Fic: A little Wilson/House from the drabble requests
Spoilers for this season of House!
dancinbutterfly suggested 'something from Wilson's POV about the "Just looking at you hurts" line maybe?' Season 4, PG-ish, about 360 words.
What Makes You Stay?
Just looking at you hurts.
I’ve seen him in pain. I’ve seen House trying to cope. Watched him kick, and pretend to kick his addiction. Watched him...hurt. For Stacy, but mostly for himself.
All he does is hurt.
This time, this time it has a higher purpose, though part of me says that’s a joke. House has never believed in the afterlife, and never did I think for one second that he would change his mind about it. With this proof though... This proof that there’s nothing does it mean that maybe he regrets- I mean, does it mean that now he knows he’s right and all there is in the world is pain?
Is this going to justify him being miserable? Justify him stopping any attempt to be happy? I can’t watch him. I can’t watch him simply live with it because he thinks, ‘why bother?’
Because the next time he has a knife in his hand and says to himself ‘why bother?’ maybe that next time he’s going to be selfish and really do it. Really kill himself.
It certainly doesn’t seem to matter that I love him. I know he knows. Has probably known since...I don’t know when. Doesn’t matter. He’s my best friend. All I’ve got sometimes.
But it wouldn’t matter, would it? Love certainly isn’t enough to keep him on this plane. The proof is right there in his scarred, burnt hand, his miserable body lying there in pain on this hospital bed. ...Sometimes I find myself thinking I’m the mistress to his curiosity. She’ll always have her hold on him and I’ll always be the one looking in from the sidelines. The rest of the world seems unimportant if there’s no curiosity for him.
When it comes right down to it though, I question whether he could handle the same situation in my position. He could go through any physical pain. That I am sure of. He has faith in the body, in thresholds, in science. That kind of pain wouldn’t matter. I wonder if it would matter if it were me there nearly dead. Would he be able to cope with that? Would it ever hurt him to look at me?
dancinbutterfly suggested 'something from Wilson's POV about the "Just looking at you hurts" line maybe?' Season 4, PG-ish, about 360 words.
What Makes You Stay?
Just looking at you hurts.
I’ve seen him in pain. I’ve seen House trying to cope. Watched him kick, and pretend to kick his addiction. Watched him...hurt. For Stacy, but mostly for himself.
All he does is hurt.
This time, this time it has a higher purpose, though part of me says that’s a joke. House has never believed in the afterlife, and never did I think for one second that he would change his mind about it. With this proof though... This proof that there’s nothing does it mean that maybe he regrets- I mean, does it mean that now he knows he’s right and all there is in the world is pain?
Is this going to justify him being miserable? Justify him stopping any attempt to be happy? I can’t watch him. I can’t watch him simply live with it because he thinks, ‘why bother?’
Because the next time he has a knife in his hand and says to himself ‘why bother?’ maybe that next time he’s going to be selfish and really do it. Really kill himself.
It certainly doesn’t seem to matter that I love him. I know he knows. Has probably known since...I don’t know when. Doesn’t matter. He’s my best friend. All I’ve got sometimes.
But it wouldn’t matter, would it? Love certainly isn’t enough to keep him on this plane. The proof is right there in his scarred, burnt hand, his miserable body lying there in pain on this hospital bed. ...Sometimes I find myself thinking I’m the mistress to his curiosity. She’ll always have her hold on him and I’ll always be the one looking in from the sidelines. The rest of the world seems unimportant if there’s no curiosity for him.
When it comes right down to it though, I question whether he could handle the same situation in my position. He could go through any physical pain. That I am sure of. He has faith in the body, in thresholds, in science. That kind of pain wouldn’t matter. I wonder if it would matter if it were me there nearly dead. Would he be able to cope with that? Would it ever hurt him to look at me?