barn, and grinned at me whenever I came across him.
Katie came home first in the water bucket race, soaking wet and grinning all the way. She and Xia were quite a team, and I was starting to believe she could do damn near anything on a horse. She was beginning to get Kahn over fences consistently, learning to control his moods and his temper.
Max spent the day in the announcer's booth since Cas was on a horse-buying trip. I don't know if it was his artistic streak or what, but he was a great announcer, adding all sorts of silly comments and little jokes. He went out into the crowd at lunch, doing impromptu interviews with the kids and their horses. He'd make up a goofy voice for each horse, and it was pretty funny, a side of him I hadn't seen. He was becoming a very confident person not just because of Sam and me, I don't think but also thanks to Cas, Katie, David, and all our other friends. They'd given him back the free spirit that had been quashed for so many years.
The crew I'd hired to do work on the rodeo preparations was moving right along. Stout pens had been built off to one side of the western arena, with alleyways connecting them to the bucking chutes that were still being built. I’d watched the workmen one afternoon as they set massive timbers one after another, and then tied them together with 2x6s set a foot apart. It looked plenty strong to me, and I hoped it would look as good to my insurance guy, who had paled when I told him bulls were coming in September.
The promoter showed up again on the day of the gymkhana, taking a bunch of pictures that I began to see on posters around town and in an ad on the local TV channel. He dropped off a few posters at my office, and I put them up at the stable, figuring most of the rich owners would attend just for the novelty of it.
Zane had shown some interest in the tie-down calf roping event when I told him about the wild card entries. He hadn't roped seriously in years, so he'd started practicing daily, flinging his rope at anything that moved. It got so bad that we all began looking around corners before stepping out into the open for fear of getting lassoed. Luckily, his aim improved quickly, and he went to work on actual calves that he borrowed from the place we got the steers. Most afternoons, you could hear their bawls all over the property.
The horse really has to know what it's doing top notch roping horses sell for well into six figures. Cher wasn't that good, but she caught on quickly, backing up just enough to keep tension on the rope so that Zane could get the calf tied. He was having a good time with it, whooping and hollering every time he made a quick run.
I talked to Katie about the barrel racing. She was interested in at least giving it a try, so one day we set up the cloverleaf pattern in the arena, and she began trotting, then loping through it on Xia. We knew she wouldn't be competitive with the pros in so short a time, but I was going to run a novice division for the local girls, and she definitely had a chance there.
As I watched Xia swap leads coming around the final barrel, James walked past with Ginger on a lead rope, heading for the wash rack. I remembered Ginger had stopped on a dime that first time I'd ridden her and had a stock horse pedigree that just wouldn't quit; I had an idea.
"James, bring Ginger over here."
I waved Katie to the gate, and we tacked Ginger up with Katie's gear, then she climbed on. She'd only ridden Ginger a couple times, so we did a little flat work first, letting them get used to each other. Ginger eyed the barrels with interest, her ears forward. I hollered at Katie to circle a barrel the next time past, and when Ginger realized that's where Katie was aiming her, she took off like a rocket. Katie grabbed the horn and held on as Ginger dropped her shoulder into the turn, almost brushing Katie's foot on the ground before powering away toward the next barrel, clods of dirt flying out behind her churning rear feet.
Katie pulled her up partway to the barrel. "My god, she almost dumped me!"
"I think maybe we've got a ringer here. Take her down to the far end and make a run on her. Don't urge her at all. Let's just see what she does." As she trotted away, I added, "But hang on like hell."
As Katie circled to face the barrels, Ginger began to crab-step sideways, fidgeting with the bit, and tossing her head in her eagerness to go. Katie pointed her toward the first barrel and leaned forward. Ginger shot away like she'd been goosed, slowing at the last second to round the barrel, then sprinting toward the second one, doing a flying lead change halfway there. The second turn was as clean as the first, and then they were pounding toward the last barrel.
Katie had lost her hat on the second turn, and Ginger's ears were pinned flat to her outstretched head. As they straightened up from the last turn, Ginger went into a full gallop with no input from Katie, slowing only to avoid running through the arena fence. Katie trotted her back to me, her mouth open in wonder at the thrill of it.
"God, that was fun!" she yelled. "That's as cool as taking Kahn over a big vertical!"
"She's obviously done this before," I remarked, patting Ginger's warm neck. "But she hasn't done it in a while, so that's it for today."
We gave Ginger back to Tommy so she could have her delayed bath. Katie rode her daily from then on, and when I timed her the week before the rodeo, she was within hunting distance of the pros that'd be here soon. Now it was even more of a mystery why someone had so badly neglected a horse of Ginger's caliber and training.
Chris's and Sam's birthdays were later that week, so of course we threw a party. I had a big tent erected down by the creek, hired a company to roast a pig, dug horseshoe pits, marked out a diamond for softball, and invited everyone I could think of.
Sunday was warm with big puffy clouds that gave an occasional break from the sun. Flex and Xia were still at Castlewood, so we opened the gate to the pasture and let everyone park there. Close to a hundred people showed up everyone's parents, all our friends, most of my employees. Jesse and Ben drove over for the day, and even Adam made an appearance.
He looked good, leaner than the last time I'd seen him, and his hair was buzzed. He greeted me with a hug and a kiss, and seemed friendly and relaxed. I saw him now and then throughout the afternoon, finally catching up with him as he sat out a round of horseshoes. He was sitting in the grass watching as I sat down beside him with two cold beers.
"Thanks." He glanced at me, and then looked out across the meadow. "I need to apologize to you, Dean. I was a real shit the last time I saw you."
"Apology accepted." I looked down at my beer, rolling it between my hands as I continued. "Can you tell me what was bothering you back then? It really hurt that you wouldn't talk to me."
He heaved a big sigh, and was silent for a few moments. "I was jealous of what you had with Sam." He held up his hand to silence me as I looked up quickly. "Not that I wanted to be with you myself, but that you'd found someone that you could have that kind of relationship with. You looked so fucking happy."
"I was. I still am."
He smiled. "I know, and I'm happy for you, both of you . . . honest, but it made me realize that I really didn't feel like that about Cas, which made me feel guilty because I know he cared a lot for me."
"He loved you," I told him quietly.
He glanced at me. "I know." Adam sighed again, softer this time. "I knew it wasn't fair to keep seeing him, and then after I broke up with him, I had to stay away for a while, to get over him. I missed you guys a lot." He waved it away with a swing of his bottle. "Anyway, I'm sorry. I was really glad when I got your invitation so that I had a reason to come out here."
"Adam, you don't need a reason or an invitation, for Christ's sake!"
"You know what I mean." He dropped his arm over my shoulder and pulled me to him. "So Cas's still seeing Max?"
"Yeah." Just the thought of them made me smile. "They're really good together. Max needs someone sensitive and gentle, so Cas is perfect for him. And Max's real affectionate, which Cas loves."
"Sounds like a match made in heaven," Adam said lightly, but I knew it bothered him still. We went on to talk about our families, catching up on various happenings. Our relationship had changed in the months we'd been apart, and as we talked, I realized that I would never sleep with him again. We would be friends and family forever, but our time of being lovers was over.
I watched him as he talked, thinking about all the things we'd shared. Our fumbling teenaged jerk-off sessions, that first miraculous time of sliding my dick into his virgin ass, our companionable evenings on the couch. He turned to me and stopped talking when he saw my expression.
"What?"
I smiled and hugged him. "Nothing. I'm just glad we're friends again."
He smiled back, a rueful one-sided smile that made him look twelve years old. "Me, too."
I saw him a little later speaking with Cas. As I watched, Cas pulled him into a hug, which Adam returned and they stood there for a long moment, wrapped in each other's arms. Adam was making up with everyone today, it seemed. He found me a while later to say goodbye, thanking me for the invitation, but claiming he had an evening's worth of work to get through before Monday morning. I watched him go, pleased that we had patched things up somewhat.
Jesse turned out to be the home run king, smacking the ball almost to the far fence a few times. David had a dead eye in the horseshoe pit, scoring enough ringers to have people shaking their heads in admiration. Bonnie had a great time galloping around the field with the other visiting dogs, all of them ending up in the creek periodically to cool off. It seemed like the whole pack of them waited to shake until they were in the middle of a crowd of people, scattering shrieking women in all directions.
In the late afternoon, we demolished several pigs, roasted in a pit in the meadow until they were falling apart. After dinner, families started leaving, taking home cranky children and tired dogs. By eight, it was down to just us boys, so we went up to the house and sprawled in and around the hot tub.
David leaned across Gabriel who was on my left to ask me, "What are you doing about 'Full Moon'?"
I frowned at him. "'Doing' about it? Nothing, it's sitting on the mantle. What do you mean?"
"What's 'Full Moon'?" Tay asked from across the tub.
David ignored him as he shook his head. "Max didn't tell you, did he?"
"David….." Max said in a warning tone.
I was clueless and must have looked it. "Tell me what? What are you talking about?"
"What's 'Full Moon'?" Ben asked from my other side.
David ignored him, too. "We sent it out for framing, and while it was at the framer's, a collector from Chicago saw it. He was in town for a show at the museum. The framer knew it was a gift, but the guy bugged him enough that he finally called me." He paused as he met my eyes. "He offered me $25,000 for it. Said he didn't care that the artist was unknown, he had to have the drawing."
My eyebrows were somewhere in my hairline as I stared at him. "Twenty-five grand?" I swung my head to Max, who just shrugged.
"What the hell is it?" Jesse demanded.
David glanced at him. "A drawing Max did for Dean and Sam. You haven't seen it, huh?"
"No one has," I replied. "We haven't had anyone over since he gave it to us."
"You need to get it insured," David advised. "If that one guy wanted it that badly, no telling what it would go for at auction."
"I'm not going to sell it," I said indignantly, as Sam's hands tightened on my shoulders.
"I know that, Dean," David replied with the exaggerated patience you show a slow three-year-old. "My point is that it's an asset that needs to be appraised and added to your homeowner's insurance."
"One of Max's drawings is worth $25,000?" Tay asked.
"Apparently so," I answered.
I pinched the bridge of my nose and narrowed my eyes at Max, who was suddenly fascinated with the hairs on Cas's leg.
"Max sold a painting for $25,000?" Zane asked as he came back from taking a piss.
"Good god," I muttered in exasperation. "No, he didn't."
"Let's go see it." Gabriel this time.
Finally, it became easier to announce a trek to the house to view the drawing than it was to correct all the misinformation flying around. We climbed out of the tub, dried off, and pulled our shorts on. I sent Max ahead to turn on lights, and so that he could see everyone's reaction when they first saw 'Full Moon.'
Appreciation of art is truly in the eye of the beholder, and it's always interesting to watch people view a piece you yourself are already familiar with. As they came into the room, faces filled with expectation softened into expressions of delight and amazement that 'our' Max had produced such a fabulous portrait.
The power of the drawing was such that it made couples reach for each other. Sam had reached for me that first night, and now Jesse stepped behind Ben, looping his arms around Ben's waist to gaze over his shoulder at 'Full Moon,' their faces close as Ben leaned back into him.
Chris put a big hand on the back of Zane's neck as his eyes ran over our naked bodies. Zane stepped closer to pull Chris's arm down across his chest. Chris was quiet while the others were commenting on how detailed it was, how the light was just right, how it captured us so perfectly.
Tay was the last one through the door. He was laughing with Gabriel as he looked up at the drawing. He sobered quickly and his laughter died as he walked slowly forward. He stared at the drawing for several moments, and then looked to me. His expression had a hunger to it that I hadn't seen before, and we stared at each other across the room until Gabriel said something to him.
Cas had walked to the window and was gazing out into the night, his back to us. Max looked at him occasionally as he answered questions about the drawing. Chris glanced at Cas also, then to Max. When his eyes came to me and held, I realized that he understood what was going on with the four of us. He looked away from me as Max walked to Cas, touching his shoulder tentatively. They spoke for a moment, then Cas walked over to us with his arm over Max's shoulder.
"Can you do something like that for me and Zane?" The deep rumble of Chris's voice made us all turn to him.
Max looked at him and nodded. "Something like it, yes. And I won't charge you twenty-five grand for it, either," he added with a smile.
Without looking away from the drawing, Chris replied, "I'd pay it."
Max stared at him for a moment, and then looked back to the drawing. In his face was the realization, finally, that he was a gifted artist. He hadn't really believed it before, but now, with 'Full Moon,' I could see that he understood what it meant to be able to create something that moved people so deeply.
Early on the morning of August 22nd, I awoke to an empty bed. I sat up, listening carefully, but I couldn’t hear Sam in the bathroom, so I got up and walked quietly down the stairs and along the hall. The den is always the first place I look, and there he was, settled into the oversized chair in front of the window, wrapped in a quilt. The sky was beginning to lighten, and I could just make out his features from the doorway.
It had been a year to the day that Sam had been attacked. I'd been wondering what affect, if any, today would have on him. I'd been nervous just thinking about arriving home tonight, wondering if everything would be okay. It's foolish to think that something awful would happen on the exact same day, but still, I'd been dreading that first look down the hall to where I'd seen his torn shirt laying.
Sam's head was dropped back against the chair as he gazed out into the early dawn. His face was expressionless, and I wouldn't have known anything was wrong except for the rhythmic clenching of his fist in the folds of the quilt where it lay across his leg. I watched him for a bit as the room slowly brightened, wondering what to say, how best to assure him that today was a day like any other.
Except we both knew it wasn't.
He heard my sigh and turned, his intense eyes meeting mine for a long moment before he held out a hand to me. As he pulled me onto his lap, he held his nuts up out of the way so my butt could slide down between his thighs to rest on the cushion. I scooched down a little more and leaned back so that I could slide my arms around his waist with my head on his chest. He snugged the quilt around us and we settled against each other.
Neither of us spoke for a while, long enough for the sky to transition from almost-black through gray-pink, to pinky-gold, and finally to the palest of blues. Sam's heart thudded steadily against my ribs as the sun broke the horizon, turning the meadow into a glistening sea of dew.
"I don't think I can come straight home from work," he murmured to me. "Not tonight."
"Me neither," I agreed. "You okay?"
"Yeah, just kinda . . . I don't know. Not scared, really. Just……..."
His voiced faltered, and he was silent for a few minutes.
"I guess I am scared," he finally admitted softly.
I made a quiet sound of understanding. He rested his chin on top of my head and tightened his arms around me, sighing deeply. When he spoke again, his voice was just a whisper.
"Thank you for sticking with me when it got bad. I know it was hard on you." He paused. "I'm so sorry I hit you that night. I still feel terrible about that."
"It's okay, baby," I assured him. "That wasn't the worst part for me. I just felt so helpless. I didn't know what to do to make it better for you."
"You couldn't have done anything, Dean. I had to go through the whole process, I think, to really get over it. But the anger scared me; I've never felt like that. I wanted to hurt someone, and I was so afraid that it would be you. That I'd lose . . . just lose it and really hurt you." Another pause, then softly, "I couldn't have lived with that."
I tipped my face up to him and he kissed my forehead, then my closed eyes. As he worked his way to my mouth, I felt his penis stir against my side and I pressed into it as my own cock came alive. We kissed for a while, touching each other, letting the need build.
Sam ran his hand up my back, over my shoulder, and down my chest, tickling my nipple before flattening his palm on my stomach. The pressure of his hand as it slid across my hip and along my thigh, shortened my breath with anticipation. He stopped at my knee, holding me for a moment, and then moved up to take my cock in his fingers. The first time he brushed the pad of his thumb across my slit, I moaned into his mouth. His hand worked me gently, tugging and stroking until I was straining up into his tight fist, his grip slick with my precum.
Finally, Sam pushed me to my feet and led me up the stairs to our room. When we got there, he let go of my hand and crawled onto the bed, dropping spread eagled onto his belly right in the middle of the mattress. It was so like I'd found him a year ago that it shocked me for a moment. Then I realized that this was his way of dealing with it, of thumbing his nose at what had happened to him.
He'd been raped that day taken by force in an act of violence. Now he was offering me that very same act, but done with love, which made all the difference.
I was shaking a little as I crawled onto him, covering his body with my own. The mound of his ass pressed into my belly as I nuzzled his neck and shoulders, running my hands down to his. Our fingers gripped tightly at first, but I felt him gradually relax, his hands easing up on mine, his body softening under me.
I was silent as I moved slowly down his back, kissing his warm skin and licking along the knobs of his spine. His face turned to the side and I saw him smile as I sat up to move down the bed. I pushed his legs further apart as I knelt between his thighs.
I love Sam's ass and I don't get this opportunity as often as I'd like, so I took my time with him, dragging my thumbs up from his nuts, through the valley of his ass, to the base of his spine as my spread fingers sunk into the meat of his butt. Each time I slid across his hole, he'd moan softly and arch his back, coaxing me in.
I moved back slightly and dropped onto my stomach, keeping a hand on him as I got into position. The smell of him filled my head as I pressed my face into the crack of his ass, and we moaned in unison as my tongue teased him. I know that when he rims me, I never want him to stop, so I spent a long time there, licking him, kissing high inside his thigh, nibbling on his tightly-drawn nuts. When we were both humping the sheet, I crawled quickly up onto him, almost desperate to bury my cock in him.
I wasn't especially gentle as I entered him, I was too aroused for that, but he was ready for me, pushing back onto me with a force that got a grunt from both of us. I stopped then, gripping his hips to hold him still while I got myself under control. I know I think about things too much sometimes, but I couldn't help remembering the images from a year ago. Finding him tied to this bed, in this room, burned and bleeding, had been the most horrifying experience of my life, and as I straddled him, buried in his body, it all came back with a rush.
I leaned forward onto my hands, my breath coming short and quick, battling tears as my dick softened. Sam raised his head, and then sat up quickly, twisting to take me in his arms.
"Oh, Dean," he sighed. He lay back, pulling me with him. As his hands comforted me, he spoke softly. "I guess trying to ignore it isn't gonna work. Don't cry, baby. It's all over. We're safe here, just you and me."
I struggled to keep my voice even. "I'm sorry. I can't do this . . . not here, not today." I sniffed hard.
He was silent for a moment, his hand motionless on my back; then he sighed deeply. He put a finger on my chin, tipping my face until he could see my eyes. "I'm sorry, too, sweetheart. I guess this wasn't such a hot idea after all. Come on, let's try something else."
He climbed out of bed and tossed me a pair of shorts. Taking me by the hand, he led the way down the stairs, through the kitchen where Maria was starting breakfast, and out the back door onto the patio. I had no idea where we were going, and squinted in the morning light as we made our way through the garden. When we skirted the hot tub and turned down the little path to the cabana, I started to smile.
There was enough light coming through the closed blinds to see our way to the bed. He stopped there, turning to take me in his arms for a moment before he hooked his thumbs in my shorts and hauled them down. He left them around my ankles as his hands glided back up my legs to grip my ass. When he leaned forward and bit my thigh, I jumped and laughed nervously, then gasped as he took my soft dick into his warm mouth.
The change of scenery and Sam's aggressive playfulness did the trick. I hardened quickly, all the bad memories evaporating as he tugged firmly on my balls. I groaned deep in my throat; pain and pleasure so closely entwined as to be one and the same. After a few moments, he pulled slowly away, and I looked down to see a shimmering strand of saliva mixed with my precum connecting the tip of Sam's tongue to the tip of my cock.
As an arousing visual, it was right up there with the very first time I'd watched the tip of my achingly hard erection disappear into Sam's tight ass.
We both watched in fascination as he slowly moved further back. Finally, when it was about eight inches long, the glistening strand snapped.
"Oh, fuuuck," I growled. Something snapped in me also, and I pulled Sam up to me, kissing him hard, running my tongue around his mouth to taste myself in him. He felt my urgency and fell back onto the bed, ripping his shorts off as he drew his knees back. I didn't need an engraved invitation. I grabbed my dick and shoved it in, panting in my need to get inside him.
He grasped my legs, squeezing tightly, and I began to thrust with short, hard strokes that would finish us quickly. Our labored breathing filled the room, taking on a higher note as we both got close. Sam beat me by a few strokes, letting out a high keening sound as he climaxed, his cock dark and swollen in his tight fist.
As his body contracted around me, a hard orgasm jolted through me, leaving me shaken and trembling. Sam reached a hand around the back of my neck and pulled me down onto him, the puddles and splatters of his cum cool against my sweaty skin. As my cock softened and left him, he rolled us to our sides, raising his head to look at me.
"Feel better?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at me as his fingertip traced circles around my nipple.
"Yes," I sighed, wishing we could spend the day here, safe in this quiet room, naked and alone together.
He leaned down to kiss me. "Good, me too," he said as he rolled to his feet. We put our shorts back on, and reversed our earlier trip, nodding at Maria as we passed through the kitchen, ending up back in our room where we showered and got ready for the day.
We hadn't discussed our plans for that evening, but Chris called me around eleven and invited us to their place for dinner. From the tone of his voice, I realized that he knew what day it was, and I thanked him for his thoughtfulness.
"Well, I figured you guys might wanna get out of the house for the evening," he said. "Christ knows I'd want to, if it was me."
Sam and I met at their place. I arrived first and was seated on the back deck with a drink when Sam came around the corner of the house. Chris and Zane greeted him with warm hugs, and Zane kissed him thoroughly before releasing him to come to me. Sam held my eyes as he crossed the deck, knelt between my knees, and took my free hand in both of his.
"How was your day?" he asked me, searching my face.
"Uneventful. Yours?"
"The same."
We grinned at each other, and in that moment, everything was okay. The tension of the morning was gone, and we had a great evening with Chris and Zane. No sex although Zane groped me briefly when I passed him in the hall, just good food and intelligent conversation. We left around nine, Sam following me slowly through the neighborhood and into our well-lit garage.
Max and Cas were in the den, laying together on the couch watching TV, but we didn't join them. The bond between Cas and Max seemed to be gaining strength. Instead, we went up to bed, curling up together to talk about our day as we usually did. It was a nice, normal end to a nice, normal day, a day like any other.
The following Tuesday, Tay showed up later than usual, and seemed out of sorts, giving one quick nod to my cheery greeting. I held horses for him, a treat I allowed myself for having gotten all caught up on paperwork that morning. He worked silently through the first three, speaking only when necessary to instruct me to walk them out or turn them around. I put the third horse away, and when I came back empty handed, Tay frowned at me.
"Let's take a break," I said, taking his arm and leading him into the nearest tack room. He pulled away from me and walked to the window with his hands shoved into his pockets. I watched him for a few minutes, then stepped up behind him and rested my hands lightly on his shoulders. He tensed for a second, and then slumped against me, dropping his head back onto my shoulder with a gusty sigh.
"Talk to me, Tay," I said softly into his ear as I wrapped my arms around him.
He took a deep breath, and then raised his head. "I told my dad last night." His voice was rough with emotion, and he moved away from me as he continued. "He went nuts, like I figured he would. Told me I'd regret it my whole life." He sighed as he turned to look at me. "Sorry I was late today. He owns the building I live in, and he kicked me out this morning. I have to move all my shit by the fifteenth, so I was looking at apartments."
He scrubbed a hand down his face and rubbed his eyes for a moment, muttering, "Fuck," under his breath. I waited until he looked up again, and then went to him. He returned my hug, clutching me hard for a few seconds before easing off to hold me loosely; his forehead resting on my shoulder.
"I can solve your housing problem," I told him. "Move in with Sky and Gabriel. There's two empty bedrooms, and the place is huge. There's is plenty of room for the three of you."
He pulled back to look me in the face. "Yeah? God, that'd be great."
"You can use the horse trailer and a couple of the guys, like we did when Sam moved in."
"Man, that'll take the pressure off finding something quick. I only need it till the end of the month maybe."
"Well, move in, and if you like it, just stay. The house is a business expense cause Sky and Gabriel are employees, so no rent. Can't beat that."
"No shit, but I can't do that. I gotta pay you somethin'."
"Whatever." I waved my hand in the air before cupping the back of his head and leaning in to kiss him. I'd intended it to be a brief one, but he tightened his arms and pulled me to him, tilting his head for a better angle. His mouth was hot and hungry, and I was breathless with a thickening cock when he released me. I held onto him for a second as I got my balance and opened my eyes.
Tay was looking at me with the same hungry expression he'd had after seeing 'Full Moon' last week. His gaze followed my hand as I reached down to adjust my dick, and then came back up to meet my eyes. He was breathing hard through his slightly open mouth, his lips wet from kissing me. He looked absolutely delicious.
"Come home with me," I said to him, breathing quickly myself. "Stay the night."
Fields of Gold Part Eleven