Sexist idiocy for the FAIL

[cheshire23]

Yes, obviously it's bad for someone hired as a babysitter to be making kiddie porn with the kids in his "care".However, the correct response to that is NOT to blame the fact that the babysitter was a 20something male, or that he was found via a Craigslist ad. (I do think that references should be checked for a sitter, regardless of age or gender

Comments

[tisiphone]

My thoughts on the matter.

(And yes, it does piss me off that people regard even the minimal amount of involvement Nicolai has with Liv as suspect because after all, he's almost her stepfather and stepfathers abuse preteen girls, amirite? *stabbity*)

[cheshire23]

Yeah. The whole thing pisses me off because ravenshrinkery was 23 when Alex-bit was born, which I suppose makes him suspect as well. (Plus there's the whole crazy thing. OHNOEZ.)

[tisiphone]

Of course it does! After all, what could men possibly want with children other than to do nasty things to them? It's not like they have a stake in the continuation of society or not being killed by their grown and angry offspring or anything.

(I can't even formulate something reasonable on this issue :()

[cheshire23]

*nodnod*

Now, there is an issue with "mother's boyfriend" being the person most likely to be guilty of severe child abuse, but that's a very different situation anyway (and was about to get its own post when I tripped over this piece of stupid). It's usually live-in boyfriends put in charge of kids not their own and having a combination of no ability to cope with AND no understanding of normal baby/young child behavior. A lot of the shaken-baby cases have fit that profile, as did the recent "exorcism" death in Texas and the Nixzmary Brown case. But I think that this is a matter of society not investing in teaching men about child care or child development even more so than it doesn't invest in teaching women.

[prydera]

Ugh... Not cool. And I agree with you about the sexism against men.

BTW if you want more child-porn related rage, have you seen http://www.buffalonews.com/cityregion/story/509797.html ? Honestly, I'm considering writing to the US Attorney involved to explain to him why what he did is, in fact, discriminatory and offensive.

[cheshire23]

GAH! I can understand that logistically a typical prison might be a bad choice, but...they should have house arrest or probation or something. And not say his disability punishes him enough, wtf?

[hermorrine]

I completely agree with you - it IS sexist, not to mention ridiculous. I remember that when I was younger, we had a male teenage babysitter for a while - and I can promise you he didn't do anything untoward to any of the three of us. I remember liking him quite a bit, and my brother in particular seemed to deal better with him.

I have to admit, I've never understood how the parents can be blamed for ANY babysitter abuse, no matter the type. You can check references all you want, but there's always the risk that the jerk hasn't been caught yet. It's got to be scary, period, to be a parent and have to find childcare.

[ravenshrinkery]

It's not as though anyone would be dumb enough to refer people to less-than-glowing references, and those are typically easy enough to find. Three people who like you and think you're a generally decent human being without brain dysfunction that would lead you to harm someone.

Really, the vast majority of people are decent in that they won't commit heinous acts of violence or abuse, and you're right, there is no way to ultimately vet out that part of the population that does these things and hasn't been caught.

[tellinellen]

agreed, on all of it.

and on the blame-the-mother thing, i read something about kids who left the house in the middle of the night and turned up in a parking lot. they were staying with a friend of the family or aunt or something and had escaped the house. the mother, who was in another state at the time i believe, was arrested. !!!!!!!