It's been another bad day and for the first time in years, I am having the urge to write again and just get my feelings down... even if no one is listening
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I'm so sorry you're going through all of this and that your support system is inadequate. And I'm particularly sorry about the stuff with your dad. When it comes to parents it's amazing how deep the hurt runs and how far back the memories stretch, all freling like yesterday.
Jsyk, meds don't necessarily have to leave you numb. Some definitely will, but there's a good chance there's another AD out there that won't have that effect. It's a trial and error thing, sadly, but you don't have to settle for numb. Anyway I have been on a parade and a half of psych meds/antidepressants, so any advice you need, feel free.
I'm so sorry you are going through this I wish there was something I could do. Know that you're not writing into silence, I check LJ daily (not sure why, everyone is sporadic to the extreme with updates including me!) so I read everything.
You deserve caring & supportive friends that are willing to openly talk to you as you are to them, even if you think you should settle for what you can get. It's so difficult when people aren't there how you need them. Then, you begin questioning yourself. Like, am I the one expecting too much from others? It's not a very pleasant mindframe. I guess I just want you to know you deserve genuine care and empathy from others including your father. I'm glad you have the self-awareness to see that where your dad is coming from may not always be from the most understanding place and that this isn't about you at all but his own struggles. (Once again, I may be speaking from my own selfish place with these thoughts here too. I just feel I can relate, I guess
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Just popping in to say hi. I hadn't been in in awhile myself and came back to check LJ and saw that your Birthday happened :D *hugs* - i hope things are looking up for you.
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Jsyk, meds don't necessarily have to leave you numb. Some definitely will, but there's a good chance there's another AD out there that won't have that effect. It's a trial and error thing, sadly, but you don't have to settle for numb. Anyway I have been on a parade and a half of psych meds/antidepressants, so any advice you need, feel free.
I'm rooting for you.
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I'm so sorry you are going through this I wish there was something I could do. Know that you're not writing into silence, I check LJ daily (not sure why, everyone is sporadic to the extreme with updates including me!) so I read everything.
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