Clean Slate - Chapter Seven
Title: Clean Slate - Chapter Seven
Rating: T
Word Count: 2,833
Characters/Pairing: Sam, Dean, Bobby.
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst
Summary: Death: 'Nasty, those memories. You don't want to know what they'll do to him.'
After an accident, Sam's memories of the last two years are wiped. What
starts out as a blessing soon turns into a curse as Sam's memories are
reawakened.
LIMP!HURT!SAM WORRIED!DEAN
Set S7 Episode 06 - Story picks up at the end of Slash Fiction and becomes AU.
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.
Spoilers: Up to Season Seven: Episode 6
Thanks go to SnarkyMuch2 for beta’ing this fic.
Chapter Seven
Two weeks passed since Bobby got the call about Sam, a month passed since the accident, and there was no change in Sam's condition, no change in him, but plenty in Dean and Bobby. They were exhausted, and swiftly running out of hope.
After the first week, Dean was forced to admit that Sam wasn't going to spontaneously open his eyes, and Bobby had persuaded him to spend every other night at the motel to get something close to quality rest. On the nights Dean slept at the motel, Bobby stayed in the hospital so Sam wouldn't be alone. Sam was never alone. The only time the two hunters left the room was when the nurses were seeing to Sam's personal care needs. The rest of the time, Dean and Bobby flanked Sam on either side. They tried to keep him involved, but it was hard to hold a conversation when the missing piece of their trio was oblivious to everything happening around him.
"I'm not sure how much longer I can do this, Bobby," Dean admitted.
Bobby's brow furrowed. Dean was usually careful about what he discussed around Sam. Since he had walked out on his brother, only to return a few hours later, drunk, he had been diligent in giving Sam something to wake up to, and familiar voices and a stress free environment was part of that.
Bobby pushed to his feet and gestured for Dean to follow him out of the room.
"We'll be right back, Sammy," Dean said, gripping his brother's wrist. "I just need to talk to Bobby for a minute."
Bobby paused at the door and caught the eye of a passing nurse. "Charlotte, do you think you can sit with John for a minute?"
"Of course." She smiled brightly. Her initial impression of Bobby as dangerous had faded the more contact she had with him. She now saw him as a family member like any other, only concerned with their loved one. She was still intimidated by Dean. The only softness she saw in him was when he was speaking to his brother.
"Thanks."
Satisfied that someone would be with his brother, Dean followed Bobby to the small lounge room situated off the main corridor of the ward. Dean sank into a chair and hid his face in his hands. Bobby remained standing, looking down at his surrogate son.
"What do you mean you can't do this?" he asked. "You're not thinking of-"
"I'm not running off." Dean scowled. "I just don't know how much longer I can sit there and talk to him like he's listening to me, when we both know..."
"We don't know anything"
"We know he's not waking up," Dean said. "It's been a month now, Bobby, a month, and he's showing no signs of getting better."
"We just need to give him time. He's been through a lot, and he needs to-"
"I love you like a father, Bobby, but if you give me the 'time to heal' speech, I will kill you."
Bobby snorted. "I know you don't want to hear it, but it's the truth. He does need to heal."
"What if we don't have time?" Dean asked. "We've been kicking our heels here for two weeks now, doing nothing."
"We've been doing everything we can."
"We need to do more!"
"Okay," Bobby said slowly. "Tell me what to do, and we'll do it."
Dean raked a hand through his hair. "We need help, supernatural help."
"We're kinda low on options here, son. We don't have Cas anymore, and if you're thinking what I think you're thinking, you're out of luck. I will tie you to a chair and leave you there before I let you go near a crossroads."
Dean barked a laugh. "Don't think I haven't thought about it, but no one will deal with me, not now. And as for angels, you're right, Cas is gone, and Balthazar is missing. We have no chance of persuading anyone that doesn't know us to help." He sighed. "I was thinking of a faith healer. Sam found one that time for me. There has to be someone out there that can fix this."
"A faith healer." Bobby scrubbed at his beard. "I don't know. Sam finding that one was a one in a million chance."
"It's a long shot, I get that," Dean said. "But it's not impossible."
Bobby sat down heavily and clasped his hands between his knees. He considered Dean's words. A faith healer was their best chance at fixing Sam up completely. Unless Sam himself could find a way to claw out of his coma alone, it was their only chance. Medicine had done all it could for him.
"Okay," he said eventually. "I'll call around some. Hunters have been keeping an eye on faith healers since you boys found that one with a pet reaper. If there's anyone out there that's the real deal, I'll hear about it."
Dean got to his feet and grinned. "Thanks, Bobby."
"Dean," Bobby said as Dean reached for the doorknob. "We're talking the real deal here, right? You're not thinking of exchanging Sam's place for another poor sap, are you?"
Dean shook his head. "Of course not, Bobby. The real deal only." What he didn't say aloud was that if he thought a reaper would be able to exchange Sam for another person, he would have summoned one himself weeks ago.
Bobby went back to the motel to make some calls to other hunters and Dean headed back to Sam's room. Charlotte was beside the bed, doing her hourly checks.
"Everything okay?" Dean asked.
"John's doing just fine." She smiled. "Doctor Saunders has written him up for a MRI this afternoon."
"Why would she do that if he's fine?" Dean asked.
"It's just a precaution. She wants to see how his intestine is healing."
Dean knew the real reason for the doctor's attentiveness, and while it pleased him that Sam was getting such good care, it didn't excuse the fact they had failed so miserably already. And there was nothing Dean could do about it. He wanted to rant and rave and threaten lawsuits against those that had failed his brother, but he couldn't; John Smith didn't exist.
Dean refused to call Sam John. It wasn't his name; it was just an alias dreamed up by the insane Frank Devereaux. If Dean had known what was going to happen, he would have insisted that they stayed Sam and Dean. Though if he had known what was going to happen, he would never have let Sam walk away from him in the first place.
Dean nodded. "That's good. When are they coming for him?"
"Should be soon. I'll leave you two to talk. If you need anything, use the call button."
Dean watched her go and then turned his attention to his brother.
"It's just you and me, Sammy. Bobby has gone to make a few calls. We have a plan to help you."
Dean imagined Sam's brow furrowing as he reacted to that news. Of course it didn't happen, Sam's face remained lax and peaceful looking, but it helped Dean to imagine his brother as he had been when talking to him.
"I've had an idea, Sammy. A faith healer."
The Sam in Dean's mind raised his eyebrows, looking concerned.
"It'll be different this time. No pet reapers. Just a good old fashioned miracle." He laughed at himself, and his Sam smiled. "I get that's it a long shot, but it's the only shot we got. You don't seem to be able to do this alone."
The Sam in his mind looked sad.
"I understand. You're already fighting, I know that, but if you have anything in reserve, now would be the time to bring it out. I need you awake. I can't do this without you. And there's plenty to do. You won't leave me to fight these leviathans alone will you?"
The leviathans… Dean had barely thought of them lately; everything with Sam had eclipsed it, but now he couldn't help but wonder what was happening with them. He thought he should have felt guilty for his lack of action against them, people were dying after all, but his concern for Sam overcame his guilt. Besides, they weren't the only hunters in the world. Why was it their job to bring them down? No, he was going to focus his energies on his brother. When Sam was back on his feet, they could take down the leviathans together.
"Don't you worry about the leviathans, Sammy," Dean said gripping his hand tightly. "We can take care of them together."
An hour later, the orderlies came in to take Sam for his scan. Dean hated to watch the preparations, as it meant Sam was removed from his ventilator for a moment while they attached him to a portable one. The heart monitor was momentarily disconnected as they did the same. It reminded Dean of a team of experts disarming a bomb, and it scared him. He looked away as they worked, staring out of the window.
"Okay, we're ready," Charlotte said, and Dean moved to his brother's side once again. He pushed Sam's unruly hair away from his face, and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "You behave yourself down there, Sammy. No nasty surprises."
He straightened and nodded at the orderlies. With care, they wheeled Sam out of the room.
"Charlotte," Dean said. "He'll be okay, right?"
"John will be fine. He won't be alone for a moment."
Dean nodded his satisfaction and sat down in the chair to wait for his brother to return.
"Okay, Garth, thanks anyway. And remember, if you hear anything, you be sure to call me."
"I sure will. You take care, Bobby."
"I always do."
Bobby set the phone back in its cradle. He tugged off his baseball cap and ran a hand through his graying hair. "Dammit."
Garth had been one of the last numbers he had to call, and he knew nothing of any faith healers. There were dozens advertised on the internet but none that looked remotely genuine. If Bobby didn't have any luck soon on the phone, he was going to have to track them all down in person and see what they could do.
Despite the fact he was getting nowhere fast with his hunter friends, Bobby was feeling hope for the first time in two weeks. Having something to do, anything to do, was a good feeling. He knew Dean was feeling the same way. The fact there was the slight chance that they could get Sam back was the first spot of light in a very dark time.
He picked up his phone and dialed another number. He had been reluctant about calling this person, as she knew Sam personally and he didn't want to have to share the news of what had happened.
The phone rang out and he was connected to a voicemail service. Grateful for the reprieve, Bobby left a message.
"Annie, it's Bobby Singer. I'm looking for information on faith healers. We've kinda got ourselves in a bit of a mess here, and we need some help. If you know anything, please call me back. You know the number. Take care of yourself."
Setting the phone down again, he sank back into his chair. He had one number left to call, and it was someone he hadn't spoken to in a long time. Picking up the card for Mackey's Taxidermy, he dialed the number.
A voice answered. "This is Mackey."
"Mackey, it's Bobby Singer. I need help."
Mackey was instantly alert. "What's wrong?"
"One of the Winchester boys is in trouble, and we're looking for help of a supernatural kind."
"Some demon get him?"
Bobby laughed shakily. "Afraid not, not a monster either. Would you believe a car took him out?"
"A possessed car?"
"Possessed by a soccer mom. The kid was just crossing the street and he got taken out. He's in a bad way, and we don't know what to do for him anymore."
"Last I heard, the Winchester boys had a pet angel following them around. Can't they help?"
"We kinda lost him," Bobby said heavily.
"You lost an angel?"
"It's a long story." Bobby sighed. "Suffice to say, we can't call on him for help. We're looking for a faith healer."
"A faith healer, huh?" Mackey chuckled. "I may be able to help you there. My current hunt is a faith healer in Colorado. Some guy called Emmanuel."
"Seriously?" Bobby's heart lightened at the thought of this Emmanuel. If there was even a chance he could help Sam, Bobby would do anything, pay anything.
Mackey laughed. "Seriously. I've got an appointment with him tomorrow and a full bag of tricks to test out on him. I'll call you when I'm done with him and let you know what I find."
"Thank you, Mackey. You don't know what this means to us."
"No worries, Bobby. I'll speak to you soon. You take care now."
"You too."
Bobby set the phone down and exhaled in a shaky gust. He may have found a way to help his boy. The thought had him grinning like a fool.
Grabbing his keys, he shrugged on his jacket and set out for the hospital to share the good news with Dean.
In the radiology wing of the hospital, Sam was carefully loaded onto the table of the MRI machine. Mindful of the wires and tubes required for his care, Charlotte checked him over once before stepping away from the machine and going into the control booth. From there, she could monitor his heart rate and sats with the monitors. The machine whirred to life and let out a cacophony of noise.
Sam was unaware of the noise. He was in a peaceful place away from sound and touch and pain. The only company he had in this place was his own thoughts, and they were hard to marshal. He didn't mind. There was no need to think here. All he had to do was just be.
Sam had no concept of time passing. To him, he had been in this place an eternity, and he didn't mind that at all. He had no inclination to do anything. He was content to ride the peaceful ebb and tide.
Except… He felt like he was missing something. That there was something he should be doing.
Something was missing from this perfect place. Someone should have been there with him, someone that was always there.
With that thought came a sense of urgency, and the peaceful place didn't feel so good anymore.
Sam battled to open his mouth to speak. If someone could hear him, they might be able to answer his questions, but he was frozen in place. Something was holding him down. There was a darkness here, tempting him away. He battled against the weight against him, but as he did, the darkness crept in faster. The darkness scared him. He was sure if he allowed himself to fall into it, he would never get free again.
He stopped pushing against the wall, and the darkness instantly receded. Exhausted by the effort expended, Sam allowed the peace to roll over him once again.
He would try again, just as soon as he got some rest.
In the control room of the MRI scanner, Nurse Charlotte Gaines watched in horror as John Smith's heart rate climbed.
"Dammit," she cursed, rushing into the room. "We need to get him out of there. He's going to crash!"
There was flurry of movement as the machine was shut down and Sam was brought out. His heart was racing, and Charlotte slammed a hand on the crash button.
"C'mon, John, don't do this to me," she said desperately. She couldn't bear the thought of going back to the ICU and telling Dean and Bobby that John had been lost.
The crash team barreled into the room, wheeling equipment with them.
"What do we have here?" The doctor asked.
"Sustained V-tac at 175," Charlotte reeled off. "He was perfectly stable only a minute before."
"Let's get him stable again," the doctor said confidently.
"We've lost pulse!" an intern barked.
"Charging!"
"Wait!" The doctor held up a hand. "Look at that." On the monitor, John Smith's pulse returned. It was still high but slowing.
"Is he bradying down?"
The doctor shook his head. "No, look." The monitor read a steady sixty beats per minute.
"I've never seen anything like it," Charlotte said breathlessly.
"There's a first time for everything." The doctor was just as shocked as she was, but he didn't want to show his inexperience. "Let's get this kid back to the ICU before he pulls another stunt like that."
Nodding her agreement, Charlotte set about preparing Sam for transport.
In all the action, no had one noticed Sam's finger twitching against his blanket.
Rating: T
Word Count: 2,833
Characters/Pairing: Sam, Dean, Bobby.
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst
Summary: Death: 'Nasty, those memories. You don't want to know what they'll do to him.'
After an accident, Sam's memories of the last two years are wiped. What
starts out as a blessing soon turns into a curse as Sam's memories are
reawakened.
LIMP!HURT!SAM WORRIED!DEAN
Set S7 Episode 06 - Story picks up at the end of Slash Fiction and becomes AU.
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: I own nothing. No copyright infringement intended.
Spoilers: Up to Season Seven: Episode 6
Thanks go to SnarkyMuch2 for beta’ing this fic.
Chapter Seven
Two weeks passed since Bobby got the call about Sam, a month passed since the accident, and there was no change in Sam's condition, no change in him, but plenty in Dean and Bobby. They were exhausted, and swiftly running out of hope.
After the first week, Dean was forced to admit that Sam wasn't going to spontaneously open his eyes, and Bobby had persuaded him to spend every other night at the motel to get something close to quality rest. On the nights Dean slept at the motel, Bobby stayed in the hospital so Sam wouldn't be alone. Sam was never alone. The only time the two hunters left the room was when the nurses were seeing to Sam's personal care needs. The rest of the time, Dean and Bobby flanked Sam on either side. They tried to keep him involved, but it was hard to hold a conversation when the missing piece of their trio was oblivious to everything happening around him.
"I'm not sure how much longer I can do this, Bobby," Dean admitted.
Bobby's brow furrowed. Dean was usually careful about what he discussed around Sam. Since he had walked out on his brother, only to return a few hours later, drunk, he had been diligent in giving Sam something to wake up to, and familiar voices and a stress free environment was part of that.
Bobby pushed to his feet and gestured for Dean to follow him out of the room.
"We'll be right back, Sammy," Dean said, gripping his brother's wrist. "I just need to talk to Bobby for a minute."
Bobby paused at the door and caught the eye of a passing nurse. "Charlotte, do you think you can sit with John for a minute?"
"Of course." She smiled brightly. Her initial impression of Bobby as dangerous had faded the more contact she had with him. She now saw him as a family member like any other, only concerned with their loved one. She was still intimidated by Dean. The only softness she saw in him was when he was speaking to his brother.
"Thanks."
Satisfied that someone would be with his brother, Dean followed Bobby to the small lounge room situated off the main corridor of the ward. Dean sank into a chair and hid his face in his hands. Bobby remained standing, looking down at his surrogate son.
"What do you mean you can't do this?" he asked. "You're not thinking of-"
"I'm not running off." Dean scowled. "I just don't know how much longer I can sit there and talk to him like he's listening to me, when we both know..."
"We don't know anything"
"We know he's not waking up," Dean said. "It's been a month now, Bobby, a month, and he's showing no signs of getting better."
"We just need to give him time. He's been through a lot, and he needs to-"
"I love you like a father, Bobby, but if you give me the 'time to heal' speech, I will kill you."
Bobby snorted. "I know you don't want to hear it, but it's the truth. He does need to heal."
"What if we don't have time?" Dean asked. "We've been kicking our heels here for two weeks now, doing nothing."
"We've been doing everything we can."
"We need to do more!"
"Okay," Bobby said slowly. "Tell me what to do, and we'll do it."
Dean raked a hand through his hair. "We need help, supernatural help."
"We're kinda low on options here, son. We don't have Cas anymore, and if you're thinking what I think you're thinking, you're out of luck. I will tie you to a chair and leave you there before I let you go near a crossroads."
Dean barked a laugh. "Don't think I haven't thought about it, but no one will deal with me, not now. And as for angels, you're right, Cas is gone, and Balthazar is missing. We have no chance of persuading anyone that doesn't know us to help." He sighed. "I was thinking of a faith healer. Sam found one that time for me. There has to be someone out there that can fix this."
"A faith healer." Bobby scrubbed at his beard. "I don't know. Sam finding that one was a one in a million chance."
"It's a long shot, I get that," Dean said. "But it's not impossible."
Bobby sat down heavily and clasped his hands between his knees. He considered Dean's words. A faith healer was their best chance at fixing Sam up completely. Unless Sam himself could find a way to claw out of his coma alone, it was their only chance. Medicine had done all it could for him.
"Okay," he said eventually. "I'll call around some. Hunters have been keeping an eye on faith healers since you boys found that one with a pet reaper. If there's anyone out there that's the real deal, I'll hear about it."
Dean got to his feet and grinned. "Thanks, Bobby."
"Dean," Bobby said as Dean reached for the doorknob. "We're talking the real deal here, right? You're not thinking of exchanging Sam's place for another poor sap, are you?"
Dean shook his head. "Of course not, Bobby. The real deal only." What he didn't say aloud was that if he thought a reaper would be able to exchange Sam for another person, he would have summoned one himself weeks ago.
Bobby went back to the motel to make some calls to other hunters and Dean headed back to Sam's room. Charlotte was beside the bed, doing her hourly checks.
"Everything okay?" Dean asked.
"John's doing just fine." She smiled. "Doctor Saunders has written him up for a MRI this afternoon."
"Why would she do that if he's fine?" Dean asked.
"It's just a precaution. She wants to see how his intestine is healing."
Dean knew the real reason for the doctor's attentiveness, and while it pleased him that Sam was getting such good care, it didn't excuse the fact they had failed so miserably already. And there was nothing Dean could do about it. He wanted to rant and rave and threaten lawsuits against those that had failed his brother, but he couldn't; John Smith didn't exist.
Dean refused to call Sam John. It wasn't his name; it was just an alias dreamed up by the insane Frank Devereaux. If Dean had known what was going to happen, he would have insisted that they stayed Sam and Dean. Though if he had known what was going to happen, he would never have let Sam walk away from him in the first place.
Dean nodded. "That's good. When are they coming for him?"
"Should be soon. I'll leave you two to talk. If you need anything, use the call button."
Dean watched her go and then turned his attention to his brother.
"It's just you and me, Sammy. Bobby has gone to make a few calls. We have a plan to help you."
Dean imagined Sam's brow furrowing as he reacted to that news. Of course it didn't happen, Sam's face remained lax and peaceful looking, but it helped Dean to imagine his brother as he had been when talking to him.
"I've had an idea, Sammy. A faith healer."
The Sam in Dean's mind raised his eyebrows, looking concerned.
"It'll be different this time. No pet reapers. Just a good old fashioned miracle." He laughed at himself, and his Sam smiled. "I get that's it a long shot, but it's the only shot we got. You don't seem to be able to do this alone."
The Sam in his mind looked sad.
"I understand. You're already fighting, I know that, but if you have anything in reserve, now would be the time to bring it out. I need you awake. I can't do this without you. And there's plenty to do. You won't leave me to fight these leviathans alone will you?"
The leviathans… Dean had barely thought of them lately; everything with Sam had eclipsed it, but now he couldn't help but wonder what was happening with them. He thought he should have felt guilty for his lack of action against them, people were dying after all, but his concern for Sam overcame his guilt. Besides, they weren't the only hunters in the world. Why was it their job to bring them down? No, he was going to focus his energies on his brother. When Sam was back on his feet, they could take down the leviathans together.
"Don't you worry about the leviathans, Sammy," Dean said gripping his hand tightly. "We can take care of them together."
An hour later, the orderlies came in to take Sam for his scan. Dean hated to watch the preparations, as it meant Sam was removed from his ventilator for a moment while they attached him to a portable one. The heart monitor was momentarily disconnected as they did the same. It reminded Dean of a team of experts disarming a bomb, and it scared him. He looked away as they worked, staring out of the window.
"Okay, we're ready," Charlotte said, and Dean moved to his brother's side once again. He pushed Sam's unruly hair away from his face, and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "You behave yourself down there, Sammy. No nasty surprises."
He straightened and nodded at the orderlies. With care, they wheeled Sam out of the room.
"Charlotte," Dean said. "He'll be okay, right?"
"John will be fine. He won't be alone for a moment."
Dean nodded his satisfaction and sat down in the chair to wait for his brother to return.
"Okay, Garth, thanks anyway. And remember, if you hear anything, you be sure to call me."
"I sure will. You take care, Bobby."
"I always do."
Bobby set the phone back in its cradle. He tugged off his baseball cap and ran a hand through his graying hair. "Dammit."
Garth had been one of the last numbers he had to call, and he knew nothing of any faith healers. There were dozens advertised on the internet but none that looked remotely genuine. If Bobby didn't have any luck soon on the phone, he was going to have to track them all down in person and see what they could do.
Despite the fact he was getting nowhere fast with his hunter friends, Bobby was feeling hope for the first time in two weeks. Having something to do, anything to do, was a good feeling. He knew Dean was feeling the same way. The fact there was the slight chance that they could get Sam back was the first spot of light in a very dark time.
He picked up his phone and dialed another number. He had been reluctant about calling this person, as she knew Sam personally and he didn't want to have to share the news of what had happened.
The phone rang out and he was connected to a voicemail service. Grateful for the reprieve, Bobby left a message.
"Annie, it's Bobby Singer. I'm looking for information on faith healers. We've kinda got ourselves in a bit of a mess here, and we need some help. If you know anything, please call me back. You know the number. Take care of yourself."
Setting the phone down again, he sank back into his chair. He had one number left to call, and it was someone he hadn't spoken to in a long time. Picking up the card for Mackey's Taxidermy, he dialed the number.
A voice answered. "This is Mackey."
"Mackey, it's Bobby Singer. I need help."
Mackey was instantly alert. "What's wrong?"
"One of the Winchester boys is in trouble, and we're looking for help of a supernatural kind."
"Some demon get him?"
Bobby laughed shakily. "Afraid not, not a monster either. Would you believe a car took him out?"
"A possessed car?"
"Possessed by a soccer mom. The kid was just crossing the street and he got taken out. He's in a bad way, and we don't know what to do for him anymore."
"Last I heard, the Winchester boys had a pet angel following them around. Can't they help?"
"We kinda lost him," Bobby said heavily.
"You lost an angel?"
"It's a long story." Bobby sighed. "Suffice to say, we can't call on him for help. We're looking for a faith healer."
"A faith healer, huh?" Mackey chuckled. "I may be able to help you there. My current hunt is a faith healer in Colorado. Some guy called Emmanuel."
"Seriously?" Bobby's heart lightened at the thought of this Emmanuel. If there was even a chance he could help Sam, Bobby would do anything, pay anything.
Mackey laughed. "Seriously. I've got an appointment with him tomorrow and a full bag of tricks to test out on him. I'll call you when I'm done with him and let you know what I find."
"Thank you, Mackey. You don't know what this means to us."
"No worries, Bobby. I'll speak to you soon. You take care now."
"You too."
Bobby set the phone down and exhaled in a shaky gust. He may have found a way to help his boy. The thought had him grinning like a fool.
Grabbing his keys, he shrugged on his jacket and set out for the hospital to share the good news with Dean.
In the radiology wing of the hospital, Sam was carefully loaded onto the table of the MRI machine. Mindful of the wires and tubes required for his care, Charlotte checked him over once before stepping away from the machine and going into the control booth. From there, she could monitor his heart rate and sats with the monitors. The machine whirred to life and let out a cacophony of noise.
Sam was unaware of the noise. He was in a peaceful place away from sound and touch and pain. The only company he had in this place was his own thoughts, and they were hard to marshal. He didn't mind. There was no need to think here. All he had to do was just be.
Sam had no concept of time passing. To him, he had been in this place an eternity, and he didn't mind that at all. He had no inclination to do anything. He was content to ride the peaceful ebb and tide.
Except… He felt like he was missing something. That there was something he should be doing.
Something was missing from this perfect place. Someone should have been there with him, someone that was always there.
With that thought came a sense of urgency, and the peaceful place didn't feel so good anymore.
Sam battled to open his mouth to speak. If someone could hear him, they might be able to answer his questions, but he was frozen in place. Something was holding him down. There was a darkness here, tempting him away. He battled against the weight against him, but as he did, the darkness crept in faster. The darkness scared him. He was sure if he allowed himself to fall into it, he would never get free again.
He stopped pushing against the wall, and the darkness instantly receded. Exhausted by the effort expended, Sam allowed the peace to roll over him once again.
He would try again, just as soon as he got some rest.
In the control room of the MRI scanner, Nurse Charlotte Gaines watched in horror as John Smith's heart rate climbed.
"Dammit," she cursed, rushing into the room. "We need to get him out of there. He's going to crash!"
There was flurry of movement as the machine was shut down and Sam was brought out. His heart was racing, and Charlotte slammed a hand on the crash button.
"C'mon, John, don't do this to me," she said desperately. She couldn't bear the thought of going back to the ICU and telling Dean and Bobby that John had been lost.
The crash team barreled into the room, wheeling equipment with them.
"What do we have here?" The doctor asked.
"Sustained V-tac at 175," Charlotte reeled off. "He was perfectly stable only a minute before."
"Let's get him stable again," the doctor said confidently.
"We've lost pulse!" an intern barked.
"Charging!"
"Wait!" The doctor held up a hand. "Look at that." On the monitor, John Smith's pulse returned. It was still high but slowing.
"Is he bradying down?"
The doctor shook his head. "No, look." The monitor read a steady sixty beats per minute.
"I've never seen anything like it," Charlotte said breathlessly.
"There's a first time for everything." The doctor was just as shocked as she was, but he didn't want to show his inexperience. "Let's get this kid back to the ICU before he pulls another stunt like that."
Nodding her agreement, Charlotte set about preparing Sam for transport.
In all the action, no had one noticed Sam's finger twitching against his blanket.