The Library News Bulletin

[daydreammuse]

Comments

[music_lover3]

Oooo, I like this!! It's good!! There's some grammar mistakes, but those can be fixed later. Good job!! Can't wait to read more of it!!

[daydreammuse]

I know! It's grammar hell, I admit! Very very rough draft, but wanted to post that moment.

[music_lover3]

That's all right. You should, it's good.

[daydreammuse]

Aw, thanks! Now send me your e-mail, so that I can send you soem finished stuff.

[astres]

I like it, too.

My only comment will be about the curse words. If you plan on getting published, you'll have to refine them, a lot. Or have one character who is just REALLY creative with them, so much so that they bring humour to the piece. Just to give you the heads up. :)

[daydreammuse]

I agree. They do seem a bit out of place and well I will be working on it. Thank you for your thoughts. I wanted to gather comments, as I am not used to these kind sof scenes and this sniplet is a part of a very important one, so I seeking for opinions.

[astres]

I've read that editors only keep the swears ie they are specifically warranted and they work well with the scene. So a climax in the argument or whatnot.

[daydreammuse]

I see the logic in that you know. I think that this will undergo major revisions, before an editor sees the book.

[ex_kaz_maho]

This is really very good. Apart from tidying it up for grammar, etc. - which you already know - I like the tension in this scene.

I must say that the final paragraph is one of the best pieces of prose I've seen you write. Excellent! :)

[daydreammuse]

Oh wow! Thank you! I'm flushed really. My grammar is a bit shaky on several occassions, but that is no excuse actually. Should have proofread.

[ex_kaz_maho]

Hey, give yourself a break! Your english is better than some writers who have it as their FIRST language... ;)

[daydreammuse]

That's true, but I prefer not to rely on that all the time. I'm thankful that people cut me slack about that since it's hard. *bows down in respect*

[fandoria]

That's some good progress you're making there. Keep up the great work!

Great teaser too. I like the voice and the tension and the imagery you created.

[daydreammuse]

Thank you! I can't believe I wrote that much for three months! Just so cool!