My knees hurt
Why do my knees hurt? Because I dont have my pain medication. Why dont I have my pain medication? Because my doctor-father took me off his health insurence so i cant afford to refill my scrip.
I found out out with a friend and exploded. It's very strange. I can cry in front of people. I can get naked in front of strangers. But when I get angry? I feel exposed in the most profound way imaginable. Why the hell is that? I swear, though, sometimes it really does feel like I'm shifting from Bruce Banner to the Hulk when I get angry. I hate her - the angry me. She's not attractive or someone anyone should be around and yet I cant always keep her in check. Especially not in the face of shit like this.
I've been writing to distract myself from the crapfest that is the real world this week (and the pain in my knees). But naturally, the majority of the progress is not one of my two planned BBBs. That would be too easy. No, its the prison fic. In about 48 hours its lept from 900 words to 10,000 words. I dont even know. I really dont. It's the first fic I've ever written where I'm actively slashing Bob Bryar. And its with one of the fucking Panic guys. WHAT THE HELL BRAIN. I just wrote my first ever Bob Bryar slash kiss. Its a little crazy. My brain is sparking and sputtering all over the place. But, unbelievably, the plot of this story is cohesive and complicated and I've managed to write some of the most fun character studies I've ever done. Seriously, I cant remember ever doing something like this. It's fucking exhilirating and scary and triggery and painful and fun all at once. I feel challenged in
I Know This Hurts(It Was Meant to)
14155 / 20000 words. 71% done!
Waiting in the Sky
8754 / 20000 words. 44% done!
You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison
10669 / 20000 words. 53% done!
I found out out with a friend and exploded. It's very strange. I can cry in front of people. I can get naked in front of strangers. But when I get angry? I feel exposed in the most profound way imaginable. Why the hell is that? I swear, though, sometimes it really does feel like I'm shifting from Bruce Banner to the Hulk when I get angry. I hate her - the angry me. She's not attractive or someone anyone should be around and yet I cant always keep her in check. Especially not in the face of shit like this.
I've been writing to distract myself from the crapfest that is the real world this week (and the pain in my knees). But naturally, the majority of the progress is not one of my two planned BBBs. That would be too easy. No, its the prison fic. In about 48 hours its lept from 900 words to 10,000 words. I dont even know. I really dont. It's the first fic I've ever written where I'm actively slashing Bob Bryar. And its with one of the fucking Panic guys. WHAT THE HELL BRAIN. I just wrote my first ever Bob Bryar slash kiss. Its a little crazy. My brain is sparking and sputtering all over the place. But, unbelievably, the plot of this story is cohesive and complicated and I've managed to write some of the most fun character studies I've ever done. Seriously, I cant remember ever doing something like this. It's fucking exhilirating and scary and triggery and painful and fun all at once. I feel challenged in
I Know This Hurts(It Was Meant to)
14155 / 20000 words. 71% done!
Waiting in the Sky
8754 / 20000 words. 44% done!
You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison
10669 / 20000 words. 53% done!