GOD THAT MOVIE SUCKED ASS
INITIAL REACTION POST. THIS WAS PROBABLY POINTLESS BUT W/E
THIS REVIEW BROUGHT TO YOU BY OZAI'S HOLY GLOWING ASS
PS POSE STOLEN FROM JESUS, THOUGH THAT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS
Anyway, I'm stopping with the capslock because it's a bitch to read. That and the movie wasn't even CAPSLOCK enjoyable. I'm glad I didn't pay for it because I already feel ripped off. And I'm not really all that pissed off at it; it was too boringly bad, but I promised you guys a review.
Honestly, I don't know if this was a worse movie or adaptation. I'd say it was a wholly superficial adaptation, but it wasn't even that. There's honestly no need to nitpick this shit because all the big important things have been changed. And most importantly, it completely lacks the spirit of the original show. Like, right now I'm watching HP and the Prisoner of Azkaban (because I needed to watch something that's actually good). POA is not the most faithful of adaptations when it comes to details, but oh man it gets the spirit of Harry Potter so damn well while being it's own thing. The Last Airbender completely fails at that. It just feel boring and uninspired. I couldn't give a crap about anyone in the movie or anything that was happening. Neither could anyone else that saw it - fans and nonfans alike. We fans had to convince a few people that the show was actually worth watching because this movie was so fucking bad.
CHARACTERS
AANG: Aang was kinda cheerful at the beginning, but not like :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. After that he was serious pretty much all the damn time. I don't really want to say anything about his acting because he's just a kid, but there is no possible way he was better than every Asian-American child actor that auditioned. I'll just leave it at that. Maybe it was just the crappy direction.
SOAK-AH: Ok. After watching Eclipse and this, it is my conclusion that Jackson Rathbone cannot act. Just goddamn, he's no different in this movie than in Eclipse. All he does is stare at stuff and be ~srs~ and ~dramatic~
KATARA: First off the acting: once again, I don't want to smack talk a kid. Nicola's acting was about what I expected out of a child actor, but she wasn't an amazing prodigy that "deserved" the role that should have gone to a Native American child actor. As for the writing, I can't even begin. . .what they did to Katara is completely inexcusable. She's pathetic. She spends the whole time on the verge of tears and barely does jack shit in this movie. She doesn't grapple with the sexism of the Northern Water Tribe, Aang gives the HOPE speech to the prisoners instead of her, and she gets KO'd by Zuko almost immediately. The Zuko-Katara fight scene that was posted is like the entire fight except for the next attack by Zuko that knocks her out. She does take Zuko out later by surprise; he isn't even aware that she's there.
SUKI: LOL THERE IS NO SUKI
ZUKO: Dev Patel gave a good performance. It wasn't great because the writing sucked, but he was good. Also, uh, Shyamalan, Zuko doesn't have any "friends" to have spoken up to save. Seriously, Zuko doesn't speak up to save soldiers he doesn't know, he speaks up to save "his friends". I guess his act was too selfless in the show.
IROH: Shaun Taub did a good job here. Iroh didn't really do anything all that badass though. He blocked Zhao's attack and showed off his ability to firebend without a source, but didn't kick anyone's ass. UNACCEPTABLE! He wasn't all that jolly. He was probably drinking some tea at one point, but he never made a big deal about it, and he didn't sit around playing Pai Sho ) :
ZHAO: I'm not really sure what was going on here. He actually wasn't as much of a jackass in this movie. Outside of some weird dialogue, he was well acted for the most part. His glory seeking was played down quite a bit, though he did proclaim "Now We Are The Gods" as he stabbed the moon spirit. Also, Iroh tells him that he loses because he stands alone (lol no bro, that's a Azula) rather than because he's rash and reckless. Frankly, neither of those traits are really present in movie Zhao. The most problematic thing of his performance is that he's trying to play a villain initially voiced by Jason Isaacs; that's tough to beat.
OZAI: He's not at all scary. His throne room is bright and inviting, if a little bare, and you see his face all the time, including as he goes for strolls around the Fire Nation with Zhao (MORE ON THAT LATER). Also, he did a really shitty job of completely disfiguring his son's face for life.
INTERRUPTION: IT'S LIKE TRYING TO CATCH SMOKE LIKE TRYING TO CATCH SMOKE WITH YOUR BARE HANDS
PAKKU: IS NOT A GRUMPY OLD MAN I AM NOT HAPPY ABOUT THIS HE IS VERY NICE AND NOT SEXIST AND KICKS WATERBALLS AROUND THIS IS NOT PAKKU FUCK YOU SHYAMALAN I'd also like to point out that by removing the sexism from the water tribe, the movie loses a ton of depth. Now the Water Tribe is just GOOD GUYS WHO ARE AWESOME instead of good guys who have their own societal issues
KOH: Is not here to give you nightmares.
APPA: Is a car with a scary fucking face.
MOMO: Flies around I guess
WORLDBUILDING
On their own, many of the settings looked pretty good, but all the backdrops were so damn drab. They just didn't really stick out. Like, they basically accomplished what they were supposed to, but they weren't all that striking. I didn't want to live in this world, and there was nothing that felt like an amazing (or scary) place to be.
I'm not going to go too far into this because my knowledge of Asian architecture isn't all that amazing, but the whole world feels off, but I can't really explain how.
The Northern Water Tribe is pretty disappointing. It doesn't look to be constructed on a base of whale bones, it's not made of snow and ice, and I didn't notice any animal totems anywhere.
I'm not sure what exactly the design on the Air Temples are. They kind of resemble the round structures of the Cambodian Angkor Wat and Northern Indian temples, but I don't really know.
We don't really see much of the Earth Kingdom, but I'm guessing that "Fire Nation Colony #whateverthefuck" used to be EK, and it had East-Asian architecture; it went by too fast for me to try and figure out what country/dynasty though.
In the Fire Nation capitol, Ozai and Zhao walk by what look to be at least inspired by Greek Ionic or Roman Corinthian columns (they didn't show the capitals, just the base and part of the shaft lol). The Palace looks to be partly Greco-Roman inspired. Ozai has this big sciency thing just sitting in his throne room, which btw IS BRIGHT AND NOT AT ALL SCARY OR MYSTERIOUS. Geez, with how much darker and edgier (aka boring) this movie is, why the fuck is the bad guy's throne room so much brighter? Also, the FN capitol is not in a dormant volcano.
THE SPIRIT WORLD: This was the stupidest damn crap I have ever seen. They just ran the video through a photoshop filter or something. It was definitely the least interesting part of the film.
GENERAL SHIT I AM GETTING LAZY AND TIRED
ZHAO VS ZUKO: This is implied, but the most that comes from it is Zhao mocking Zuko at lunch, and Zhao blowing up Zuko's ship because he SOMEHOW figured out Zuko is the Blue Spirit - this is not at all explained. The fight between them at the end is cut out - Iroh just tells Zuko not to fight him, Zhao attacks Zuko's back (about time), and then Iroh blocks it and blah blah blah Zhao will lose because he has no friends. Some waterbenders drown Zhao in a giant water bubble.
FIREBENDING NEEDS A SOURCE: Firebending does not look dynamic, just sayin'. Plus, this makes everyone look like fucking idiots. lololol those firebenders can't bend without a source, let's fill our city with lanterns when they attack lololol howabout us imprisoned earthbenders just chill out in this prison MADE OF EARTH instead of extinguishing the fire sources and kicking some ass lololol i'll just stand here and let Aang escape my ship even though i'm standing RIGHT NEXT TO A FUCKING FIRE PIT THING!
BORING FIGHT SCENES: None of these fight scenes had any kind of tension. Too much SLOW MOTION and way too much WE'LL JUST TAKE TURNS THIS IS FINAL FANTASY LOLOLOLOL. I did like the long camera shots, but for those to work, your fight scenes have to actually be awesome, which they weren't. Most of the action scenes in this movie were in the trailer and released clips jsyk
BENDING: Bending does not feel at all natural in this movie. They like stand there and flip around and do some martial arts to power up or something idk. I guess they're putting in their fight game combos or something.
PACING: This movie did something amazing. It felt like it moved way too fast, but at the same time felt like it was going no where. Everything was rushed through, except for the stupid shit no one cares about that just went on way too long. No, we don't need to see Aang slowly escape Zuko's ship, or listen to people explaining obvious shit, we need some damn character development or some actually worldbuilding goddamn. Or, I don't know, how about you EXPLAIN WHAT THE AVATAR STATE ACTUALLY IS. I'd imagine anyone who hadn't seen the show in whole would be confused as hell about everything in this movie
BAD CG SPIRIT DRAGON: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? JUST WHAT. WHY IS THIS FUCKING DRAGON HERE? WHY IS HE TALKING TO AANG? THIS IS STUPID AS HELL. Like, Aang first meets the dragon when he's upset about Gyatso's death and goes into the Avatar State (and I cannot believe they completely cut out Roku for some stupid ass dragon. And I guess he replaces Koh or someshit.
MOON SPIRIT: um. well, Zhao still kills it, and the waterbenders lose their bending, but that's over in like 5 seconds once Yue sacrifices herself almost immediately (and doesn't disappear to become the new moon spirit). Aang doesn't merge with the Ocean Spirit to take on the FN navy in the Avatar State either. He just remembers how the Bad CG Spirit Dragon tells him to "show the firenation real waterbending" or something. He then goes up on a wall and does some Tai Chi moves, goes into the Avatar State out of nowhere, and bends a giant wave in front of the NWT. The FN gets scared and leave. . . well except for the FN soldiers that get trapped in the NWT, they bow to Aang at the end.
ZUKO VS THE GAANG: Zuko interacts with Aang at the beginning where he takes Aang Prisoner, then when he saves Aang as the Blue Spirit, and finally where he KOs Katara and takes Aang prisoner at the end and they then fight him. That's it. Katara monologues that Sokka thinks they're being followed, but we never see that. Zuko talks about chasing them, but they never interact. It's the weakest archenemy plot every. Just to mention, Katara takes Zuko by surprise and completely freezes him in ice, Aang wanders around looking all deep and insightful
before unfreezing Zuko's head and telling him that they "could be friends"
So, there's no Suki or Jet, which is going to cause some massive rewrites of the second movie since they're pretty important to the finale. Jet's brainwashing uncovers the Dai Li plot, and Suki's closeness to the Gaang allows for the Dangerous Ladies to enter Ba Sing Se without trouble. I have no idea why they put Imprisoned of all things in this movie (Haru is not named btw) but not Suki or Jet. Also, Aang goes to the Northern Air temple which is deserted except for a traitor who sells him out to the FN (and sets up the Blue Spirit stuff). I don't know why they didn't put Teo or his father in there. Shyamalan wouldn't even have to do the whole episode, just have Aang show up and try to convince Teo's dad to stop building stuff for the FN, Teo'd dad says he has to but looks guilty and confused, Zhao shows up to check on the process of the war balloons and captures Aang, and end that part with Teo's dad looking guilty. It wouldn't take much time and would set up for the war balloons and Teo's dad joining them to build the submarines.
I'd also like to mention that Jet's whole story helps show that the FN isn't the only nation that can do evil, and it helps show how badly the war effects kids.
Actually, the way this was written makes any sequels almost impossible. If they try to do the sequels right, they're going to have go in and actually explain a ton of shit, introduce the necessary characters, and actually put in the important parts of Book 2.
Kanna does namedrop Hama : )
DIALOGUE: IS SHIT. No one talks this way. Everything is awkward, and characters keep repeating themselves in the most stilted manner. Also, the Gaang doesn't have any fun banter. In fact, I'm not really sure why they're friends in this movie except that the plot requires it.
MUSIC: I like the music. It's pretty good. It sucks as an adaptation, but it's easily the most enjoyable part of the movie.
KYOSHI: We see a statue of her (I think her, better be her) and we're told (s)he "lieks games." really? because the first thing I think about Kyoshi is how she MADE HERSELF A FUCKING ISLAND because she was sick of Chin the Conqueror's shit!
And finally, Mr. Shyamalan
SHOW DON'T TELL
Quit telling us everything and actually fucking show us! Katara monologues everything. She tells us about moving north, but we barely see anything interesting. Zuko tells us he talked out of turn to "save his friends." We do see the the "Agni Ki" at least, but it's rushed and doesn't feel at all dramatic (plus little!Azula has a stupid fucking laugh. Also, apparently Ozai feels the need to mock Zuko that he might make Zuko fight Azula in the Agni Ki. He makes it sound like that's pathetic or something. UH HELLO SHE WILL KILL YOU AND THEN FORCE FEED YOUR WARM CORPSE TO YOUR MOTHER). Zhao talks about finding the "Secret Library," but we don't see anything. EDIT: I forgot! If you thought the Sokka/Yue hook-up was fast and the relationship shallow in the show, you've seen nothing. The "Gaang" show up at the NWT as Katara narrates; she tells us that Sokka and Yue "became fast friends" and then they're together. . .walking around town being super boring. No activities being done. Sokka does tell Yue that if she comes to the SWT, his grandma (NOT GRAN GRAN) will ask her "a lot of questions" like "why is your hair white young lady" (SO FUCKING RUDE SOKKA). And that's where Yue TELLS us her backstory.
In Conclusion
It's really obvious that the show's staff really cared about this world. If you pick up the artbook, it's so obvious how much time, effort, and love they put into Avatar. It's also really obvious that this movie was a half-assed money grab, and that Shyamalan didn't really give a shit.
SO I WAS OUT EATING DINNER, JUST CHILLIN' AND ENJOYING SOME GOOD ITALIAN FOOD WHEN IT HIT ME. . .
I DON'T REMEMBER ZUKO ONCE MENTIONING HONOR IN THIS MOVIE.