valentine's day is coming early

[misswexler]

[There is a teenage girl shackled theatrically to a big cheap fold-out table near the mess hall, accompanied by a selection of giant sno-balls for your delectation. She's drumming her nails against the speckled surface and looking an awful lot like she wouldn't mind shredding the big white fold-out sign in front of her, with red sparkly letters

Comments

[boxbythebed]

You seem unqualified.

[misswexler]

And what leads you to that assessment?

[boxbythebed]

You know, just a feeling I get.

[misswexler]

Is your love life so troubled one must have credentials to hear tell?

[boxbythebed]

Yeah, actually.

[misswexler]

I screwed everybody over and I emerged on top, does that count?

[boxbythebed]

I don't need advice on how to be an awful person, thanks.

[misswexler]

Put others before yourself, walk a mile in their shoes, keep your voice down, don't be violent, provide positive reinforcement and a doggie biscuit.

[boxbythebed]

I think we're gonna have a bit of a problem with that violence part.

[misswexler]

Then my sage, sage love advice is that, as you are clearly aware, therein could lie the rub.

Or it was just a threat of bodily harm. Well?

[boxbythebed]

...

Why do you talk so weird?

[misswexler]

I'm sorry?

[she's excellent at hiding it, but there's the faintest defensive tightening of her posture]

[boxbythebed]

You talk strange. I asked why.

[misswexler]

I'm fairly certain that my vocabulary is more or less standard for an adolescent at my reading level.

[boxbythebed]

You sound like you ate a dictionary.

[misswexler]

It's the regrettable side effect of pursuing an education.