I can tell Wes is thinkin' wicked hard. All the shit that went down at Angel Inc really fucked him up. Must'a hit a sore spot. I've always teased Wes, and it never occured to me until now that my special brand of teasing usually had a nasty bite to it. Fuck. The last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings and somethin' tells me that's exactly what I just did.
Finally, he smiles bitterly and answers.
"They...used to call me boss over at Angel Investigations. It is an empty title, useless, meaningless. And I might be all of that, Faith, that doesn't mean I need a constant reminder of it."
Shit. He was boss man? That had to sting like a bitch when no one had his back. I watch as he pulls out a shiny gun, and I'm suddenly seeing myself, long ago in the Mayor's office, lookin' at the wicked dagger with the same fondness Wes is right now. Probably makes him feel all badass havin' his toys. I can respect that so long as he doesn't go too far.
"So I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me boss. I'm no one's boss, never was,
( ... )
I freeze at her question, and slowly start to put away the gun again, within easy reach. I should get one with wooden bullets, might come in useful. Dragging my eyes up at her, I stare at her for a long time
( ... )
At first, all I hear is the soft 'yes', but then, he goes into this whole fuckin' spiel about how it didn't work the first time and blah, blah, blah.
Fuck this shit. I'm givin' him an offer he can't refuse, and what does he do? Turn me down.
I don't think so.
I don't want to do this, I really don't, but dude, he is pissing me off!
I don't feel sorry for him anymore. I did, but now I don't, and I can feel the rage boiling in my veins. He's not gonna use this as a fuckin' excuse. I'm done playin' this game. Grabbin' his shirt, I slam him up against the building, gettin' ready to give it to him good. I know this is a wicked stupid move on my part. I mean, here I am, doin' what I said I'd never do again but, he's just not cooperating, and I can't have that.
Well, I'm so glad to see something never really do change. Next thing I'm walking and keep my eyes open, apparently for the wrong thing, and then I suddenly find myself being slammed into a wall. By Faith who just excused herself for hurting me so badly. I guess she didn't really mean that.
I wonder why I fooled myself into thinking she really had changed. Because if she can do it, there's still hope for you isn't there? I guess Angel was wrong after all
( ... )
I smile when Wes checks behind him for more vamps. And that confused look on his face causes me to surpress another snort or two. God, I love teasin' him. It's just so easy.
"Alright, I know there's a nice quiet place around here. Some demons come there as well, but they're harmless. They just want to lead their lived just like humans would."
"Sounds great to me. It's been forever since I had any decent food," I say, walkin' out of the building. Then he asks what's wrong with his name, and the smirk is firmly in place for my next comeback. "Nothing's wrong with it. Just have more fun callin' you somethin' else, that's all. Now, point me in the direction of this dive you mentioned," I add, matchin' his pace. The sooner I get food, the better.
"Yes, I take it they didn't actually serve haute cuisine in prison." Not that Faith seems to be the type to actually enjoy such a dish. I snot at that, picturing her in a fancy dress in a formal restaurant. I should take her sometimes, just to see her reaction. Reactions, I guess. That should be an amusing evening.
I keep walking into the direction of this diner I know. It's about two blocks from here. I wonder if we should walk back to my apartment, and hope to run into some more vampires or demons, or hop on the bus again. I guess we can decided when we finish our meal, or Faith rather finishes her meal.
"If there's nothing wrong with my name, Faith," and I pause to give her a pointed look, "then I'd prefer it if you'd actually use it. I don't go around calling you any silly names either." And for the life of me? I can't even think of a silly nickname for Faith. Well, other then rude ones that is.
"What the fuck is 'haute', or whatever the hell you just said?" Wes always was good at confusin' me with big words. Now what's he snortin' about? I highly doubt he's havin' the same fucked up vision as me. Cuz if he is? That's all kinds of wrong.
We walk for a while before he breaks the silence again, tellin' me he wants me to use his name, and nothin' but his name. Uh...no. Hmm, maybe this'll make him feel better. "If you want to call me a silly name, go ahead. I'm not gonna stop ya. However, I'm not promisin' you won't get hit in the face for callin' me a bad name," I comment, knowin' damn good and well he will the first chance he gets.
"If you really want to know, I can show you some times," I snicker. Oh yes, that was definitely going to be fun. Except for the fact that I don't have any money for it, and I seriously doubt Faith would have any either. Oh well, maybe some day. Can't let go of all your dreams can you? Or nightmares.
My hand is clutching around the stake in my pocket as we move along. Just at the end of the street, on the corner is our little diner. I regard Faith for a moment. She's not going to stop calling me stupid names is she? She's doing it deliberately to annoy me. The silly twit.
Sighing, I wave toward the diner as we arrive and open the door. "Me?" I start, blinking at her innocently, holding the door open for her automatically. I guess some lessons will stay with you forever. Especially it they were taught with a rather hand. "I would never call you a bad name."
Nodding my head toward the door, I give her a small smile. "After you, Poppy."
I'm still starin' at myself in the mirror, when his voice cuts through the haze.
"Yes, because you sound perfectly fine..."
Damn him. Why can't he just walk away and forget about me? Is that really what I want? To be alone? I used to think it was, but now...
God I'm so confused.
Enough of this shit, Faith, shake it off, put on your cocky grin, and walk out like nothin' happened. But, how can I? He knows I'm freakin' out.
"Are you having trouble with your...err...freedom?"Fuck. He thinks this is some post-prison depression. "No. It's nothin' like that," I tell him, feelin' wicked stupid for havin' a cryin' fit in the first place. Puttin' a shaky hand on the doorknob, I open the door, and smile. "See, five by five, B-" I'm about to say 'Boss', but I hear his voice from a few hours ago, tellin' me he's no one's boss, so I change it to what he wants, "Wesley
( ... )
My eyebrow is already raised at the B word, but she quickly sidesteps to my own name. Alright, what is going on here? I don't like the look in her eyes. There's a flicker of what they looked like...that night. But there are a whole lot of other things in there, a whole range of emotions
( ... )
Wes echoes what I said, and I can hear the confused tone to his voice. He folds his arms over his chest and leans against the wall, watchin' me. I remember that pose. He used to do that in SunnyD during my trainin' sessions. And I know what that means...lecture time.
"Enough of this crap, Faith. What is going on? What happened to that enthusiasm you had a few hours ago when you were fighting?"
Shiftin' my eyes back to his face, I decide to come clean. I can't escape this time. "It's not like when I fight. Talkin' about...stuff, upsets me, okay. It's just hard," I begin with my explanation, but he's not done diggin' yet.
"What are you so afraid off?"Ah, that's the big question of the hour, now isn't it. Sighin', I shift my weight to one foot, and try my best to make him understand. "I'm afraid...of failin'. Failin' as a Slayer, failin' as a person. That's why I asked you to be my Watcher again. I wanted to become a better fighter. But, you clearly don't want that, so I should go and save us both the trouble. There ya
( ... )
It's hard to talk about...stuff. And with stuff I take it she means feelings and such things. Pesky emotions. I can understand that. I can still hear my fathers voice when it comes to that. 'I don't care how you feel, boy. That shouldn't matter, you're a man, a watcher, act like it. For gods sake, Wesley. Stop *embarrassing * me'. Oh yes, I still hear that voice most nights
( ... )
Comments 47
Finally, he smiles bitterly and answers.
"They...used to call me boss over at Angel Investigations. It is an empty title, useless, meaningless. And I might be all of that, Faith, that doesn't mean I need a constant reminder of it."
Shit. He was boss man? That had to sting like a bitch when no one had his back. I watch as he pulls out a shiny gun, and I'm suddenly seeing myself, long ago in the Mayor's office, lookin' at the wicked dagger with the same fondness Wes is right now. Probably makes him feel all badass havin' his toys. I can respect that so long as he doesn't go too far.
"So I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me boss. I'm no one's boss, never was, ( ... )
Reply
Reply
Fuck this shit. I'm givin' him an offer he can't refuse, and what does he do? Turn me down.
I don't think so.
I don't want to do this, I really don't, but dude, he is pissing me off!
I don't feel sorry for him anymore. I did, but now I don't, and I can feel the rage boiling in my veins. He's not gonna use this as a fuckin' excuse. I'm done playin' this game. Grabbin' his shirt, I slam him up against the building, gettin' ready to give it to him good. I know this is a wicked stupid move on my part. I mean, here I am, doin' what I said I'd never do again but, he's just not cooperating, and I can't have that.
Reply
I wonder why I fooled myself into thinking she really had changed. Because if she can do it, there's still hope for you isn't there? I guess Angel was wrong after all ( ... )
Reply
"Alright, I know there's a nice quiet place around here. Some demons come there as well, but they're harmless. They just want to lead their lived just like humans would."
"Sounds great to me. It's been forever since I had any decent food," I say, walkin' out of the building. Then he asks what's wrong with his name, and the smirk is firmly in place for my next comeback. "Nothing's wrong with it. Just have more fun callin' you somethin' else, that's all. Now, point me in the direction of this dive you mentioned," I add, matchin' his pace. The sooner I get food, the better.
Reply
I keep walking into the direction of this diner I know. It's about two blocks from here. I wonder if we should walk back to my apartment, and hope to run into some more vampires or demons, or hop on the bus again. I guess we can decided when we finish our meal, or Faith rather finishes her meal.
"If there's nothing wrong with my name, Faith," and I pause to give her a pointed look, "then I'd prefer it if you'd actually use it. I don't go around calling you any silly names either." And for the life of me? I can't even think of a silly nickname for Faith. Well, other then rude ones that is.
Reply
We walk for a while before he breaks the silence again, tellin' me he wants me to use his name, and nothin' but his name. Uh...no. Hmm, maybe this'll make him feel better. "If you want to call me a silly name, go ahead. I'm not gonna stop ya. However, I'm not promisin' you won't get hit in the face for callin' me a bad name," I comment, knowin' damn good and well he will the first chance he gets.
Reply
My hand is clutching around the stake in my pocket as we move along. Just at the end of the street, on the corner is our little diner. I regard Faith for a moment. She's not going to stop calling me stupid names is she? She's doing it deliberately to annoy me. The silly twit.
Sighing, I wave toward the diner as we arrive and open the door. "Me?" I start, blinking at her innocently, holding the door open for her automatically. I guess some lessons will stay with you forever. Especially it they were taught with a rather hand. "I would never call you a bad name."
Nodding my head toward the door, I give her a small smile. "After you, Poppy."
Reply
"Yes, because you sound perfectly fine..."
Damn him. Why can't he just walk away and forget about me? Is that really what I want? To be alone? I used to think it was, but now...
God I'm so confused.
Enough of this shit, Faith, shake it off, put on your cocky grin, and walk out like nothin' happened. But, how can I? He knows I'm freakin' out.
"Are you having trouble with your...err...freedom?"Fuck. He thinks this is some post-prison depression. "No. It's nothin' like that," I tell him, feelin' wicked stupid for havin' a cryin' fit in the first place. Puttin' a shaky hand on the doorknob, I open the door, and smile. "See, five by five, B-" I'm about to say 'Boss', but I hear his voice from a few hours ago, tellin' me he's no one's boss, so I change it to what he wants, "Wesley ( ... )
Reply
Reply
"Enough of this crap, Faith. What is going on? What happened to that enthusiasm you had a few hours ago when you were fighting?"
Shiftin' my eyes back to his face, I decide to come clean. I can't escape this time. "It's not like when I fight. Talkin' about...stuff, upsets me, okay. It's just hard," I begin with my explanation, but he's not done diggin' yet.
"What are you so afraid off?"Ah, that's the big question of the hour, now isn't it. Sighin', I shift my weight to one foot, and try my best to make him understand. "I'm afraid...of failin'. Failin' as a Slayer, failin' as a person. That's why I asked you to be my Watcher again. I wanted to become a better fighter. But, you clearly don't want that, so I should go and save us both the trouble. There ya ( ... )
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment