Maybe I Use Magic
Author: weatherfeather
Title: Maybe I Use Magic
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Gen or pre-Merlin/Arthur
Character/s: Merlin, Arthur
Summary: Arthur and Merlin visit a bookstore.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,038
Prompt: 466 Bingo - inexpensive
Author's Notes: Modern AU. Two friends who like going to bookstores. (A little over the word goal.) WHY are they so clueless, though?
"Arthur, check this out!"
Arthur looks away from the military history shelf in front of him to see Merlin gesturing at him from the end of the row of bookcases. Before he can take a step, Merlin has disappeared back the way he came.
Arthur decides two is enough: he tucks the history of the Mongol invasion of Europe and the one about the French invasion of Russia under his arm. He leaves the sketch of the Battle of Belleau Wood on the shelf for next time.
Then, Arthur heads out of the row he's in and spots Merlin nearby at a display table. He moves across the aisle to where Merlin is standing in front of small boxes of random paraphernalia.
"Look!" Merlin holds up a miniature figurine of Charles Dickens for Arthur to see.
"That'll fit in on your shelf," Arthur comments.
"It's not for the shelf. See?" Merlin tips the mini Dickens forward over his other hand, and a thin line of salt pours out from its eyes.
Arthur frowns. "Why would they make that?"
"I think the real question is: why do they have a sample filled with salt in a bookstore? But look, there's one for each of the Brontë sisters."
"Book lover accessories can be so strange," Arthur says.
"Some are better than others. The Stephen Hawking one is too soon."
"Why would they even-"
"I know." Merlin shuffles a few more of the boxes - Lewis Carroll, Beatrix Potter, Shakespeare - and pulls out a Neil Gaiman. "Yes! Are you done browsing? We should probably go pay before I decide to get one of each of these."
Arthur throws his free arm around Merlin's neck and steers them toward the front of the store and the cashier. "Let's go before this inexpensive bookstore visit turns into real shopping."
"You're no fun," Merlin pouts.
Arthur shakes Merlin a little. "The bowing shelves on your bookcases are thanking me."
Merlin looks pointedly at Arthur's haul. "I see yours are in for another test of endurance and strength. What are those, a thousand pages each?"
"Don't be silly. They'd be split into several volumes if they got that long. They're only 600 each, give or take."
Merlin raises an eyebrow.
Merlin has a point: that's still over a thousand pages altogether. Arthur gives in: "Maybe I use magic to hold up my shelves."
Merlin gasps dramatically. "And you left my shelves subject to the laws of gravity with such abilities at your disposal? No, wait." He thinks for a moment. "You're more likely to build the structure by hand first and then use the magic to make all the history books from the next three counties float calmly through your window to fill the shelves."
Arthur gives Merlin a blank look. "But then how would I compensate all those book sellers for all of those books?"
Merlin laughs. "Oh, Arthur. I'm sure you can strategize something."
They turn the corner of the last half-wall of books, and Merlin trips over his own feet. Arthur keeps a steady hold on him, but the salt shaker box tumbles from his hand.
"Maybe I can use magic to hold you up," Arthur says.
"Why would I need that when you do such a good job of keeping me upright already? Speaking of, can you let go now so I can get my box?"
Arthur removes his arm from Merlin's shoulders.
Merlin grabs the box off the floor and straightens up. "Let's get out of here before I turn the whole place into a dominoes display."
"I would never let you destroy property so publicly," Arthur promises as they join the queue.
"Thanks. You're a real pal."
Arthur's arm finds its favorite resting place around Merlin's neck again. "Plus, these units are heavier than they look. They'd knock you down before you could make them fall all over each other."
Merlin elbows him. "Did I say pal? More like an annoying barnacle that I can't scrape off."
"What are you, a whale?"
"Baleen. I like krill."
"Merlin," Arthur growls.
"Yes, Arthur?"
"Shut up."
"Can't. Got to keep you entertained somehow."
They're next in line, but Arthur says, "Let's go back to the stacks. I think I saw an oceanography section. Maybe I can make you eat your words."
Arthur takes a step away, but Merlin grabs him by the shirt.
"Oh no you don't," Merlin says as he pulls Arthur back into place. "I know there are other books you want here. If I let you go back there, your marvelous restraint from round one will crumble to nothing. Moderation! We're doing so well!"
"Merlin," Arthur says.
"What? You know I'm right."
"The cashier is ready for us."
Merlin whips around. "Oh." He drags Arthur to the counter with him by the shirt. The box falls out of Merlin's hand again and slides on the counter, but it doesn't fall off the edge.
Arthur places his books on the counter as well.
"That'll be £25," the cashier tells them.
Merlin already has his portion out - and released Arthur's shirt to do so, - and Arthur adds his cash to it.
"Receipt?"
"Yes, please," Merlin answers.
The cashier makes a stack of the books and the salt shaker box and puts the receipt on top before sliding the whole pile back across the counter.
"Have a nice day."
"And you," Arthur replies politely.
They're outside the shop with their purchases before Arthur says, "Thanks for that." He doesn't elaborate.
Merlin elbows him.
"I know same as you do that we would have left with half the store if we'd gone back for any reason," Arthur says.
"Is this Shopaholics Anonymous?"
"Is that a thing?"
"Yes, it's a thing." Merlin gets a puzzled look on his face. "I think."
"Fine. Still, as you say, you're a pal."
"Oh? Does this role come with any perks? Member benefits, perhaps?"
"I think we can call it even, don't you? It's like a mutual life-assist program."
Merlin smiles crookedly. "Yeah. No worries. I got your back."
Arthur puts Merlin under his arm again. As they walk, he says, "Some lunch would be a good perk about now, though. What do you think?"
Title: Maybe I Use Magic
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Gen or pre-Merlin/Arthur
Character/s: Merlin, Arthur
Summary: Arthur and Merlin visit a bookstore.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,038
Prompt: 466 Bingo - inexpensive
Author's Notes: Modern AU. Two friends who like going to bookstores. (A little over the word goal.) WHY are they so clueless, though?
"Arthur, check this out!"
Arthur looks away from the military history shelf in front of him to see Merlin gesturing at him from the end of the row of bookcases. Before he can take a step, Merlin has disappeared back the way he came.
Arthur decides two is enough: he tucks the history of the Mongol invasion of Europe and the one about the French invasion of Russia under his arm. He leaves the sketch of the Battle of Belleau Wood on the shelf for next time.
Then, Arthur heads out of the row he's in and spots Merlin nearby at a display table. He moves across the aisle to where Merlin is standing in front of small boxes of random paraphernalia.
"Look!" Merlin holds up a miniature figurine of Charles Dickens for Arthur to see.
"That'll fit in on your shelf," Arthur comments.
"It's not for the shelf. See?" Merlin tips the mini Dickens forward over his other hand, and a thin line of salt pours out from its eyes.
Arthur frowns. "Why would they make that?"
"I think the real question is: why do they have a sample filled with salt in a bookstore? But look, there's one for each of the Brontë sisters."
"Book lover accessories can be so strange," Arthur says.
"Some are better than others. The Stephen Hawking one is too soon."
"Why would they even-"
"I know." Merlin shuffles a few more of the boxes - Lewis Carroll, Beatrix Potter, Shakespeare - and pulls out a Neil Gaiman. "Yes! Are you done browsing? We should probably go pay before I decide to get one of each of these."
Arthur throws his free arm around Merlin's neck and steers them toward the front of the store and the cashier. "Let's go before this inexpensive bookstore visit turns into real shopping."
"You're no fun," Merlin pouts.
Arthur shakes Merlin a little. "The bowing shelves on your bookcases are thanking me."
Merlin looks pointedly at Arthur's haul. "I see yours are in for another test of endurance and strength. What are those, a thousand pages each?"
"Don't be silly. They'd be split into several volumes if they got that long. They're only 600 each, give or take."
Merlin raises an eyebrow.
Merlin has a point: that's still over a thousand pages altogether. Arthur gives in: "Maybe I use magic to hold up my shelves."
Merlin gasps dramatically. "And you left my shelves subject to the laws of gravity with such abilities at your disposal? No, wait." He thinks for a moment. "You're more likely to build the structure by hand first and then use the magic to make all the history books from the next three counties float calmly through your window to fill the shelves."
Arthur gives Merlin a blank look. "But then how would I compensate all those book sellers for all of those books?"
Merlin laughs. "Oh, Arthur. I'm sure you can strategize something."
They turn the corner of the last half-wall of books, and Merlin trips over his own feet. Arthur keeps a steady hold on him, but the salt shaker box tumbles from his hand.
"Maybe I can use magic to hold you up," Arthur says.
"Why would I need that when you do such a good job of keeping me upright already? Speaking of, can you let go now so I can get my box?"
Arthur removes his arm from Merlin's shoulders.
Merlin grabs the box off the floor and straightens up. "Let's get out of here before I turn the whole place into a dominoes display."
"I would never let you destroy property so publicly," Arthur promises as they join the queue.
"Thanks. You're a real pal."
Arthur's arm finds its favorite resting place around Merlin's neck again. "Plus, these units are heavier than they look. They'd knock you down before you could make them fall all over each other."
Merlin elbows him. "Did I say pal? More like an annoying barnacle that I can't scrape off."
"What are you, a whale?"
"Baleen. I like krill."
"Merlin," Arthur growls.
"Yes, Arthur?"
"Shut up."
"Can't. Got to keep you entertained somehow."
They're next in line, but Arthur says, "Let's go back to the stacks. I think I saw an oceanography section. Maybe I can make you eat your words."
Arthur takes a step away, but Merlin grabs him by the shirt.
"Oh no you don't," Merlin says as he pulls Arthur back into place. "I know there are other books you want here. If I let you go back there, your marvelous restraint from round one will crumble to nothing. Moderation! We're doing so well!"
"Merlin," Arthur says.
"What? You know I'm right."
"The cashier is ready for us."
Merlin whips around. "Oh." He drags Arthur to the counter with him by the shirt. The box falls out of Merlin's hand again and slides on the counter, but it doesn't fall off the edge.
Arthur places his books on the counter as well.
"That'll be £25," the cashier tells them.
Merlin already has his portion out - and released Arthur's shirt to do so, - and Arthur adds his cash to it.
"Receipt?"
"Yes, please," Merlin answers.
The cashier makes a stack of the books and the salt shaker box and puts the receipt on top before sliding the whole pile back across the counter.
"Have a nice day."
"And you," Arthur replies politely.
They're outside the shop with their purchases before Arthur says, "Thanks for that." He doesn't elaborate.
Merlin elbows him.
"I know same as you do that we would have left with half the store if we'd gone back for any reason," Arthur says.
"Is this Shopaholics Anonymous?"
"Is that a thing?"
"Yes, it's a thing." Merlin gets a puzzled look on his face. "I think."
"Fine. Still, as you say, you're a pal."
"Oh? Does this role come with any perks? Member benefits, perhaps?"
"I think we can call it even, don't you? It's like a mutual life-assist program."
Merlin smiles crookedly. "Yeah. No worries. I got your back."
Arthur puts Merlin under his arm again. As they walk, he says, "Some lunch would be a good perk about now, though. What do you think?"