Sickbay - (McCoy, Sulu)

[dctr_mccoy]

Leonard had just finished entering his notes for the day when he saw Sulu heading back into the relatively private area they'd given Pavel, trying to make him as comfortable as possible. The continued treatment of his burns hadn't been particularly easy to bear, so they wanted to ease his pain in any way possible, and it was agreed amongst the

Comments

[haroldlee]

You'd better be fucking hearing me right now. You can shut this off, but I can fucking barge through. Don't think I won't try.

Did you think because I was sleeping that I couldn't hear? That the horrible fucking shit you just said wouldn't make it through? Maybe that's what you wanted. You can be a real fucking child, Hikaru.

You think that you haven't been a fucking inconvenience to me, too? That you haven't taken my life and dumped it in a strange place and time with strangers who hate me and aliens who might kill me?

You think for one second that maybe I was happy to live with that, because I love you? And that even though my heart got torn out last night that maybe, just fucking maybe - you fucking asshole - that I still want you?

I'm almost there, Hikaru. Almost here.

[fencinginspace]

What the fuck was I supposed to say? What was I supposed to do? You told McCoy you wanted this shut off. Told him without me. You started it. I'm ending it.

You disappeared last night. I looked around and you were gone. Where the fuck have you been since then?

I don't want to hear this shit, Harold. Shut up. Shut up. I don't care where you are.

Hikaru tried to think of anything but McCoy, who he knew was waiting to intercept Harold. He wasn't feeling too charitable and didn't want Harold to have advance warning.

[haroldlee]

When he called your name, we weren't two people anymore. I couldn't take it. I didn't have any right.

He won't want me, Hikaru. I know that. It kills me.

I had to give that to you. I'm sorry, I am so sorry, but you are not going to throw me away like I'm nothing.

Harold barrelled toward the sickbay doors, completely unmindful of the blue-clad figure standing a lazy, crossed-armed sentry.

[dctr_mccoy]

"Woah, there, hold on," Leonard called out, his arms stretching out to grab the man running head-long into sickbay. "Stop, Harold!" he yelled, trying to get the man's attention, trying to get him to stop talking, yelling, whatever the fuck they were doing with their heads.

Holding him by the arms, he shook the other man. "You're not runnin' in there like a madman, you understand? I'm not letting you in until you settle down!"

His face was about as frustrated as Harold had probably ever seen.

[haroldlee]

Harold stopped, freezing against McCoy.

He looked up, a deceptive calm setting over his features.

"Man, I appreciate what you're trying to do here, but if you do not move at this moment, I will force my way into his head so hard that you'll be treating him for a massive fucking earbleed. Got it?"

[dctr_mccoy]

"And I appreciate what you're going through, really I do," Leonard said tightly to Harold, his own face impassive but his grip growing stronger, "but if you don't settle the fuck down, I'm gonna press this hypo so far into your neck, you'll still be feeling it next week," he growled.

He took a breath. This day was just getting better and better... "You're not fucking with my hospital, friend. If you want to go into my office with me, you need to back the fuck up, and walk in there with me like a man. That, or you two take it out here. But I've got patients in there and you're not bringing shit to my house. Got it?"

[haroldlee]

Harold clenched his fists, giving Hikaru a mental shove; no words, just a burst of hurt and anger.

"Fine. Fucking- whatever. Lead on."

[fencinginspace]

Hikaru could hear them arguing, and when Harold sent all that hatred his way, he felt it in his gut.

And then they were coming.

He steeled himself, standing up straight, his expression as neutral as he could make it, and crossed his arms over his chest. He knew that if Harold tried anything physical, he could take him--he wasn't worried about that. It just hurt so God damn much already. Inside.

He forced himself to meet Harold's livid gaze.

[haroldlee]

Harold, fists clenched, was purposefully rending open the skin of his palm with his fingernails.

"Hi. Your inconvenience is here to see you." Let me in or I'll force my way past, and you won't fucking like it, I promise.

[fencinginspace]

"Stop." Hikaru wasn't going to give Harold a word through their connection. "Stop that with your hands." He kept his voice calm, deliberate, not letting his emotions interfere. All he wanted was to go see Pavel again, God dammit, and to deal with this later.

"Why are you here?"

[dctr_mccoy]

Bones got them both inside his office and locked the three of them in.

"Alright, gentlemen," he said loudly. "I need both of you to sit so we can figure this shit out and get it done and over with. Sit," he repeated to Harold.

"Before anyone else says anything, know that if you get pissy, you're both out of here. Yes, Sulu, that means out of sickbay, and away from Pavel," he added. "Hate doing that to the kid, but I want this settled and quick."

[fencinginspace]

Hikaru seated himself again, deliberately placing a chair between himself and Harold.

"I'm calm," he said, and he was. Sort of. The fear of getting kicked out of sickbay because of Harold's temper did scare him a little. He would just focus on Pavel, though, and getting back to him, and everything would be all right.

He hoped.

[haroldlee]

Eyeing the gulf the chair made, Harold glared.

You will.

Harold might've clueless of how to close their connection, but he had some idea of what it would be like to force it wide open. The force of what he was sending was calculated and should've been enough to to give Hikaru a considerable migraine if he tried to deflect.

The look on Harold's face was unmeasurably angry, twisted in pain. "I won't let you throw me away. You've had every part of me. You said it yourself, you fucker - if we break this, it meant nothing. You are going to open your mind to me, right fucking now, even if it's the last time."

[fencinginspace]

"I'm not. Stop that--fucking hell, how do you expect me to talk to you if you're hurting me like that?" Hikaru couldn't help the outburst when Harold was banging on the doors of his brain like that.

He closed his eyes and tried to breathe, then spoke as deliberately as he could.

"You came to him first, Harold. I thought you wanted me gone. That you thought it would be the best thing for both of us." He opened his eyes again and when he looked at Harold, there wasn't the shooting, burning, twisting pain anymore, but a new kind. An ache that throbbed gently within his chest, the sort of ache a person has when he knows he has to break a heart.

"I need Pavel," he said, "I love him." He paused and pressed his lips together, not understanding why what he wanted to say next wouldn't fall off his tongue. 'I love you.' Say it. 'I love you, too.' It's not that hard. You've said it a thousand times already.

He caught Harold's gaze.

I love you.

[haroldlee]

I love you.

The dread washed over him. It wasn't his own; and then it was, too.

I'm so sorry. Please. I love him too. I don't want either of you gone.

I just want you to be happy and not hate me please fuck please

[dctr_mccoy]

"Cut it out," Bones snapped at both of them. "I'm in the room, and that's just rude. Now, tell me," he continued, "what's the verdict, fellows? Together, not together, partly together? It's one of those three, and I want some sort of resolution on this before we leave."