Rabbi Jim talked about why Jonah. I'm doing this from memory. He noted how on Yom Kippur the portions become more grave. YK Morning you have the "choose life", with the Haftorah from Isaiah indicating it is not a meaningless fast that's wanted. Then you have the ten commandments in the afternoon. He noted this is a pretty high bar to achieve.
Then we have Jonah, who hammers home the point that even the lowly among us can achieve good. Here you have someone who tries to abdict all their responsibility, worrying about their name. Yet 5-6 words from him can turn a city around. If he can do it, then why can't we.
10 Commandments?magidSeptember 26 2004, 20:29:17 UTC
That's not what we read at my shul Y"K at mincha; it's all the forbidden relationships (married to two sisters at once, marrying your aunt, etc etc etc).
Is it usually done late in the day on Yom Kippur? It's done right after Torah reading, before the Ashrei that begins the process of returning the sefer Torah, just like the other times of year. I'm surprised you have it so late in the day, especially if there are more people in the morning.
We get a bunch of people who come back for yizkor. I suspect that this is a subtle attempt to get them to be there for ne'ilah, but I'm not certain. Thanks for the info.
(The beit midrash is a blatant attempt to get people to just stay all day, in case you're wondering.)
Some flavours of Christianity still recognise the Requiem, the Mass for the departed soul, not only as a burial service, but also at prescribed times during mourning and possibly, indefinitely after that.
Being Mass, it is not something one does, like kaddish, though. It requires ordained clergy, and thus, a payment is considered appropriate. A Requiem service that I have paid for is considered as valid whether I am present at the Mass or not.
Thanks. I didn't know that the requiem was said at times other than the burial.
I have the impression that some Roman Catholics of my grandparents' generation light memorial candles in church at certain times of the year. I don't know if there are particular prayers that are associated with this, but I wouldn't be surprised. I don't know any details, though, and I don't know if it's still done.
Going back to my apartment wasn't really a problem for me this year. I suppose this is one area where it actually helps that I have a studio. See, I have this table which has two wings which fold down. So it can be (and usually is) a bit over 5 feet long and about 3 feet wide, but can fold down to just one foot "long". Since I wasn't using it for Yom Kippur anyhow (Joy and I ate dinner at a restaurant before the fast, and went to a friend's for break-fast), I folded it all the way down... and it made a change in the room. Also, by the time that services ended (around 3:30pm?), we were both so exhausted that we pretty much just collapsed when we got back...
>> My parents do not share my religion and I can imagine that there could be things they would ask me to do to honor their memory that I simply cannot do. This case is different, but it got me thinking
( ... )
On parents: I should clarify that I can imagine that there are things within their tradition that I find objectionable. My parents are very reasonable people and don't tend to surprise people with serious stuff, so if they asked me to do something that would be problematic, we'd discuss it and they would (I expect) withdraw the request. I don't expect to be surprised by deathbed instructions.
I don't envy you your situation. Do you have siblings? If so, would any of them be suitable as exeuctor so that you can just avoid the situation?
I'm kind of surprised by your rabbi's response. At the time of loss, when (1) your emotional state is presumably not great and (2) things have to happen quickly, seems to be the worst time to consider the question. Unless that's his point -- that he needs to evaluate the specific effect on you at that time, or something like that.
I guess they can be described as synonyms in terms of all the words standing for a vow of some sort, but from what I know, they're all different types of vows. I can
( ... )
>> I don't envy you your situation. Do you have siblings? If so, would any of them be suitable as exeuctor so that you can just avoid the situation
( ... )
I do have a younger sister, but Mom appointed me as executor
I have a younger sister too but I, too, am the named exeuctor. In our case, family consensus is that I am better able to maintain a level head in a crisis. Nothing against my sister -- just that I'm likely to handle it better.
To be honest, this was the straw that broke the camel's back years ago when I was checking out a Reconstructionist congregation.
I think the thing I found most difficult at Reconstructionist services was the changes to time-honored liturgy, Hebrew and English. It wasn't specifically the gender thing so much as that certain phrases are just ingrained for me and they changed them in ways that struck me as gratuitious. They had their reasons, of course, and I'm not saying they shouldn't (Reform has done some of that too, after all), but the changes make it difficult for me to pray.
Thanks for all the information on vows! Some of those differences do seem subtle, so I'm not surprised that Dani (who doesn't geek out on this stuff) missed them.
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Then we have Jonah, who hammers home the point that even the lowly among us can achieve good. Here you have someone who tries to abdict all their responsibility, worrying about their name. Yet 5-6 words from him can turn a city around. If he can do it, then why can't we.
I hope I remembered it right.
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However, the end point still remains.
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The Reform movement doesn't read the forbidden relationships on Yom Kippur. We read from Nitzavim at shacharit and Kedoshim at mincha.
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It's done right after Torah reading, before the Ashrei that begins the process of returning the sefer Torah, just like the other times of year. I'm surprised you have it so late in the day, especially if there are more people in the morning.
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(The beit midrash is a blatant attempt to get people to just stay all day, in case you're wondering.)
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Being Mass, it is not something one does, like kaddish, though. It requires ordained clergy, and thus, a payment is considered appropriate. A Requiem service that I have paid for is considered as valid whether I am present at the Mass or not.
Not an exact parallel, though.
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I have the impression that some Roman Catholics of my grandparents' generation light memorial candles in church at certain times of the year. I don't know if there are particular prayers that are associated with this, but I wouldn't be surprised. I don't know any details, though, and I don't know if it's still done.
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I'm glad you had a meaningful holy day.
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I don't envy you your situation. Do you have siblings? If so, would any of them be suitable as exeuctor so that you can just avoid the situation?
I'm kind of surprised by your rabbi's response. At the time of loss, when (1) your emotional state is presumably not great and (2) things have to happen quickly, seems to be the worst time to consider the question. Unless that's his point -- that he needs to evaluate the specific effect on you at that time, or something like that.
I guess they can be described as synonyms in terms of all the words standing for a vow of some sort, but from what I know, they're all different types of vows. I can ( ... )
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I have a younger sister too but I, too, am the named exeuctor. In our case, family consensus is that I am better able to maintain a level head in a crisis. Nothing against my sister -- just that I'm likely to handle it better.
To be honest, this was the straw that broke the camel's back years ago when I was checking out a Reconstructionist congregation.
I think the thing I found most difficult at Reconstructionist services was the changes to time-honored liturgy, Hebrew and English. It wasn't specifically the gender thing so much as that certain phrases are just ingrained for me and they changed them in ways that struck me as gratuitious. They had their reasons, of course, and I'm not saying they shouldn't (Reform has done some of that too, after all), but the changes make it difficult for me to pray.
Thanks for all the information on vows! Some of those differences do seem subtle, so I'm not surprised that Dani (who doesn't geek out on this stuff) missed them.
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