Pros and Cons

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As I cleaned up the kitchen during my lunch hour I tried to think of why having the kids live here is good

Comments

"walking into my house"

[redbaydreamer]

I think that is the key. It is indeed your house. You might want to start the discussion by saying that you want to have a relationship when they move on and in order to do that both sides need to make some compromises. I know that being a mother is a full time job, but getting the dishes done so that they are not there when you come home for lunch is not too much to ask. I know they pay something, but they don't really share in the expenses according to what they get out of it. I would think that signs that they are paying down their debt and saving for a down payment on an apartment might be something you could ask. A time line for when they might move out, the idea being that there needs to be a light at the end of the tunnel. D gets the house to herself (no one to tell her what to do) for a lions share of the day, so it seems she could be more understanding. It is not just immaturity, but a lack of responsibility. I think it might be important that you talk to M separately so that he has to face his complicity in what D

[panoramicgreen]

Ick. I'm with you-- I would find it so hard to have those kinds of meetings.

And I am so irritated on your behalf. I am blessed to have been given a fantastic mother-in-law, (as are you) and I just don't get not wanting to bend over backwards when sharing a home with people. I've had all kinds of roommates and floormates, and even when I loved them dearly, we had to work hard, and it wasn't always easy, but we were still gracious as we could be.