Fic: Sensory (The Forsaken, Nick/Sean, R)
Title: Sensory
Fandom: The Forsaken
Pairing: Nick/Sean
Rating: R
Summary: Post-movie. Nick explores the senses.
A/N: I don't really have time for writing today, and if I'm going to take the time to write, it certainly shouldn't be this. But this is what wanted to be written, so here we are. I'm currently experiencing an upsurge in old fandom love. It's kind of nice, actually.
There were things Nick kind of missed about being infected. He'd never say so out loud - not in front of Sean, anyway - and it wasn't like he missed it so much he wanted some other loser to bite him, but every so often he kind of missed some of the side effects.
Like the heightened senses, because those kind of kicked ass. Not the psychic link to the undead so much, but the heightened sense of touch and the sense of smell…those were kind of nice. They made everything just a little more vivid, a little more intense. And he always thought getting rid of the virus would make everything feel better, but sometimes he wished he could still feel the way he had when he was sick.
He'd liked being able to pick Sean out of a crowded restaurant just by sniffing the air, liked the way Sean's hands on his skin used to feel like fire running through his veins. He missed the way things tasted back then, from food to air to Sean's tongue in his mouth. He'd liked all of that, and even though he was glad he wasn't going to die after all, he sort of wished the trade-off hadn't been so big.
He could still taste, still felt even the lightest of touches, and he could still pick out Sean's scent when he got close enough, but it wasn't the same. He had to work at it now, had to focus and push and demand more of his body than he ever had when he was only half alive. And it was funny, because he should have felt less while he was dying, but once he was back to being only human he remembered all too well just how much time most people spent walking around like they were already dead inside.
It was a waste, and it made him kind of sick to think about it. To watch all the people in L.A. just wandering around like walking corpses, going through the motions without really feeling…anything. It was depressing, and it usually made him want to hit the road and keep going until he found someplace without any people at all.
Except that would mean leaving Sean behind, and that was the one sacrifice Nick wasn't willing to make. They'd fought way too hard to stay together, and at least when they were alone Nick could feel as much as he wanted to.
Because Sean never questioned him when Nick asked for more, when he demanded that Sean press harder, with his hands and his mouth and his dick. Sean never said anything about the bruises, just ran his fingers over them as they formed and that was great, that was perfect because the tender skin was even more sensitive and Nick always shivered at Sean's touch.
So maybe Sean understood, at least a little. Maybe he didn't need to hear Nick explain what he needed, because he'd been infected and even though it didn't last long, he had to remember how it felt. Had to miss it just a little, when he was hot and hard and desperate for just a little more, just that extra push to send him over the edge. That was how Nick used to feel all the time, and maybe Sean understood why he missed it so much.
Understood why Nick buried his face in Sean's neck and just breathed, in and out so deep that it made him light-headed. Filling his senses with Sean, with that scent he'd know anywhere and used to get so overwhelmed by that even if he hadn't already wanted Sean he never would have been able to resist him. He spent every night wrapped up in that scent, after all, even before they started sleeping together.
Even back then he couldn't get enough, and now…now he just had to work a little harder to get what he needed. Push a little more, and Sean must have understood, because he always pushed right back. Left the marks on Nick's skin and never complained when Nick marked him too, didn't say a word about the dark bruises on his neck and a couple times Nick had even caught him standing in the bathroom mirror, watching his fingers as they traced the shapes left by Nick's mouth.
He knew it wasn't normal. Knew they weren't normal, but how could they be when they'd both had immortality handed to them on a platter and given it right back. And that was another thing he wondered about sometimes; wondered what would happen if they both turned, if they would have stayed together or if the virus would have made them forget what they meant to each other. Made them forget promises whispered in the dead of night when they were both too exhausted to hold it in anymore, made them forget why they were fighting so hard to keep Nick alive.
Because it wasn't like his life had been worth saving before he met Sean, and there had been a few times when he thought about giving up. But he kept going because he didn't have anything else to do, and once Sean tracked him down…well, that gave him a reason to fight. So he wanted to believe that would have been enough to keep them together even if they hadn't found his Forsaken, but he was just as glad they were never going to find out. And if it meant he had to work a little harder to feel things, it was a sacrifice worth making.
"Hey."
Sean's voice, lips pressed up against his ear so the word buzzed against his skin, and Nick wasn't sure if he did that because he knew Nick needed to feel it, or if he was just trying to make himself heard over the noise of the crowded bar. "You look like you wanna get out of here."
Sometimes, like now, he thought Sean could read his mind. Thought maybe Sean could take one look at him and know exactly what he was thinking, know how much he hated being around all these people who were barely alive and didn't even know how numb they were. But he knew better, knew Sean was just offering to take him home and fuck him until they both passed out. Which was a lot better than hanging out in some bar - a lot better than a lot of things - so Nick nodded and drained the rest of his beer. "Yeah."
He gripped Sean's hand as they wove their way through the crowd, holding on tight until they were through the front door and out onto the mostly deserted sidewalk. Nick gulped lungfuls of fresh air until he felt a little lightheaded, still holding onto Sean's hand because he had a feeling if he didn't he'd sink to his knees.
And maybe Sean could read his mind after all, because he slid an arm around Nick's shoulders to lead him toward their car. "Maybe we should get out of the city for awhile," Sean said, fumbling in his pocket for the keys. "Find someplace without so many people."
That definitely wasn't Sean talking, because as long as Nick had known him he'd loved the city. Loved the noise and the bustle and all the people crawling all over each other trying to win some race even though they didn't know what the prize was. So the only explanation Nick could come up with was that Sean really was a mind reader.
Maybe it was a side effect of the virus; maybe they were connected in some crazy way, even though they hadn't shared the same Forsaken. Or maybe Sean just knew him better than anyone in the world, knew exactly what he needed and wanted to give it to him. And that was a concept he was still getting used to, but he didn't mind trying.
"Yeah," Nick said, stopping as they reached the car to tug Sean toward him, "I could stand a vacation."
"Seedy motel room, bad diner food."
"Sounds pretty perfect to me."
Sean grinned at him, then he leaned in for a kiss that Nick felt all the way down to his toes.
Fandom: The Forsaken
Pairing: Nick/Sean
Rating: R
Summary: Post-movie. Nick explores the senses.
A/N: I don't really have time for writing today, and if I'm going to take the time to write, it certainly shouldn't be this. But this is what wanted to be written, so here we are. I'm currently experiencing an upsurge in old fandom love. It's kind of nice, actually.
There were things Nick kind of missed about being infected. He'd never say so out loud - not in front of Sean, anyway - and it wasn't like he missed it so much he wanted some other loser to bite him, but every so often he kind of missed some of the side effects.
Like the heightened senses, because those kind of kicked ass. Not the psychic link to the undead so much, but the heightened sense of touch and the sense of smell…those were kind of nice. They made everything just a little more vivid, a little more intense. And he always thought getting rid of the virus would make everything feel better, but sometimes he wished he could still feel the way he had when he was sick.
He'd liked being able to pick Sean out of a crowded restaurant just by sniffing the air, liked the way Sean's hands on his skin used to feel like fire running through his veins. He missed the way things tasted back then, from food to air to Sean's tongue in his mouth. He'd liked all of that, and even though he was glad he wasn't going to die after all, he sort of wished the trade-off hadn't been so big.
He could still taste, still felt even the lightest of touches, and he could still pick out Sean's scent when he got close enough, but it wasn't the same. He had to work at it now, had to focus and push and demand more of his body than he ever had when he was only half alive. And it was funny, because he should have felt less while he was dying, but once he was back to being only human he remembered all too well just how much time most people spent walking around like they were already dead inside.
It was a waste, and it made him kind of sick to think about it. To watch all the people in L.A. just wandering around like walking corpses, going through the motions without really feeling…anything. It was depressing, and it usually made him want to hit the road and keep going until he found someplace without any people at all.
Except that would mean leaving Sean behind, and that was the one sacrifice Nick wasn't willing to make. They'd fought way too hard to stay together, and at least when they were alone Nick could feel as much as he wanted to.
Because Sean never questioned him when Nick asked for more, when he demanded that Sean press harder, with his hands and his mouth and his dick. Sean never said anything about the bruises, just ran his fingers over them as they formed and that was great, that was perfect because the tender skin was even more sensitive and Nick always shivered at Sean's touch.
So maybe Sean understood, at least a little. Maybe he didn't need to hear Nick explain what he needed, because he'd been infected and even though it didn't last long, he had to remember how it felt. Had to miss it just a little, when he was hot and hard and desperate for just a little more, just that extra push to send him over the edge. That was how Nick used to feel all the time, and maybe Sean understood why he missed it so much.
Understood why Nick buried his face in Sean's neck and just breathed, in and out so deep that it made him light-headed. Filling his senses with Sean, with that scent he'd know anywhere and used to get so overwhelmed by that even if he hadn't already wanted Sean he never would have been able to resist him. He spent every night wrapped up in that scent, after all, even before they started sleeping together.
Even back then he couldn't get enough, and now…now he just had to work a little harder to get what he needed. Push a little more, and Sean must have understood, because he always pushed right back. Left the marks on Nick's skin and never complained when Nick marked him too, didn't say a word about the dark bruises on his neck and a couple times Nick had even caught him standing in the bathroom mirror, watching his fingers as they traced the shapes left by Nick's mouth.
He knew it wasn't normal. Knew they weren't normal, but how could they be when they'd both had immortality handed to them on a platter and given it right back. And that was another thing he wondered about sometimes; wondered what would happen if they both turned, if they would have stayed together or if the virus would have made them forget what they meant to each other. Made them forget promises whispered in the dead of night when they were both too exhausted to hold it in anymore, made them forget why they were fighting so hard to keep Nick alive.
Because it wasn't like his life had been worth saving before he met Sean, and there had been a few times when he thought about giving up. But he kept going because he didn't have anything else to do, and once Sean tracked him down…well, that gave him a reason to fight. So he wanted to believe that would have been enough to keep them together even if they hadn't found his Forsaken, but he was just as glad they were never going to find out. And if it meant he had to work a little harder to feel things, it was a sacrifice worth making.
"Hey."
Sean's voice, lips pressed up against his ear so the word buzzed against his skin, and Nick wasn't sure if he did that because he knew Nick needed to feel it, or if he was just trying to make himself heard over the noise of the crowded bar. "You look like you wanna get out of here."
Sometimes, like now, he thought Sean could read his mind. Thought maybe Sean could take one look at him and know exactly what he was thinking, know how much he hated being around all these people who were barely alive and didn't even know how numb they were. But he knew better, knew Sean was just offering to take him home and fuck him until they both passed out. Which was a lot better than hanging out in some bar - a lot better than a lot of things - so Nick nodded and drained the rest of his beer. "Yeah."
He gripped Sean's hand as they wove their way through the crowd, holding on tight until they were through the front door and out onto the mostly deserted sidewalk. Nick gulped lungfuls of fresh air until he felt a little lightheaded, still holding onto Sean's hand because he had a feeling if he didn't he'd sink to his knees.
And maybe Sean could read his mind after all, because he slid an arm around Nick's shoulders to lead him toward their car. "Maybe we should get out of the city for awhile," Sean said, fumbling in his pocket for the keys. "Find someplace without so many people."
That definitely wasn't Sean talking, because as long as Nick had known him he'd loved the city. Loved the noise and the bustle and all the people crawling all over each other trying to win some race even though they didn't know what the prize was. So the only explanation Nick could come up with was that Sean really was a mind reader.
Maybe it was a side effect of the virus; maybe they were connected in some crazy way, even though they hadn't shared the same Forsaken. Or maybe Sean just knew him better than anyone in the world, knew exactly what he needed and wanted to give it to him. And that was a concept he was still getting used to, but he didn't mind trying.
"Yeah," Nick said, stopping as they reached the car to tug Sean toward him, "I could stand a vacation."
"Seedy motel room, bad diner food."
"Sounds pretty perfect to me."
Sean grinned at him, then he leaned in for a kiss that Nick felt all the way down to his toes.