Realm of the Muse 1.87.2: A surfeit of eggnog
After drinking a few too many eggnogs at your annual holiday party, you wake up the next morning realizing you did some things you now regret. Write an e-mail, a letter or a card to the people you need to apologize to.
Q,
Upon receiving this letter you doubtlessly will be aware of a few…damages…sustained to your laboratory. I take responsibility for these damages. I was intoxicated. Moneypenny’s eggnog was quite delicious.
If you must know how the damages were sustained, it happened as thus: 0014 and I, in a heightened state of intoxication, broke into the laboratory and proceeded to, for lack of a better word, play with your gadgets, a childish act which culminated in the destruction of many pieces of furniture, including several tables, by the use of the ghetto blaster, which, at the time, was playing a rousing rendition of the “1812 Overture.”
As you are doubtlessly aware, I frequent many casinos around the world. I will gladly donate any and all winnings gained at these casinos to aide in the inevitable restoration of your laboratory, as well as to compensate for any gadgets damaged or lost in last night's mayhap.
Yours apologetically,
J.B.
--
Moneypenny,
I hope you find this letter while in good spirits. I apologize for having left you before you woke, but, as you are well aware, the life of a 00 is a busy one. Your eggnog was divine. I look forward to having more of it in future Christmas parties, though I will, of course, consume far less of it than I did this year.
Please do not let what happened last night interfere with our professional relationship. What happened was wonderful for both of us, I am sure, though I don’t remember any of it, but we must now focus on the important work we do for Her Majesty's Secret Service.
Yours in friendship,
J.B.
--
M,
Please disregard my letter of resignation. I meant not a word of it. I do not believe you are an inconsiderate cunt-faced swot who would feed his own grandchildren to undernourished, maltempered sharks. I do not currently hold any objections to the way you have run or organization, and, in fact, commend you on the handling of the Johannesburg operation. The letter which I believe may cause you some offense was written under the influence of alcohol. I promise to be more temperate in the future.
Yours,
J.B.
[ ooc: it appears m has written a response! i.e.: my dork. let me show you it. ]