So, well so what is it, then you feel this unquenchable thirst when it's finally being quenched more than ever before? So yes, that's it. And it's time again to pretend you're amidst a desert --you might as well be-- and to seek nothing and therefore to feel hydrated to your very soul when a quenching rain falls, falls because it has been missing ( Read more... )

I have found that asking one question has helped me to write far more than anything else. I ask: "When is a book written?" and though no single answer is certain to be accurate, at the very least the answer, with certainty, is not "later."

Men have solved far bigger problems with far simpler solutions. Men have been men, before. Why have you never been a man?

So there are the GREs, and there is Grad School. There's my book, there's a short story for journals for grad school, there's school. There's exercise, there's feeding myself, there's maintaining friendships. There's maintaining sanity* when it (my sanity) seems to be in the first place a part of something whose existence is almost contradictory, ( Read more... )

No facebook or youtube for a week. If I cannot maintain that, what sort of person am I?

You know, it sickens me how much advertisers must think the smear of their tactics influences everything. I can just hear them professing how deeply their reach plays a part in the suave collars of button downs in public and private figures alike, the grey New Balances of my hometown streets, the eating habits of us all. I would vouchsafe all of my ( Read more... )

Why does death seem like so much more an 'elemental' force than other events? This is outrageous, it is not supposed to happen at this velocity, that is, this much death-per-year of life. I have now known three kids my age to die, one being the first homicide in DC in 2003, the next drowning in his own puke and the third dying of I don't know what ( Read more... )

You know, there is no questioning that she is correct. To do what she apparently didn't, but which no one can, even still, to do it is to forget the fears and do it. Literally. When the fear begins to arise as by now it is an instinct, destroy it actively.

This is no time for sleep. That would be impossible. Time only to wrap my arms around my shins in the fetal and rock back and forth, and weep with all the worst. If it shall ever be said, which it must, then now. There is an understanding which must be reached. If it needs to be repeated out loud five times a day if it needs to be put on paper ( Read more... )

I must replicate orgasm. Must replicate the ejaculation of tears upon weeping.