CATEGORY/PAIRING:
Daniel/Vala,
Sam/Teal'c,
Sam/Teal'c/Mitchell,
Sam/Vala,
Daniel/Teal'c/Mitchell,
Sam/Mitchell/Vala
RATING: PG-13 (raunchy but not explicit)
STATUS: complete
SEASON/SPOILERS: 10x08 "Memento Mori"
ARCHIVE: permission granted; drop me a URL after you archive so I can link to it from my blog
GENRE: Missing Scene/Epilogue/Episode Tag "Memento Mori"
WARNING: group sex
SERIES: not really, but there's a
Gen version with picspam called "X Is for X-Files"WORD COUNT: 577
DISCLAIMER: I hereby bequeath all profits derived from this fanfic to the charity of MGM's choice.
SUMMARY/SYNOPSIS/PREMISE: "Memento Mori" tag: how SG-1 celebrates Vala's official membership.
- - -
"Perhaps a celebration is in order," suggested Teal'c.
"That's a great idea," agreed Colonel Mitchell. "We can check out that new rib joint near my place."
So SG-1 plus General Landry left soon thereafter to dine at a barbecue restaurant.
"I watched an X-Files episode where the meat served in a place much like this came from... butchered people," said Vala.
Mitchell laughed. "Sorry to disappoint. Looks like the prices on the menu are too low to be anything except butchered swine and bovines."
"I find bee bee cue to be a most savory method for preparing the flesh of freshly slaughtered animals." Teal'c tucked a bib into his shirt.
Landry nodded. "Or a creel of fish." He slurped the cascading head of a tall, dark Guinness.
"You ordered chicken?" Carter asked Jackson.
"Uh, yeah," Jackson replied wryly. "A toast to the newest member of SG-1."
"Here, here!" they chorused, raising various glasses toward Vala. She blushed and clinked her microbrew against theirs.
They feasted, leaving piles of bones, cobs, paper napkins, antiseptic-scented towelettes, and paper money on the table. Landry congratulated Vala again before excusing himself from the post-meal festivities of drinking more beer in front Mitchell's high-definition flat screen.
Vala chose a movie about a con job and jewel heist, to no one's surprise. Then they watched sports highlights and "The Blues Brothers", which prompted a game involving drinking every time someone said "band". Carter taught Vala some dance moves. During Aretha Franklin's number, Vala spilled beer on Jackson, who pretended to be pissed off. After more sports highlights, Hank Williams Junior, pornographic hip hop, lap dances, and shots of Patron, Mitchell notified the mountain that Vala would be returning the next day -- which by that time, it technically was.
Sometime during the night, Cam awoke from his recliner to discover Daniel and Vala making out on the couch. Daniel wasn't wearing the pants that Vala had spilled beer on, and Vala wasn't wearing a top.
Cam snuck into the bathroom, and when he had finished and went into his room to crash on the bed, he interrupted Teal'c giving Sam a clothing-optional back rub. At least, that's what it looked like. Sam invited him to join in, so he did.
The next time Cam awoke, he was in bed wrapped around Daniel; Teal'c was wrapped around him. They were not wearing clothes. Sam and Vala were moaning in the living room.
Sometime during the late morning, someone -- most likely Daniel -- had made a lot of coffee, and the aroma filled the house. Cam was sandwiched on the bed between Sam and Vala, but this time, he was wearing a bra. Teal'c was sitting on the floor, surrounded by candles Cam had not seen since the holidays.
Cam carefully untangled himself from the ladies, pulled on someone's boxer shorts, and stumbled into the kitchen. Along the way, he noticed that the living room looked tidy and in perfect order.
Daniel sat at the table fully dressed, reading the newspaper, drinking from Cam's favorite mug. "Morning, Colonel."
"Dr. Jackson."
"Nice bra."
Cam took off the bra. "I'm gonna have some coffee."
"You have good taste -- it's a gourmet blend."
"Yeah."
"I can drive Vala home-- er, back."
"Knock yourselves out."
Cam drank his coffee on the back porch and inhaled the crisp Colorado air. "It's good to get the band back together," he said to the wide, blue sky.
[end]