[open] mama we all go to hell

[mostcraftiest]

Curufin is not at his best right now. Of course, he has not really been at his best since arriving here, in one way or another, but just the same. Since being driven back inside (as he thinks of it) by Caranthir, he's locked himself in his room and pretty much hasn't stopped pacing.

And it's not just restlessness and pent up energy, either; he

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[mostcraftiest]

There is a rather abrupt halt to the (by now resumed) pacing behind the door, as Curufin takes a few moments to consider. Not answer? Cowardly. But he has no wish to face his relatives again, and the last conversation was - less than pleasant.

However, he will not be a coward. "Nelyo," his voice mostly usual, although there is an undercurrent of strain that may not have been there before. "Is there something you want?"

[mostcraftiest]

No, he wants to say, rather snippily, no you may not, but he is still above that. A long suffering sigh, instead. "Is it so much to ask," mildly, or mostly mildly, "That I be left to my privacy for a few moments?"

But there's no getting out of it now, and he opens the door, if briefly. "What can possibly be so important that it can't wait?"

Of course, there is not really any hiding the narrowness of his face, or the fever-like brightness of his eyes. When you're Curu, two ends just isn't enough; it's got to be all three.

[ringsmith]

At some point, when Curufin has to venture out for food, his path might cross with his son's in the kitchen. Cele isn't in the best of moods after learning about what occured between his father and his girlfriend but at least he caught a bit of a nap on the cot in his forge and now he's looking for something to eat.

When he sees his father through he freezes, startled, because this isn't what he wants to happen right now, and at some point in the night he's managed to convince himself that this might make his father reject him even more...well, we never said he was the most rational being in the mansion.

[mostcraftiest]

Well, he has to emerge from his hideaway retreat room sometime to eat, as he has been telling the truth and isn't actively trying to be self-destructive, it just kind of happens when he is spending all of his time thinking rather than other small necessities like sleeping and things.

The change in his father is probably apparent to Cele, if he notices or thinks to look for such a thing - he's lost weight, most apparently in his face, which is narrower, slightly drawn the way it gets when he's under some great stress.

However, the freezing, actually, shakes him out of the reverie, and he looks up sharply, eyes too bright, and then looks, just for a moment as though there is some kind of inexorable trap closing and he can see it.

A moment later his face is smooth again, but he says nothing as with a slight nod he turns to leave. He said he would not trouble him again. He said- oh Eru, don't think.

[ringsmith]

Cele does notice, though it may take him a moment. His eyes widen slightly in surprise at the look Curufin gives him, and he's stunned when all his father does is nod slightly and turn to leave. As Curu turns Cele takes a breath as if to call after him, but can't quite make any sound come out of his throat.

[mostcraftiest]

As he told Pan, and Cara, and everyone who has even thought about asking him about where things stand with Cele, as far as he is concerned, they have nothing left to say to each other. And he does not want the opportunity to be further humiliated, does not want to be rejected again, doesn't want to be faced with his son when he keeps seeing - this was never what he wanted.

He rolls his shoulders once, still making like to go. Though he might pause, briefly, even if back turned Cele can't see him close his eyes for a moment and sigh, barely.

But there is no such thing as apologies, and he will not subject himself to another round of the last time.

[seasideminstrel]

At some point there is a knock on the door, unobtrusive. Maglor would be sorry to interrupt if he knew what was going on, but he doesn't know a thing, only perhaps found out where the brother he hasn't seen yet lives and gone to seek him.

"Curvo, are you home?"

[mostcraftiest]

Stops dead in his pacing - which might be audible - and there is a long silence as once again he goes through the internal debate of whether he answers the door and deals with the questions, or doesn't answer the door and lets him come back later - but he will come back later.

He's never before wished that he didn't have quite so many brothers. They seem to all be determined to come trooping into his privacy. Open door, leaning on the doorframe, body language clear of 'no you cannot come in.' "Where else would I be, Cano?"

He doesn't seem terribly surprised, or terribly pleased, or terribly anything, really. His expression remains masterfully neutral.

[seasideminstrel]

He can accept staying outside, as long as there is no outright rejection.

"There is enough space to be elsewhere," he says calmly. "Enough for us to not cross paths until now, at any rate. I wanted to see you - is that so unusual? It has been a long time, brother. How have you been?"

His voice and expression remain guileless. There is joy there, certainly, but not too much. He knows how this brother thinks about emotion, after all.

[mostcraftiest]

Brothers, Curufin thinks. They cannot take a hint when it comes up and smacks them in the face. At least this one is marginally more polite. 'Fairly unusual,' he doesn't quite comment, because that would be petulant and he is going to be better than that. "Well enough, though I don't believe it's been nearly so long for me as it has for you, so that should be my question to ask."

The slightly closed and suspicious expression is - fairly usual, although perhaps slightly more pronounced than a good day. There are good days. Sometimes.