(no subject)
... we don't have an open batch? WHAT IS THIS.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed~
Character: Ryomou Shimei
Series: Ikki Tousen (Battle Vixens)
Character Age: 18ish
Canon: In Ikki Tousen, the hot and usually scantily-clad reincarnations of ancient Chinese warriors fight for total domination of... Tokyo. Each fighter ("Toushi") possesses a magatama stone which reveals their rank to the outside world; this stone contains the spirit and memories of said dead Chinese guys. For the most part, the toushi just want to fight their fates and one another as fast and as hard as they can.
Enter Ryomou Shimei with her MPD in tow. Usually calm, cool, and easily embarrassed by her prudish tendencies, she is hardly the socializing sort or even much to comment on, aside from her ever-present eye patch. It is in battle, however, that Ryomou becomes a raging dominatrix who enjoys beating and strangling her opponents to the brink of death, because this is her major turn on. Loyal to a fault and well-prepared to do stupid things to avoid cowardice, there isn't a lot that the reincarnate of Wu's general, Lord Lü Meng, will not do for the sake of defying her fate.
Sample app:
Hey, you. Yeah. All of you.
To start off, let's get one thing straight: Anyone else who asks for my booty isn't getting off as easy as the last guy. He might even walk again. So no, I won't say it again. I've got better things to do than be insulted by some wannabe buccaneer. The best thing to do would be wise up, but I know better than to expect that. Doing stupid things is much easier. It comes naturally to most people.
As long as I'm talking about stupid choices, may as well throw out the invitation I got for this place. "Come on, Toushi, come on -- you're sooo good." If you hadn't kept going, it would have been fine! Whether or not I give good head does not -- that has absolutely no relevance with my fighting abilities! Whatsoever. Understand?
So, it looks like I'll be here awhile. Good. There's plenty of time to take down whoever is responsible for this shoddy location. As you may have guessed, I don't find men in costumes all that terrifying. The smell is worse than the make-up job, and that really oughta say it all. Full points for the glow-in-the dark lake, but what sort of cowards need a giant night-light?
I should have taken my chances in the woods. At least none of the fools there had the balls to tell me all about how their lives got twist-turned upside down. Don't think I'll care no matter who tries to sell it to me; living with your aunt and uncle shouldn't be that hard to get used to.
Unless you're an idiot. The way things are going, I honestly wouldn't be surprised.
I suppose that leaves us two options, doesn't it? The first is you stop dicking around and let me leave this godforsaken swamp. You probably won't get hurt. Well, much.
The second option is I get out anyway after snapping the neck of whoever decided the guys in the monkey suits were allowed to cop a feel. I'll go through the whole herd. Could be fun, you never know. So long as someone profits, either works. It's a guaranteed win/win. Guess I could do it all.
Yeah. I think I'll select option three.
Poll Vote!
Character: Stylish Alastor/ Blade Master: Alastor/ Midnight Thunder Boy. Profile picture.
Series: Viewtiful Joe~
Character Age: Henshin Form; Ancient. Human Age; 19. (roughly)
Canon: Alastor is a sword master who effortlessly wields a large weapon that dstinctly resembles Dante's Alastor Blade. He has several "superhero names" in the Viewtiful Joe series, but prefers to call himself the "Midnight Thunder Boy". He is rather short (probably five foot or less) and wears all black and purple clothing/armour. (He also has a human form with black hair and white clothing.) Alastor has mimcry abilities, perfectly assimilating Joe's moves as his own and wielding them against his rival. Alastor's Henshin form (his "Devil Trigger") is lightning elemental. In addition to his own moves, Alastor's V-Watch gives him the standard V-skills; speeding and slowing time, "Zoom In", explosive poses that damage his opponents and more.
For the most part, Alastor is in constant search for combat and conflict. His dream is to be the strongest character in all cinematic history. He is a fierce rival of Viewtiful Joe, whom he has fought repeatedly throughout the series. Alastor is romantically linked to Goldie, the twin sister of Joe's girlfriend Silvia.
Sample Post:
So this is where Joe came to hide from me, huh? Kindova lame title for a movie though... I mean, c'mon. "Camp Fuck You Die"? Sounds like a b-flick if I ever heard one. Tch, complete with ketchup blood oozing zombies. JADOW had waaay more interesting lackeys than this. Not that I had any problem with carving up a few no name extras in a movie with a budget THIS low. I didn't get a red carpet, or anything! And obviously no one hired a trainer. The actors for this movie don't even know any good fighting poses! Psh, they clearly aren't on my level...
I saw the Six Machine on my way to this boring lookin' cabin set. So Viewtiful Joe has to be here. He's probably scared... heheheh. Can't blame him, though. After all, I am Stylish Alastor. No one can defeat the Midnight Thunder Boy!. He just got a couple lucky shots...
So where are the lights?
Where are the cameras?
And who the heck are you people?
Are you in Wardrobe? Cuz uh, I could use a pointout to the nearest sauna. Bein' the best is supposed to have perks, ain't it?
If you guys are just techies, then just tell me where Joe's dressing room is. He's got a date with the sharp edge of my vengeance. He may have won before, but he caught me on an off day. No one has more Viewtiful moves than Blade Master Alastor! None, I'm sayin'!
Come out Joe! The credits are about to roll on your career. Alastor is gonna rock...
Devil Trigger, baby!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Kurai
Series: Angel Sanctuary - [ Wikipedia ]
Age: Several centuries, if not millenia, though canonically stated as looking "like a human between ten and thirteen". - [ The manga panel ]
Canon: Angel Sanctuary is a story about a boy who is in love with his sister and the reincarnation of a powerful angel. Said angel, in her own lifetime, mentored a little demon girl for a while. This was Kurai, the princess and Dragon Master of the race of Evils. They are a race of demons living on the uppermost level of hell.
Before being taken in by the angel Alexiel, she was first sent into exile by her father for being a little rascal, and when she came back, disovered her whole family and most of her people murdered by angels, who had started a war against them. Her own life was saved by Alexiel. Kurai proceeded to develop a serious case of hero worship. So much that eons later, she went to Assiah (Earth) to look for her reincarnated soul. What she found was one troubled and very obviously MALE teenager. She was not a happy camper at first, but then proceeded to fall in love with the guy.
She's a bit of a tomboy, often wearing modern boy's clothes even at her home. She's always wanted to be a strong fighter, striving after the ideal of Alexiel, the so-called "warrior goddess" - unfortunately, she's also very emotional, cries easily, and has to get rescued every once in a while. Despite her age, she not only looks, but also acts like a preteen. This leads to her sometimes being only a little selfish, like leaving her country behind while giving herself up only for her crush's sake. She also likes to yell at people.
Also, she is taken from around the end of volume 11, when Setsuna goes off to Heaven for Sara-rescue-stuff.
Sample Entry:
Okay, let me tell you just one thing. I'm not interested in your camp, fuck you right back and die, you may as well too.
Well, now, that that's out of the way, I have... an announcement to make. Ahhem. So, here goes!
SETSUNA, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!
What were you THINKING, vanishing on us like that?! You were supposed to go to HEAVEN, not Assiah! What about Sara, huh? You're all about her, usually! Furthermore, because you decided to take a holiday, I had to come all the way up here and look for you, and don't you think that was in any way easy!
Been to Tokyo first, of course. There, I nearly got caught by those two stupid police officers that were after you - something about bad conduct and being a witness in a murder case. They mean that mean-looking idiot friend of Sakuya's, Katou? But WAIT, THAT DOENSN'T MATTER. Then I've been to London now I finally know where that is, where someone saw me with my wings out and I nearly got exorcised! Then, I've been to, uh... Paris, where they wanted to employ me as a "model" - whatever that is. They were all cooing like succubi about my skin tone and hair color - as if they were that strange! And THEN, lastly, I've been to -- errrm waitasec. New Dork? York? -- where some thugs wanted to gang-rape me! I roasted them instead - let me tell you, humans taste horrible when they haven't washed in more than a week! ... what?! I was damn HUNGRY and they sure deserved it! Tch!
At least now I definitely know again why I don't like humans, though this place here? Is really the best of them. Within an hour of arriving here, I got 1) an attack by zombies (undeads in Assiah? What are they DOING in Hades? ... I bet that was because you destroyed the crucible. Nice work, really, nice work.); 2) an involuntary piggy-back ride by a gorilla; 3) bitten by a killer bunny; 4) ... one word: tentacles; 5) played ping-pong with by a nondescript entity and that stupid barrier.
I guess I'll have to give them points for creativity. However, what's this "youth delinquent camp" crap, and why does everything seem to agree that I belong here? I'm not a delinquent, I'm a demon! From a human's view, being evil is kind of my job, I guess.
Though I bet this is some kind of dimension-warp, because, duh SOMETHING is fishy here, I can just smell it! After all I've seen up to now, I wouldn't be terribly surprised if this were some conspiracy for the abduction of youths to brainwash them into something like the director's own revenge squad, though not for the murder, but because the murderer didn't bother to deliver the corpse to her, so she could use it for a damnation spell on the victim, so as to avenge her maiden's heart, which got brutally broken because the victim wasn't a "good boy". And afterwards, she'll have those freshly cleaned brains for dessert! What a bitch. Though if that really turns out to be the plan, she better be prepared for repercussions, cause I WILL bite back! I might also want to hit my head to some flat surface for the sheer idiocy.
...
So, I think my conclusion for now is that I don't like the sense of humor whoever is running this place seems to have. But, anyway, it's not like I'm here to stay.
Oh, and Setsuna? Don't you even THINK about hiding!
Poll Vote!
Character: Katara
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Character Age: 14
Canon: Take four nations each with the power of one of the four elements. Add one war. Place one mystic peace keeper of the entire world known as the Avatar into an iceberg, and set aside for one hundred years. Release the Avatar, add one colorful band of allies trying to help him save the world, one Fire Nation trying to stop them. Mix well. Add some cabbages for seasoning and you have Avatar: The Last Airbender.
One of Aang's aforementioned colorful allies is Katara who, during an argument with her brother Sokka, accidentally frees the Avatar. Most of the time, she is mature, logical and kind-hearted, with a maternal streak a mile wide and an unflinching loyalty to her friends and convictions. However, Katara also has a quick temper, severe difficulty accepting a viewpoint other than her own, and the inability to keep her opinions to herself no matter what the situation. When she's not kicking Fire Nation butt and trying to keep her friends in line, Katara somehow finds the time for such pursuits as getting topped by dashing young freedom fighters. Over the course of the series, she becomes a master waterbender and in turn teaches the art to Aang.
Sample Post:
From his trusty treebranch, the young gorilla's heart was stirred by the sight of a beautiful maiden intrepidly exploring the treacherous territory below! The amorous ape was overcome with desire, not to mention the frustration that comes with being unable to get...a date! Grasping a handy vine, he swooped down to gather the pure and innocent damsel in his arms! The maiden melted into the embrace of the manly monkey of her dreams and--just what is all this?! I could write better than this in grade school! N-Not that I did, but that's beside the point! Anyway, what you're writing is completely untrue! Except for the part where I get called an intrepid, beautiful maiden. I like that part. But that sexist attitude has got to go! Girls can swing out of trees and pick up boys, too!
And you! Have you ever considered that the reason you can't get a date is because no girl in her right mind wants to go out with a guy who jumps out of trees and tries to pick them up without asking first?! A girl likes getting swept off her feet, I'll admit, but there's a line between what's romantic and what's creepy and you just crossed it!
...Stop making that face. Look, just because you don't know how to make a good impression doesn't mean you can't learn! I'll tell you what. How about I bend you a bath and give you some pointers on what you should do to get a girl then you find some nice ape-woman and let me get back to finding a way out of here, okay? Okay!
Personal hygiene is a must when you're trying to get a girl or anyone, really, to like you. I know this swamp water didn't make the most luxurious bath in the world, but it's better than nothing! Smelling like dead elbow-leech is an improvement over smelling like dead hog-monkey, I hope. The way to a girl's heart is not through having palms of sandpaper, and what have you been using to file your nails, anyway? On second thought, I don't want to know. It's not a hopeless case, though! I've got a great seaweed moisturizer that'll work wonders on your hands and this rock here will make a good nail file. Remember, you want to show her you're strong, but that you've got a sensitive side, too.
Add a few of these flowers--bright pink goes with everything, doesn't it?--And we're done! You actually look presentable, now go out there and find yourself an amorous ape of your very own!
Well, that wasn't so bad. I got the monkey off my back and now I can concentrate on what's important. Alright Katara, focus. Ignore the rabbit that's waving a paper around at you. Ignore the screams in the distance. Screams in the distance? Okay, okay, I'll read it! "Marcy felt as if she had been struck by Cupid's Arrow! Languidly stretching her tentacles above the waves, she wrapped them around her handsome prey. She would not rest until she had been artificially in-simian-ated by this gallant young gorilla!"
I can't let that happen! No one's getting in-simian-ated if I have anything to say about it!
Poll Vote!
Character: Matsunaga Sara
Series: Ever17 ~Out of Infinity~
Character Age: 16
Canon: Ever17 is the story of six (or is it seven? Or five?) young people who are trapped in an underwater theme park and have 119 hours to find a way to escape before the place implodes and they all drown. It's a little like The Poseidon Adventure, if The Poseidon Adventure were set in the future and had sinister pharmaceutical companies and time paradoxes and some interesting uses of mythology and quantum physics. So not much like it at all, really.
Matsunaga Sara is one of the aforementioned young people. She appears on the surface to be a more-or-less normal schoolgirl who's cheerful, friendly enough (if a bit on the quiet side sometimes), and fairly calm in emergencies. She also has something of an active imagination and likes to pretend to be a ninja (nin nin!). As it turns out, she's also a brilliant hacker, possibly the best in the world, despite her young age -- apparently she once won a worldwide hacking contest by cracking a difficult encryption in a very short time.
Sample Post:
All right, so I'm lost in a swamp. That's not good, of course. But freaking out about it isn't going to help, right? Anyway, it could be worse. For one thing, I've got this laptop which came flying out of nowhere and nearly hit me in the head. It's a pretty ancient model, but it seems to work well enough. Maybe it's got some kind of information about this place stored on it. Let me see, now...
"Welcome to Camp Fuck You Die, the happiest place on Earth"? Geez, what a weird name. Anyway, it looks like I need to log in... but the encryption's really simple, it should be child's play to crack it. Like a ninja in the night, swiftly and with stealth technology 100%, I shall sneak past the security and into the database! Nin nin!
Aha, there we go! I'm in! ... Wait a second, did the server just crash? I wasn't even trying... And why does it say "Database Error: The server is robust" when it's clearly not robust at all? I mean, if that was all it took to crash it, that's pretty pathetic. It ought to take some actual effort to bring it down like that, otherwise it's not much good, is it? I mean, what's the use of something like this if the server goes down every five minutes? That could get really frustrating, I would think.
Oh well, I guess there's nothing for it but to try again. Here I go, then, off on my mission to unlock the mysterious mysteries of this database (if indeed that's what it is)! ... Oh, what now? "Error: Please confirm you are a ninja by typing "..." below?" What kind of screening is that? I guess it couldn't hurt to do what it says, though. I mean, obviously I'm not going to get any further if I don't.
-- And I get a blank white screen?! Oh, I've had enough of this! Prepare yourself, you evil thing, for now I shall show you the true power of the Matsunaga School of Technological Ninjutsu! ... Just as soon as I can get this page to load, anyway.
Poll Vote!
Character: Coo Erhard
Series: DiGi Charat
Character Age: 13
Canon: DiGi Charat is a manga that involves lolis, cat girls, aliens, and pure crack. The plot is rather simple; Dejiko is the ten-year-old cat girl princess from the planet DiGi Charat who goes to earth to train to be a princess. Piyoko is the eight-year-old panda girl princess of Planet Analogue who has come to Earth to kidnap Dejiko and hold her for ransom. Along with her, she takes the evil Black Gema Gang which she leads, who are more silly than anything. A subsection in this gang called the “PKO” consists of three dog boy doctors who wait on her hand and foot. Crack ensues.
One of these boys is Coo Erhard, youngest member of the PKO and Piyoko’s childhood friend. Coo is generally the least serious of the three despite being a doctor, often joking around or distracted by food. Actually, Coo can be distracted by nearly anything, jumping around from subject to subject and conclusion to conclusion. He can also be outspoken, rude, energetic, occasionally cruel or nasty, and always very informal; speaking in slang and poor grammar. He may also tease Piyoko, but he would give his life for her if the situation ever came to it; proving that he can be serious when he needs to be. Though, that’s almost never. Come on, it’s DiGi Charat.
Sample Post:
So, let’s say you were hungry, right? Y’know, th’ kind of hungry where you’d do just ‘bout anything for food? …What’re you shaking your head for? You’re a zombie, you got to’ve gotten hungry at some point. Have some zombie pride, man.
Back to the story; ‘n listen good, I’ve got a pop quiz after. Okay, so you were so hungry, in fact, that you let your guard down, ‘n got yourself kidnapped by zombies from hell America Lousiana of all places, ‘n you’re in said place now. What would you do?
Hey hey, I saw that ‘spicious look in your eye! Yeah, th’ one that just fell outta your head. Don’t think I didn’t see that! So I know what you’re thinking, ‘n the answer is no, that didn’t happen to me. Really. Completely ignoring th’ fact that I came willingly. Look, you can’t deny an all-you-can-eat buffet, can you? Of course you can’t. Like I said, you’re a zombie, dude, and you like brains ‘n stuff. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here in Lousiana; and a camp either. Just lookit all the fresh meat! That isn’t me, I mean.
But ‘m off-topic, ‘n like all pop quizzers-something-or-other, I gotta get an answer. Like, an actual one cuz you guys seem to be th’ only ones who will. The gorillas’re way bigger than me and the campers are psycho, so no thanks. Most of ‘em aren’t that smart though, so no big difference from you zombies. So, c’mon. Answer already. Oh, and no life lines cuz you lost that option when ya died. Viva la afterlife or something.
….Eh? What? Oh, nope. Groaning erotically isn’t an answer. Actually, that was really really gross. Just for that, you’re going into th’ lake like th’ rest of th’ failed contestants. Haha; Bamf! Sucks to be you. But man, that’s like, the twentieth zombie today, ‘n it stopped being funny the first time ‘round. But eh, what can ya do? Though it was kinda a shame no one got th’ answer; it was so easy, too.
What d’ya do if you’re stuck in a bad horror camp in hell and or Lousiana? Why, nothing, a’course.
‘n by “nothing”, I mean “raid the mess hall”. Buh-bye! Guess who’s gonna eat like Th’ King tonight~
Poll Vote!
Character: Kakimoto Chikusa
Series: Katekyoy Hitman Reborn!
Character Age: second year of Jr. High
Canon: Sawada Tsunayoshi is no normal Junior High school kid. He's weak, cowardly, and isn't particularly good at anything. It wasn't as though he was happy with it, but he wasn't unhappy with it either. It was just a fact of life he had to deal with. Enter Reborn, the home tutor his mom hires for him. Reborn is no ordinary tutor, no, he was a top hitman (despite only being an infant) and he was here to teach Tsuna how to be a mafia boss. The 10th Boss of the Vongola famiy, to be exact. Unsurprisingly, Tsuna wasn't exactly jumping for joy when he heard, but due to circumstances that spun out of his control, he gathered his family about him ("They're just my friends!") as mafia bosses tend to do. However, he's also become a target because of his new position as the Tenth.
The Kokuyou Junior High Gang is one such group that targets Tsuna. Led by the couch rapist with a spinny eye, Rokudo Mukuro, the Gang attacks the strongest people at Tsuna's school in an effort to flush him out. It works. Mukuro's left and right hand men are Joushima Ken and Kakimoto Chikusa, both of whom are loyal to a fault. Of the two, Chikusa is the calmer. He's smart, knowledgeable, and rarely, if ever, loses his temper. He sees most things as 'troublesome' and prefers not to do more than necessary if possible. He's a very talented fighter and doesn't hesitate to hurt or kill, having a silent but strong desire to fight.
Sample Post:
'Camp Fuck You Die' is it? It doesn't look so scary to me, certainly not deserving of a name meant to frighten visitors. 'Fuck You, Die' indeed. It's just miles of swampland, no threats, no dangers, no reason why anyone should--Hn. That's something I haven't seen before.
A zombie from an old-fashioned horror movie? How amateur. Anyone with a basic knowledge of the human body knows a rotting body cannot walk. It's physically impossible, as muscles need to contract in order for movement, arteries and veins need to carry oxygen to and from the muscles in order to cause the aforementioned contraction, and a heart is necessary to pump the blood around the body. It is missing significant sections of its limbs and have a hollow chest cavity, yet is still managing motor functions without having the ligaments and tendons necessary to move bones and muscle.
Six of the eight bones that form its neurocranium are missing, exposing the contents, and if the little animals I can see crawling about inside the cranial vault are any indication, they have been gone for a long time. The brain should become incapable of function a long while ago, especially as it appears there are mealworms feeding off its gray matter. Seeing as it is apparently aware of its surroundings, capable of controlling limbs, awkward as its movements are, and vibrating vocal cords to create those senseless sounds, I have come to one conclusion. It clearly does not exist. An elaborate illusion, no doubt, created and designed to scare simplistic little children who know no better. Pathetic.
Hmm? An attempt to attack me will not elicit any type of fear in me. I'm not one to scream and run away--!!! Tch. Not an illusion, then? Or at least one that is quite powerful. How troublesome. I'm not interested in wasting my time and energy fighting something that shouldn't exist. Are you still going to try to fight me? I won't hold back, you know. Even if you've found a way to move despite the laws of physics, I promise you won't be able to do anything if your body parts are scattered over the ground. I'll break you to bits.
Come on, then. I want to finish this quickly. It's hot and I do not like to sweat.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed~
Character: Ryomou Shimei
Series: Ikki Tousen (Battle Vixens)
Character Age: 18ish
Canon: In Ikki Tousen, the hot and usually scantily-clad reincarnations of ancient Chinese warriors fight for total domination of... Tokyo. Each fighter ("Toushi") possesses a magatama stone which reveals their rank to the outside world; this stone contains the spirit and memories of said dead Chinese guys. For the most part, the toushi just want to fight their fates and one another as fast and as hard as they can.
Enter Ryomou Shimei with her MPD in tow. Usually calm, cool, and easily embarrassed by her prudish tendencies, she is hardly the socializing sort or even much to comment on, aside from her ever-present eye patch. It is in battle, however, that Ryomou becomes a raging dominatrix who enjoys beating and strangling her opponents to the brink of death, because this is her major turn on. Loyal to a fault and well-prepared to do stupid things to avoid cowardice, there isn't a lot that the reincarnate of Wu's general, Lord Lü Meng, will not do for the sake of defying her fate.
Sample app:
Hey, you. Yeah. All of you.
To start off, let's get one thing straight: Anyone else who asks for my booty isn't getting off as easy as the last guy. He might even walk again. So no, I won't say it again. I've got better things to do than be insulted by some wannabe buccaneer. The best thing to do would be wise up, but I know better than to expect that. Doing stupid things is much easier. It comes naturally to most people.
As long as I'm talking about stupid choices, may as well throw out the invitation I got for this place. "Come on, Toushi, come on -- you're sooo good." If you hadn't kept going, it would have been fine! Whether or not I give good head does not -- that has absolutely no relevance with my fighting abilities! Whatsoever. Understand?
So, it looks like I'll be here awhile. Good. There's plenty of time to take down whoever is responsible for this shoddy location. As you may have guessed, I don't find men in costumes all that terrifying. The smell is worse than the make-up job, and that really oughta say it all. Full points for the glow-in-the dark lake, but what sort of cowards need a giant night-light?
I should have taken my chances in the woods. At least none of the fools there had the balls to tell me all about how their lives got twist-turned upside down. Don't think I'll care no matter who tries to sell it to me; living with your aunt and uncle shouldn't be that hard to get used to.
Unless you're an idiot. The way things are going, I honestly wouldn't be surprised.
I suppose that leaves us two options, doesn't it? The first is you stop dicking around and let me leave this godforsaken swamp. You probably won't get hurt. Well, much.
The second option is I get out anyway after snapping the neck of whoever decided the guys in the monkey suits were allowed to cop a feel. I'll go through the whole herd. Could be fun, you never know. So long as someone profits, either works. It's a guaranteed win/win. Guess I could do it all.
Yeah. I think I'll select option three.
Poll Vote!
Character: Stylish Alastor/ Blade Master: Alastor/ Midnight Thunder Boy. Profile picture.
Series: Viewtiful Joe~
Character Age: Henshin Form; Ancient. Human Age; 19. (roughly)
Canon: Alastor is a sword master who effortlessly wields a large weapon that dstinctly resembles Dante's Alastor Blade. He has several "superhero names" in the Viewtiful Joe series, but prefers to call himself the "Midnight Thunder Boy". He is rather short (probably five foot or less) and wears all black and purple clothing/armour. (He also has a human form with black hair and white clothing.) Alastor has mimcry abilities, perfectly assimilating Joe's moves as his own and wielding them against his rival. Alastor's Henshin form (his "Devil Trigger") is lightning elemental. In addition to his own moves, Alastor's V-Watch gives him the standard V-skills; speeding and slowing time, "Zoom In", explosive poses that damage his opponents and more.
For the most part, Alastor is in constant search for combat and conflict. His dream is to be the strongest character in all cinematic history. He is a fierce rival of Viewtiful Joe, whom he has fought repeatedly throughout the series. Alastor is romantically linked to Goldie, the twin sister of Joe's girlfriend Silvia.
Sample Post:
So this is where Joe came to hide from me, huh? Kindova lame title for a movie though... I mean, c'mon. "Camp Fuck You Die"? Sounds like a b-flick if I ever heard one. Tch, complete with ketchup blood oozing zombies. JADOW had waaay more interesting lackeys than this. Not that I had any problem with carving up a few no name extras in a movie with a budget THIS low. I didn't get a red carpet, or anything! And obviously no one hired a trainer. The actors for this movie don't even know any good fighting poses! Psh, they clearly aren't on my level...
I saw the Six Machine on my way to this boring lookin' cabin set. So Viewtiful Joe has to be here. He's probably scared... heheheh. Can't blame him, though. After all, I am Stylish Alastor. No one can defeat the Midnight Thunder Boy!. He just got a couple lucky shots...
So where are the lights?
Where are the cameras?
And who the heck are you people?
Are you in Wardrobe? Cuz uh, I could use a pointout to the nearest sauna. Bein' the best is supposed to have perks, ain't it?
If you guys are just techies, then just tell me where Joe's dressing room is. He's got a date with the sharp edge of my vengeance. He may have won before, but he caught me on an off day. No one has more Viewtiful moves than Blade Master Alastor! None, I'm sayin'!
Come out Joe! The credits are about to roll on your career. Alastor is gonna rock...
Devil Trigger, baby!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Kurai
Series: Angel Sanctuary - [ Wikipedia ]
Age: Several centuries, if not millenia, though canonically stated as looking "like a human between ten and thirteen". - [ The manga panel ]
Canon: Angel Sanctuary is a story about a boy who is in love with his sister and the reincarnation of a powerful angel. Said angel, in her own lifetime, mentored a little demon girl for a while. This was Kurai, the princess and Dragon Master of the race of Evils. They are a race of demons living on the uppermost level of hell.
Before being taken in by the angel Alexiel, she was first sent into exile by her father for being a little rascal, and when she came back, disovered her whole family and most of her people murdered by angels, who had started a war against them. Her own life was saved by Alexiel. Kurai proceeded to develop a serious case of hero worship. So much that eons later, she went to Assiah (Earth) to look for her reincarnated soul. What she found was one troubled and very obviously MALE teenager. She was not a happy camper at first, but then proceeded to fall in love with the guy.
She's a bit of a tomboy, often wearing modern boy's clothes even at her home. She's always wanted to be a strong fighter, striving after the ideal of Alexiel, the so-called "warrior goddess" - unfortunately, she's also very emotional, cries easily, and has to get rescued every once in a while. Despite her age, she not only looks, but also acts like a preteen. This leads to her sometimes being only a little selfish, like leaving her country behind while giving herself up only for her crush's sake. She also likes to yell at people.
Also, she is taken from around the end of volume 11, when Setsuna goes off to Heaven for Sara-rescue-stuff.
Sample Entry:
Okay, let me tell you just one thing. I'm not interested in your camp, fuck you right back and die, you may as well too.
Well, now, that that's out of the way, I have... an announcement to make. Ahhem. So, here goes!
SETSUNA, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!
What were you THINKING, vanishing on us like that?! You were supposed to go to HEAVEN, not Assiah! What about Sara, huh? You're all about her, usually! Furthermore, because you decided to take a holiday, I had to come all the way up here and look for you, and don't you think that was in any way easy!
Been to Tokyo first, of course. There, I nearly got caught by those two stupid police officers that were after you - something about bad conduct and being a witness in a murder case. They mean that mean-looking idiot friend of Sakuya's, Katou? But WAIT, THAT DOENSN'T MATTER. Then I've been to London now I finally know where that is, where someone saw me with my wings out and I nearly got exorcised! Then, I've been to, uh... Paris, where they wanted to employ me as a "model" - whatever that is. They were all cooing like succubi about my skin tone and hair color - as if they were that strange! And THEN, lastly, I've been to -- errrm waitasec. New Dork? York? -- where some thugs wanted to gang-rape me! I roasted them instead - let me tell you, humans taste horrible when they haven't washed in more than a week! ... what?! I was damn HUNGRY and they sure deserved it! Tch!
At least now I definitely know again why I don't like humans, though this place here? Is really the best of them. Within an hour of arriving here, I got 1) an attack by zombies (undeads in Assiah? What are they DOING in Hades? ... I bet that was because you destroyed the crucible. Nice work, really, nice work.); 2) an involuntary piggy-back ride by a gorilla; 3) bitten by a killer bunny; 4) ... one word: tentacles; 5) played ping-pong with by a nondescript entity and that stupid barrier.
I guess I'll have to give them points for creativity. However, what's this "youth delinquent camp" crap, and why does everything seem to agree that I belong here? I'm not a delinquent, I'm a demon! From a human's view, being evil is kind of my job, I guess.
Though I bet this is some kind of dimension-warp, because, duh SOMETHING is fishy here, I can just smell it! After all I've seen up to now, I wouldn't be terribly surprised if this were some conspiracy for the abduction of youths to brainwash them into something like the director's own revenge squad, though not for the murder, but because the murderer didn't bother to deliver the corpse to her, so she could use it for a damnation spell on the victim, so as to avenge her maiden's heart, which got brutally broken because the victim wasn't a "good boy". And afterwards, she'll have those freshly cleaned brains for dessert! What a bitch. Though if that really turns out to be the plan, she better be prepared for repercussions, cause I WILL bite back! I might also want to hit my head to some flat surface for the sheer idiocy.
...
So, I think my conclusion for now is that I don't like the sense of humor whoever is running this place seems to have. But, anyway, it's not like I'm here to stay.
Oh, and Setsuna? Don't you even THINK about hiding!
Poll Vote!
Character: Katara
Series: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Character Age: 14
Canon: Take four nations each with the power of one of the four elements. Add one war. Place one mystic peace keeper of the entire world known as the Avatar into an iceberg, and set aside for one hundred years. Release the Avatar, add one colorful band of allies trying to help him save the world, one Fire Nation trying to stop them. Mix well. Add some cabbages for seasoning and you have Avatar: The Last Airbender.
One of Aang's aforementioned colorful allies is Katara who, during an argument with her brother Sokka, accidentally frees the Avatar. Most of the time, she is mature, logical and kind-hearted, with a maternal streak a mile wide and an unflinching loyalty to her friends and convictions. However, Katara also has a quick temper, severe difficulty accepting a viewpoint other than her own, and the inability to keep her opinions to herself no matter what the situation. When she's not kicking Fire Nation butt and trying to keep her friends in line, Katara somehow finds the time for such pursuits as getting topped by dashing young freedom fighters. Over the course of the series, she becomes a master waterbender and in turn teaches the art to Aang.
Sample Post:
From his trusty treebranch, the young gorilla's heart was stirred by the sight of a beautiful maiden intrepidly exploring the treacherous territory below! The amorous ape was overcome with desire, not to mention the frustration that comes with being unable to get...a date! Grasping a handy vine, he swooped down to gather the pure and innocent damsel in his arms! The maiden melted into the embrace of the manly monkey of her dreams and--just what is all this?! I could write better than this in grade school! N-Not that I did, but that's beside the point! Anyway, what you're writing is completely untrue! Except for the part where I get called an intrepid, beautiful maiden. I like that part. But that sexist attitude has got to go! Girls can swing out of trees and pick up boys, too!
And you! Have you ever considered that the reason you can't get a date is because no girl in her right mind wants to go out with a guy who jumps out of trees and tries to pick them up without asking first?! A girl likes getting swept off her feet, I'll admit, but there's a line between what's romantic and what's creepy and you just crossed it!
...Stop making that face. Look, just because you don't know how to make a good impression doesn't mean you can't learn! I'll tell you what. How about I bend you a bath and give you some pointers on what you should do to get a girl then you find some nice ape-woman and let me get back to finding a way out of here, okay? Okay!
Personal hygiene is a must when you're trying to get a girl or anyone, really, to like you. I know this swamp water didn't make the most luxurious bath in the world, but it's better than nothing! Smelling like dead elbow-leech is an improvement over smelling like dead hog-monkey, I hope. The way to a girl's heart is not through having palms of sandpaper, and what have you been using to file your nails, anyway? On second thought, I don't want to know. It's not a hopeless case, though! I've got a great seaweed moisturizer that'll work wonders on your hands and this rock here will make a good nail file. Remember, you want to show her you're strong, but that you've got a sensitive side, too.
Add a few of these flowers--bright pink goes with everything, doesn't it?--And we're done! You actually look presentable, now go out there and find yourself an amorous ape of your very own!
Well, that wasn't so bad. I got the monkey off my back and now I can concentrate on what's important. Alright Katara, focus. Ignore the rabbit that's waving a paper around at you. Ignore the screams in the distance. Screams in the distance? Okay, okay, I'll read it! "Marcy felt as if she had been struck by Cupid's Arrow! Languidly stretching her tentacles above the waves, she wrapped them around her handsome prey. She would not rest until she had been artificially in-simian-ated by this gallant young gorilla!"
I can't let that happen! No one's getting in-simian-ated if I have anything to say about it!
Poll Vote!
Character: Matsunaga Sara
Series: Ever17 ~Out of Infinity~
Character Age: 16
Canon: Ever17 is the story of six (or is it seven? Or five?) young people who are trapped in an underwater theme park and have 119 hours to find a way to escape before the place implodes and they all drown. It's a little like The Poseidon Adventure, if The Poseidon Adventure were set in the future and had sinister pharmaceutical companies and time paradoxes and some interesting uses of mythology and quantum physics. So not much like it at all, really.
Matsunaga Sara is one of the aforementioned young people. She appears on the surface to be a more-or-less normal schoolgirl who's cheerful, friendly enough (if a bit on the quiet side sometimes), and fairly calm in emergencies. She also has something of an active imagination and likes to pretend to be a ninja (nin nin!). As it turns out, she's also a brilliant hacker, possibly the best in the world, despite her young age -- apparently she once won a worldwide hacking contest by cracking a difficult encryption in a very short time.
Sample Post:
All right, so I'm lost in a swamp. That's not good, of course. But freaking out about it isn't going to help, right? Anyway, it could be worse. For one thing, I've got this laptop which came flying out of nowhere and nearly hit me in the head. It's a pretty ancient model, but it seems to work well enough. Maybe it's got some kind of information about this place stored on it. Let me see, now...
"Welcome to Camp Fuck You Die, the happiest place on Earth"? Geez, what a weird name. Anyway, it looks like I need to log in... but the encryption's really simple, it should be child's play to crack it. Like a ninja in the night, swiftly and with stealth technology 100%, I shall sneak past the security and into the database! Nin nin!
Aha, there we go! I'm in! ... Wait a second, did the server just crash? I wasn't even trying... And why does it say "Database Error: The server is robust" when it's clearly not robust at all? I mean, if that was all it took to crash it, that's pretty pathetic. It ought to take some actual effort to bring it down like that, otherwise it's not much good, is it? I mean, what's the use of something like this if the server goes down every five minutes? That could get really frustrating, I would think.
Oh well, I guess there's nothing for it but to try again. Here I go, then, off on my mission to unlock the mysterious mysteries of this database (if indeed that's what it is)! ... Oh, what now? "Error: Please confirm you are a ninja by typing "..." below?" What kind of screening is that? I guess it couldn't hurt to do what it says, though. I mean, obviously I'm not going to get any further if I don't.
-- And I get a blank white screen?! Oh, I've had enough of this! Prepare yourself, you evil thing, for now I shall show you the true power of the Matsunaga School of Technological Ninjutsu! ... Just as soon as I can get this page to load, anyway.
Poll Vote!
Character: Coo Erhard
Series: DiGi Charat
Character Age: 13
Canon: DiGi Charat is a manga that involves lolis, cat girls, aliens, and pure crack. The plot is rather simple; Dejiko is the ten-year-old cat girl princess from the planet DiGi Charat who goes to earth to train to be a princess. Piyoko is the eight-year-old panda girl princess of Planet Analogue who has come to Earth to kidnap Dejiko and hold her for ransom. Along with her, she takes the evil Black Gema Gang which she leads, who are more silly than anything. A subsection in this gang called the “PKO” consists of three dog boy doctors who wait on her hand and foot. Crack ensues.
One of these boys is Coo Erhard, youngest member of the PKO and Piyoko’s childhood friend. Coo is generally the least serious of the three despite being a doctor, often joking around or distracted by food. Actually, Coo can be distracted by nearly anything, jumping around from subject to subject and conclusion to conclusion. He can also be outspoken, rude, energetic, occasionally cruel or nasty, and always very informal; speaking in slang and poor grammar. He may also tease Piyoko, but he would give his life for her if the situation ever came to it; proving that he can be serious when he needs to be. Though, that’s almost never. Come on, it’s DiGi Charat.
Sample Post:
So, let’s say you were hungry, right? Y’know, th’ kind of hungry where you’d do just ‘bout anything for food? …What’re you shaking your head for? You’re a zombie, you got to’ve gotten hungry at some point. Have some zombie pride, man.
Back to the story; ‘n listen good, I’ve got a pop quiz after. Okay, so you were so hungry, in fact, that you let your guard down, ‘n got yourself kidnapped by zombies from hell America Lousiana of all places, ‘n you’re in said place now. What would you do?
Hey hey, I saw that ‘spicious look in your eye! Yeah, th’ one that just fell outta your head. Don’t think I didn’t see that! So I know what you’re thinking, ‘n the answer is no, that didn’t happen to me. Really. Completely ignoring th’ fact that I came willingly. Look, you can’t deny an all-you-can-eat buffet, can you? Of course you can’t. Like I said, you’re a zombie, dude, and you like brains ‘n stuff. Otherwise you wouldn’t be here in Lousiana; and a camp either. Just lookit all the fresh meat! That isn’t me, I mean.
But ‘m off-topic, ‘n like all pop quizzers-something-or-other, I gotta get an answer. Like, an actual one cuz you guys seem to be th’ only ones who will. The gorillas’re way bigger than me and the campers are psycho, so no thanks. Most of ‘em aren’t that smart though, so no big difference from you zombies. So, c’mon. Answer already. Oh, and no life lines cuz you lost that option when ya died. Viva la afterlife or something.
….Eh? What? Oh, nope. Groaning erotically isn’t an answer. Actually, that was really really gross. Just for that, you’re going into th’ lake like th’ rest of th’ failed contestants. Haha; Bamf! Sucks to be you. But man, that’s like, the twentieth zombie today, ‘n it stopped being funny the first time ‘round. But eh, what can ya do? Though it was kinda a shame no one got th’ answer; it was so easy, too.
What d’ya do if you’re stuck in a bad horror camp in hell and or Lousiana? Why, nothing, a’course.
‘n by “nothing”, I mean “raid the mess hall”. Buh-bye! Guess who’s gonna eat like Th’ King tonight~
Poll Vote!
Character: Kakimoto Chikusa
Series: Katekyoy Hitman Reborn!
Character Age: second year of Jr. High
Canon: Sawada Tsunayoshi is no normal Junior High school kid. He's weak, cowardly, and isn't particularly good at anything. It wasn't as though he was happy with it, but he wasn't unhappy with it either. It was just a fact of life he had to deal with. Enter Reborn, the home tutor his mom hires for him. Reborn is no ordinary tutor, no, he was a top hitman (despite only being an infant) and he was here to teach Tsuna how to be a mafia boss. The 10th Boss of the Vongola famiy, to be exact. Unsurprisingly, Tsuna wasn't exactly jumping for joy when he heard, but due to circumstances that spun out of his control, he gathered his family about him ("They're just my friends!") as mafia bosses tend to do. However, he's also become a target because of his new position as the Tenth.
The Kokuyou Junior High Gang is one such group that targets Tsuna. Led by the couch rapist with a spinny eye, Rokudo Mukuro, the Gang attacks the strongest people at Tsuna's school in an effort to flush him out. It works. Mukuro's left and right hand men are Joushima Ken and Kakimoto Chikusa, both of whom are loyal to a fault. Of the two, Chikusa is the calmer. He's smart, knowledgeable, and rarely, if ever, loses his temper. He sees most things as 'troublesome' and prefers not to do more than necessary if possible. He's a very talented fighter and doesn't hesitate to hurt or kill, having a silent but strong desire to fight.
Sample Post:
'Camp Fuck You Die' is it? It doesn't look so scary to me, certainly not deserving of a name meant to frighten visitors. 'Fuck You, Die' indeed. It's just miles of swampland, no threats, no dangers, no reason why anyone should--Hn. That's something I haven't seen before.
A zombie from an old-fashioned horror movie? How amateur. Anyone with a basic knowledge of the human body knows a rotting body cannot walk. It's physically impossible, as muscles need to contract in order for movement, arteries and veins need to carry oxygen to and from the muscles in order to cause the aforementioned contraction, and a heart is necessary to pump the blood around the body. It is missing significant sections of its limbs and have a hollow chest cavity, yet is still managing motor functions without having the ligaments and tendons necessary to move bones and muscle.
Six of the eight bones that form its neurocranium are missing, exposing the contents, and if the little animals I can see crawling about inside the cranial vault are any indication, they have been gone for a long time. The brain should become incapable of function a long while ago, especially as it appears there are mealworms feeding off its gray matter. Seeing as it is apparently aware of its surroundings, capable of controlling limbs, awkward as its movements are, and vibrating vocal cords to create those senseless sounds, I have come to one conclusion. It clearly does not exist. An elaborate illusion, no doubt, created and designed to scare simplistic little children who know no better. Pathetic.
Hmm? An attempt to attack me will not elicit any type of fear in me. I'm not one to scream and run away--!!! Tch. Not an illusion, then? Or at least one that is quite powerful. How troublesome. I'm not interested in wasting my time and energy fighting something that shouldn't exist. Are you still going to try to fight me? I won't hold back, you know. Even if you've found a way to move despite the laws of physics, I promise you won't be able to do anything if your body parts are scattered over the ground. I'll break you to bits.
Come on, then. I want to finish this quickly. It's hot and I do not like to sweat.
Poll Vote!