Backdraft

[cosmic_medusa]

A/N there is a quote in here, indicated by * at the end of the sentence, that is taken directly from one of the greatest television shows ever made, Homicide: Life on the Street. On another note, this does not mean I condone the use of illegal substances-quite the opposite. Having had a beloved family member struggle with these issues, however, I

Comments

[kinkthatwinked]

Holy crap. This was an incredible study of grief.

I liked the AU changes: Dean happy in a long-term relationship outside of Sam, Cas as a doctor, John as an abuser/addict, Jess's death as a true accident, and Sam being utterly shattered by it this time.

It felt like Sam's grief was about more than the tragic loss, but also about his and Dean's past, which you still made into an ugly childhood even without the hunting. Speaking of their past, I liked the hints about the brothers' lifelong codependency, and how that led to some static when Cas first entered the picture.

And I love how solid Dean and Cas are, how their love is the foundation that keeps all three of them from crumbling under this tragedy. I also loved how the brothers' incredible devotion to each other, the very heart of the TV show, still comes through.

Frankly, I liked how Sam, similar to canon, became his father in the end. You could have ended it on that note of hope before the Brody part, but instead you kept it depressingly realistic.

Helluva job.

How did I never respond to this?

[cosmic_medusa]

I'm so sorry I didn't! but thank you, you really nailed what I was going for: that this set the ball rolling on a lot of issues both bros never dealt with. For Sam, it triggers a whole childhood of helplessness, and for Dean, a whole lot of "I can't protect you," and that kicks off their addiction spiral.

I'm so sorry this is so late--this review means a lot to me! All yours do. Thank you so much! <3

[debbiel66]

Beautiful last line, just beautiful.

[cosmic_medusa]

Thank you, brilliant, beautiful Lady! <3

[medusafox]

I knew, the minute I saw the title of this chapter, that I was done for. I sobbed at the end of that movie, and you had me going here, too. Poor Sam, he's so damn heartbroken. It's so easy to see how vulnerable he has become, and damn that Brady for taking advantage of his friend.

Move over, Dean, I need to give Sam a big hug.

[cosmic_medusa]

OMG, Backdraft totally killed me!

DEAN: Whatevs, you take over...

CAS: He doesn't mean that, medusafox.

SAM: I love hugs!

DEAN: *Totally jealous*

CAS: *Hugging Dean* It's all good! Thank you!

[usaexpat101]

excited to see another update to this verse...truly heart wrenching story...you don't pull any punches and grief can be like that, all messy and horrible and inconvenient, you did a brilliant job showing that...thanks

[cosmic_medusa]

Thank you for your loyal commenting/reading...and your super hot icons. UGH I didn't think Dean could get hotter...but then he went to purgatory!

[roxymissrose]

That was one of the most painful things I've ever read, because it felt so *true*. It's a horrible thing to be so destroyed by grief, and in this you can see the seeds of everything to come. As wonderful as Dean's support is, it's almost a bit too much, you know? Cas's support is more centered--but he's almost out of his element here and you can see him reaching out to Dean also, to help him help Sam.

Oy! I think I'm babbling but I'm all feelings and watery eyes and typing so fast I keep hitting between the keys, hah.

These poor boys, so much pain. I swear, even with everything that happens and how much pain he brings his family in this, I think this is my favorite Sam.

[cosmic_medusa]

Roxymissrose, you rock my world!!!! I'm always thrilled to see a comment from you, no matter how long or short, and I'm deeply honored you were able to write such a sweet, long review: I know this took your time and attention and I'm honored by it SO much!

And I'm the luckiest fangal on Earth to have you say that " I swear, even with everything that happens and how much pain he brings his family in this, I think this is my favorite Sam."

*Bows to you* :D

[roxymissrose]

Oh my, you make me blush!

I love the way you take such time with each of them, you know. I feel like I know these characters so well, even when we learn new things about them. It's like being let in on a private moment by your friends. But yeah, Sam...he's just got so much desire to make others happy, that he hurts himself with it. And now, he's just coming to realize just how much pain it causes those around him when he does that. That taking care of himself isn't self-centered, but an act of love, if that makes sense.

He makes me feel so much!

ach, *HUGS* thank *you*, for making me happy!