Comments | day_by_drabble: Blue Skies, prompt 13

shimotsuki in day_by_drabble

Blue Skies, prompt 13 | Invitation (Harry Potter)

Jul 30, 2011 18:47

Title: Invitation
Author: shimotsuki
Prompt: #13, Viva la Vida (Coldplay)
Fandom: Harry Potter
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Tonks; Remus/Tonks
Rating & Warnings: PG | angst, anger, and mild profanity
Word Count: 326 words
Summary: “Dear, why not come to dinner at the weekend, Remus and Mad-Eye are coming-” (HBP, chapter 5)

Author’s note: This may or may not be ( Read more... )

blue skies: prompt 13, fandom: harry potter, author: shimotsuki

Comments 11

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shimotsuki July 31 2011, 13:53:56 UTC

Thanks! I like the idea of her being angry (and worried) as much as sad; the failure to Metamorphose is then due to all the emotional strain rather than simply because she's moping/pining, because that's now how I see Tonks at all.

(The comment has been removed)

shimotsuki July 31 2011, 13:54:17 UTC

Aww, thank you.

mollywheezy July 31 2011, 17:36:20 UTC

I loved your reasoning for why Tonks wouldn't go to dinner. I don't think she was moping either, just in frustrated love. Maybe throwing a bowl of turnips at Remus' head would have gotten him to wake up sooner? I'm sure Molly would have understood . . . ;D Great drabble!

shimotsuki July 31 2011, 18:51:29 UTC

Thanks for the comments! I'm glad you thought this scenario worked.

The Great Turnip Cure? Hee! Too bad it didn't work on Percy at Christmas...

gilpin25 July 31 2011, 21:01:55 UTC

I'm sure I'd want to hurl a few turnips at Remus in Tonks's situation, and can certainly understand why Molly's well-meaning invite to dinner is almost rubbing salt into the wound. Having to pretend to be polite friends in public with someone you're having a million very personal arguments with is hardly the ideal cosy supper.

You've captured perfectly the complexity of her emotions at this point for me: anger, frustration and fear. I love her thoughts on Remus and what he can't hide from her, and the repetition of Nymphadora Tonks did not cry works so well in showing me how brave she really is.

shimotsuki July 31 2011, 22:45:29 UTC

Thanks for the comments. :) I'm glad the complex emotions make sense. And that's reassuring about the last line; I didn't want it to backfire and make it sound like Tonks was the type to cry easily!

scullyseviltwin August 1 2011, 02:12:01 UTC

You have such a knack for knocking the wind out of me with a few words. SUCH a knack.

This is perfect, and I mean that: ...even as he stared after her with an aching desperate hunger when he thought she couldn’t see. This is the exact sort of desperation that I keep ATTEMPTING to get but this... you just GET it.

shimotsuki August 1 2011, 02:53:44 UTC

No, no, no -- look at that, I flat-out used the word 'desperate', which was lazy as all get-out, heh. You totally get that desperation across in your stories without cheating!

But I'm grateful for your kind words, and glad you liked this.