Do you know who you are REALLY talking to?
The internet. A place that allows you to be whoever you want to be. But in an age where we use dating sites and personal ads, with the hopes of eventually meeting a real life person, face to face, why would anyone want to be anyone else?
Now, I'm not new to the internet. I'm not new to strangers. I'm not new to turning strangers I've met on the internet, into real life friends. In fact, I've had a few relationships come out of meeting strangers on the net. I've made a few life long friends. I've learned where the red flags are over the years, and the only reason I can allow myself to do any of this, is because I WANT to believe that people are inherently good. Sure, I don't trust everyone when I first talk to them, but I really, truly want to.
I'm glad all these years of honing my calling bullshit skills, and my endless need for truth, combined with an unhealthy bit of curiosity, at least made my intuition spark up and say, "something is not right here, and I'm going to figure it out." I'll start from the beginning.
Back in August, I had a bit of a lull where I was just kinda pissed off with the current men in my life, and as I so often do when I'm in this sort of mood, I turned to the internet. I was flitting about on AFF, and I had checked some of the network adds I had received over the past year. I came across a fairly attractive male, whom had sent me a network add almost a year prior. I accepted, and sent him a little flirt to show I was interested. The man had returned my flirt, and sent me a message. We quickly took the correspondence to e-mails, and from there, after a few days and just a few back and forths, to voice one night. We talked on a Friday night. We seemed to have plenty in common, and nothing at all seemed unusual. He broke down all my barriers in that one night. He even made me feel that what I was looking for in a man, was really him. He had to get going so he could meet his buddy at a billiards hall, and left me wanting more. The next day, I got an email from him telling me how great our conversation was, and how he was looking forward to the next one. The next one never came. I didn't hear from him Saturday. I didn't hear from him Sunday. I began to doubt, but then I started to think something had happened to him. Monday, nothing. I had sent a message to his number, and to his e-mail. Tuesday, I got a text in the middle of the day, supposedly from someone getting his affairs in order, informing me, via text... That's right guys, that the man I had been speaking to passed away. How absurd, you might be thinking, for a girl to have met a great guy, been talking to him Friday, and then him wind up dead by Sunday. I couldn't believe it myself. In fact, I cried over it. I cried over a man I would never get to know. I cried over a man that seemed to treat me respectfully, as so many before him had not. I mourned, I grieved. For someone I had never even met in person.
Sounds crazy, right? It gets better. Because none of this made sense to me, I scoured the internet, and I mean SCOURED it, for anything that might give me a clue. Anything that might give me closure. I couldn't find a single thing about an accident. I couldn't find a single thing about anything. I started searching for details he had left me in our conversations. Stuff about his business. I found it, a business page. I hoped that someone there could provide a little closure, because the person I had supposedly heard from in a text message, using this man's phone, also didn't seem to exist. I didn't get a response from the man's business. With no closure at all, I knew I still had to live my life. The months went by. Every now and then, I'd still check out the internet here and there, hoping an obituary would pop up. Or that some information might be posted somewhere. Nothing. Finally, three months later, just this last week, in fact, something. His business page had changed. The domain was new. The e-mail address was new. I tried again to e-mail his company, see if I could finally get that closure I was seeking. This time someone responded.
This time, I was staring at an e-mail from a man named the same name as the man I was told had met an untimely demise. Like some crazy fantasy, a man I had felt a connection with, magically came back to life. Absolutely insane. My brain could not make sense of it. It also couldn't make sense of what I was about to read. The man told me that around the time when I was told of a car accident and death, his work servers were hacked. Someone had stolen from him, and had also assumed his identity for a period of time while he was on vacation. So many questions. And so I asked them, while also explaining the full story I just recounted from the three months before. I asked if we could speak, so I could feel more comfortable knowing that I was not speaking to the same person as before. He agreed. And once again, we finally spoke on a Friday night. Once again, I am writing on a Tuesday. I bet you can't even guess what happens next...
No no, he didn't die again, come on, the same excuse twice? That would just be silly. No. We talked Friday night, a great deal. I was trying to piece it together, I was trying to figure out if he was saying the same things as the first man. And, well, he did. I would tell him that periodically, that I had heard this before, and it was eerie. He would assure me that there was plenty of personal information on the hacked work server. I shrugged it off. I wanted to believe this was someone else. But I was already quite assured in my final opinion that no one had actually died three months ago, I was mostly content with that. Still, I wanted to know if his story was true. Was someone still out there, someone who had made me feel something, then squashed it out with a story of death? Or was I talking to the same man, the same man who had conned me the first time. This time, I went into talking to someone from the internet with far more suspicion. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, but something prevented me from believing all his stories 100%.
Maybe it was the odd hours of phone conversation on both Friday and Saturday, maybe it was that his phone was off (going straight to voice mail) much of the time I called him, maybe it was that he told me parts of his profiles actually weren't true (likely to gain my trust, being honest with me about lying on the internet?) or maybe it was just the way this all had progressed, with a man being interested in me (again), very quickly, and it basically being like a creepy case of deja vu... But I knew something wasn't right. I kept going over the facts in my head. Something wasn't adding up. And the list just kept getting longer.
By Sunday I was ready to call it. Just walk away. I found out what I wanted to know, that someone hadn't died. He hadn't responded to me the entire day, his phone was off. Monday, he e-mailed me a lengthy explanation as to why we had no correspondence Sunday. He told me that he normally goes to church on Sundays if he has sinned a lot the past week. He tried to convince me that if I didn't trust him based on his merits on the here and now, then he has failed as a Dom. (Come on, guy, we've supposedly only known each other one weekend.)
I wasn't writing to him to pick up where a fantasy left off. I was calling to find out what really happened. I wanted to know if his story was true. First a death, then an insurance investigation? I had possibly had some leads, since I had the phone numbers of the guy from before, this guy didn't seem all that interested in that, but gladly told me he would show me a copy of the police report. He wanted to take this face to face as quickly as possible. I told him not until I understood what really happened, not until I get the truth. I told him to get an officer on his case to call me. What he didn't know was that I had called the police, asked if there was any record of this, they said no. But if I had a tip, the person who originally opened the case would have to provide the lead. I still haven't gotten any official calls. But I did receive a very interesting phone call today. Can anyone guess who it was?
It was his wife.
Maybe you can separate your business life from your personal life, but your personal life must be REALLY fucked up if you can't tell the truth to someone who doesn't even know you. So you are married. So what? Are you afraid someone won't sleep with you because of it? Because I promise you, people will. Or maybe you just get off on hiding two people from each other? Maybe three? How many others did you lie to? How many others did you hurt? Is this the type of sadism that gets you off? Seeing how far you can take your ridiculous stories and keep people believing? Who are you really? Eat shit, you sick fuck. You messed with the wrong girl. I hope you go to church this Sunday... You've got plenty to repent for.
Now, I'm not new to the internet. I'm not new to strangers. I'm not new to turning strangers I've met on the internet, into real life friends. In fact, I've had a few relationships come out of meeting strangers on the net. I've made a few life long friends. I've learned where the red flags are over the years, and the only reason I can allow myself to do any of this, is because I WANT to believe that people are inherently good. Sure, I don't trust everyone when I first talk to them, but I really, truly want to.
I'm glad all these years of honing my calling bullshit skills, and my endless need for truth, combined with an unhealthy bit of curiosity, at least made my intuition spark up and say, "something is not right here, and I'm going to figure it out." I'll start from the beginning.
Back in August, I had a bit of a lull where I was just kinda pissed off with the current men in my life, and as I so often do when I'm in this sort of mood, I turned to the internet. I was flitting about on AFF, and I had checked some of the network adds I had received over the past year. I came across a fairly attractive male, whom had sent me a network add almost a year prior. I accepted, and sent him a little flirt to show I was interested. The man had returned my flirt, and sent me a message. We quickly took the correspondence to e-mails, and from there, after a few days and just a few back and forths, to voice one night. We talked on a Friday night. We seemed to have plenty in common, and nothing at all seemed unusual. He broke down all my barriers in that one night. He even made me feel that what I was looking for in a man, was really him. He had to get going so he could meet his buddy at a billiards hall, and left me wanting more. The next day, I got an email from him telling me how great our conversation was, and how he was looking forward to the next one. The next one never came. I didn't hear from him Saturday. I didn't hear from him Sunday. I began to doubt, but then I started to think something had happened to him. Monday, nothing. I had sent a message to his number, and to his e-mail. Tuesday, I got a text in the middle of the day, supposedly from someone getting his affairs in order, informing me, via text... That's right guys, that the man I had been speaking to passed away. How absurd, you might be thinking, for a girl to have met a great guy, been talking to him Friday, and then him wind up dead by Sunday. I couldn't believe it myself. In fact, I cried over it. I cried over a man I would never get to know. I cried over a man that seemed to treat me respectfully, as so many before him had not. I mourned, I grieved. For someone I had never even met in person.
Sounds crazy, right? It gets better. Because none of this made sense to me, I scoured the internet, and I mean SCOURED it, for anything that might give me a clue. Anything that might give me closure. I couldn't find a single thing about an accident. I couldn't find a single thing about anything. I started searching for details he had left me in our conversations. Stuff about his business. I found it, a business page. I hoped that someone there could provide a little closure, because the person I had supposedly heard from in a text message, using this man's phone, also didn't seem to exist. I didn't get a response from the man's business. With no closure at all, I knew I still had to live my life. The months went by. Every now and then, I'd still check out the internet here and there, hoping an obituary would pop up. Or that some information might be posted somewhere. Nothing. Finally, three months later, just this last week, in fact, something. His business page had changed. The domain was new. The e-mail address was new. I tried again to e-mail his company, see if I could finally get that closure I was seeking. This time someone responded.
This time, I was staring at an e-mail from a man named the same name as the man I was told had met an untimely demise. Like some crazy fantasy, a man I had felt a connection with, magically came back to life. Absolutely insane. My brain could not make sense of it. It also couldn't make sense of what I was about to read. The man told me that around the time when I was told of a car accident and death, his work servers were hacked. Someone had stolen from him, and had also assumed his identity for a period of time while he was on vacation. So many questions. And so I asked them, while also explaining the full story I just recounted from the three months before. I asked if we could speak, so I could feel more comfortable knowing that I was not speaking to the same person as before. He agreed. And once again, we finally spoke on a Friday night. Once again, I am writing on a Tuesday. I bet you can't even guess what happens next...
No no, he didn't die again, come on, the same excuse twice? That would just be silly. No. We talked Friday night, a great deal. I was trying to piece it together, I was trying to figure out if he was saying the same things as the first man. And, well, he did. I would tell him that periodically, that I had heard this before, and it was eerie. He would assure me that there was plenty of personal information on the hacked work server. I shrugged it off. I wanted to believe this was someone else. But I was already quite assured in my final opinion that no one had actually died three months ago, I was mostly content with that. Still, I wanted to know if his story was true. Was someone still out there, someone who had made me feel something, then squashed it out with a story of death? Or was I talking to the same man, the same man who had conned me the first time. This time, I went into talking to someone from the internet with far more suspicion. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, but something prevented me from believing all his stories 100%.
Maybe it was the odd hours of phone conversation on both Friday and Saturday, maybe it was that his phone was off (going straight to voice mail) much of the time I called him, maybe it was that he told me parts of his profiles actually weren't true (likely to gain my trust, being honest with me about lying on the internet?) or maybe it was just the way this all had progressed, with a man being interested in me (again), very quickly, and it basically being like a creepy case of deja vu... But I knew something wasn't right. I kept going over the facts in my head. Something wasn't adding up. And the list just kept getting longer.
By Sunday I was ready to call it. Just walk away. I found out what I wanted to know, that someone hadn't died. He hadn't responded to me the entire day, his phone was off. Monday, he e-mailed me a lengthy explanation as to why we had no correspondence Sunday. He told me that he normally goes to church on Sundays if he has sinned a lot the past week. He tried to convince me that if I didn't trust him based on his merits on the here and now, then he has failed as a Dom. (Come on, guy, we've supposedly only known each other one weekend.)
I wasn't writing to him to pick up where a fantasy left off. I was calling to find out what really happened. I wanted to know if his story was true. First a death, then an insurance investigation? I had possibly had some leads, since I had the phone numbers of the guy from before, this guy didn't seem all that interested in that, but gladly told me he would show me a copy of the police report. He wanted to take this face to face as quickly as possible. I told him not until I understood what really happened, not until I get the truth. I told him to get an officer on his case to call me. What he didn't know was that I had called the police, asked if there was any record of this, they said no. But if I had a tip, the person who originally opened the case would have to provide the lead. I still haven't gotten any official calls. But I did receive a very interesting phone call today. Can anyone guess who it was?
It was his wife.
Maybe you can separate your business life from your personal life, but your personal life must be REALLY fucked up if you can't tell the truth to someone who doesn't even know you. So you are married. So what? Are you afraid someone won't sleep with you because of it? Because I promise you, people will. Or maybe you just get off on hiding two people from each other? Maybe three? How many others did you lie to? How many others did you hurt? Is this the type of sadism that gets you off? Seeing how far you can take your ridiculous stories and keep people believing? Who are you really? Eat shit, you sick fuck. You messed with the wrong girl. I hope you go to church this Sunday... You've got plenty to repent for.