(no subject)
Title: Secondary Purpose
Fandom: JE
Pairing: Ryo/Koyama(/Shige)
Rating: PG?
Summary: It's awkward because it's them and Shige, and it's awkward because it's Ryo and them.
Warnings: Possibly non-linear. With no concrete ending.
A/N: Originally posted on my IRL LJ. Koyama has pretty wrists. Thanks to bitofpixiedust for the heart cheerleadering and to purplerouge3 for looking this over before anyone else (even if she can't tell Ryo from Shige from Koyama.)
1.
The melody of their new song thrums in his brain long after recording is over. It kind of reminds him of early morning cartoons, piled on the couch with his brothers, the volume low so their parents won't wake up. Paired with the exhaustion, it makes him soft and pliant, obliging when Koyama and Shige pull at his hands, drag him from the dressing room couch and into the halls.
The subway is crowded, but not as crowded as the club they eventually end up in. The blaring music doesn't match the song in his head, so it throws him off-kilter, makes him bob his head half a beat too soon, and the girls at the next table shoot him smiles. Instead of smiling back at them, he watches Koyama and Shige make eyes at each other, and he can read their interest in one another from across the room, even if they don't dance together, even if they have two pretty girls crushed between them, a petite girl with fried blonde hair pressed against Koyama and a tall foreign girl with her arms laced around Shige. They're wearing matching red shirts, and he wonders if they know each other, came to the club with the shared intention of seducing idols.
*
He leaves early, doesn't bother searching for either of them and hopes that they remember to grab the tab. It's hours before he feels the sheets of his bed flutter around him. Koyama smells like sweat and alcohol and perfume; Ryo breathes deeply, trying to catch the faintest whiff of Shige's favorite cologne.
"Missed you." Koyama's pressing a sloppy kiss below Ryo's ear. "Why'd you leave?"
Ryo's good at ignoring questions he doesn't care for. "You're kind of drunk, aren't you?"
Koyama laces cold arms around Ryo's waist. "Maybe a little."
"Did Protégé get home okay? Or is he passed out in my living room again?"
Koyama's snore is his only answer.
*
Ryo's not sure if he's surprised to find Shige curled up on the floor of his kitchen, clutching at his head.
"Ryo-kun," he whines, and Ryo laughs darkly.
He hums the melody of their new song, banging his spoon against the side of his coffee mug for all of Tegoshi's crescendos, while Shige drags himself off the floor and into Ryo's bed.
2.
They're suddenly on the Shounen Club. Ryo doesn't remember it being on the schedule, but he's pretty sure that their manager wouldn't have dragged them all there for nothing, and besides, Nakamaru seems to take it in stride, so he supposes they're actually supposed to be there. Ryo's clothes are tight and the sequins itch and he can see Shige helping Koyama with the weird buttons that go all the way up his back.
Shige's fingers linger over the notches of Koyama's spine and Koyama laughs, his eyes slanted shut, his head tilted down.
*
There's cheering at the end, when they bow. Koyama has the fingers of his left hand tucked in Shige's pocket and Ryo feels cold.
Then Koyama kisses him in the dressing room, his fingers tangled in Ryo's hair, wrecking what gallons of mouse achieved. When Koyama pulls back and licks Ryo's lips, Ryo can't help but see that Shige's still in the room, waiting, his eyes focused on the slope of Koyama's neck.
Ryo can never tell if Shige's jealous or not. Really, Ryo can never tell if Shige should be.
*
That night, the three of them end up at Shige's apartment. Shige's studying for some exam and Ryo watches Koyama clean and fetch with the television blaring sumo wrestling. He waits on the couch and Koyama drops into his lap every once in a while, presses kisses against Ryo's temples and grins. "Just a few more minutes," he promises each time. "Shige'll never remember to eat if he doesn't have clean dishes" or "What'll Shige wear to practice tomorrow if all his gym socks are dirty?"
Koyama fills the teapot up twice and Shige drinks it all down, and before they leave, Shige wraps his hand around Koyama's arm so they can exchange a few looks that Ryo can't read.
Ryo takes Koyama's other hand and traces figures on his wrist all the way out the door.
3.
For every single thing Koyama leaves at Ryo's apartment, it seems Shige leaves something at Koyama's. Koyama leaves behind piles of sweaters and underwear and a really annoying clock in the kitchen; Shige leaves books stacked tall on all the end tables and half a pound of his favorite coffee and a thousand different pairs of shoes lined up neatly by the door.
Maybe it's always been like that though, maybe Shige has been leaving stuff at Koyama's since Koyama moved from his mother's, maybe since before that, Ryo wouldn't know - he'd spent a long time pretending to ignore them both.
Ryo steals one of Shige's long sleeved shirts that he finds hanging in Koyama's closet. Even if it's Shige's, it smells like Koyama, and Ryo wraps up in it every single night he's in Osaka until the smell fades. He leaves it in his brother's dirty clothes basket and loses track of it.
*
It's around the time that Ryo returns from a particularly long stay in Osaka that he notices the third toothbrush in his cabinet. He doesn't ask about it, but it definitely hadn't been there when he'd left. The next time Shige crashes in his living room, it's nothing for Shige to drag himself awake and brush his teeth alongside Ryo, cinnamon flavored foam covering his lips and running down his neck. It's nothing for Koyama to make them both eggs (scrabbled for Ryo, sunny-side-up for Shige) and kiss them both on the forehead when they leave (drama meetings for Ryo, classes for Shige). It's nothing for them to ignore each other on the train (iPod for Ryo, a thick book for Shige) while they sit right next to each other.
Koyama texts him that afternoon, asking him if he'd been nice. He rolls his eyes and doesn't answer.
4.
Koyama's skin is smooth and damp. Every time Koyama passes by, Ryo stretches out and lets his fingers trail over whatever skin he can reach: thighs, lower back, wrists.
"Koyama, let's go to bed."
But Koyama keeps humming to himself, keeps walking through his small apartment, his hair dripping water all over the place. His hips sway to whatever he's humming - Ryo can't make out the notes because he's too distracted with the way Koyama's towel is draped around narrow hips, too distracted with the contrast of Koyama's tanned skin and Koyama's pale skin and Koyama's dark towel.
Ryo reaches out when Koyama passes again, and instead of sliding his hand against the curve of Koyama's hip, he grabs Koyama's arm and pulls until Koyama topples. He strokes his hands down Koyama's spine and yawns.
Koyama smiles indulgently. "Are we sleeping on the couch tonight?"
Ryo just burrows his face against Koyama's collarbone and licks.
*
There's a phone ringing, somewhere in the background, and Ryo's sure it isn't his. It's distracting and it won't stop and Ryo wonders if Koyama notices his phone ringing.
"Koyama?" he breathes. "I'm pretty sure that's Shige calling."
Koyama continues ignoring his phone.
5.
Rehearsals are always the same. Massu and Ryo get the steps down on the first few run-throughs, YamaPi and Koyama a few times after that, then Tegoshi, then the rest of their time is devoted to Shige making them all miserable. It makes Ryo resentful and sulky, and their choreographer demands that they stay until they can all do it in sync.
"Be patient," Koyama whispers when he passes Ryo. "He's getting better.
Shige stumbles but Ryo doesn't snap, instead just glares at Koyama, as if it's Koyama's fault instead of Shige's.
*
Ryo's ready to go, but Massu and Koyama and Shige are still at it, still painstakingly going over the steps again and again and again until they're hopefully drilled into Shige's brain. Tegoshi left because he had a lecture he had to attend and YamaPi is off in the corner, updating his nikki with tales of how he's really at a restaurant with his mabudachi and isn't barbequed meat the best, ne?
Ryo finally can't take it anymore, and grabs Koyama. "Don't come home until you can do the dance right," he commands Shige. He glares at the choreographer and dares him to say something. "Everyone come in thirty minutes early tomorrow and we'll get started on timing." Then he drags Koyama out of the rehearsal hall.
They're both still in their sweaty dance clothes and their bags and cell phones are still waiting by the mirror in the rehearsal hall, but Ryo doesn't care, keeps going down the hallway until they're hidden in the parking garage and sitting in Koyama's car.
Koyama's smiling. "What are you going to do if this gets back to Johnny?"
Ryo shrugs. "Fake a breakdown and blame it on Shige?"
He places his hand on Ryo's before starting up the car. "He tries, you know."
Ryo mumbles and doesn't say much of anything.
*
It's nearly midnight before Shige lets himself into Ryo's apartment with their bags all over his shoulder and his face tired and worn.
Why did you come here? is what Ryo wants to ask. "Where'd you get a key?" is what he asks instead.
Shige holds up Ryo's keyring, and Ryo subconsciously makes a mental note to make copies tomorrow.
6.
As many times as Ryo says his true home is still Osaka, Ryo doesn't really have an official place of residence there anymore. When he's there for filming and recording with Kanjani8, he'll crash at his eldest brother's, or at Ohkura's, or at some unlucky Junior's. It's hard, living out of a suitcase when he's supposedly home and his favorite jacket is a three hour train trip away because he forgot it again.
Somehow, without him noticing, Tokyo became home. Maybe because of NewS, maybe because it's near where all his dramas are filmed. Maybe because of Koyama. He finds himself sighing way too much when he's boarding the bullet train these days. It used to be easier, he thinks.
*
That night, he reaches out but Koyama's not there. Ohkura's apartment is chilly and the thin blanket is never enough and Ryo never remembers until Ohkura's already asleep.
Koyama's a good mind-reader though, because it's not much longer before Ryo's phone rings, loud and obnoxious and yeah, yeah, yeah, he's going to kill Tegoshi for changing his ringtone again.
"You haven't maimed anyone yet, have you?" Koyama's voice is soft and slurred.
"Just Ohkura's stupid dog."
Koyama's laughter is warm. "You can get arrested for animal abuse, you know."
Ryo grumbles. "Shouldn't you be asleep? You have Shounen Club filming in the morning."
"I couldn't sleep because you're not here," he says, and you can hear the thin embarrassment in his voice and Shige's laughter in the background.
"Protégé's there?"
"I told you I couldn't sleep because you're not here."
Ryo wonders where they are, if they're curled up in his sheets. "You have Shige, so go to sleep. I'll be home in a week." He hangs up.
7.
Ryo typically enjoys group photoshoots, even if they are tiring. It's a chance for him to be silly and lazy and watch Koyama half-clothed. There's music playing where Tegoshi has his iPod plugged into a set of speakers and they're both singing along.
Koyama is hanging over Shige's shoulder, watching as Shige silently makes changes to Tegoshi's hair. He bobs in time with the music, his outfit barely on, his pants unzipped and his shirt slipped over one arm and his head and Ryo wants to slide his hand along all that showing skin.
"The hairdresser is going to yell at you if she sees you."
Shige shrugs. "It's not like they'll toss me off set for fixing Tegoshi's hair."
Ryo agrees, but sometimes he wishes they would.
*
Koyama and Shige are called out for their photos when Massu and YamaPi return. Ryo cranes his neck and tries to watch them through the open dressing room door, but all he can see is the back of the photographer's assistant. Then YamaPi's closing the door and Tegoshi's whining that Ryo needs to hurry up and get dressed because they're next.
*
"Ramen?" Koyama asks Ryo when they're all exhausted and trudging back into the dressing room after group shots.
Ryo shakes his head no but isn't too surprised when he's tucked into the corner of a booth fifteen minutes later. Shige's sitting across from them, his head drooping and his hair floating in his broth.
"Shige's apartment is closest. There's no way you can make it all the way across Tokyo."
"Fine. But Shige's sleeping on the couch."
Shige doesn't even mumble a protest and when they get there he pulls extra blankets from the closet and lays himself down on the floor, but the next morning Ryo wakes up with his fingers laced around Shige's wrist and his face pressed against Koyama's spine. He doesn't pull away until Shige starts blinking himself awake.
8.
He hears them laughing through the closed door. Occasionally he can make out a few words, but mostly it's just the steady, low drone of conversation. Well, the steady, low drone of Koyama's voice.
He's sitting on the bathroom floor, legs stretched with his feet touching the cabinets, cell phone out and his fingers sending off texts to everyone he can think of, and he vaguely wonders when Koyama will notice that he's gone, that he's been gone for almost half an hour.
It's just, sometimes it's awkward. It's awkward when it's just Ryo and Koyama and Shige all the time. It's awkward because it's them and Shige, and it's awkward because it's Ryo and them. There's always an outsider and it's never Koyama.
He wonders why Koyama picked him over Shige, if Koyama made a choice like that at all, because sometimes it seems like he hasn't at all. Koyama shows up with Shige in tow, and Ryo can never tell Koyama no and turn Shige away.
*
"Ryo-kun?"
"What?"
Shige's silent from the other side of the door.
"What do you want, Shige?"
He still hesitates. "Are you going to be much longer?"
Ryo blinks. "It's my bathroom. I'll take as long as I like." But he unlocks the door and he can see the relieved look Koyama sends them. Shige ignores it.
9.
"Stop groping each other in the dressing room," YamaPi playfully demands when he enters with Tegoshi and Massu behind him.
Koyama's embarrassed and tries to break out of Ryo's grasp; Ryo doesn't loosen his hold. "I'm not groping him."
"Yet," Shige says, and Koyama's hands make their way over his face.
"Yeah. Yet," Ryo agrees, and licks a stripe across Koyama's knuckles.
*
Ryo's apartment feels bigger without Shige there. Quieter too, even if Shige is one of the quietest idols Ryo knows.
He turns the stereo up louder than he normally would while he and Koyama wait for their takeout to show up. Koyama's humming something that doesn't match at all, and Ryo finds himself picking up the harmony just as the doorbell rings.
Dinner is silent, Ryo reaching over and stealing whatever he wants from Koyama's plate, but Koyama doesn't squawk and complain about it like Shige would, just pushes all the water chestnuts - Ryo's favorite - off to the side.
When Koyama's cleaning up, he sticks his head back into the living room. "Why don't you call and see if Shige's done yet?"
Ryo rolls his eyes and grumbles, but he reaches for his phone a bit too quick.
10.
He's in Shibuya, and when he stops to buy one of those pretty necklaces he knows Koyama's been eying, he buys one for Shige too.
Fandom: JE
Pairing: Ryo/Koyama(/Shige)
Rating: PG?
Summary: It's awkward because it's them and Shige, and it's awkward because it's Ryo and them.
Warnings: Possibly non-linear. With no concrete ending.
A/N: Originally posted on my IRL LJ. Koyama has pretty wrists. Thanks to bitofpixiedust for the heart cheerleadering and to purplerouge3 for looking this over before anyone else (even if she can't tell Ryo from Shige from Koyama.)
1.
The melody of their new song thrums in his brain long after recording is over. It kind of reminds him of early morning cartoons, piled on the couch with his brothers, the volume low so their parents won't wake up. Paired with the exhaustion, it makes him soft and pliant, obliging when Koyama and Shige pull at his hands, drag him from the dressing room couch and into the halls.
The subway is crowded, but not as crowded as the club they eventually end up in. The blaring music doesn't match the song in his head, so it throws him off-kilter, makes him bob his head half a beat too soon, and the girls at the next table shoot him smiles. Instead of smiling back at them, he watches Koyama and Shige make eyes at each other, and he can read their interest in one another from across the room, even if they don't dance together, even if they have two pretty girls crushed between them, a petite girl with fried blonde hair pressed against Koyama and a tall foreign girl with her arms laced around Shige. They're wearing matching red shirts, and he wonders if they know each other, came to the club with the shared intention of seducing idols.
*
He leaves early, doesn't bother searching for either of them and hopes that they remember to grab the tab. It's hours before he feels the sheets of his bed flutter around him. Koyama smells like sweat and alcohol and perfume; Ryo breathes deeply, trying to catch the faintest whiff of Shige's favorite cologne.
"Missed you." Koyama's pressing a sloppy kiss below Ryo's ear. "Why'd you leave?"
Ryo's good at ignoring questions he doesn't care for. "You're kind of drunk, aren't you?"
Koyama laces cold arms around Ryo's waist. "Maybe a little."
"Did Protégé get home okay? Or is he passed out in my living room again?"
Koyama's snore is his only answer.
*
Ryo's not sure if he's surprised to find Shige curled up on the floor of his kitchen, clutching at his head.
"Ryo-kun," he whines, and Ryo laughs darkly.
He hums the melody of their new song, banging his spoon against the side of his coffee mug for all of Tegoshi's crescendos, while Shige drags himself off the floor and into Ryo's bed.
2.
They're suddenly on the Shounen Club. Ryo doesn't remember it being on the schedule, but he's pretty sure that their manager wouldn't have dragged them all there for nothing, and besides, Nakamaru seems to take it in stride, so he supposes they're actually supposed to be there. Ryo's clothes are tight and the sequins itch and he can see Shige helping Koyama with the weird buttons that go all the way up his back.
Shige's fingers linger over the notches of Koyama's spine and Koyama laughs, his eyes slanted shut, his head tilted down.
*
There's cheering at the end, when they bow. Koyama has the fingers of his left hand tucked in Shige's pocket and Ryo feels cold.
Then Koyama kisses him in the dressing room, his fingers tangled in Ryo's hair, wrecking what gallons of mouse achieved. When Koyama pulls back and licks Ryo's lips, Ryo can't help but see that Shige's still in the room, waiting, his eyes focused on the slope of Koyama's neck.
Ryo can never tell if Shige's jealous or not. Really, Ryo can never tell if Shige should be.
*
That night, the three of them end up at Shige's apartment. Shige's studying for some exam and Ryo watches Koyama clean and fetch with the television blaring sumo wrestling. He waits on the couch and Koyama drops into his lap every once in a while, presses kisses against Ryo's temples and grins. "Just a few more minutes," he promises each time. "Shige'll never remember to eat if he doesn't have clean dishes" or "What'll Shige wear to practice tomorrow if all his gym socks are dirty?"
Koyama fills the teapot up twice and Shige drinks it all down, and before they leave, Shige wraps his hand around Koyama's arm so they can exchange a few looks that Ryo can't read.
Ryo takes Koyama's other hand and traces figures on his wrist all the way out the door.
3.
For every single thing Koyama leaves at Ryo's apartment, it seems Shige leaves something at Koyama's. Koyama leaves behind piles of sweaters and underwear and a really annoying clock in the kitchen; Shige leaves books stacked tall on all the end tables and half a pound of his favorite coffee and a thousand different pairs of shoes lined up neatly by the door.
Maybe it's always been like that though, maybe Shige has been leaving stuff at Koyama's since Koyama moved from his mother's, maybe since before that, Ryo wouldn't know - he'd spent a long time pretending to ignore them both.
Ryo steals one of Shige's long sleeved shirts that he finds hanging in Koyama's closet. Even if it's Shige's, it smells like Koyama, and Ryo wraps up in it every single night he's in Osaka until the smell fades. He leaves it in his brother's dirty clothes basket and loses track of it.
*
It's around the time that Ryo returns from a particularly long stay in Osaka that he notices the third toothbrush in his cabinet. He doesn't ask about it, but it definitely hadn't been there when he'd left. The next time Shige crashes in his living room, it's nothing for Shige to drag himself awake and brush his teeth alongside Ryo, cinnamon flavored foam covering his lips and running down his neck. It's nothing for Koyama to make them both eggs (scrabbled for Ryo, sunny-side-up for Shige) and kiss them both on the forehead when they leave (drama meetings for Ryo, classes for Shige). It's nothing for them to ignore each other on the train (iPod for Ryo, a thick book for Shige) while they sit right next to each other.
Koyama texts him that afternoon, asking him if he'd been nice. He rolls his eyes and doesn't answer.
4.
Koyama's skin is smooth and damp. Every time Koyama passes by, Ryo stretches out and lets his fingers trail over whatever skin he can reach: thighs, lower back, wrists.
"Koyama, let's go to bed."
But Koyama keeps humming to himself, keeps walking through his small apartment, his hair dripping water all over the place. His hips sway to whatever he's humming - Ryo can't make out the notes because he's too distracted with the way Koyama's towel is draped around narrow hips, too distracted with the contrast of Koyama's tanned skin and Koyama's pale skin and Koyama's dark towel.
Ryo reaches out when Koyama passes again, and instead of sliding his hand against the curve of Koyama's hip, he grabs Koyama's arm and pulls until Koyama topples. He strokes his hands down Koyama's spine and yawns.
Koyama smiles indulgently. "Are we sleeping on the couch tonight?"
Ryo just burrows his face against Koyama's collarbone and licks.
*
There's a phone ringing, somewhere in the background, and Ryo's sure it isn't his. It's distracting and it won't stop and Ryo wonders if Koyama notices his phone ringing.
"Koyama?" he breathes. "I'm pretty sure that's Shige calling."
Koyama continues ignoring his phone.
5.
Rehearsals are always the same. Massu and Ryo get the steps down on the first few run-throughs, YamaPi and Koyama a few times after that, then Tegoshi, then the rest of their time is devoted to Shige making them all miserable. It makes Ryo resentful and sulky, and their choreographer demands that they stay until they can all do it in sync.
"Be patient," Koyama whispers when he passes Ryo. "He's getting better.
Shige stumbles but Ryo doesn't snap, instead just glares at Koyama, as if it's Koyama's fault instead of Shige's.
*
Ryo's ready to go, but Massu and Koyama and Shige are still at it, still painstakingly going over the steps again and again and again until they're hopefully drilled into Shige's brain. Tegoshi left because he had a lecture he had to attend and YamaPi is off in the corner, updating his nikki with tales of how he's really at a restaurant with his mabudachi and isn't barbequed meat the best, ne?
Ryo finally can't take it anymore, and grabs Koyama. "Don't come home until you can do the dance right," he commands Shige. He glares at the choreographer and dares him to say something. "Everyone come in thirty minutes early tomorrow and we'll get started on timing." Then he drags Koyama out of the rehearsal hall.
They're both still in their sweaty dance clothes and their bags and cell phones are still waiting by the mirror in the rehearsal hall, but Ryo doesn't care, keeps going down the hallway until they're hidden in the parking garage and sitting in Koyama's car.
Koyama's smiling. "What are you going to do if this gets back to Johnny?"
Ryo shrugs. "Fake a breakdown and blame it on Shige?"
He places his hand on Ryo's before starting up the car. "He tries, you know."
Ryo mumbles and doesn't say much of anything.
*
It's nearly midnight before Shige lets himself into Ryo's apartment with their bags all over his shoulder and his face tired and worn.
Why did you come here? is what Ryo wants to ask. "Where'd you get a key?" is what he asks instead.
Shige holds up Ryo's keyring, and Ryo subconsciously makes a mental note to make copies tomorrow.
6.
As many times as Ryo says his true home is still Osaka, Ryo doesn't really have an official place of residence there anymore. When he's there for filming and recording with Kanjani8, he'll crash at his eldest brother's, or at Ohkura's, or at some unlucky Junior's. It's hard, living out of a suitcase when he's supposedly home and his favorite jacket is a three hour train trip away because he forgot it again.
Somehow, without him noticing, Tokyo became home. Maybe because of NewS, maybe because it's near where all his dramas are filmed. Maybe because of Koyama. He finds himself sighing way too much when he's boarding the bullet train these days. It used to be easier, he thinks.
*
That night, he reaches out but Koyama's not there. Ohkura's apartment is chilly and the thin blanket is never enough and Ryo never remembers until Ohkura's already asleep.
Koyama's a good mind-reader though, because it's not much longer before Ryo's phone rings, loud and obnoxious and yeah, yeah, yeah, he's going to kill Tegoshi for changing his ringtone again.
"You haven't maimed anyone yet, have you?" Koyama's voice is soft and slurred.
"Just Ohkura's stupid dog."
Koyama's laughter is warm. "You can get arrested for animal abuse, you know."
Ryo grumbles. "Shouldn't you be asleep? You have Shounen Club filming in the morning."
"I couldn't sleep because you're not here," he says, and you can hear the thin embarrassment in his voice and Shige's laughter in the background.
"Protégé's there?"
"I told you I couldn't sleep because you're not here."
Ryo wonders where they are, if they're curled up in his sheets. "You have Shige, so go to sleep. I'll be home in a week." He hangs up.
7.
Ryo typically enjoys group photoshoots, even if they are tiring. It's a chance for him to be silly and lazy and watch Koyama half-clothed. There's music playing where Tegoshi has his iPod plugged into a set of speakers and they're both singing along.
Koyama is hanging over Shige's shoulder, watching as Shige silently makes changes to Tegoshi's hair. He bobs in time with the music, his outfit barely on, his pants unzipped and his shirt slipped over one arm and his head and Ryo wants to slide his hand along all that showing skin.
"The hairdresser is going to yell at you if she sees you."
Shige shrugs. "It's not like they'll toss me off set for fixing Tegoshi's hair."
Ryo agrees, but sometimes he wishes they would.
*
Koyama and Shige are called out for their photos when Massu and YamaPi return. Ryo cranes his neck and tries to watch them through the open dressing room door, but all he can see is the back of the photographer's assistant. Then YamaPi's closing the door and Tegoshi's whining that Ryo needs to hurry up and get dressed because they're next.
*
"Ramen?" Koyama asks Ryo when they're all exhausted and trudging back into the dressing room after group shots.
Ryo shakes his head no but isn't too surprised when he's tucked into the corner of a booth fifteen minutes later. Shige's sitting across from them, his head drooping and his hair floating in his broth.
"Shige's apartment is closest. There's no way you can make it all the way across Tokyo."
"Fine. But Shige's sleeping on the couch."
Shige doesn't even mumble a protest and when they get there he pulls extra blankets from the closet and lays himself down on the floor, but the next morning Ryo wakes up with his fingers laced around Shige's wrist and his face pressed against Koyama's spine. He doesn't pull away until Shige starts blinking himself awake.
8.
He hears them laughing through the closed door. Occasionally he can make out a few words, but mostly it's just the steady, low drone of conversation. Well, the steady, low drone of Koyama's voice.
He's sitting on the bathroom floor, legs stretched with his feet touching the cabinets, cell phone out and his fingers sending off texts to everyone he can think of, and he vaguely wonders when Koyama will notice that he's gone, that he's been gone for almost half an hour.
It's just, sometimes it's awkward. It's awkward when it's just Ryo and Koyama and Shige all the time. It's awkward because it's them and Shige, and it's awkward because it's Ryo and them. There's always an outsider and it's never Koyama.
He wonders why Koyama picked him over Shige, if Koyama made a choice like that at all, because sometimes it seems like he hasn't at all. Koyama shows up with Shige in tow, and Ryo can never tell Koyama no and turn Shige away.
*
"Ryo-kun?"
"What?"
Shige's silent from the other side of the door.
"What do you want, Shige?"
He still hesitates. "Are you going to be much longer?"
Ryo blinks. "It's my bathroom. I'll take as long as I like." But he unlocks the door and he can see the relieved look Koyama sends them. Shige ignores it.
9.
"Stop groping each other in the dressing room," YamaPi playfully demands when he enters with Tegoshi and Massu behind him.
Koyama's embarrassed and tries to break out of Ryo's grasp; Ryo doesn't loosen his hold. "I'm not groping him."
"Yet," Shige says, and Koyama's hands make their way over his face.
"Yeah. Yet," Ryo agrees, and licks a stripe across Koyama's knuckles.
*
Ryo's apartment feels bigger without Shige there. Quieter too, even if Shige is one of the quietest idols Ryo knows.
He turns the stereo up louder than he normally would while he and Koyama wait for their takeout to show up. Koyama's humming something that doesn't match at all, and Ryo finds himself picking up the harmony just as the doorbell rings.
Dinner is silent, Ryo reaching over and stealing whatever he wants from Koyama's plate, but Koyama doesn't squawk and complain about it like Shige would, just pushes all the water chestnuts - Ryo's favorite - off to the side.
When Koyama's cleaning up, he sticks his head back into the living room. "Why don't you call and see if Shige's done yet?"
Ryo rolls his eyes and grumbles, but he reaches for his phone a bit too quick.
10.
He's in Shibuya, and when he stops to buy one of those pretty necklaces he knows Koyama's been eying, he buys one for Shige too.