Tug Tip #14: If Tug is sick, please do not touch him, for you make him extremely, extremely angry ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #13: If you see a guy wearing a Hawaiian-ish t shirt and looks kind of Hawaiian, but you think he's a tourist and you mess with him and shit, don't. He's not really a tourist, he is an angry Polynesian dude ready to explode on you like Mauna Loa ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #12: Don't underestimate a fat kid like myself. I will beat you in anything ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #11: Do not ever order food from China Star in Rockland, Mass ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #10: If you can't love yourself, shoot yourself ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #9: Write lyrics based on emotion, not because you have to ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #8: Being skinny = boyfriends/girlfriends & lots of shit. Being fat = lazyness, not being able to fit in amusement park rides, and jack shit ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #7: If you're gonna make a delivery driver drive all the way out to fucking Westport, Rehoboth, or NORTH DARTMOUTH, make the tip worth it, Pegasus ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #6: Make sure you stretch before lifting ( Read more... )

Tug Tip #5: Be nice. People don't like to be upset ( Read more... )