Comments | corbeaun: Fic: (HnG) Season of Black Chrysanthemums: Spring

corbeaun

Fic: (HnG) Season of Black Chrysanthemums: Spring - Part 4/4

Nov 15, 2007 13:36

Title: Season of Black Chrysanthemums: Spring
Author: corbeaun
Fandom: Hikaru no Go
Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go belongs to Obata Takeshi and Hotta Yumi.

Summary: In which Akira has issues with Yashiro...and let's everyone know it. And part of Icchan's scheme is revealed.

Thank you therhoda, for telling me to write the last section. :)

( Spring - Part 4 )

fandom: hikaru no go, hng: akira/hikaru, hng: sbc, fic: hng

Comments 45

sivullinen November 18 2007, 11:10:46 UTC

Yay! I was so happy to see another chapter of this story. Continues to be fascinating and Yashiro meeting Touya was so cool! I keep on wondering what's going to happen, which means this fic has eaten my brain *__*

Will be really excited to see Hikaru come to Korea :D

corbeaun November 20 2007, 17:43:35 UTC

jealous!Touya is for the win. :D

I keep wondering what will happen too, which is what really drives me to write this story. I know how it'll end, but the process of getting there is a delightful puzzle... *g*

(The comment has been removed)

corbeaun November 20 2007, 17:58:01 UTC

*blushes* Wow. I, uh, I'm really, really happy you liked it that much. *^___^*

I've actually had a bit more time to slow down the pace for "Spring," something that I didn't do for "Winter." And that luxury will probably be reflected in the much greater word count by the time I tie off "Spring." I'm also loving how I've been able to spend more time on Akira.

And you're more than welcome to stalk me for the HnG. *g*

aiwritingfic November 19 2007, 18:27:27 UTC

Oh my god. The last part was brilliant--it pulled you RIGHT BACK into the original plot. I can't wait for more.

corbeaun November 20 2007, 18:02:28 UTC

I must credit my lovely beta therhoda for that brilliance. She gave me the necessary impetus to overcome my laziness and write that last part. ^^ I haven't started at all on the next part, but it'll be the first thing on my list...after the holiday challenges, that is. *coughfifthmuscough* ^_^

aiwritingfic November 20 2007, 18:04:43 UTC

XD <3 *cheers you on*

corbeaun November 20 2007, 19:27:14 UTC

*^___^*

Soon anonymous November 19 2007, 19:04:43 UTC

I have to admit, you're quick to update. Congratulations! ^^ It was a nice chapter at that ( ... )

Re: Soon anonymous November 19 2007, 19:05:45 UTC

Shit, forgot to add my name... I'm Nadramon. See you around!

corbeaun November 20 2007, 19:23:37 UTC

Hey Nadramon! *g*

Thank you so much for your long and thoughtful review.

It is a problem making Akira suddenly react like that, since I've been writing mostly from Hikaru's POV for this entire series and so haven't had the time to show Akira's thoughts on all this. If I was able to rewrite "Spring - Part 1" (and I might just do that), I would his thoughts/emotions clearer when he thinks about Icchan and Hikaru and go. I'm realizing at this point from your comment and others that my version of Akira is not quite the version the readers have in mind - and that is something I'll have to fix.

About the slow realization of feelings...

You would have liked some of the drafts I made for Winter (but which I didn't have time to implement, and so I tossed most of it out) and the earliest version of this chapter. My lovely beta can attest to that. :) But I was getting decidedly antsy with the slow progress - so you're right if you've detected a bit of impatience here. ^^

No yaoi triangle, pretty please.*laughs* Oh, no worries. I'm not one ( ... )

...continued corbeaun November 20 2007, 19:24:34 UTC

Ah, and Akira.

We really don't know what's going on in his head right now - well, alright, strictly speaking, I should. ^^; But I would have to argue about the "mere-ness" of jealousy. Touya Akira at this point has a lot to be resentful and jealous of Yashiro for (and Hikaru too, for that matter). And I'm not talking about romantic jealousy - that was not what that challenge to Yashiro was about. Akira looks at this Kansai 7-dan, and sees someone who is living the life he desperately wants but (thinks) he can't have - as Shindo Hikaru's rival, as a go player who had access to the top pros in the world, and a potential finder of 'the hand of god.' And then to find out that Yashiro can't even beat the Tokyo pros Akira remembered cowing nearly a decade ago... It burns, in a really bad way ( ... )

das_nordlicht November 24 2007, 13:49:02 UTC

Thank you for the update. This is such a good story it's really hard to wait patiently. ^_ ( ... )

corbeaun November 27 2007, 08:58:04 UTC

Thank you for liking this story so much that you're willing to tell me how you read the character motivations. Because as a writer, that is just awesome as feedback. *g*

I'm also hoping that Akira's actions are comprehensible - in the context that I've written him into. But this is an AU, and I understand how some readers might find it difficult to accept him as a yakuza. Because in a sense, I'm not really writing about the canon Akira, but rather Akira two or three times removed. Compounded onto this difficulty is how I'm not really writing from Akira's prospective and so can't familiarize the readers with this new (warped) version by opening up his inner thoughts and desires - because essentially, this story is, like you said, Hikaru's story.

And personally, I think I write more interesting prose from Hikaru's pov. ^^

Oh, and your dissection of what was going on in Akira's head...

And I don't think that Akira realises himself what he is feeling at this point, he'll figure out much faster than Hikaru, when he'll calm down, but ( ... )