Don't Judge A Book By It's Cover (part 24)
It had been 2weeks. Two weeks since I have had a decent night’s sleep. It was beginning to take its toll as 2weeks can be a very long time when you have nothing to do.
I tried writing but inspiration and motivation was at a low. I tried reading books but my mind trailed off elsewhere and the day time TV.....well....that just explains itself really.
My ankle had been making a recovery at a steady speed but not fast enough for me. I wanted to things, be productive like Dylan and Sian had been, to take my mind off things and keep it busy and distracted in the good way. Dylan and Sian had been getting on with their lives and trying to place everything back to where it was but every night seemed to be the same; chatting for a little while, have tea, then watch a movie until I fell asleep, which took longer every time. Sian always stayed by my side despite the fact that she had work early the next morning. Dylan however went to bed at a reasonable time. I think he thought that Sian and I would like some time to ourselves and in a way he was right, but Dylan is my best friend and I want to spend as much time with him as I can as well. But he seemed to have other ideas. Good or bad we just let him get on with it.
Sian and I had many convocations about it and came to the conclusion that distancing himself was his way of dealing with things - the man’s way.
“You excited about getting out and about again then Soph?” Sian asked excitedly.
“I guess”, I shrugged.
“Don’t be too overenthusiastic Soph, might break another limb”, Dylan joked.
“Oh harhar. Of course I wanna get out, it’s horrible staying inside all the time.”
“But....?”
“But I’m used to it now”, I smiled.
Dylan and I had practically moved into Sian’s place. Ever since that night Sian invited us round for a “comfort sleep over” shall we say, it was just easier for me to stay there and we both love Dylan so there wasn’t any point in him living away from us. I guess it gave us both a sense of security. Even though it wasn’t official, it still felt like home. Especially with my newly formed family.
“Well get un-used to it you lazy bitch! You need to get out” Dylan giggled.
“Why don’t we go out for a walk now then? As a trail run”, Sian suggested.
“Siiiaaan.”
“Soph, it will be good for ya!” Dylan said rather blunt, turning a blind eye to my tone as he came over to me at wrapped my arm around his shoulder. No matter how much I could have resisted, it would have been no use against Dylan’s muscles, which seemed to have increased significantly.....
“Dil, have you been working out?” I asked suspiciously.
“I’ve been to the gym a little lately, why?”
“You just seem more hench”, I replied, analysing the top of his arm and shoulder, squeezing it slightly.
“Any particular reason Dil?” Sian asked raising her eye brows along with a knowing look on her face.
“Because I want to?” Dylan replied innocently.
“Because you want to get on Jennaaaa! You want to loooove her, you want to kiiiiiss her, you want to hoooold her!” Sian started singing and jiggling about.
“Hey hey, no, Jenna is a great girl but...”
“Hmm? Hmm?!” I encouraged.
“Guys, this is meant to be about Sophie here, she’s taking a big step today!”
“Literally. Well...small baby steps at least eh Soph”, Sian winked.
Before I knew it, we were all outside; Sian and Dylan by my sides along with the crutches to assist me with my hobble.
I hated relying on other people or other objects to help me with the basic things in life! One thing that this has taught me is to not take the simple every day things for granted.
That went with a whole bunch of other things as well; not to take advantage of Dylan and Sian. They’re not always gonna be around for me. Even though I hope that they would be of course, you can never tell what the future is going to be like.
Like when you’re young and you say forever to the person you’re in love with and then a couple of months down the line and you’re not talking anymore? You thought you would have the whole world at your feet, you have all the time in the world but you don’t. You didn’t take that opportunity when you could have had it.
Look at me being all philosophical and deep; I definitely need to get into a better sleeping pattern again....
“You alright there babe?” Sian asked concerned.
Two weeks is certainly a long time. Sian and I had already come far in our relationship. We weren’t officially a couple or anything; we were happy the way we were but we kissed every now and again when no one was around and cuddled constantly and called each other little nicknames. Well...mainly Sian would do that but I liked it nonetheless.
“Yea I’m fine”, I smiled. “Just thinking.”
“About what?” Dylan asked.
“Where I would be without you guys”, I said in a sombre tone, looking down.
“Well you don’t need to! We’re not going anywhere”, Sian winked, kissing me lightly on the cheek. I leaned in slightly and closed my eyes enjoying the experience.
“You’re doing well Soph, wanna take a break?” Dylan suggested.
“Yea, that would be great actually”, I breathed out. I manoeuvred around as Dylan held onto my arm. “It’s alright, Dil, I’ve got it.”
“You sure?”
“I said I’m fine”, I shooed him away, more viciously than I intended.
“He’s only trying to help Sophie”, Sian pitched in.
“I don’t need any help okay!” I shot at her, instantly regretting it. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that-“
“No its okay, I know you’re frustrated”, Sian replied, looking down timidly, as she and Dylan sat beside me.
She had her hands tucked between her legs and attempted to get one out. I stroked it a little in reassurance but knew she was still hurt by my outburst.
“Ughr, I’m sorry Sian. I’m sorry to both of you. I’ve been nothing but a pain and I just want to get my life back. You’re right, I am frustrated. And angry and I just wanna get back at that bastard for putting me this way”, I tried explaining, looking at both of them.
At this mention, Sian and Dylan looked at each other with concern that didn’t go unnoticed.
“What? Has something happened to him?” I asked eagerly.
“No, we haven’t seen or heard of him”, Dylan muttered through gritted teeth.
“Why is that a problem then?” I questioned confused.
“It’s no problem at all Sophie”, Sian smiled, tapping my hand.
I trust Dylan and Sian with my life right now but I knew something wasn’t right.....
We didn’t stay out too long for it was getting slightly awkward after that little incident; none of us wanted to talk and there was that slight air about us that never usually happens. It only occurred at the very start when I had no idea about Sian.
When we got home, Dylan decided to go back to his for the night. Even though we had practically moved in together, it was rather hard spending most of his time with 2girls, especially when they’re being lovey dovey.
We understood that Dylan had lots of work to do and needed all the sleep he could get and since most of his belongings were elsewhere, it was pointless in wasting the space.
Once he had gone, Sian and I crashed on the sofa. I enjoyed the time we had together; we felt comfortable in each other’s company and we could do whatever we wanted. Not that there was much to do, just chat and cuddle which is what we were content with. For now.
“Sian, ya know I am actually really sorry about...losing it earlier”, I said timidly.
“Soph, you don’t have to apologise. I know you haven’t been getting any sleep lately. I don’t know what it’s like to be at home and not being able to do anything...”
“Home”, I smiled to myself.
“What?”
“I’ve said it in my head so many times but to hear you say it....makes it more special”, my smile increasing even more.
“Soph...”, Sian breathed a giggle.
“What?”
“You look like such a goon”, she replied, grabbing my neck and pulling me in for a hug and kissing my head repeatedly.
We were giggling and tickling each other slightly, like a romantic couple would do until we pulled away from each other. Sian placed her hand on the side of my face and kissed my nose.
We took a moment to look at each other for a while, just admiring the other, taking in everything they had to offer.
My eyes went droopy and slow but it wasn’t due to lack of sleep this time.
I went in to kiss Sian and she closed her eyes in anticipation. Our lips brushed against each other, making mine tingle. I kissed her once more, making the connection increase as I placed my hand on Sian’s waist and she placed hers back on my cheek again, breathing in.
We both exhaled as we could tell the heart rates were going up slightly. We kissed again and it had suddenly got more dramatic and there was a different sense in the air; a more passionate and driven one than there was just seconds ago.
Sian pushed into the kiss as did I. Our mouths opened more with each movement and I could tell Sian was inviting me for more. I didn’t do as I was told straight away; I thought I would tease her and make her wait and appreciate it more when that time actually comes but I wasn’t able to hold back for long and soon enough I crept my tongue onto Sian’s lips so she could have a taster what it was like.
Sian was craving for passion even though she tried teasing me herself, for her tongue reciprocated and made its way along mine, and I done the same. Our tongues collided together and were getting tangled up, almost the same state as our hands.
Sian’s hand had managed to reach to the back of my head, pulling me closer and mine was wrapped around Sian’s waist and back, pulling her body closer until her back arched and she was forced to lie down as I tried to crawl up her body so our faces her equal again. I managed to hook my finger in one of the loops from Sian’s jeans and used it to pull her closer as a moan came from the back of Sian’s throat, exhaling yet again.
I took my lip in my mouth, looking down at her and smiling as she done the same, but that smile quickly disappeared when I tried to continue to kiss her.
“Stop Soph”, she got up. Sian backed into the corner of the sofa as I had a confused look on my face. “We can’t do it like this.”
“Like what?”
“You with your leg and .... the state you’re in”, she said, breathing deeply.
“I’m in no state, Sian. I’m fine”, I tried reassuring her as well as myself.
“I mean your emotional state. You’re not getting enough sleep so you’re emotionally as well as physically drained therefore not knowing what you really want-“
“I know what I want. Sian, I want you. I love you.”
“I know you do Soph, but are you really meaning that or just saying it?”
“Sian....I can’t even believe you’re questioning this”, I said bemused, pushing myself onto the other side of the sofa, flinging my arms round the back.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I know what it’s like, Soph, you say all sorts when someone is drained. We need to do it right, yea?”
I swallowed a lump in my throat and took a second to compose myself for I knew Sian was right.
“Ya know I was thinking how far we had come today. How far all of us have come.”
“Yea?” Sian encouraged, shuffling closer to me.
“Yea”, I replied dreamily, looking up remembering. “I kind of remember the first time I saw you. How much I analysed you-“
“And freaked me out?!” Sian giggled.
“Yea! I hated you so much then.”
“Steady on Soph, don’t give too much away”, Sian winked.
“I know, but c’mon, you hated me too right?”
“I didn’t actually no. I thought you were gorgeous”, she said simply.
“What? Why were you all sceptical about me then?”
“Because you were a complete stranger, I had no idea who you were and....it was more fun that way”, she shrugged, perking her lips up.
“Yea well ..... okay I’ve gotta admit, it was rather funny”, I came out with as we both went into giggles.
I shuffled closer to Sian as she raised her arm for me to go under and I instantly wrapped my arm across her belly.
We spent the rest of the night going through every single detail that we both remembered and we both triggered other details from each other, giggling at how we were despite the fact that it wasn’t that long ago.
For the first time in a long time, I had actually slept well without and disturbances and unlike earlier, the slight silences were comfortable and needed.