A/N: Before anything else, it's been a while since I last wrote a fan fiction. I'm very very rusty already. I'm sorry for the grammar mistakes and all the other mistakes I committed. It is not beta'd because I'm a narcissist, I trust my own skills haha! Yeah right. This is intended to be a oneshot but it's too long so I divided it in two parts... So this is a two-part oneshot fan fiction.
**My first time making a fiction about a real person so please do spare my innocence.
Here it is:
"Umaku Ienai"
(I Can't Say It Well)
She had always loved the piano for a long time though she only started studying how to play it a month ago. She loved how that particular instrument created melodies that could capture anyone's heart. After gathering enough will, confidence and spare time, she finally enrolled on a music class and attended it every Thursday and Friday afternoon after her regular classes.
The first meetings were heart pounding since she needed to introduced herself to everyone and mixed in with the established groups so she could discover which she might belong. When the first two weeks of her being a music student passed, she already mastered two piano pieces; The Pachelbel’s Canon and Moonlight Sonata, the first was her favorite.
On a Thursday afternoon, as she entered the music room and sat on her usual seat on the last row, she noticed an unfamiliar face on her left. The guy was spacing out on the corner so she didn't bother talking to him. As the class progressed, she learned that the guy wasn't new at all. Her seatmate on her right said that he had been enrolled in the music school for quite a while and was specializing on drums and guitar as his 2nd instrument. He was taking a special course so he wasn't always attending classes but just when he needed to study a piece or when he's not that busy.
She wondered, "Is he a celebrity to be given that privilege?"
Her classmate raised an eyebrow, "You don't know?"
But before she could answer her, the teacher caught their attention and they were told to stop chatting while the classes were going on.
Few meetings had passed and the intriguing guy, who she knew was named Nakajima Yuto, had always been there on the seat on her left. She never talked to him despite of the fact that he's actually very popular with the girls in their class that every after their meetings, they gathered up in front of his seat. She immediately went out of the class every time the teacher announced, 'dismissed' so those mad fangirls wouldn't pissed her off as they crowd near her chair but during that particular Friday, before she could went near the stairs that would lead her to the ground floor of the building and away from their music room, someone purposely called out her attention.
"Excuse me!"
She turned around and saw a guy almost a foot taller than her. Few seconds passed, she realized it was the famous guy, "What do you want?" She asked.
"I think this belongs to you..." He said while showing a blue eraser on his right hand.
Careless. "Ahh... Yeah! Thanks." She said and grabbed the eraser from his hand.
She saw him smiled at her. She didn't know why it sent her insides some tingling feeling.
"Would you mind if I join your way in going home?" He casually asked, still the smile plastered on his face.
She nodded, thinking nothing would be wrong if there would be another companion while she's walking home.
Later that night, she watched the news on TV and it flashed about a group from Johnny's Entertainment that would have a Spring Concert. She almost spilled the water she was drinking when she saw a familiar face among the group of boys promoting their concert. As each of them introduced their selves, her suspicion was confirmed, "Wow! He looks different on TV!" She commented.
"Who?" She heard her sister asked while passing behind her.
Her eyes widened, "Ah... the reporter!" She excused.
She expected her sister to reply and sighed in relief when she heard nothing.
Now she knew why her classmates always talked and thronged to him while in class, he was indeed cool and famous.
The monthly recital was already approaching. She was worried of what piece should she play when the teacher announced that the recitals would be by pair and students with the same instruments couldn't be partners. Her worries were added.
She slapped her right palm to her forehead, "Who the heck will be my partner?" She whispered in pain.
Just when she thought everything would be going out of her way, he asked her to be his partner. She was enlightened! She knew he was playing the drums and guitar, two very different instruments from piano. She thought she harbored all the luck in the world.
They met each other more often than they usually did so they could practice the piece that they would play for the recital. He chose guitar as his instrument while she was on the piano.
Her days became more joyful. Every time they practiced together on the music room of the school, she felt like she was in heaven. For music lovers, playing music together with the people you admired or love is like a union of the melodies of your heart, equally satisfying with the physical union of physical bodies. She turned happier and very inspired. Her family noticed it and concluded it was all due to music's effect on her. They were wrong but she didn't bother to correct them.
One day, she woke up realizing how he colored her world and how he showed how special she was. She concluded she was falling in love for the very first time. She was full with glee. She wanted to show it to the world. So then, she tried to know him better by searching his name through the internet. She learned that he liked cute girls and was very disappointed about her self. She wasn't cute on any aspect at all. As she wondered along the internet, she discovered so many things about him. She realized he would never like someone like her. She was very ordinary. Everything sloped down. She tried to stop falling in love with him to avoid just being hurt. She limited herself from looking at him, bonding with him and even when they were practicing, she rather spaced out on the corner than talked random things with him liked they usually did. She couldn't help it but sigh.
The recital day came; they performed well, everyone stood up after they presented their piece. Their teacher congratulated them. Afterwards, he offered to treat her on the nearby ice cream shop. She accepted it though she refused at first.
He asked her is she's mad at him. She said, 'no'. He asked her again if what's wrong because she seemed silent these past few days. She said she didn't have anything to talk about. That made him silent. She got guilty so she opened a topic. They both enjoyed their conversation but before it ended, he revealed something.
"This is going to be my last recital for the music school." He said.
"Ha?"
"I'm going to withdraw from the music school tomorrow. My schedule will be very hectic because of the upcoming concerts and I can't attend music classes anymore." He explained.
Tears dwelt on the corner of her eyes but she stopped herself from crying, "I understand."
On that night, she decided to confess to him before he left the music school. She thought it was her only chance to do it. She planned everything, every second, every move and every word she would say should be based on her plan so she could stay on track, keep her cool and say everything she wanted to say.
On the next day, their class started like how it usually did. The teacher congratulated them for a job well done during the recitals and how she was so proud of them. After all the nice talks, she painstakingly announced the withdrawal of one of her good and famous students. Everyone was surprised, except for her who knew it all along. The teacher called Yuto and let him speak his thanks in front of the class.
She noticed some of her classmate crying like someone just died, rather something, she smirked. Their hopes to be a celebrity's girlfriend died faster than they expected.
After the class, everyone said their goodbyes to him; even the boys in class did the same thing. She was secretly happy too see all her classmates appreciated him, but who won't? He's Nakajima Yuto. When all the goodbyes went down and the emotional atmosphere disappeared, it was time for her plans to be carried out.
Like the usual, they were walking together towards the train station. As soon as her train arrived, everything would be ruined so she started talking to him while they were waiting.
She looked at her watch, 10 minutes left before the train would arrive. "Eto... Nakajima-kun, we will all miss you." She said in a sad tone.
"Me too." He replied.
"Do you think we will see each other again?"
"Of course." He answered with a smile, "I hope you'll come to our concerts!"
"Hmm... I'll try my best!" She answered. "I hope you won't forget us..."
"I won't." He said.
Her heart was beating faster. She told herself to think about the plan but her thoughts went into total darkness. "Please take care..." were the words that came out of her mouth instead of what she intended to say.
"Thank you and you too!" He smiled again.
She wanted to flail every time she saw that beautiful smile that could light up anyone's depressed heart.
Few minutes had passed before she finally decided to say the three words that had been on the tip of her tongue. She badly wanted to spit it out already as her pulse raised. She's a beginner in the field of love and that was going to be her first time confessing to a guy.
She let out a deep sigh, gathered all her strength and opened her mouth, "Nakajima-kun..."
Just as she quickly stated it, the train had finally arrived with its thunder-like accompaniment. The worst-case scenario… that was what she thought.
"Huh? You've said something? I didn't hear you, the train was noisy..." He said.
Right on that moment, she wanted to commit suicide. "Uhh, nothing."
"Seriously? I saw you saying something." He asked to assure it.
She only smiled, "Yeah..." And she stood up. "This is my train. I'll go ahead!"
He also stood up and walked with her towards the door of the train.
"Thank you." She said thinking that could only be her final words to him.
"I'm glad I meet you and all the people in the music school." He exclaimed.
"Me too and I'm sure all of them are glad too. Take care. Sayonara!" She said. The automatic door of the train closed, separating the two of them.
He waved and so did she.
The train started its engine signing the end of all her fairytale-like imaginings. "How awful... We were actually not meant for each other." She uttered to herself with great disappointment while collapsing her body to the nearby vacant seat. A bitter smile was plastered on her face.
---
One year had passed. She never felt as good as like she was feeling that time. She graduated from the music school a week ago and gained a not so prestigious award from the school's faculty.
If only he was there to witness how she improved in playing the piano, she thought.
It was exactly a year ago when she last saw him. She was currently sitting on the same seat she had the time she confessed to him. She remembered every word of their conversation, every detail and the very moment when she told him her feelings just in time when the train interrupted them. She sighed. ~
She had never recovered. Until now, she was still regretting for not telling him properly about her feelings. She was deeply attached to him, to her memories of him and to her feelings towards him. It was very obvious when she turned down two suitors even before they could confess to her. She knew she should stop loving him but all throughout the year, her feelings remained.
She smiled as she noticed how pathetic she was. She realized she was ready to stop on that moment; stop from thinking of him almost everyday, stop from wondering if she would be able to talk to him again and stop from loving him. Just then, the train arrived. Exactly a year ago, she had fallen in love and confessed to him on that place yet she decided to put an end to her wishful thinking and start a new life again, a life without him.
Few days had passed, someone called her through the telephone. The caller said she saw her advertisement on a website about tutoring piano lessons in home. She accepted the caller's salary offer because she was planning to buy a gift for her mother's upcoming birthday. The job was fine; she would go to the caller's house during Fridays and Saturdays at four in the afternoon until six in the evening. Their tutoring sessions would only last for two months and that would be enough time to let her save for the present. After the caller gave her the address, she hung up.
It was a windy Spring Friday afternoon when she arrived in front of the house of her client. The woman, who seemed to be the caller, let her in and gave her a short introduction about herself. She said she wanted to be called 'Nakajima-san' (Mrs. Nakajima). The name rang a bell on her thoughts but she told herself there were hundreds of people in Japan with Nakajima as surnames. She gave her a tea while they chatted. The woman said her son wasn't home yet though he should be there already. She patiently waited on the sofa in the living room.
Ten minutes passed. She heard the door opened and someone shouted, "Tadaima...!"
Nakajima-san immediately went to the direction of the door and started mumbling something to the person who came home.
A tall kid emerged behind the wall that separated the hallway from the living room. "Hello!" He greeted her, "I'm sorry to keep you waiting."
She stood up, "Oh, it's fine!"
"Whoah! I thought Mama hired an old teacher but you seemed still in high school!" He commented.
"Raiya, do not talk like that in front of your new teacher. Whether she's still a high school student or not, you should respect her!" Nakajima-san chewed him off.
"Ahhh... but...” He protested.
She only smiled, "Just behave properly and lead her to the music room so you could start already." His mother ordered.
"Will you go to the grocery today?" He asked.
She nodded, "Yeah. I need to buy new food stocks and your brother's favorite. I'm sure he'll be very tired and hungry when he gets home." She answered before walking away.
The kid then led her to the music room his mother was talking about. As they were walking, she realized how tall her student was and thought, 'This is going to be a tough job...'
"Sensei!" He called out.
"Yeah?"
"This is our music room!" He announced as he stopped from walking and opened the door.
She looked inside and saw a drum set, an electric guitar hanged on the wall, a microphone and its stand, some speakers and amplifiers with its corresponding bunches of wires arranged neatly, a jukebox and a grand piano.
"I'm sorry if it's kinda messy in here Sensei," He apologized as the two of them stepped in the room. "My brother and I used to hang up in here so things usually won't be on their proper places."
"But the room looks fine for me." She commented.
"Really! By the way, I'm Nakajima Raiya! It’s nice to meet you Sensei. I was the one who saw your ad on the internet and convinced Mama to let us hire you..." He said as a late introduction.
"Thanks to you, I know have a part time job." She thanked him.
He looked at her, "But I never thought you're still this young Sensei..."
"Hmm, why don't you just call me Onee-chan?" She suggested.
He smiled, "That will be nice! I never had my own sister but you could be!" He said gleefully.
"Can I sit here?" She asked him while pointing the chair in front of the piano.
"Sure!"
Then she sat and started pressing the keys. "Why do you wanna learn how to play piano Nakajima-kun?" She asked.
The place turned relaxing as she created slow melody through the piano.
"Just call me Raiya-chan and I wanna play piano because I simply love it!" He answered.
"Hmmm, is that so?" She remarked, sounding like a real teacher. 'I'm getting to like this', she thought.
"Ahhh! I'll just call you Piano-nee!" He exclaimed then gave a light chuckle, "Would you mind?"
She wanted to oppose but she thought it would be cute so she just let him call her whatever he wanted. "Okay." She stood up and let her student sat in front of the piano and they started the piano lessons.
Later, the watch on her left wrist struck 6 o'clock. That's the end of their lesson for the day.
"I'll be back tomorrow so please don't forget what we have tackled for today." She told her student.
"Okay Piano-nee... By the way, won't you eat dinner with us? It'll be ready soon." He invited her.
They were already heading out from the music room when she smelled the tasty aroma of cooked food. "I'm sorry but I have another appointment to attend. Tomorrow, maybe I could accept your invitation by tomorrow." She assured.
"Promise?"
She just nodded.
Raiya shouted that his teacher would be going and his mother immediately appeared from the kitchen and they led her to the doorway.
"That's unfortunate; you should meet my brother Piano-nee!" He protested.
"Tomorrow for sure, Raiya-chan." She said with a smile.
"Uhh, I'm sorry dear. Raiya just loves to share anything to his brother even this piano lesson and made his brother wanting to meet you too but he couldn't make it because of his work." His mother apologized for Raiya's action.
"It's fine with me. I wanna see his brother too. I've heard he is a good musician from Raiya." She said, "I'll go ahead." And then she bowed.
By the time she already went out of their gates, hired and got on a taxi, a car parked in front of the gates of the Nakajima Residence. She was curious of whom it was but the taxi already started its engine and moved away.
She just sighed. "That may be the intriguing brother they were talking about. Hmm... I think he's on his mid 20s since he's already working...” Her thoughts guessed.
Tomorrow came in no time. She found herself in front of her student's house pressing the doorbell. His mother welcomed her again. By that time, she didn't wait for Raiya since he was already in home, anxious to learn more about the piano.
As they proceeded halfway, her student asked for a break.
"Okay." She said.
Both of them went out of the room and headed to the dining room. His mother offered them some newly baked cookies for snacks.
"It's good Nakajima-san!" She remarked.
"Thank you Sensei!" She said, flattered. "Sometimes, it's nice to hear compliments for what you cook from those people who never tasted it before."
"Why? You always thought we were only joking when we say you're the best cook in the world?" Raiya asked, pouting.
His mother chuckled, "Of course not. But I know you're biased!"
Everyone laughed.
After eating their snacks, the two of them headed back to the music room. As they were walking, her vision glanced on framed photos arranged on top of a small side table set near the wall. Her eyesight was fairly bad that she couldn't figure out the faces of those on the photos but she was sure she saw four figures. She guessed that was their family picture; the father, mother, oniichan and Raiya.
By the moment they were ready to start, someone arrived and shouted, "Tadaima!"
She was surprised and so was her student that he immediately raised from his seat and headed to go out, "Excuse me for a while Piano-nee." He said before disappearing behind the door of the room.
She found herself alone so she started wandering around the room. She intently looked at the drum set then to the guitar hung on the wall. She was standing in front of the guitar when the door opened. She immediately turned around and found Raiya pulling someone behind him.
"Piano-nee, I'd like you to meet my oniichan!" He announced.
She smiled at Raiya and shifted her sight to the person behind him. He was a tall guy, has a good face and was wearing a surprised expression. Then she realized who was it, "EHHH???!!" She blurted out, "N-nakajima Yuto-kun??!!" Her eyes widened.
(Part 2:)