that dance that you dance with abandon

[christastrophe]

Once again I extend the warmest thank you to everyone of you that has been following Leigh's condition.

The last 24 hours have been rough on Leigh. She is having serious setbacks and the swelling has returned and may be unmanageable. The doctor for the first time has called into question whether she will be able to survive

Comments

faith

[yokogweno]

i made contact with her soul last week who was lost and didn't know what had happened for her to be separated from her body.

i performed a long-distance soul retrieval.
her spirit was happy to reunited with her body.
i sense she will come to, but it will take some readjustment time for her soul first.

a blessing that comes with events such as these is the grand reminder it gives the rest of us of how precious e-v-e-r-y day is and of how much more we need to fill our lives with gratitude and thanks and love and prayers and come together come together come together.

the abundance of people praying for her is immense healing all on its own.
keep your chin up and keep those prayers coming, cause they ain't going unnoticed by the Almighty :)

Re: faith

[christastrophe]

Thanks, Gwen. You're right - it's so important to keep in mind all of the energy and the healing we can do from afar with our thoughts and prayers. It's all we have.

[cailin23]

thank you. it really is the intangible that is killing me. the other night my giant state of texas necklace broke. the one i put on thinking i'd keep wearing it until my favorite texan woke up. and it fucking broke as i got on the g train. THIS MEANS SOMETHING. it doesn't, of course. i sobbed anyway.

the stupid new york loneliness doesn't help. and so i sit on the train and cry behind my plastic sunglasses. then i get home and reload a website a few thousand times hoping for news.

mostly i go through the day wanting to vomit.

The stupid New York Loneliness

[christastrophe]

I've been riding the subway with sunglasses. It's so weird. I don't know why I care what anybody sees. It's obvious I'm (we're) crying. We're not protecting ourselves from paparazzi or anything. Why do we do that? I guess for privacy, I guess because this is personal. Still.

I keep looking for significance, too; significance in everything. Whatever is The Thing that we're gonna tell her when she wakes up. "We were about to lose hope and then--get this--I found this old picture of us in this shoebox and you woke up that afternoon." But it's not there. Just our big intangible love for her and for each other.

Re: The stupid New York Loneliness

[wannabeparker]

Dru found an old video on his computer from the basement days. And the film is just of a fan/ lamp/ ashtray (or something, it doesn't matter) but the sound is of Leigh and I having a conversation. about darning. We're talking about how we wish we knew how to darn. At one point Leigh says "Darn it!". And then she laughs.

And now, thinking about her laugh, I burst into tears at work. And I'm not wearing sunglasses, but I don't give a fuck. Let them stare. I've given up trying to explain this to anyone who doesn't know her.

[sherinyb]

thank you for writing what i needed to read and what i couldn't write myself.

today's my anniversary and my sister's birthday and i feel like shit for wanting to celebrate and for being happy about my trip home this weekend and yet i know those feelings share the same space as my constant prayers for leigh. they are all lit by the huge fucking spotlight that this has shone on everything -- that life/love/family/friendship is far more fragile and precious than our daily grinds allow us to acknowledge, because living in that spotlight causes the nausea, the worry, the mental incapacitation to deal with the mundane details. i try to envision comfort - for her, for friends and family - but it's not the same as sharing a hug with someone who knows.

[special_karen]

I have been here before, though I don't like to think about it much. It sucks. There's nothing easy or fun about it.

I don't feel like I know Leigh that well, I probably know her more from her LJ updates than anything else, but I'm still worried and following closely and hoping and praying and the rest. If you figure out how to get those laserdiscs, let me know and I'll see what I can't rustle up.

[daily_good_news]

I too only really know Leigh from my interactions with her from the flat plex days.

She once referred to herself as "Wendy" to the "lost boys" of the flat plex. I always thought that it was a perfectly apt analogy, and that image has always stuck with me.
And, I like to believe that if she was tough enough to take on that role, than she is tough enough to come through the other side of
what she is dealing with now.

I wish her, her family, loved ones and friends strength and peace.