Love & Softball (Chapter 44)
Title: Love & Softball
Author: BrennaAimee
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Rating: PG 13
Summary: Callie transfers to a new high school from one where she is a softball star. Can she prove she belongs on this new team and impress the captain in more ways than she knows.
Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. This is for entertainment purposes only, no profit is being made.
A/N: This chapter is also for My Dougie (a.k.a Fabi or iFabi) I love u gurl, u are amazing! U make me smile all the time. I hope this chapter is everything u want it to be. <3
A/N#2: Happy Early Birthday to my Dened! A 'your sized' chapter to celebrate ;)
A/N: #2 Sorry about the delay, my computer decided it wanted to kill over, so I have no laptop, and trying to write in the university center sucks. I hate writing in silence. I hope you enjoy this chapter and can forgive me for the time it takes. I’ll get the next one up when I can. Love yall. =)
|Callie’s P.O.V|
I see Arizona walk past Adrienne and to the back of the bleachers telling us to hold on as she goes.
Adrienne takes a step toward me and wraps her arms around my waist hugging me. I wrap my arms around her shoulders and kiss her forehead. Adrienne steps back and looks over toward Arizona. I turn and do the same. I see Arizona talking to some girl who doesn’t look too pleased. I turn back to Adrienne and after a couple of minutes I feel someone’s hand on my shoulder. I turn around and lock eyes with Arizona. I run my eyes downward and see her hand slightly behind her. Her fingers are interlaced with someone else’s. I run my eyes up and chocolate brown meets bright green. The girl unlocks eyes with me and looks me up and down seeming to be sizing me up. She gives me a ‘less than impressed’ face and looks back to Arizona. ‘Who does this girl think she is?’ I think to myself.
“Callie, Adrienne, this is Lita, my girlfriend. Lita, this is Adrienne and Callie.” She says pointing at each of us.
“Nice to meet you” Adrienne says smiling. Lita looks at her and smiles slightly
“You too” Lita replies. “. . . and you as well.” She says about the time I look away from her to Arizona.
Arizona locks eyes with me and even though she seems ok I can see the worried look in her eyes. I try to see what she is thinking. I notice Lita wrap her arms around Arizona’s waist in a protective stance. When she does this, Arizona looks away from me like she is doing something wrong. I now realize why she was worried. She knows that her girlfriend is jealous and doesn’t know if we will get along. As much as I want to be a bitch to her after the way she looked at me I can’t because this is Arizona’s girlfriend and she said she makes her happy.
“So, Lita, when did you get here?” I ask trying to be civil.
“At the beginning of the game I sat two rows up higher on the bleachers than you. I saw you coach my girl here.” She says tightening up her grip on Arizona.
“Yeah, I know how much this sport has always meant to her and I saw the opening for you. She just needed someone to point it out.”
“You play for another team though, and from the looks of it” She says looking me up and down “you are still in the tournament. So, why are you trying to help someone on a different team?”
“Umm . . . Arizona is my best friend so I want her to succeed even if that means she gets ahead in the competition.”
“You two know each other outside of here?” She says looking at Arizona.
“Yeah babe, this Callie is Callie Torres, from back home.”
My phone starts ringing in my pocket and everyone’s eyes land on me. I pull the phone out of my pocket and check the screen. Coach O.
“Excuse me, Coach O is calling.”
“Wait, let me pick it up.” Arizona laughs and I hand her the phone.
“Hello. . . No, Callie isn’t available right now. . . Whoa whoa Coach O calm down . . . you know you have never handled that temper of yours very well. . . Yes . . . its AZ . . . Yeah, I’m at the competition . . . I’ll come see you sometime. . . NO Coach O. . . Adrienne is right here too.” She tries to whisper. “Of course I will try to come see you sometime while we are here . . . Love you too. . . Here’s Callie.” She hands me the phone with a slight blush tinting her face. I have a feeling it has something to do with what she was trying to whisper.
I turn around and finish my call with Coach O. She says she wants details on the thing with Arizona and we had a team meeting tonight. She tells me that we are headed back to the hotel in fifteen minutes. I hang up the phone and walk back to Adry, Arizona, and Lita.
“The team is leaving in fifteen.” I announce and turn to Adry “Can we go ahead and head to the bus?”
“Yeah, if you’re ready babe.”
“It was nice to meet you Lita.” I reach out to shake her hand. “I’ll see you later.” I say looking at Arizona. She steps up and Adry gives her a hug and she turns to give me one as well. I look over her shoulder at Lita who is staring a hole in us. I tighten my grip on her before letting go watching the emotion run across Lita’s face. I smirk when I get the reaction I want, pure jealousy. I know I shouldn’t be like that, but if she wants to look at me like that I can play her game too. Adry grabs my hand and we head off toward the bus together.
|Arizona’s P.O.V|
I watch Callie leave and I turn around to face Lita. When my eyes meet hers I can tell she isn’t happy.
“What’s wrong?”
“That is Callie.” She deadpans.
“Yeah?” I question.
“Callie as in your ex Callie, she is the reason I couldn’t have you in the first place and when I get here I see her coach you through the winning hit and then you practically kiss her in front of me?”
“Lita, I didn’t know you were here. . . “ I start before she interrupts me.
“Oh, that just makes it sound so much better.” She retorts sarcastically.
“Ok, first off we aren’t starting this conversation like this.” I say when I see the rest of the team leaving and the coach looking at me. “We will finish this at the hotel. I have to go. See you there.” I say kissing her cheek before going to get my bag and walking back with the team.
|30 Minutes Later|
I hear a knock on my room door and Catarina answers it. I look up from the place I had just taken on the bed after putting on pjs. Cat moves out of the way to let Lita walk in. She goes to grab her things and heads to the shower. Lita grabs the desk chair and pulls it over to the bed, like she doesn’t even want to sit on the bed with me.
“Ok, would you like to explain now?” She finally says.
“Lita, I have nothing to explain to you. Yes Callie is my ex, but we have moved past that and she is my best friend. I have told you a million times nothing is going to get between that and you have said you understood, and what you said earlier? I did not practically kiss her in front of you. I hugged her and kissed her cheek as thanks. I kiss my friends on the cheek all the time it’s nothing new, so why are you acting like this now? You have no reason to. I don’t care if Callie and I do share a history, I would never do that to you. You are the person I am with and the person I want to be with. I get it, you are jealous, and at times it is cute, but with this it’s not because you are taking it too far.”
“AZ” She says leaning in to take my hand. “I’m sorry, but it is like I said before, she is the reason I couldn’t have you in the first place. You are the most amazing person I have ever met and to be with you is like an opportunity of a life time. So, when I know how she used to have a grip on your heart it’s hard not to get carried away. I’m sorry ok?” She says regret filling her bright green eyes.
“It’s ok, but I’m going to tell you this once and I’m not going to say it again, I have friends and I’m not going to treat one friend any different because we have a history. You have to trust me. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“Ok AZ, I’m sorry. Forgive me?”
“Of course” I say giving her a kiss. “Oh, by the way” I say pulling back “we are going out tonight.”
“Really now?” She says with a smirk on her face. “Just where are we going?”
“We are going out with Calliope and Adrienne.” Her face drops when I say Calliope.
“Just us?”
“Well, I have to text Callie and ask her. It may turn into a group thing.” I see Cat walk out of the shower. “Hey, Cat, do you have anything to do tonight?”
“Oh, yeah, run around the hotel? No I’ll pass. I’ve done that enough. What are we getting into?” She laughs.
“May go out with a group me, Lita, Adrienne, Callie, you and I don’t know who else. I have to text Callie and ask her if its ok.”
“Just let me know, I’m going to go hang out with AC, Bonet, and Alvarez.” She says grabbing some stuff and heading out. I grab my phone before grabbing my clothes and heading to take a shower. Before I get in I text Calliope.
‘Hey when we go out 2night do u want 2 make it a group thing? I think it will make Lita more comfortable this go around.’ I type and press send.
‘Sure I’ll ask Cris 2 come and maybe a couple girls from the team Adrienne said we could go eat and go bowling if that works 4 u.’
‘Fine by me, what time do u want to meet?’
‘I have a team meeting around 7 so 9? We can go midnight bowling I don’t have a game until 3 2morrow.’
‘k that works see u 2night.’ I press send and smile. I get to spend more time with Calliope.
|Later that night|
|Callie’s P.O.V|
We are about to get out of our team meeting and I feel someone’s hand on my arm. I turn to look and its Coach O.
“What’s up Coach?”
She looks around to make sure everyone had either left or was out of earshot before continuing. “So, how long have you known AZ was here?”
“Since the day before yesterday, we just kind of ran into each other at the park after Adrienne got here.”
“So, you haven’t been alone together?”
“We talked late last night.”
“Alone?” She questions giving me a stern look.
“Yes Coach alone.”
“Callie, I know what she means to you and honestly I believe you two belong together and fate has a weird way of bringing two people together, but don’t let this affect your playing. We are so close to this, and honestly? I don’t want to see that hurt on your face like I have. You have a good thing going with Adrienne right? “I nod. “Ok, don’t mess it up.”
“I’m not Coach O. Arizona and I are just friends. It isn’t going to affect my playing. We are going to do this and I’m not going to do anything to hurt Adrienne. I love her.”
“Ok kid I’m just trying to look out for you, you know you are like my own.”
“I know, and thanks for everything.”
“Don’t mention it; now go get some rest tonight.”
“Don’t count on that Coach.” I say and walking away quickly.
“Callie Torres!” She yells after me and I keep walking. I have to laugh when I turn the corner and see her out the corner of my eye shaking her head.
|2 Hours Later|
We are sitting in the pizza place that we found down the road. We have a group of ten and we have pushed a couple of tables together. It is me, Adry, Arizona, Lita, Cristina V, Catarina, AC, Jessica, Desirea, and Megan. Adry and I are sitting on one end of the table and Arizona and Lita are on the other table. Everyone is talking and getting along great. My phone starts going off playing ‘No Love’ part of Lil Wayne’s verse.
‘I think about more than I forget, but I don’t go around fire expecting not to sweat. . . ‘ My phone plays before I can pick it up. I check it New Message >View now or >View Later. I press view now and read a text from Mark telling me what is going on with him and Addison. I quickly text him back and give him a little advice before sitting the phone back down and continuing the conversation I was having with Cristina V.
‘Little piece of me you can't have And I know that it's driving you mad Little part inside you can't reach I'm afraid that's the way it's gonna be’ My phone starts playing and I look down the table at Arizona. I set that as her ringtone as soon as I got her number back. That will always be our song, so just like old times I wanted it as her ringtone. Arizona looks down the table and locks eyes with me giving her shifty eyed confused look. I don’t think she was expecting to have a set ringtone, much less our song as the tone. I honestly don’t think she even wanted me or anyone else to know she was texting me. I can’t help but to smile at the shine I see in her eyes. I pick up my phone and read her message.
‘u know u look beautiful 2night - AZ’
‘;) u don’t look 2 bad urself’ I send back and put my phone in my pocket, smiling like a fool.
“Who was that?” Adrienne leans in to ask me.
“Umm, it was Arizona she thinks that Cristina V and Cat have something going on.” I say glancing down the table where Cris and Cat were laughing and joking.
“Oh, ok.” She smiles and places her hand on my thigh.
We arrive at the bowling alley. Lita and Adrienne park beside each other and the group starts to walk in. We get to the counter and make sure we get lanes beside each other. Everyone in our car decides to play together and everyone in Lita’s car plays on the other lane. We all get our shoes and go find the bowling balls that suit our preferences.
“Let’s make this fun, lane vs. lane.” Cristina V suggests.
“We can take you.” Cat snaps back jokingly.
“Is everyone cool with that?” I ask.
“What Calliope, you scared of a little competition?” Arizona says stepping up to me smirking.
“What competition?” I reply sarcastically. “Sweetie, you have never been competition for me.” I say getting in her face. We both begin to laugh and step away all getting ready to bowl. We enter our names into the line up and start the game. Through the whole game everyone is getting along great, we are all talking shit and being the competitors we all are. Through the whole game I can’t help but to steal glances over at Arizona and her girlfriend who are always hugging, kissing, or touching somehow. I know I shouldn’t be jealous, but I am, even though I am sitting there doing the same thing. I know that Arizona still has some kind of feelings for me, but it just seems like all this is affecting me more. Every time I see them acting all in love it hurts, but I can’t look away.
Arizona’s team wins by thirty points and of course her competitive nature comes out and she is talking shit about being the winner and giving me tips on bowling. She is so cute when she is gloating. We start out next game and decide this one is just for fun.
It gets to be my turn and I go to pick up my ball. As soon as I get my grip on the ball and pick it up, I look up the see Arizona standing in front of me and smiling at me.
“Oh, Calliope, could you use some of my superior wisdom?” She sarcastically says.
“You know what? I’m sure I could, do you think you could give me a few pointers on this . . . umm . . . Robbins Method . . . of bowling.” I say winking at her. I slight blush creeps up on her cheek.
“I’m sure I could help you a little.” She says stepping over in my lane. I walk up to where I need to stand before walking and releasing the ball. I pause looking at her standing beside me.
“Ok, here is what we are going to do. You need to stand over to the right a little.” I step over to where she said to please her.
“Yeah, right there.” She puts her hand on her chin acting like she is studying the lane and me. “Ok, now I’m going to need you to take a couple of steps and release the ball right about here.” She says putting out her arm and stopping it where she was saying. “I’m going to need for you to hit all those pins down because I am the one coaching you here.” She says smirking. “Ok, get to it.” She steps back.
I walk up and release the ball and only leave one pin standing. She walks back up to me and stands with her hands on her hips looking at the one pin that remained upright.
“Ok now Calliope, I’m working with you here, but I’m going to need you to hit that pin down because I need you to make me look good here.” She mumbles jokingly.
I step up and start to walk to the pins releasing the ball and knocking down the one pin.
“Yep, that was my coaching.” She says throwing up her hands before going to bowl on her own lane. I just shake my head and walk over and sit beside Adry. Adry gets up to bowl and I pull my phone out of my pocket.
‘Oh, so that was all u?’ I send to Arizona.
I see her pull her phone out of her pocket, read the message, and respond to it. ‘yeah, u know, the Robbins Method is always a winner ;)’
‘I definitely remember it being one hell of a method ;) but then again, maybe u r just my good luck charm.’
She reads the message and closes it quickly as Lita walks back up to her, never responding to my text. Soon I’m up to bowl again.
“So, do you need my wisdom again, or do you think you can do it this time?” Arizona yells from where she is sitting in the other lane.
“You want to make sure I got it.” I say provoking her to come.
She walks up next to me again and stands while I bowl. I bowl a strike.
“Yeah, it was an excuse for you to be over here, but I mean maybe you are my good luck charm.” I mumble where only we can hear. We continue to bowl and I look around and see that AC and Catarina are gone. I finally spot them in the arcade and see that other people are bowling for them.
Soon Catarina comes back and starts bowling for herself. Eventually Cristina comes back and we continue to play. People are starting to be back and forth and I get focused on the game. After a little while, I look around and see that Arizona is nowhere in sight. I figure she just went to the bathroom or something because I don’t see her at the concessions or in the arcade. When I look around five minutes later and she still isn’t around, I pull out my phone and text her. When I don’t get a text within two minutes I decide to go look for her.
“Hey babe, I’m going to go to the restroom, I’ll be right back.”
“Ok” Adrienne says giving me a kiss and getting off my lap.
I walk to the bathroom and call for Arizona, when I get no answer I go and make sure she isn’t in the arcade. I don’t see her in there so I look back and make sure no one is paying attention to me before I walk outside. I look from side to side and don’t see her anywhere. I walk to our cars and she isn’t in there. I look to one of the ends of the building and see a form sitting up against the edge of the wall on the other side. I slowly make my way in that direction. As I get closer, I can tell it is her. She is staring off into the distance, not paying attention to her surroundings, much less me walking up to her.
“Penny for your thoughts?” I say before sitting on the other side of her.
She still just stares out not really wanting to acknowledge my presence, but I see her look in my direction out the corner of her eye.
“Come on, Arizona, talk to me.”
“It’s nothing Callie. I’m just not feeling well.”
“Arizona, that’s not true and you know it. I know you well enough to know how you look when you are sick, or don’t feel well, and what I see right now is that focused look you have when you have something on your mind. You need someone to talk to, why not take advantage of the fact that your best friend is right here with you?”
“What if it is about my best friend?” She says closing her eyes and looking down.
“Then your best friend will probably understand whatever you need to talk about.” I say putting my arm around her and pulling her to lean into me.
“I don’t know what to do. I know we are going our separate ways for the right reasons, but it is still hard. We were bowling and you called me your good luck charm. We were eating and I text you to I hear our song play. You helped me through the game like old times and I ran to you. I went to kiss your cheek and almost kissed your lips, and since that moment that’s all I can think about. I almost finally did what I’ve wanted to do ever since I saw you again. I want it, but an accident is the only way it would happen because of who we are. I’ll never apologize for being who I am and I wouldn’t love you if you were any other way. I see you in there with Adrienne and I can’t help but wish it was me. All of this is just reminding me of what we use to have, and is making me miss it more and more.”
“Arizona . . . believe me, I know exactly what you mean. All night all I have been able to do is steal looks over at you and Lita and I get jealous. I have been talking myself down every time because I don’t have the right to be that way, because you are not mine. This is hurting the both of us, but the only way to fix it is to push ourselves past it. We can’t sit out here and avoid it because it won’t help and I’m pretty sure they will notice shortly.”
“Thank you” She says.
“Just know you aren’t going through it alone, I’m not sure if that helps, but it is true.”
She smiles at me, kisses my forehead and stands up.
“Are you coming?” She says turning around.
“I’ll be there in a few.” I smile and let her walk off. I sit outside for a few more minutes. I pull out my phone and text Adrienne to tell her I went to the car for a second and I would be in a minute. I try to process everything for myself before getting up and going into the bowling alley to face my pain.
|1 Year Later|
|Arizona’s P.O.V|
Lita runs into the apartment two hours early from work and looks completely shaken up.
“Babe, what’s wrong.” I say from where I am sitting on the couch reading a book. She ignores me and picks up her pace walking into the bedroom quickly. I place my bookmark on the page I was reading and head into the bedroom. I was hoping today would be an easy day, I didn’t have work nor did I have softball practice. I open the bedroom door and see a suit case on the bed and Lita throwing items in there.
“What . . . what is going on?” She still is oblivious to my presence and I listen to her mumbling. I can tell she is rattling off what sounds like a list. She is going back and forth from the dresser to the closet grabbing things and throwing them to the bed.
“Lita” I say trying to get her attention and it doesn’t work. I go to stand beside the path she is pacing and watch her for a second. When she still doesn’t acknowledge my presence I reach out and grab her.
“AZ stop, just stop. I don’t have time. I have to go.”
“You have to go where?”
“My mom . . . they called me at work . . . She . . . something happened . . . no one is there . . . no one except Zay . . . and he . . . he is too young . . . I . . . I got to go.” She says shaking and trying to keep gathering items.
“Lita stop.” I say wrapping my arms around her and forcing her to stop moving. Up until now she was doing a pretty decent job at not crying, but as soon as I got a good grip on her she let it go. She starting shaking sobs rattling through her body and I know the only time she cries like this is when she is scared.
“Calm down babe” I say as I pull her to sit down on the bed. She leans into me and I run my hand up and down her back trying to comfort her. “Breathe and tell me what happened.”
“They . . . they called me at work . . . there was a wreck . . . Zay is the only person there . . . He is . . . nothing happened to him. Mom. . . . Mom is in the ICU. They don’t know if she is going to make . . .” She tries to say and then shakes her head.
“Shhh, shhh calm down. Everything is going to be ok. You need to go get Zay. You can bring him to stay with us or you can stay at your mom’s place until everything has calmed down. She is going to be fine ok? We can handle this. We have a practice tomorrow. I will tell coach what happened and if you stay I will come right after practice ok? Lay here for a minute and try to calm down. You can’t drive like this. I’ll finish packing for you.” I say as I lay her down on the bed and rub my hand over her hair and kissing her forehead.
I get up and finish her packing hoping that Momma J is going to be ok. She really is a sweetheart and doesn’t deserve anything like this to happen to her. I start getting worried and I just have to look over at the bed to my now broken girlfriend and know that I have to stay strong for her, so she can be strong for her little brother Zay.
Soon, after I decide she is ok enough to drive, I am sending her off to the hospital and telling her to call me when she gets there. I expect the call within three hours since we live about two and a half hours from home.
|The next day|
As soon as I finish practice I head to the locker rooms on campus to take a shower. I already have my bags packed and in the car ready to drive to Lita. I haven’t heard much from her besides her telling me she arrived safely and a text saying she was staying there for a while.
I get out of the shower and talk to a couple of my teammates for a few minutes and rush out to the car. I get on the road and I arrive within two hours. I might have a bit of a lead foot. I pull up at her house even though I know she isn’t there. I walk up on the porch and find the spare key and go place my bags in her old room. I run back downstairs and text her that I will be at the hospital shortly.
About twenty minutes later I’m pulling up to the hospital. I get out of the car and go inside trying to find the intensive care unit. After I ask one of the security guards and he points me in the right direction, I find it with little trouble. I see Lita and Zay sitting in the waiting room for visiting hours. Zay sees me before Lita and starts running toward me. Lita looks up to scold him, but sees me and stops. I pick Zay up and hold him tightly to me. I carry him and go sit beside Lita. She looks at me and with just one look I can tell her condition hasn’t gotten any better.
I open my arm and wrap it around her pulling her close. She lays her head on my shoulder and closes her eyes. My guess is she didn’t get any sleep last night, nor did she close her eyes.
Ten minutes later, I see a doctor come into the waiting room. He looks around and his eyes land on us. I can tell the Zay and Lita are already fast asleep on me. The doctor approaches slowly.
“Excuse me ma’am, are you family?”
“I’m with her.” I say tilting my head to where Lita was sleep on me.
“Can we wake her, it is kind of important.” I nod and gently shift Zay to where he is laying square on my chest. I turn a little and try to slowly coax Lita awake.
“Babe, wake up. . . Lita, the doctor is here.” I see her eyes gently flutter open and she sits up slowly recognizing the doctor in front of us.
“Ms Walker, can I have a word with you please?” Lita looks over at me concern filling her bright green eyes.
“Go, I got Zay.” I say leaning over to kiss her forehead. The doctor nods to me and leads her out of the room.
Within ten minutes Lita comes back in, eyes blood shot. She sits down beside me and lays her head back on my shoulder, rubbing Zay’s head.
“What did he say?” I ask cautiously.
“She may not make it through the night. We need to be prepared. Arizona can you do me a favor?”
“Anything babe”
“Can you take Zay home tonight? Only one person can be in the room with her and I want, no, I need to be by her side. Please?”
“Of course, I’ll go by my parent’s house first and then I’ll take him home.”
“What. . . What are we going to do? We don’t have any family. Zay is going to be my responsibility. A six year old little boy and I have school and work. Zay has to be in school too, and I . . . I just don’t know.”
“Lita, babe, stop. You have family because you have me. We can figure this out together ok? Don’t worry; you will be fine no matter what. We will be fine. Zay has you and he has me too. Do you want us to leave soon so you can go back there?”
“Can you stay until the next visitation so Zay can say . . . bye? Just in case.”
“Of course, I don’t like the thought of leaving you right now anyways.” I say and wrap one of my arms around her pulling her closely.
|3 and a Half Hours Later|
“Hey buddy, we are going to go see my mommy and daddy ok?” I say pulling out of the hospital turning around to look at the little boy buckled into the back seat.
“AZ, can we go to my house first? I want Buster and a lunchable.”
“Of course little man, we can’t be without Buster can we?” I say referring to the child’s favorite stuffed animal. He hated to have it because he got teased at school with it last year, but when he gets scared or worried he doesn’t care who sees him with it. Buster is his protection.
We pull up to his house and he waits on me before running to the door.
“Ok, go upstairs to your room and get Buster. I’ll get you a luchable. Do you want to eat it here or on the go?”
“Have you ate yet?”
“Nope.” I say looking down at the little boy, whose big brown eyes melt my heart every time I look at them.
“Ok” he says thinking. “Can we eat here?”
“Sure thing” I say rubbing his hair and unlocking the door. He takes off up the stairs to his room and I walk to the kitchen. I pull out my cell phone and call my mom letting her know Zay and I will be there when we are done eating. I look up in the freezer and find a small microwavable pizza for me. I fix the pizza and call for Zay. When I get no response I call again. He still doesn’t answer me. I run up the stairs and look for him. I open the door to his room, but I don’t see him anywhere.
I start yelling his name. I check all the rooms upstairs and look to see if any of the windows are open. I go downstairs and go to his mom’s room, but he isn’t in there either. I start to panic. I recheck all of the rooms downstairs and run up the stairs to check again. I go back and his room and look under the bed. I don’t know what to do. Finally I pull back the sliding door on his closet and look down. Nothing but shoes and toys were on the ground. I pull back his clothes and in the far back corner curled up in a ball was Zay, crying his eyes out.
“Zay baby” I say pulling him out of the closet and picking him up. “Come here . . . come here . . . shhh . . . talk to me baby . . . what is it?”
“Mommy . . . I’m not going to get to see mommy anymore.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I just know it AZ . . . What am I going to do? Who am I going to live with? Am I just going to get thrown away?” He asks looking at me with tears still filling his eyes.
“Awe, no Zay.” I can’t help but to giggle at that last bit. “No one is going to throw you away. We love you. You will stay with your sister and me. I won’t let anything happen to you ok? I got you baby boy, I got you.” I say as I hold him tightly to me. He finishes crying and looks up at me with sleepy boy eyes.
“You sure you don’t want to just take the lunchable with us? You can take a name in my room when we get there, how about that?” He nods his head and I hold him on my hip. I grab Buster and carry him down the stairs. I grab one of his lunchables, put my pizza in the refrigerator, and head out the door. By the time I make it to the car Zay had already fallen asleep on my shoulder. It’s a good thing he is small for his age or I wouldn’t be able to do this well. I put him into the seat, strap him in, and head to my parents house.
When we arrive my mom opens the door for me and I head straight to my room to lie him down in the bed. I put Buster beside him and cover him with one of my throw blankets. I place a kiss on his forehead and head downstairs. I look at the couch where my parents are sitting cuddled up. As soon as their eyes meet mine they separate a bit and motion for me to sit in between them. I happily oblige just wanting someone to hold me. I didn’t have to be the strong one with my parents; they would be that for me.
“Ok, tell us what is going on.” My mom says as I lay my head on her shoulder. I begin to explain to them everything that is going on and how really all I’m doing is waiting on that phone call from Lita telling me that she is coming to the house because it was over. My parents sit and hold me for a while letting me cry to them.
“What are you going to do?” My dad asks breaking the silence that had formed.
“I don’t know what to do. I love Lita and I am going to be here for her because she is my girlfriend and that is what I want to do. I want to be there for her and help her in any way possible. I want to be the one that is by her side through it all. I love Zay to death; that kid is amazing, but I’m just a kid myself. What if I don’t have enough money to take care of all of us? I mean we do live together.”
“Calm down baby girl.” My dad says squeezing my hand. “Can you see yourself spending the rest of your life with Lita?”
“Yeah, I think I can.” I admit.
“Do you want her and that beautiful little boy up there to be a part of your family?”
“Yes.”
“Then it is simple, do what you can. Stay focused on school and softball. Work, but don’t over work because you are worried about bills. If this is what you want to do, your mother and I will be behind you every step of the way, financially and otherwise. This is a huge responsibility Arizona and I don’t want you to take it lightly. You have the wellbeing of a child in your hands. That is the most precious gift in the world. Make sure that you do what you can to instill values into that little boy the way his mother would want him to be raised. Always be there for him because this that he is about to go through is going to be rough.”
“Yes sir” I say closing my eyes and trying not to worry. “Thank you.” I say and both of my parents lean in to kiss each side of my head. I smile a genuine smile and thank God that I have my family as my support.
I feel my phone vibrate it’s a text. I unlock my phone and read the screen. One new message from Calliope =) >View now or >View later. I immediately press view now.
‘Hey I haven’t really gotten to talk to u this week. Is everything ok? I miss u. Hope 2 hear from u soon. -Callie&Adry’
‘Can I call u I need u’ I quickly reply. I feel my phone vibrate before I even get a chance to sit it down.
‘Always -Callie&Adry’
I stand up and walk outside sitting on the porch. I dial Callie’s number quickly. I need her opinion. I talk to her for two hours and she pretty much said the same thing as my dad. She was really supportive and said she would be here for me anytime. I love having her to fall back on. I miss being around her because she can always make me feel better. It is the fact I know she is there and she means it, and that I know I can be vulnerable with her that makes me love her so much.
The next morning, lying in Lita’s bed with Zay curled up against my back, I get the dreaded phone call from my girlfriend. The next week was completely hell dealing with funeral arrangements and the house, and moving her and Zay in completely. Then the next months that followed were hard. Lita sank into a depression and couldn’t do anything she started suffering in school and on the softball field. All she wanted to do was be with Zay and I couldn’t blame her. She now had a fear of losing him. She would go to work, but only when I would be home with him. Since she was good friends with the management she was lucky enough to be able to keep her job because he understood, she switched to the night shift so it was more likely for me to be home with Zay.
Six months later and she is finally getting better and mostly back to normal. Everything has been stressful, but I’m dealing. Lately I have been getting by with help from Calliope to be honest. We skype every other night when Lita is at work and Zay is in bed because it is the only time I really have free. She helps me deal with everything and we joke. She helps me lighten my mood. Every once in a while we do get a little flirty, but that’s it. It’s just a slight flirt. We don’t cross the line, and if we do we back ourselves up and stop quickly. We try not to talk about the past, but it slips. We still love each other, but we don’t let the discussion get to deep because it hurts too badly.
I’m on Skype with Callie and I hear a car door shut outside.
“Hey, hold on a minute I hear someone outside.” I say sitting my laptop on the table by the bed. I go and look out the apartment window and see that it’s Lita. “Hey Callie, Lita is home.” I say.
“Did she not have to work tonight?” She asks.
“Yeah, she did. I don’t know what’s going on. I’ll talk to you later ok?”
“Ok Good Night Arizona.” She says and blows me a kiss. I do the same and end the call. Within a minute Lita is unlocking the front door. I walk out into the living room. “Hey babe, what are you doing home?”
“Boss sent me home because I’m sick.” She says. “Wait, what are you doing up at 3:30 am.”
“Nothing, I couldn’t sleep and I was on the computer.” I say walking behind her into the bedroom. I lay on the bed and she changes into her pjs.
“You were on the computer?” She asks looking over to where it was sitting on the table.
“Yeah, why?”
“You are still signed in on skype.” She deadpans.
“I’m always signed into Skype when I get on.” I say looking at her confused.
“You were talking to Callie again weren’t you?” She asks and thankfully my back was to her because my eyes got huge. She knows I talk to Callie every once in a while, but not as much as I do. I really don’t think it’s that big of a deal, so I decide to just tell her.
“Yeah, I was talking to her.” I say sitting down on the bed.
She lies down on the bed and gets comfortable. I turn and shut the computer off and start to cuddle with her. As soon as I put my arm around her she moves to tell me she doesn’t want it there. I try to turn her toward me with my arm, but she shakes me off.
“Lita” I say and she tried to ignore me. “Lita, look at me.”
“What Arizona?” She says harshly.
“What is wrong with you?” I say sitting up in bed bending my knee to rest my arm on it.
“I’m sick Arizona, we have been through this.”
“No, it is not the fact that you are sick.” I huff resting my hand in my hand frustrated.
“You know what?” She sits up.
“What?” I ask calmly.
“You are right. I’m tired of this Arizona.”
“Tired of what Lita?” I say letting my frustration show this time.
“Tired of you and her. You think I don’t know that you talk as much as you do? No, I see that you never sign out of Skype. Skype is on my phone, so I know when you sign out and go to bed. You know physically cheating isn’t the only way to cheat Arizona and I’m tired of it happening and me letting it go.”
“Lita, what the hell are you talking about?”
“You and Callie, you are cheating on me. You run to her with everything. Hell you might as well be in a relationship with her. You talk to her all the time.”
“Lita, that is not fair and you know it. She is my best . . .”
“Yeah, yeah, best friend I know, but I can’t do this anymore. Arizona you have to pick: Me or Callie.”
“Lita, do not make me do that.” I yell.
“I don’t want to make you do that, but I have to. I told you I’m tired of it. I love you and I don’t want you here if your heart isn’t in it.”
“Lita, you and Zay are my life. I love the little family we have even if it’s stressful, at times, or not ideal. I don’t want to lose you, or him, but I don’t want to lose my friends either.”
“I’m not asking you to get rid of your friends, but the thing you have with Callie isn’t the same. I’m not asking you to cut her out of your life for good, but damn. Hell, you love her more than you love me. I’m not trying to play second to another bitch.”
“Fine, ok, I won’t talk to her as much. Can we just drop it?” I’m on fire now. She just called Callie out of her name and all I want to do is cuss, fight, and scream, but I know that isn’t what I need to do. I know I will say something I might regret if I keep on. At the moment all I want to do is tell her to get the hell out of my apartment, but I won’t do that to Zay and I don’t want to lose her for good. So, I decide to just go with it for a while, maybe Callie will understand and forgive me. It kills me how Callie is the one that has kept Lita and me together for this long. As bad as my temper is I have wanted out so many times when we were fighting, but Callie calmed me down and made me realize. It’s funny how the person that has helped out so much is the one person she wants to force out of my life.