"But it's soooo hard!" doesn't mean shit when you should be doing your job

[tommykaine]

 
(This is a rant on parents, not on children, so I'm not sure if it's okay to post here. If it isn't, feel free to delete it.)

Is anyone else just SICK of parents using that damn excuse when they can't do their job right?

"But it's haaaard!"

Yeah, it's hard, really?
Well, guess what? Having responsibilities is ALWAYS hard! But when you're a manager, a

Comments

[falconwhitaker]

To answer your question in parentheses, yes, there are. My parents are and have always been good parents because they have always been willing to put in the time and effort to actually parent. Yes, there are many bad, careless or stupid parents out there, but they aren't all like that. I promise.

But I do definitely agree that whining "It's haaaard" is no excuse for bad parenting.

[hello_kirsty]

I hate the parents who say "it's haaard" like they didn't fucking know that BEFORE they had a baby. I've known up always hearing about how parenting is "the hardest job anyone will ever do" (not from my parents, but just in general).

[morgondag]

This. So much.

[pastrywench]

Exactly. I'm not a rabid-child hater (although there are some hellions that can bring that out in me) but I will be the first one to admit that I'm not suitable to raise a kid. Way too temperamental and do not have the patience needed to raise a good kid.

[flawed_karma]

I'd say Bingo, but that's never appreciated in this comm. LOL

I just didn't want the responsibility. Or the sacrifices. That plus other factors (health history, an adult onset disability) made me realize I would not be the kind of parent a child deserves.

Children deserve a firm, loving hand that caresses more than it corrects, one that corrects and caresses with an equal amount of love.

I can't do that. And I tip my hat to people who can.

[shotglass]

For real. Honestly? I big part of my reasoning that goes beyond a simple "I don't want to" is that it's more work than I want to commit to doing for the rest of my life. And I'm not going to kid myself that it's over in 18-21 years, which is still a long time. Kids? Lifelong, money-sucking commitment that may not even like you but will still consume your resources.

That, and the fact that there are so many ways to fuck up. My mom literally thought that forcing me to talk about what I was feeling would be helpful and beneficial to me, because not making my brother talk about them had turned out terribly as well. It turned out she was wrong. I'm not mad at her - she did the best she could. But boy howdy did it give me some issues with feeling my emotions and thoughts are invalid/wrong... a lot. The fact that no matter what you do, no matter how many books you read and how careful you are, you're pretty likely to do at least one thing to fuck your kid up in some way... No thanks.

[longtail]

Parenting is hard in the sense that it's tedious, time consuming, inconvenient, frustrating, exhausting drudgery. It is not hard in the sense it takes to get through grad school, perform brain surgery, calculate rocket science, or do air traffic control.

YES it's hard and frequently not very gratifying. What, you really didn't know that BEFORE you had kids? Why is it *I* could figure that out and you couldn't?

Well then, sucks to you be you. You still have to corral, correct, discipline, care for, and teach your kids to act like civilized human beings. Especially in public. You don't get a free pass because it's hard. Suck it up and take care of your damned kids.

As for the second part: Love is unconditional, life isn't. You have to have both to have a working relationship. Love does NOT conquer all.

And yes, good parents do exist. They are rare, but they are out there.