Hello! It's me. ^____^ May I just say, I'm really becoming a fan of yours? You pack a lot of punch in 1,000 words or less and I find it VERY appealing.
I was actually going to make a criticism until I got to the end and realized it works. I was going to say, "Maybe Kelsey in order to help hold up the impression of detached, mysterious horror." But then I thought, "Nah, I'm an idiot." Giving Kelsey an identity gives this piece the feeling of having been cut from a bigger block. It leaves the reader wanting more because they enjoyed -this-, as opposed to wanting more because this was lacking.
I was stoked to see that someone had chosen to do crucifixion this week and I adored this allusion to Biblical times: "...keeping him aloft like an ancient offender on Gol’gotha." Beautifully done. I was also really jazzed to discover you went the zombie route. ;-)
All in all, I call this a GREAT piece and I hope your Editors (if you signed up for them) feel the same. See you in Week 2!
Re: R.O.A.R. EDIT!!!!!covenmouseOctober 13 2009, 17:23:21 UTC
*giggles* I think we all have our moments of "missed a word" (or, yanno, ten.) You made me blush at my office, thank you X3
Honestly, how could I not? I came SO close to having a zombie with a high-heel through its foot, but sadly beyond the description of it I could think of no short story. It may yet happen because I think Kelsey is going to be a re-occurring player for this month's prompts. Zombies are one of my major obsessions, for whatever reason, so it was beyond me NOT to do it.
Can't thank you enough for the feedback, really, that made my day. <3
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I think I'm gonna have to stalk friend you now.
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By the way- great Firefly icon :D
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I was actually going to make a criticism until I got to the end and realized it works. I was going to say, "Maybe Kelsey in order to help hold up the impression of detached, mysterious horror." But then I thought, "Nah, I'm an idiot." Giving Kelsey an identity gives this piece the feeling of having been cut from a bigger block. It leaves the reader wanting more because they enjoyed -this-, as opposed to wanting more because this was lacking.
I was stoked to see that someone had chosen to do crucifixion this week and I adored this allusion to Biblical times: "...keeping him aloft like an ancient offender on Gol’gotha." Beautifully done. I was also really jazzed to discover you went the zombie route. ;-)
All in all, I call this a GREAT piece and I hope your Editors (if you signed up for them) feel the same. See you in Week 2!
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It SHOULD read... "I was going to say, "Maybe Kelsey should remain nameless in order to help hold up the impression of detached, mysterious horror."
Sorry. x.x
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Honestly, how could I not? I came SO close to having a zombie with a high-heel through its foot, but sadly beyond the description of it I could think of no short story. It may yet happen because I think Kelsey is going to be a re-occurring player for this month's prompts. Zombies are one of my major obsessions, for whatever reason, so it was beyond me NOT to do it.
Can't thank you enough for the feedback, really, that made my day. <3
((also: Icon love.))
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