Without you here there's no use...

[darkprophecies]

WHO: Raven and Rimmer
WHERE: Lake Placid, NY (their house)
WHEN: Sometime after Tony's post
WARNINGS: Language probably ._.
SUMMARY: Raven's pledged her hand in helping any way she can, and her husband-to-be is a scaredy cat that wants to stick his head in the sand. Let's see how this goes.
FORMAT: Para

Comments

[ajrimmer_ssc]

And then there was Arnold. Arnold Judas Rimmer, the man who was so cowardly he'd faint at the sight of blood, who'd hide under the scannerscope table when under attack by GELFs, the man who'd run a mile if there was a fight in a pub. This cowardly little git of a man who was, frankly, about as yellow as a herd of elephants who'd had multiple gallons of diuretic each

[ajrimmer_ssc]

He exhaled as well, as he knew damn well that she had an excellent point. Even though the HIVE was shaping up to be a nastier piece of work than anybody could have foreseen, Trigon would break them all in a heartbeat and eat their livers. And that just about broke him. He'd promised her to stand with her if Trigon ever reared his ugly, demonic head in this dimension, and now he found himself having to justify his words instead of sticking to the topic.

"But that's different. That is our business. That's personal. That's...that's protecting you from being taken over by him. This isn't...this isn't that. It's apples and oranges

[darkprophecies]

"Arnold, I know that. I really, really understand that, because I feel the exact same way about you." she sounded frustrated, to the point of nearly being in tears-type of frustrated. Only when she looked over at him did he get to see that her eyes matched the sound of her voice.

"But if I didn't go in, and I didn't help teleport people out of a burning building, or move a person to safety or to a hospital, then that's the same as saying I'm completely fine with just letting them die. I'm not fine with that. I---"

Watch out, personal revelation on the horizon and approaching fast...

"I have a gift I can use, Arnold. Why would I want to waste it if I can save people with it...?"

[ajrimmer_ssc]

They had known this was going to happen. Back during their first night together, that wild and wonderful and loving night in November, they'd had just this conversation. He'd promised her a life of security and safety and nothing bad ever happening...and she'd stomped that down flat, reminding him what sort of a world they lived in. And her words had been proven right several times. She'd been in a bloody magical coma, for pity's sake. And still he felt like a miserable failure when he couldn't protect her.

The look on her face broke his heart again, and he had to look away. He tried to remember his anger, the fact that she'd done this without discussing it with him first, that this was the exact opposite of what they'd been working for. But he also knew that she hated feeling useless, that being part of her team was important to her, that she liked to help and be involved. And she'd stopped for so long because of him. He couldn't be angry at her for that

[darkprophecies]

"You won't reconsider?" she fired it right back at him, because, in her mind, she was the one in the right here. She had the ability to save people, and he was telling her not to. She understood the reasoning behind it, she got that he was scared out of his mind, but these were living people, innocent of all of this who would get harmed just because she had chickened out.

"If you're so worried about me being hurt, then do something about it, rather than sitting there and arguing with me."

[ajrimmer_ssc]

And that shocked him silly. Still seated like a total gimboid on the floor, he looked up at her incredulously, eyes and mouth wide and round.

"What?! You can't be serious!"

He actually started scooting away from her, still on the floor, crab walking backwards on the balls of his hands and feet, like she suddenly had the plague.

"You cannot be serious! Me? Go with you to...to fight somewhere? Are you mad?"

[darkprophecies]

"If you can't protect me from the HIVE, you can't protect me from my father, Arnold. It's as simple as that." and now she was less on the defensive, and far more on the offensive. She knew she had a point, she knew he'd have a hard time truly arguing this with her.

"You're invulnerable, as you continuously remind me when I have any doubts. If something came close to hurting me, it couldn't, because I'd have you. I'll be going either way, it's up to you how safe you want me to be."

A pause.

"Besides. I thought we were a team."

[ajrimmer_ssc]

"We are! We are a team! I just...saw myself as more of a support role than an active one."

Oh, the mealy-mouthed coward. Saying he'd stick by her and help her and then turning around and saying something like this. But he couldn't help it; it was long ingrained in him to run from confrontations, especially physical ones. He was a coward. All through, a ridiculous, overblown, puffed up twerpy little man with all the backbone of a jellyfish. And she'd just called him on it.

"I mean I-...I would, I will. But...I mean, I can't! I don't know how! What am I supposed to do, put on a domino mask and call myself H-Man?"

[darkprophecies]

The longer he rambled, the more cool her expression became. She'd been like this, once upon a time - fearful of actually going into battle, scared she'd mess something up, and letting others fight the majority of her battles for her. It had taken her years, and a healthy push from certain people to get her on the path she needed to be on.

Time for a push, Arnold.

"No. You'd be at my side like you always are."

[ajrimmer_ssc]

That cool expression caused him a strange, ambivalent reaction of his own. On the one hand, he felt like he was the lowest worm ever to crawl on the face of the planet, and loathed himself for it. On the other hand...he wanted to prove to her he could do it. He wanted her not to look down on him like that. He wanted her to be proud of him.

He was silent for a long, long moment. A lifetime of cowardice wasn't overcome in one conversation, after all. Not even after six months of a relationship and an impending wedding. Not even after discovering what real values were, and why they needed defending. He was, at heart, still that frightened little boy who was waiting for father to slap him on that stretching rack at the end of the day.

"I..."

Yes or no, Arn? Tick tock.

But as he tried to come to a decision, his throat closed up, and he began having trouble breathing. Oh, great, he was hyperventilating, which was tricky for a hologram to accomplish and yet he managed anyway.

[darkprophecies]

In some part of her mind, she knew that, and it soon won over that desperate urge to prove things to him. At the end of the day, he wouldn't be hurt... he'd be loved completely and utterly by a woman who thought he could hang the moon if he ever decided to try. That woman was coming out at the moment, and now coming back over to him to pull him over into her arms.

"Arnold... you can do this."

She'd never been more sure of something, really, but she wasn't going to say that just yet - rather hold him and try to stem some of this fear.

"It isn't as if you're doing this alone."

[ajrimmer_ssc]

With panting, shallow breaths, he leaned into her, eyes staring sightlessly at the wall over her shoulder. Hands still hung useless at his sides, and he felt like he was being trapped. All the cold wedding feet he'd been feeling came back in a rush. This was a mistake. They shouldn't be doing this. He wasn't good enough for her. She deserved somebody who wasn't an abject coward.

Jerking his entire body away from her, he scrambled clumsily to his feet and began to run. Run through the basement, up the stairs, large feet flopping against the steps...and out the back door. It was almost instinctive. His brain went on holiday and the 'flight' impulse just moved him.

He was halfway around the lake in five minutes flat.

[darkprophecies]

"... By Azar, please don't let our children turn out this way." she breathed up at the ceiling. In his flight impulse, she was sure he had forgotten that she could teleport to wherever he was instantly. Actually, with him running, she could just fly there and keep up with him... but she let him run. One minute, two minutes, three minutes...

Seven minutes before she got thoroughly bored and agitated, and bothered to teleport to where she knew his emotions to be at. Actually, just a yard or two ahead, in case he had to slam on the breaks mid-run.

[ajrimmer_ssc]

Which was exactly what he had to do. Although by that point it was less of a panicked run and more of a 'oh what the smeg did I just do?' jog. As it was, in the dim light of the evening, he barely spotted the tell-tale signs of her teleportation in time, and nearly plowed into her headlong.

He skidded backwards for a second, a little startled gasp escaping him, before he just crumbled like a coffee cake. The collapse of his face was almost comical in a way, and he winced.

"S-Sorry," he gasped. "Don't know what came over me."

[darkprophecies]

"Fear." the word was said in a very matter-of-fact way, like she was answering a math problem or something.

This time she didn't bother getting close, because, heh, last time he bolted! She'd try a third route, and let him have breathing room while obviously trying to be loving and considerate, especially in how she purposely softened her tone.

"... it's a lot to ask of you, I know. I'm possibly even way out of line in asking..."

[ajrimmer_ssc]

It was already chilly out here, even after a panicked run. Well, chilly for him, at any rate. He was shivering a bit, and his breath was showing in the air. Sort of. It got about two inches away from his body and then vanished entirely.

"No," he said automatically, and then realised he meant it. "No, you're not out of line. I am."

He stood there, arms wrapped around his stomach, ashamed of himself and unable to really look at her. There it was. The big test, and he'd botched it. She must hate him now. He was such a smeghead.

"I'm the one who's out of line. I'm just...I don't know. I'm so afraid of...of failing you..."