FFDQ 2011-04: I'LL TAKE SWORDS FOR 500

Feb 08, 2011 20:57

YOU AND ALL OF YOUR S-WORDS ROCK THIS ROUND. HERE WE GO!

1. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT THE SWORD WAKKA GIVES TIDUS AT THE BEGINNING OF FFX?

"SPLOOSH SPLOOSH SPLISHY SPLASHY I'M MADE OF WATER DO I REMIND YOU OF BEING A WATER-JOCK YET?" - SALARTA

"IT'S CALLED THE ISWORD. IT'S WIFI, 4G, TAKES HI-DEF PICTURES AND CAN PLAY PLANTS VS. ZOMBIES. THE ONLY THING IT CAN'T DO IS CUT THINGS." - KRISTINMACHINA

"THE ENGRAVING IN THE POMMEL: "MADE IN HONG KONG"" - CHAOSVIZIER

"IT IS SECRETLY A LAVA LAMP." - PAPERCLIPCHAINS

"IT ALLOWS TIDUS TO CHARGE HIS OVERDRIVE WITH TEENAGE ANGST. THE DOWNSIDE IS THAT ITS ATTACK LEVEL IS POWERED BY OVERLY EMOTIONAL TEENAGE POETRY, AND TIDUS IS NOT VERY GOOD AT RHYMING - HENCE WHY HE UPGRADES TO BETTER WEAPONS LATER." - SARGENT_SNARKY

"IT IS AN ETERNAL SYMBOL OF THEIR BROMANCE" - ZEKKASS

"IT'S ALL ABOUT THE BROMANCE. BROTHERHOOD = BROMANCE. GET IT? /GETS SHOT" - SHODRIVE

"IT'S BIG. AND LONG. AND MAKES YUNA GO "OOH"." - ALEYCA

"IT CAME WITH ITS OWN PACK OF TROJANS. REMEMBER, SAFE BUTTSEX IS THE BEST BUTTSEX." - VENEFICA_AURA

2. WHAT SPECIAL MOVE CAN STEINER AND VIVI EXECUTE?

"CROSS SWORDS, WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE" - IXMYTHOT

"THE TRIPLE LUTZ. STEINER GOT THE GOLD MEDAL IN '96, BUT VIVI WAS TOO "ITALIAN" FOR THE RUSSIAN JUDGE AND THEY GYPPED HER HALF A POINT." - CHAOSVIZIER

"SYNCHRONIZED DANCE ROUTINE. EQUIPPING DIFFERENT ACCESSORIES WILL YIELD DIFFERENT DANCES (THOUGH YOU HAVE TO TALK TO MOG TO UNLOCK THE BEST ONES). THE ONE YOU GET WITH STEINER WEARING THE FEATHER BOA IS SIMPLY ~*~FABULOUS~*~, WHILE THE ONE YOU GET WHEN YOU GIVE VIVI THE PASTIES IS JUST CONFUSING." - SARGENT_SNARKY

"WONDER TWINS POWER ACTIVATE IN THE FORM OF-- WAIT, WE AREN'T TWINS AT ALL." - GOOGLYMOOGLIES

"WITH THEIR POWERS COMBINED, THEY ARE THAT GUY." - VENEFICA_AURA

3. WHAT IS THE NAME OF SEIFER'S GUNBLADE?

"DOUCHEBAG" - IXMYTHOT

"OVERCOMPENSATION" - ZEKKASS

"VERA" - VIOLETTANGO

"MY GUNBLADE HAD A FIRST NAME, IT'S R-I-N-O-A..." - KRISTINMACHINA

"MAYBE I'M A CHICKENWUSS *EPIC XYLOPHONE RIFFS*" - SALARTA

"CAPTAIN SHINY. HE ALSO SLEEPS WITH IT EVERY NIGHT." - GOOGLYMOOGLIES

"THE HAMMER. NO WAIT, THE HAMMER IS HIS PENIS." - VENEFICA_AURA

4. WHAT IS THE ATMA WEAPON?

"ALSO CALLED THE ULTIMA WEAPON IN FFVI AND SOMETIMES KICKED MY ASS!" - GARGOULE

"WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S CERTAINLY NOT A LIGHTSABER, THERE'D NEVER BE A LIGHTSABER IN A FINAL FANTASY GAME, NO SIR, NOT ONE BIT!" - IXMYTHOT

"PROOF THAT TERRA IS A JEDI. THESE ARE NOT THE ESPERS YOU ARE LOOKING FOR." - SARGENT_SNARKY

"THE WAVE MOTION GUN. "ATMA" IS JUST THE MIDDLE LETTERS OF "YAMATO" REARRANGED. LEAVING OUT THE "YO" JUST MEANS THAT PEOPLE FROM BROOKLYN ARE IMMUNE TO ITS EFFECTS." - CHAOZVIZIER

"NORMALLY, IT WOULD BE THE MOST POWERFUL WEAPON IN FFVI, BUT WHEN TERRA AND HER COMPANIONS LEARN THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP AND LOVE, ITS POWER DOES NOT COMPARE. UNLESS YOU PUT A MISSILE LAUNCHER ON IT, OF COURSE." - VIOLETTANGO

5. WHEN CECIL REACHES THE TOP OF MOUNT ORDEALS, WHAT IS HE GIVEN?

"ZOMBIE AIDS. LOTS OF ZOMBIE AIDS. THEN A BACK SCRATCH FROM SCARMIGLIONE BEFORE HIS DAD GIVES HIM A HOLY WANG." - SALARTA

"A NUDE PICTURE OF ROSA" - ALEYCA

"A COOKIE. HEY THIS IS MOUNT ORDEALS I'D WANT A COOKIE TOO." - VENEFICA_AURA

"GOLD BOND MEDICATED POWDER. 'CAUSE HIS DOGS HAVE GOTTA BE BARKIN'." - KRISTINMACHINA

"IMO THE ANSWER TO ALL OF THESE IS "DICKS" BUT THAT'S JUST ME" - dr4win9f00l

ffdq 2011, this post is a cock joke

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