Time for some survival tl;dr.

[halfnakedsnake]

*Standing over there is a guy who looks kinda like Liquid Snake... except he has sunglasses on, his hair is tied back, and he's lacking a British accent. Hmm

Comments

[tengu_topper]

Ehhhhh, salt? That's cruel--you could just ask nicely! Marcy-chan's very reasonable.

[idkmybffjustice]

Ask ... nicely?

[tengu_topper]

That's right! Just ask her--say please!

[idkmybffjustice]

Ahh, I didn't think anyone would think of doing that.

[ineedbothhands]

Huh? But most of us have been here for way more than a month already.

[halfnakedsnake]

That's good, but don't lower your guard, and keep your senses on alert when in an unfamiliar area. Get some rest in a safe place if you get tired.

[ineedbothhands]

Yeah...most of the stuff here isn't too dangerous, so it's pretty easy to get by.

[cancelingblades]

You've gotta be kidding me.

[halfnakedsnake]

Take survival training seriously if you want to live in an unfamiliar territory. There are many types of difficult situations that can turn up at a moment's notice where a little knowledge can save your life.

[cancelingblades]

The area isn't exactly unfamiliar for me. Or a lot of people.

[halfnakedsnake]

Always keep your doors locked at night.

[thereshego]

Uuuuuuhhh I don't mean to tell you how to do your job here, buddy, but shouldn't you just be advising them to stay away from the tentacle monster thing in the first place?

[halfnakedsnake]

When going out into the woods there's always a risk of encountering dangerous wild animals. Don't wear perfumes that can attract bears and stay away from suspicious holes.

[thereshego]

Ookayy, if you're going to be like that, then elaboration. Gonna need it. What perfumes attract bears?

[halfnakedsnake]

Don't wear any perfume or cologne that smells like fruits and desserts, or any other kind of food. I've found myself that bears are especially attracted to Stila Midnight Bloom. But in general, nearly all perfumes attract bears.

145.73

[itcamefromcamp]

If you encounter the tentacle monster, you stand a chance of being tentacle raped. You can prevent tentacle rape by equipping a Chastity Belt. This will lower the chances of a tentacle's success. If you don't have a Chastity Belt, you can try going into the Survival Viewer and applying olive oil, which will halve the damage dealt by the tentacles for a short period of time. Other lubricants will be just as effective, but olive oil has the a wider range of uses, such as for cooking. Naturally, you shouldn't use olive oil with a condom, as the oil will break down any latex condoms. But it'll do just fine with tentacles.

[halfnakedsnake]

Out on the field, just about anything can wind up being useful in an emergency.

Carrying several bottles of olive oil in their inventory may save someone's life.