Broadway Geeks
Title: Broadway Geeks
Fandom: Glee
Written: July, 2010
Rating: PG-13
Words: 10100
Summary: Kurt and Rachel are both on vacation in New York City at the same time. Their respective sets of parents aren't too keen on seeing a bunch of musicals, so the duo sets off together and end up spending two weeks together.
------
Kurt is completely furious with Finn.
The two of them had been talking for ages - well, okay, a day - about trying to convince their parents to take them on vacation. They had agreed that their chances were infinitely better if they picked somewhere the entire family could enjoy and if they both suggested it at the same time. Planned dinner conversations were always best.
He had all but written out a script for them that explained just why a trip to Disneyword is a complete necessity for two sixteen year olds, but Carole spoke up before either of them had so much as touched their mashed potatoes.
"Finn, the brochure for football camp came in the mail today. I'm assuming you and Noah are still planning on going again this year?"
"Oh yeah, I forgot all about that!" Finn's face had lit up like a little kid who just got a puppy. "Yeah, I'll have to call him up later and see if his mom's still cool with it."
"Great," Carole grinned. "Burt and I were planning on making those two weeks the official Hudson-Hummel vacation weeks, so you won't mind if the three of us go somewhere while you're gone? Money's going to be a bit tight, what with the wedding coming up."
Kurt had glared at the ring on Carole's finger as if it had personally offended him.
And that was how he got stuck going on vacation with his father and almost-step-mother, which would have been fine if the two of them weren't so sickeningly adorable.
And that is why he's furious with Finn.
"It's just so unfair," he whines, lying across Mercedes' bed while she and Quinn occupy the two beanbags. "We had everything all planned out! I even memorized how much everything would cost. Individually!"
"Kurt, calm down," Mercedes reaches out to take his hand. "So Finn's going to football camp. Big deal. There's no way football camp will cost as much as Disney."
"It doesn't," Quinn adds, speaking to the ceiling. "This football camp is sponsored by the same organization that put together a cheer camp I used to go to. It's actually pretty cheap."
"Your point being?" Kurt asks impatiently, a bite in his voice.
"Meaning that now there's more money for whatever you and your dad and Mrs. Hudson are going to do!"
Kurt looks up, seeing Mercedes' beaming face and raises his eyebrow.
"Yeah, so?"
"So the three of you are probably going somewhere crazy expensive and way classier than Lima," she decides.
"Where are you going?" Quinn asks, still speaking to the ceiling.
"I don't know," Kurt flops his head back down onto the bed. "They haven't decided yet."
"So why are you complaining?" Mercedes starts laughing. "Kurt, hon, you should be attacking your computer right now figuring out vacation ideas. And yeah, your dad's going to be there too, but now you don't have to worry about it being somewhere Finn would like!"
"You should go to Iowa," Quinn tells the ceiling.
"What? Why?"
"If you meet a boy you'll be able to marry him." She says this so matter-of-factly that Kurt can't help but laugh.
"I'm serious!" Quinn looks away from the ceiling and over at the pair of them. "With so few states legalizing gay marriage, the ones that have legalized it must have a higher number of gays living there. It's common sense!"
"So basically, you want me to go to Iowa so I can tell you all about hot boys?"
"Yep!"
------
He ends up not suggesting Iowa.
In fact, he doesn't suggest anywhere. He wants to see what his dad and Carole have in mind for the three of them. He knows from experience just how hard it is to find a daytrip he and his dad will both enjoy, but maybe having Carole there too will help.
And he's certainly not complaining when Carole brings up New York City.
He's denying that the squeal that reverberated around the kitchen had come out of his mouth, though.
"It's a two-week vacation," Burt spreads out a couple papers in front of the three of them, "so I'm thinking we could spread out and do different things in different parts of the city, which might mean changing hotels halfway through. It's a huge place up there."
Kurt bites his tongue and doesn't mention the subway.
"We can go to Ellis Island and see the Statue of Liberty and visit ground zero and there's bound to be a Mets game going on while we're there."
Kurt bites his tongue again and doesn't mention how much he truly abhors stirrup pants.
"And I know the city's famous for its nightlife, but I don't want to stay out too late. Besides, we'll be doing so much during the day we'll be tired out by the time it gets dark!"
Kurt is sure he tastes blood, but he doesn't mention the fact that musicals start at eight.
Burt's pulled out a map now, and is pointing out places he has circled and highlighted. From the looks of it, he's already planned out the entire trip. Kurt immediately finds the Theatre District and his face falls when he realizes there are no little dots or circles there.
"So, what do you think, Kurt?"
"Huh?" Kurt blinks and realizes that his father is pointing at the map, obviously wanting his opinion. He looks closer, noticing that his dad's finger is pointing at the intersection of 51st and Broadway. A familiar logo catches his eye on one of the papers Burt's printed out, and Kurt launches himself at his father, hugging him tightly.
Because his dad's pointing to the location of the Gershwin Theatre, where Wicked is playing.
"Didn't think I'd forget about the Great White Way, did you?" Burt chuckles. "I thought we'd hit the theatre on our first day and start things off with a bang."
------
On the plane ride into the city, Kurt thinks that seeing Wicked would be enough to make the rest of his dad's scheduled two-week visit to New York City bearable. He's not looking forward to seeing every tourist attraction, he's not looking forward to being one of "those people" that stops in the middle of Times Square for a picture, and he's certainly not looking forward to getting up at 5 AM to go stand in line for the Empire State Building.
But he's seeing Wicked three hours after they arrive in the city, so he thinks he can manage.
They're staying at the Marriott Hotel on the 27th floor, which is super exciting. There's a theatre inside the building, too, which Kurt thinks is the coolest thing to ever be inside a hotel, and he's already plotting to sneak off to it and see the show if they really do stick to Burt's schedule and come back in for the night at seven on Tuesday. The elevators are really fun to ride, and their room is big and classy and Burt says that he can keep the souvenir bathrobe.
He had managed to talk his dad into packing a nice pair of slacks and a button-down shirt for the musical, and Carole had asked for his opinion on her dress before packing. The three of them set off for the theatre looking extremely good, he has to admit, and he strutted in front of the pair of them for most of the way.
The theatre is huge and wonderful and beautiful and everything he expected it to be. He stands and admires the mural of the map of Oz for a full minute before Burt pulls him along up the escalators, telling him that an usher was glaring at him for obstructing theatre traffic. They have really good seats, too, and Kurt wonders how his father managed to pull that off. But he's not complaining when the usher shows them into the third row of the mezzanine and he's handed his Playbill.
He buries his face in the Playbill, eyes devouring every inch of it. He holds it with the tips of his fingers, afraid to crinkle it or get fingerprints on it. He scans the cast members' bios and stares at all the headshots for a good three minutes, trying to memorize faces. There is no understudy notice, which means he'll be seeing the three headlined actors in their roles. He's heard incredible things about the two leading ladies.
At two o'clock, the announcement to turn off all cell phones comes. Kurt shuts his off instantly, not wanting to be "that person" that doesn't and then gets a text in the middle of the show. He straightens in his seat, setting the Playbill carefully in his lap and folding his hands expectantly.
By the time intermission rolls around, he is certain of one thing. Antoinette Perry forgive him, but Mandy Gonzalez and Katie Rose Clarke live sound so much better than Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth sounded on the recording. He makes a mental note to look at both their bios again later, then look up everything they've done in the past once he has access to a computer.
Then he looks over at his father and Carole, and his face falls.
"Dad!" He manages not to full-out slap his father, but just barely. Because his father, whose existence he will now be denying, has fallen asleep in a Broadway theatre in the middle of a show.
"Whasgoinon?" Burt mumbles, sitting up straighter. "Is it over?"
"No, Dad, it's intermission. How could you fall asleep during this show?"
"Sorry Kurt," Burt's does look sorry, if Kurt's being honest. "I'm always tired on travel days. And these chairs are really comfy." Kurt makes an exasperated noise and looks over to Carole for help, but the woman is missing.
"She probably went to the bathroom," Burt decides when Kurt wonders aloud where she could have gone. "Don't most women do that?"
"Yeah, they do," Kurt crosses his arms, still upset with his father for sleeping. "Do I even want to ask what part you conked out during?"
"I think it was during that green girl's solo."
"She's had quite a few of those, Dad."
"Oh. Really?"
"You fell asleep back during The Wizard and I?"
"Yes?"
"There's no way I'm related to you." Kurt turns away from his father, arms still crossed. He tugs out his phone, turning it on and deciding to tell the internet what terrible theatre etiquette his father has.
Intermission at Wicked! Mandy and Katie are complete goddesses! (Dad fell asleep.)
He makes this his facebook status, turning his phone back off as Carole returns.
"Are musicals always this loud?" she asks as she sits back down.
"What do you mean?" Kurt is confused.
"I'm starting to get a headache," Carole's voice sounds apologetic. "I don't think I got enough sleep last night, and now all the sounds are making my head hurt."
"Want me to find you some earplugs?" Burt offers.
"Dad," Kurt's smacks himself in the forehead. "They don't sell earplugs at musicals. The whole point of going to a musical is to listen to the music!" He looks over at Carole adding, "Sorry. Are you okay?"
"I just took something for it," she nods, "so I'll probably be fine. The musical is very good. The main actresses certainly are talented."
Kurt bites his tongue and doesn't go into a long-winded speech about how he now worships the pair of them.
The rest of the musical is just as wonderful as the first act. Kurt is sitting on the edge of his seat for most of it, because he's read the novel Wicked and he knows what's going to happen at the end. When the musical throws the novel's ending out the window, Kurt actually cries tears of joy.
He gives the entire cast a standing ovation, getting up out of his seat as soon as the curtain begins to rise for the bows. His father and Carole are clapping politely, but Kurt can tell that Carole still has a headache. He feels a little bit guilty when he gives a cheer when Mandy Gonzalez comes out for her bow, knowing that it probably went straight to Carole's temples.
They leave the theatre and Kurt is buzzing with excitement. He wants to geek out over the show with someone, so he smiles around at the other patrons hopefully, wondering if anyone would stop him and ask him what he thought.
It doesn't work, and before he knows it, his father has guided both him and Carole into some knock-off Italian restaurant, mumbling something about food being good when you have a headache. Despite it being dinnertime, they're seated quickly and are soon sipping glasses of water and perusing the menu that offers over-priced dishes with stupid names.
Kurt pulls out his phone, turning it back on and logging onto facebook again. A little red flag pops up, telling him that someone commented on his status. He figures it's Mercedes or Quinn - or maybe even Finn - asking how his trip is going or something.
Instead, he gets this:
OMG you're in the city too? I saw Wicked last week! Loved it! How long are you here till?
It's from Rachel. Kurt blinks at his phone, not knowing whether to feel worried that she'll hunt him down and make him sing with her in the middle of Times Square or happy that he's found someone to geek over musical theatre with. But then again, it's Rachel, and he's not about to call her up just to hear her talk about how superior she is to everyone who's ever played Elphaba.
He decides that a short reply will do, so he types, Here for two weeks. We should talk about Wicked when we're back home. It's not mean and it's not an invitation to come join him, so he thinks that should do the job.
He barely sets his phone down when another little red flag pops up. It's another message from Rachel.
Want to go see it again? I'm here for the rest of the month!
Now he's not sure whether to be scared of Rachel hunting him down and dragging him back to a theatre and having to listen to her hushed critiques all through the show or just curious as to how Rachel can possibly afford to be in the city for a whole month.
But their waiter arrives to take their orders, so Kurt sets his phone down and decides he'll figure this all out after he has his dinner. He orders a salad that has enough ingredients to warrant a fancy name, but not the price that comes with it, nodding hopefully when the waiter asks them if they'd like a basket of breadsticks with their order. He wants to know if the breadsticks here are better than the ones back at home (and he's certain that they are).
"Did you like the show, Kurt?" his dad asks as the waiter takes their menus and heads back towards the kitchen. Kurt's entire face lights up.
"Absolutely!" he nods. "It was better than I expected! Mandy and Katie are both stunningly gorgeous and they have the most incredible stage presence. Andy and Mandy had wonderful chemistry, too!"
"Who?" Burt asks blankly.
"The green girl, the ditzy blonde, and the love interest," Kurt says, and Burt makes an "Ohhh," noise and nods.
Kurt doesn't want to press his luck so early in the trip, but he figures he might as well ask anyway, so he says hopefully, "What are we doing tonight?"
"Just sightseeing," Burt smiles. "We should head back early so Carole can get her rest."
"Thanks, Burt," Carole smiles at him, laying a hand on his arm. "I think my headache's almost gone, but it would be good to call it an early evening. Sorry, Kurt. You must be disappointed."
"Actually, I was thinking," Kurt straightens in his seat, "since we'll be going back early and there's a theatre in our hotel, do you think I could see the show that's playing there?"
"By yourself?" Burt's brow wrinkles.
"Well, it's in the same building," Kurt points out. "It's not like I'd be wandering around the city at night all alone or anything."
"He has a point," Carole says fairly. "And it would be nice for Kurt to see another show."
Burt isn't going for it, Kurt can tell. He tries not to frown, but he knows his dad is being unreasonable. He'd be inside the building and probably in a crowd full of other tourists doing exactly the same thing: taking advantage of the hotel and the theatre being the same building.
"Please?" Kurt tries not to over-do it with puppy dog eyes, but he can tell he's failing.
"I don't know," Burt seems torn, but that means he'll probably give in sooner or later. "I don't really want you going off by yourself, even if it is in the same building."
"I'll get someone to go with me," Kurt offers, completely forgetting that he doesn't know anyone in the city and can't pull someone out of thin air like he can back home. Burt chuckles.
"Oh really? Who do you know in New York City?" He seems amused, so that's a good sign.
"Rachel!"
Oh fuck.
He hadn't meant to say that. It had come out before he could stop himself, really. He felt his cheeks heat up, Carole and Burt's confused expressions doing nothing to help. He stammers out, "I-I mean, never mind."
"Rachel as in Finn's girlfriend Rachel?" Carole asks, lips turning up into a smile. "Why doesn't it surprise me that she's here?"
"Oh, that Rachel!" Burt catches on. "Yeah, I like this idea. That girl knows how to handle herself. Sure, call her up and see if she'd like to join you. Is she here with her parents?"
"Probably," Kurt shrugs.
"Great," Burt is nodding again. "Yeah, give them a call and see if she and her dads would want to join you." The way he says 'dads' without even second-guessing it really goes to show just how open-minded he's become over the course of a year.
"Right now?" Kurt asks, picking up his phone.
"Yeah, just step outside and stand by the window where I can see you."
Kurt rolls his eyes, but he heads out the door anyway, giving Carole and Burt a small wave through the glass, cheeks turning pink when they wave back. He looks up Rachel's number on his phone, pressing 'call' and half-hoping she wouldn't answer.
She picks up after the first ring.
"Kurt, thank God!" she's practically shouting into her phone. "I was about three seconds away from calling you!"
"Hi, Rachel," Kurt can't keep the skepticism out of his voice or off his face. "How's it going?"
"Oh, you know," he can practically feel her posture straightening. "New York City is New York City. A place where people like you and me can be ourselves without having to worry about lesser minds criticizing us for it. It's wonderful, of course."
"Then why were you three seconds away from calling me?" Kurt can't help but ask.
"Oh, well," Rachel certainly sounds less enthusiastic now, "I've been in the city for a week already, and I love my dads, I really do, but they always want to do the same thing every time we come here."
"You come often, then?"
"Every summer since I was six!" Rachel sounds proud. "My dads have a friend who lives here, and he rents out his place during the summer and holiday seasons. He always blocks out July for us."
"That's fantastic," Kurt can't keep the jealousy out of his voice. "So all this must be old news for you."
"On the contrary, I always find the city to be an exciting place just waiting to be explored. On the rare occasion when my dads deviate from their normal routine, it's quite lovely."
"Your dads like to schedule things too, huh?" Kurt looks through the window at his father. "Mine's got this whole trip planned down to the millisecond."
"And let me guess, it's incredibly irksome because you want to do your own thing and explore and not be a stereotypical tourist who blocks traffic in Times Square and makes all the locals roll their eyes."
"I don't really want to do the Empire State Building either, but yeah."
"Story of my life," Rachel groans. "So, are you calling me in hopes that I'll be your savior?"
"Something along those lines," Kurt admits, knowing it's best to just tell the truth. "Would you, maybe, want to go see musicals with me? It's just that it's not by dad's thing and Carole got a headache during Wicked so I don't think she'll be running back to the next theatre or anything."
"Thank God you asked!" Rachel sighs heavily. "All my dads want to do is see La Cage Aux Folles over and over, and there's only so much glitter this Berry can take." A pause, then, "No offense."
"None taken," Kurt laughs. "To be honest, La Cage isn't exactly on the top of my list."
"Good."
"So do you think your dads will go for it? You seeing musicals with me, I mean. And technically when I say 'musicals' I mean 'the musical playing in the Marriott Hotel.' My dad's so protective that he won't even let me wander around the building without a buddy."
"I'd love to see Come Fly Away!" So Rachel apparently knows where all the musicals were playing. That shouldn't surprise him. "Are you going tonight?"
"I was hoping to, yeah."
"Great. I'll meet you at the box office at seven o'clock. We can work on convincing our respective parents that seeing shows every other night is a complete necessity after tonight's success. Plan?"
"Um, plan," Kurt agrees. He's almost certain that his dad won't go for it, but hey, he's not going to shoot the idea down just yet. "See you tonight."
"See you," Rachel echoes, and hangs up.
------
The following morning, Kurt wakes up and smiles at the signed Come Fly Away Playbill on his bedside table.
Rachel had met him outside the box office as promised and had asked the man at the window for discounted student tickets. By some miracle, they were still available, so the pair of them only paid a fraction of the normal price and ended up with pretty good seats, too. Rachel hadn't made any remarks during the show and had clapped politely during the curtain call. She had wonderful theatre etiquette, and it made Kurt wonder why he had been so worried in the first place.
She had then dragged him out of the theatre as fast as humanly possible, pulling him along impatiently until they'd reached an unmarked door surrounded by metal barriers. Kurt was confused as to what they were doing until he noticed the crowd congregating and how they were all holding out Playbills and posters.
"It's called stagedooring," Rachel had informed him. "If you're lucky, the stars will come out and sign Playbills and whatever else you shove in their faces. It's also a chance to have a quick chat with them if they're not in a hurry."
"You sound experienced," Kurt had remarked, and Rachel had laughed, telling him, "I stagedoored Next to Normal before Alice Ripley had to say no to pictures. Nowadays, that's ancient history. So yes, you could say I'm experienced."
The cast had trickled out slowly, and Kurt was amazed at Rachel's ability to recognize all of them. She mentioned little things each had done during the performance, telling them how much she had enjoyed the show and thanking them for their time. In true Rachel Berry fashion, she had done it all without resorting to adjectives such as "awesome" or "amazing."
She had told him that they were going to see Wicked again and that he was going to meet Mandy Gonzalez and Katie Rose Clarke. It took him about ten seconds to remember how to breathe.
So Kurt is in a very good mood this morning. Rachel had come back to their room after the show so he could prove to Burt that yes, she really does exist here in the flesh, and she had somehow talked him into letting Kurt ditch his schedule and see musicals with her every day for the next two weeks.
Back in Lima, this is called "Rachel Berry overload." In New York City, it's called "Rachel Berry just saved my life and my sanity."
He's still getting used to that aspect of their relationship.
He meets her down in the Starbucks that adjoins the Marriott and they order smoothies and drink them sitting outside the small store, watching countless taxis and pedestrians go by.
"So you've really been coming here since you were six?" Kurt asks, stirring his smoothie to break up the ice.
"Yes," Rachel beams. "Although I've never been here the same time as one of my friends. It makes for a nice change, doing something with someone other than my dads." She looks guilty for a second, then explains. "It's not that I don't love coming here with them, it's just that they still treat me like a little girl. I mean, they let me see more grown-up shows now, but I think sometimes they forget that I'm old enough to make up my own mind about things."
"I get what you're saying," Kurt grimaces.
"They don't understand how I can practically hero-worship Mandy Gonzalez and not consider Douglas Hodge just as praise-worthy," Rachel tells her smoothie, a cross expression on her face. "I'll admit that he did a fantastic job in his role, but there's just something magical about Mandy. It was the same with every other Elphaba I've ever seen. I think it's because I connect so strongly with the role."
"I understand completely," Kurt nods. "There's just something so empowering about watching a woman onstage baring her soul while singing Defying Gravity. Even though it's not you up there, it still feels like you're the one flying."
"Exactly!" Rachel agrees. "Especially when she hits the end note and you just know that this woman knows what she wants and she's out to get it and nobody is going to stop her."
"Right," Kurt's face darkens the tiniest bit, remembering his own fiasco with that high note. Rachel picks up on it.
"I never asked," she looks him in the eye. "Can you really hit a high F or was that just talk?"
"I can hit it," he says confidently, sipping his smoothie and hoping she'll do the same and not press the matter.
"Then why didn't you?"
Yep, still Rachel Berry. Even in New York, she still asks stupid questions.
"It's a long story."
"We have two and a half hours until we have to be somewhere," she tells him, checking her watch.
"Wait, where do we have to be in two and a half hours?" Kurt asks, confused. Last he checked, Sunday matinees started at three o'clock, not twelve thirty.
"We're lotto-ing Wicked," Rachel informs him, nodding and taking a sip of her smoothie, which wordlessly tells him that she thought it had been obvious.
"Lotto?" Kurt is still confused.
"It's this thing some shows do two and a half hours or two hours before the show starts," Rachel's posture straightens. "You put your name in a bucket and they draw names and the winners get to buy cheap tickets! Normally they're front row seats, too. Wicked's lotto is always pretty full, though, so we should probably have a backup when we lose. I heard you can get Chicago rush pretty much any time, so we could go there."
Any doubt in Kurt's mind of Rachel Berry's all-knowingness when it comes to Broadway is wiped away. This girl clearly knows everything there is to know.
She also is incapable of being distracted from something, because she crosses her legs, raises an eyebrow at him, and says, "So? Story. Go."
------
They lose Wicked lotto, as Rachel predicted. There were at least 300 other people there, so neither of them was surprised. They end up seeing Chicago with rush tickets instead, but Kurt's not disappointed. He's seen the movie countless times, but the live show is so much better.
After schmoozing with the cast at the stage door and geeking out over their signed Playbills, Rachel asks, "So, what show would you like to see tonight? We can see Billy Elliot, Fela!, Rock of Ages, In the Heights, Mamma Mia!, or Next to Normal." She pauses, then adds before Kurt can get a word in, "Or we could see Chicago again."
Kurt laughs, saying, "Rachel Berry, I do believe that you are deserving of the title 'Broadway Encyclopedia.' Your fathers would be proud."
"I am the person who told all the unwitting tourists that Rock of Ages is highly inappropriate for children under thirteen," she says proudly. "The man working at the TKTS booth left that part out."
"What do you want to see?" he asks, hoping she doesn't say Mamma Mia! He saw the show when it came through Lima a few years back and hated it.
"Next to Normal," her face is glowing when she says it. "It's my favorite show."
"I thought Wicked was your favorite show," Kurt links arms with her as they start walking back towards Times Square.
"I changed my mind," she grins. "While Wicked is certainly a captivating show that allows the audience to escape into a fantasy land for two and a half hours, Next to Normal shoves the harshness of reality in your face. It makes you really think about your own life and just how fragile the human mind is."
"Sounds terrifying." Kurt admits.
"Oh, it is," Rachel assures him, doing nothing to heighten his desire to see the show. "I've cried all seven times I've seen the show. J. Robert Spencer even recognized me because I had been sobbing in the front row and he gave me a hug at the stage door." Beaming, she adds, "So did Alice Ripley, but that was because I sat outside the theatre for six hours to get rush tickets."
"I think you're insane," Kurt says, as nicely as he can manage.
"I think you know nothing of the word until you've seen Next to Normal," Rachel shoots back.
------
After seeing Next to Normal, Kurt can't decide if he loves Rachel for introducing him to such a masterpiece or if he hates her for making him ride that particular emotional roller coaster. Rachel had handed him a handkerchief before the show started, saying, "You'll need it," and he certainly had.
He's almost certain that he cried for about 40% of the show, spent about 45% of the show shaking in his seat, and the remaining 15% was for stunned silence. It had taken him a full minute to move once intermission had started.
Kurt's also pretty sure that he now has a gigantic crush on Adam Chanler-Berat. When the man comes out of the stagedoor, Kurt literally can't speak. Rachel prods him in the side and holds up her camera, saying that he needs to get a picture with the performer, which makes Kurt's face turn red. When his ability to speak is returned and he manages to have a semi-normal five second conversation with Adam, and get a nice picture with him, Kurt decides that the trip could end right there and he would be completely content.
He and Rachel link arms as they leave the theatre, chatting away at how much they loved the show. When Rachel starts teasing him about his completely obvious crush on Adam, Kurt just laughs and asks her who her Broadway crush is.
"I know you have one," he tells her. "You may be dating Finn, but I just know you still have one." Rachel turns pink.
"It's kind of embarrassing," she admits, speaking quietly and ducking her head so her hair brushes past her face. She mumbles something, but Kurt doesn't catch it. He leads them into the Marriott, saying, "You're going to have to speak up."
"Wesley Taylor." Her cheeks are bright red and she's still looking at the ground.
"Who's that?" he asks.
"He's in the Addams Family," Rachel tells him, looking up from the ground. "He's extremely talented and good-looking and I'm sure his boyfriend would agree."
"Oh," Kurt hadn't expected that. "So that's why it's embarrassing."
"Don't tell anyone," Rachel pleads, tugging on his arm. "It was bad enough when I confessed my undying love for Jonathan Groff on the Guilty Ones and informed the internet that I would marry him one day."
"I have no idea what that means," Kurt says solemnly, "but I won't tell anyone."
"Thank you." Rachel's cheeks are still pink.
"Come on," Kurt leads her over to the elevators. "Pit stop in my room before you call your dads to come get you."
"Okay," Rachel agrees. She smiles, but that soon turns into a smirk when she says, "We can talk about all the hot Broadway boys some more."
------
They see American Idiot on Monday after spending the entire day walking around the Theatre District and taking stupid pictures outside all the theatres. Kurt's favorite is the one of Rachel posing like the girls from Chicago and Rachel's favorite is the one of Kurt pretending to kiss the giant picture of Adam's face outside the Booth.
On Tuesday they see Addams Family and Kurt spends a full two hours talking Rachel into buying a ring pop at Walgreens and using it to propose to Wesley Taylor. She agrees, but only if he does the same with Adam Chanler-Berat when they see Next to Normal again.
She chickens out at the last second and instead babbles something about liking the harmonies in one of his songs. Kurt steals the ring pop and does it for her, getting loud applause from the other theatre patrons and a very gracious refusal from Wesley.
(Both he and Rachel are almost positive that the man who had doubled over laughing at the end of the queue had been Wesley's boyfriend.)
On Wednesday they see Promises, Promises. Both of them act like complete fangirls when Kristin Chenoweth comes out of the stagedoor, cheering for her and proclaiming their undying love. Kurt finds it hard to breathe again. They meet Sean Hayes, too, who surprisingly received a less enthusiastic response from the fans. Rachel and Kurt take it upon themselves to remedy that, counting to three and yelling, "We love you, Sean!" once the cheers died down. He winks at them and Kurt can't breathe… again.
They eat dinner at Ellen's Stardust Diner, dancing in their seats to the music and clapping loudly whenever someone finished a song. They both agree that their favorite waiter was the one who sang Jonas Brothers and then the song "I'm Alive" from Next to Normal. Rachel makes a point of telling him just how much she had enjoyed his rendition when he passed their table.
Hearing "I'm Alive" at the diner makes both of them want to see Next to Normal again, but Rachel informs him that the show is dark on Wednesdays, so they pick In the Heights instead.
"I am completely against stunt casting in all cases," Rachel starts on a tirade, eyes flashing as they head towards the theatre, "and I highly disapprove of their choice to hire an ex-Disney actor to take over the lead role."
"Corbin Bleu?" Kurt's voice is disbelieving when he catches sight of a picture of the High School Musical star.
"Yes," Rachel is breathing heavily. "Not only is High School Musical a complete atrocity that deserves to be collectively erased from the memories of every human being on the planet, but it promoted the careers of talentless individuals, forcing them upon the Broadway community. I can at least be thankful that some of their fans will learn what true musical theatre is as a result."
"So you're basically saying that it's your guilty pleasure movie and you're furious that they didn't cast you?"
Rachel heaves an impressive sigh. "You know me too well."
They break out the ring pop again and this time Rachel's brave enough to get down on one knee. Corbin laughs and calls her "sweetie" and gives her a one-armed hug from behind the barrier before telling her that he's very sorry, but he has to turn her down.
They can feel the collective glares of every teenage girl within the vicinity as they leave the theatre.
------
Having spent four full days together, both Rachel and Kurt feel obligated to spend time with their families on Thursday. They plan to meet up later outside the Booth and see Next to Normal again in the evening.
The Mets game is at its fourth inning when Kurt's phone buzzes. He pulls it out of his pocket eagerly, grinning when he recognizes Rachel's number.
I'm bored out of my brain.
He laughs and texts her back.
Me too. Stirrup pants are awful.
He and Rachel text back and forth for the remainder of the game, deciding that they'll meet up early Friday morning and get some hard-core shopping done. Kurt vows that he will give her an ulterior motive-free makeover this time.
Once the game is over, Kurt drags his dad and Carole off to the Stardust Diner in hopes that Rachel and her dads will show up. They don't, but the waiter who sang "I'm Alive" is working and Kurt 'accidentally' bumps into him on his way to the bathroom, asking him as nonchalantly as possible if he could please sing a song from Next to Normal?
Burt and Carole ask him multiple times throughout the song why he's smirking, but he shushes them both, face flushing when the waiter comes right up to their table and sings in his face. Even though the song is totally not meant to be taken that way, Kurt finds it kind of hot.
(He almost kisses Carole when she tells him she got a picture of it.)
When they leave the restaurant, the waiter bumps into him, grinning and asking how he'd liked the song. Kurt blushes and tells him he sounded fantastic, and the waiter bends in close and whispers in his ear to look out for the casting notice for the Next to Normal tour.
"Congratulations," Kurt says as he leaves the diner, grinning and texting Rachel the second he steps outside.
When they meet up later in the evening, they both take a moment to squeal over the waiter's news. Rachel wants to make him a big fancy card, but Kurt points out that they don't even know his name. They both laugh and sit on the steps outside the Booth, talking and laughing until the theatre opens to patrons.
Kurt doesn't cry as much this time, but he and Rachel both come to the general consensus that Kyle Dean Massey is the creepiest thing on two legs. In the most positive way possible. They spend all of intermission trying to find a way to word that sentiment and not make it sound like an insult.
They stagedoor again and this time Rachel surprises Kurt by stealing the ring pop and proposing to Adam. There are glares similar to the ones she got when she proposed to Corbin, and Kurt's face turns red. Adam politely says no, and when they leave the theatre Rachel tells Kurt that was payback for asking Wesley.
------
Their shopping trip on Friday ends with them both returning to the Marriott and dumping their bags onto the floor, flopping onto the two beds and looking at each other upside-down.
"That was some serious shopping," Rachel says, smiling but sounding tired.
"You are going to look beautiful in your new dress," Kurt tells her, feeling proud of himself for talking Rachel into buying something flattering and not made of argyle. "You should wear it to the theatre later."
"Where am I supposed to change?" Rachel asks, making Kurt laugh.
"Rachel Berry, for a girl who's so smart, you are missing the obvious. We are in a hotel room and we are the only two people in this hotel room. Nobody is going to barge in."
"But… you're in here."
"Oh, Rachel," he sighs. "There's a bathroom if it's that uncomfortable. But honestly, I'm not Finn. I'm not going to," he finger-quotes the next term, "'arrive early' if you so much as unbutton your blouse."
At first Rachel looks affronted, then a little disgusted. It takes her about a minute to loosen up and start laughing.
Poor Finn, Kurt thinks. If only he knew what Rachel and I are talking about now.
They end up talking about more than just Finn. Rachel tells him all about what it was like growing up with two dads and no mom, and Kurt tells her all about the time he had with his mom when he was younger. She opens up and tells him all about Shelby and how it still hurts that Shelby doesn't want her. Kurt tells her all about how his father and Finn act like BFFs and how much it had hurt at first.
The conversation returns to Finn at that point, and Kurt asks Rachel all about their relationship, unabashedly asking if they'd done the nasty yet. Rachel flushes about sixteen shades of pink and tells him no.
"Finn's a gentleman," she says defensively. "He would never force me to do anything I'm not ready for."
"Rachel, I live with him," Kurt reminds her. "He's gotten into the habit of going all super-big-brother on me any time someone so much as blinks in my direction, so trust me, I get it."
"Do you like being his brother?" Rachel asks, obviously remember the disaster that was Kurt's crush on Finn.
"Yes," Kurt answers firmly. "I'll admit that my feelings for Finn used to be something completely different, but now I can safely say that they are a thing of the past." He smirks, adding, "But that won't stop me from telling him to dump you if I think you're wrong for him."
Rachel splutters and starts on a rant about how she and Finn are "made for each other" before she realizes that Kurt had been kidding.
"Now go change into that dress before I bodily force you out of that blouse," Kurt orders, pointing at the bathroom. Rachel giggles, picking up her shopping bag and disappearing into the bathroom for a few minutes. When she comes out, Kurt can't resist wolf-whistling.
"Shut up," Rachel sounds embarrassed.
"You look great," he assures her, stepping around behind her to fix the tie, making the bow as even as possible. "You'll have no trouble finding a taxi with that on."
Rachel slaps his arm lightly, but she lets him take a picture of her with his phone. He says it's because he needs a caller-ID picture for her, but he's totally lying and he uploads it to facebook instead.
It takes all of five seconds for him to get the notification "Noah Puckerman likes your photo."
When he checks his phone later at dinner, he has eight notifications, all for that picture. All of them are from Finn and Puck, arguing about whether Puck is allowed to find Rachel hot if Finn's dating her. Rachel asks what's so funny when he starts laughing, so he shows it to her. She's mad for about two seconds that he tricked her.
They see West Side Story that night, both crying their eyes out at the end of intermission and then later at the end of the show. Both of them have tear trails all over their faces at the stagedoor, and Rachel gets a hug from Josephina Scaglione when she tells the woman just how beautiful her performance was.
They walk back to the Marriott, arguing all the way over who's better, the Sharks or the Jets. Kurt likes the Sharks because he's always loved Anita and he thought George Akram was the most talented dancer on that stage, but Rachel likes the Jets and Kurt is suspicious it's because she's in love with Tony.
------
On Saturday they do the unthinkable. They skip seeing a matinee.
Instead, Kurt drags Rachel into a hair salon, telling the girl that she is not leaving this building until she has a new haircut. While he admits that her hair is nice, he can't deny that he's wanted to see her with short hair since the sixth grade.
"And straight," he emphasizes. "No waves or curls, just straight. You could totally pull it off."
At first Rachel looks as if she wants to bite his head off (or shave his head, he can't tell). But after he picks up one of the magazines in the waiting room and shows her a plethora of pictures of young actresses and models with short hair, she warms up to the idea.
One of the hairdressers comes over to them and asks if they need help. Kurt points at one of the pictures, asking her if she could make Rachel's hair look like that. The woman touches Rachel's hair gently, spinning a lock between her fingers, then jokes, "And here I thought you two would be hard to please."
Rachel makes Kurt hold her hand when they start cutting. Kurt rolls his eyes and his cheeks turn pink, but he obliges.
"It's just hair," he argues as Rachel's fingers squeeze his together painfully. "It'll grow back."
"I haven't had a haircut since I was thirteen," Rachel admits, squeezing her eyes shut. "I'm terrified that something horrible will happen and then I'll look nothing like my headshot."
"That's what ponytails are for," Kurt says exasperatedly. "Pull your hair back in the headshot; pull your hair back for the audition. Simple. It's not like you're having plastic surgery or something."
Despite Kurt's help, Rachel still keeps her eyes shut the entire time. She finally opens them after her hair has been blow-dried and brushed and the hairdresser told her she had finished.
"It's so soft," Rachel says, taking a step closer to the mirror and running her fingers through her now short locks. "And it has layers."
Kurt winks at the hairdresser. That hadn't been the original plan at all.
"I love it!" Rachel turns around and catches Kurt in a hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for taking me here!"
"What can I say?" Kurt sighs impressively. "I know what looks good on my girls."
Rachel starts crying.
"What's wrong?" Kurt asks.
"No, nothing's wrong," Rachel sniffs. "It's just that you called me one of your girls. Nobody's ever called me one of the girls before."
"Oh, Rachel," Kurt links arms with her while discreetly handing his credit card to the hairdresser with the other hand, "you lovely, bat-shit crazy girl, you. Of course you're one of my girls."
------
Finn calls Kurt on Sunday morning, catching him right as he and Rachel sit down for breakfast.
"Hello absentee brother," Kurt says, grinning at Rachel when she straightens in her seat, knowing who's on the other end.
"Hey Kurt," Finn answers. "I've got a question for you."
"Okay," Kurt is confused. What could possibly be so important that Finn actually made the effort to make a phone call?
"Is Puck allowed to think Rachel's hot if I'm dating her?"
Kurt bursts out laughing, completely taken aback that he and Puck are still on about that. He decides to fuel the fire instead of telling Finn that Puck thinks that everything with breasts is hot and to not worry about it.
"Well, I certainly hope so, because she's sitting across from me right now and I must admit that she is looking quite stunning today. If I weren't a man's man, I'd be all over that. In fact…" And he hangs up.
Rachel's phone rings not five seconds later. She answers it, eyes widening before she finally says, "Finn, calm down and speak slowly. I think I caught two words of that."
When she hangs up, Kurt looks up from his muffin and asks, "So?"
"He called to warn me that you like girls now and that I should keep my rape whistle handy."
"Oh Finn," Kurt shakes his head, pulling out his phone again and texting his brother.
It was a joke. Ha ha.
"So I was thinking we could hit up Off-Broadway today," Rachel says as she sips her coffee. "Avenue Q and the Fantastiks?"
"So we'll basically be going from Sesame Street makes a porno to classic, tasteful musical theatre?"
"Basically."
Later that night, the both confess to having enjoyed Avenue Q more.
------
They finally win Wicked lotto for the Wednesday matinee. He and Rachel both nearly have a spaz attack when Kurt's name is called, and he takes his place in line smiling broadly, striking up a conversation with the person in front of him.
Even though it clashes with his outfit, Kurt decides to wear the button he gets that says, "I won the Wicked lotto!"
When they return to the theatre for the show, they're stopped by an older couple who ask Rachel if she'll take a picture for them. Rachel does, then asks if the couple will take a picture of her and Kurt. The two of them take one picture just standing next to each other and smiling then one posing like Elphaba and Glinda. Kurt decides to be nice and poses as Glinda, since he's already on Rachel's left.
This time Kurt doesn't have to wake someone up during intermission. He and Rachel just turn and gape at each other as soon as the curtain goes down, eyes wide and excitement all over their faces. They run around the theatre, stopping at the souvenir booth and debating whether or not to buy something before realizing that they can get it all cheaper online anyway.
They hold hands during the second act, even though they both know what's coming.
They're still holding hands when they leave the theatre. Rachel pulls Kurt over to the stage door, and they both wait impatiently for the cast to come out. Kurt babbles on about how much he loves Mandy and Katie while Rachel tugs on his arm whenever someone comes out.
Kurt regrets getting rid of the ring pop when the two leading ladies come out.
But he smiles and tells them how much he enjoyed the show and how talented he thinks they are, watching as they sign his Playbill and then posing for a picture with them. He swaps places with Rachel and takes her picture too. They wait until Mandy and Katie have both left before squealing.
They both agree that the only way to top this would be to see Next to Normal again, but since the show's dark on Wednesdays, they decide to go see Phantom of the Opera instead. They've both seen the movie too many times to actually care about the stage show.
"I feel bad admitting it," Kurt whispers to Rachel during intermission, "but it's not really living up to its expectations. For a show that's lasted over 20 years, it's surprisingly lackluster and dull."
"Oh, I know," Rachel nods wisely. "The first time I saw it I absolutely loved it, but it's so over-commercialized that it's just not that special anymore. Everyone's seen it, so it's really just a tourist trap."
"A tourist trap that's really good at its job," Kurt adds.
They both have to admit that the cast is very good. The chandelier falling was disappointingly anti-climactic, but the costumes are all beautifully made. It kind of evens out to make a solid six on a scale of one to ten. Seven for this particular performance, though they suppose the fact they're seeing a couple understudies has something to do with it.
"I want to see Memphis," Rachel says as they're leaving the theatre. "I haven't seen it yet, and it won the Tony for a reason."
"It's not like we don't have time," Kurt reminds her. "And I want to see a play before I leave."
"That's right," Rachel stops in her tracks. "You're leaving in two days." Her face falls.
"Yeah," Kurt shrugs. "But I'm not going to get all upset over it. I've had two amazing weeks in the best city on earth. Nothing can spoil that."
Rachel still looks like someone has personally offended her. Kurt sighs, links arms with her, and says, "Come on, Miss Pouty, I'm taking you out for ice cream."
------
Rachel doesn't talk much on Thursday. They walk around Central Park and Kurt keeps commenting on the scenery, but Rachel just gives a noncommittal shrug each time he speaks. It's clear that something is wrong, so Kurt sits her down on a bench and asks her, point blank.
"It's no big deal," she turns away from him, looking at her lap.
"Rachel, there are only two things that I can think of that would get you like this. One, Finn dumped you, and if that's the case I'll call him up right now and yell at him. Two, you just bombed an audition that you never told me about. So spill."
Rachel shifts in her seat uncomfortably, looking up at him, cheeks pink.
"It's stupid," she shakes her head. "I talked to my dads last night after they came to get me, and I asked if there was any way you could stay with us for the rest of the month."
Kurt breathes in sharply, shocked that she had thought to ask.
"And they said they'd love to have you, it's just that there's already three of us staying in an apartment that usually only houses one. I mean, Jerry has a cot so we all have beds to sleep on, but they're convinced that a one-bathroom apartment can only house two gay men." Rachel looks at him guiltily, shoulders slumping. "No offense."
"None taken. It's probably true," he admits. He puts an arm around her waist, tugging her closer and leaning in. "Thanks for asking."
"You're welcome," Rachel leans her head on his shoulder. They sit like this for a full five seconds before Kurt pulls away, saying, "Okay, enough. We look like a sickeningly adorable stereotype."
Rachel has no problem talking Kurt's ear off for the rest of the day.
------
Rachel and her dads actually come with Kurt, Burt, and Carole to the airport. Kurt and Rachel link arms - a gesture that comes as a default now - and walk in front of their parents, occasionally looking behind themselves to see how everyone's getting along. Carole is holding a conversation with the taller of Rachel's dads while Burt seems to be getting on extremely well with the small, tiny, and impossibly thin Mr. Berry.
"I'm really going to miss you," Rachel tells him as they reach their gate, pulling his arm closer and hanging on stubbornly.
"Stop acting like I'll never see you again," Kurt rolls his eyes. "You're such a drama queen." He pauses, then admits, "But I'll miss you too."
"Promise me we'll do this again. Even if it's not in New York City, there are plenty of touring shows that come through Ohio." Rachel's whole face lights up as she says this, and Kurt starts nodding eagerly, feeling like a bobble head.
"Definitely," he promises.
"And if you get a boyfriend, we have to go on double dates," Rachel continues. "That way when we take them to see RENT, we'll have someone to cry with when they start making fun of us."
"Speak for yourself, my boy's gonna love RENT," Kurt decides, grinning.
Rachel hugs him and won't let go for a full minute when their plane starts boarding. Her dads say polite goodbyes to Carole and Burt, then tell Kurt he's welcome to come over their place any time once they're all back in Lima. Carole says the same to Rachel, adding, "Even if Finn's not home," and winking.
"See you, Mrs. Taylor," Kurt waves as he heads for the ramp.
"Bye, Mr. Chanler-Berat," Rachel grins, waving.
When the announcement comes that they can turn on their cell phones again, Kurt logs into facebook immediately. He has one notification, which tells him Rachel has tagged him in a post. He clicks on it and sees that Rachel has set her status as: Rachel Berry misses Kurt Hummel.
He copies her, making his status: Kurt Hummel misses Rachel Berry.
"So," he looks up, realizing that both Carole and Burt are staring at him, "what have you been up to for the past week?" Burt points to his carry-on bag, adding, "I saw you stuffing that thing with programs. How many shows did you end up seeing?"
"They're called Playbills, Dad," Kurt pockets his phone, "and we saw eighteen shows."
His dad almost falls out of his seat.
Fandom: Glee
Written: July, 2010
Rating: PG-13
Words: 10100
Summary: Kurt and Rachel are both on vacation in New York City at the same time. Their respective sets of parents aren't too keen on seeing a bunch of musicals, so the duo sets off together and end up spending two weeks together.
------
Kurt is completely furious with Finn.
The two of them had been talking for ages - well, okay, a day - about trying to convince their parents to take them on vacation. They had agreed that their chances were infinitely better if they picked somewhere the entire family could enjoy and if they both suggested it at the same time. Planned dinner conversations were always best.
He had all but written out a script for them that explained just why a trip to Disneyword is a complete necessity for two sixteen year olds, but Carole spoke up before either of them had so much as touched their mashed potatoes.
"Finn, the brochure for football camp came in the mail today. I'm assuming you and Noah are still planning on going again this year?"
"Oh yeah, I forgot all about that!" Finn's face had lit up like a little kid who just got a puppy. "Yeah, I'll have to call him up later and see if his mom's still cool with it."
"Great," Carole grinned. "Burt and I were planning on making those two weeks the official Hudson-Hummel vacation weeks, so you won't mind if the three of us go somewhere while you're gone? Money's going to be a bit tight, what with the wedding coming up."
Kurt had glared at the ring on Carole's finger as if it had personally offended him.
And that was how he got stuck going on vacation with his father and almost-step-mother, which would have been fine if the two of them weren't so sickeningly adorable.
And that is why he's furious with Finn.
"It's just so unfair," he whines, lying across Mercedes' bed while she and Quinn occupy the two beanbags. "We had everything all planned out! I even memorized how much everything would cost. Individually!"
"Kurt, calm down," Mercedes reaches out to take his hand. "So Finn's going to football camp. Big deal. There's no way football camp will cost as much as Disney."
"It doesn't," Quinn adds, speaking to the ceiling. "This football camp is sponsored by the same organization that put together a cheer camp I used to go to. It's actually pretty cheap."
"Your point being?" Kurt asks impatiently, a bite in his voice.
"Meaning that now there's more money for whatever you and your dad and Mrs. Hudson are going to do!"
Kurt looks up, seeing Mercedes' beaming face and raises his eyebrow.
"Yeah, so?"
"So the three of you are probably going somewhere crazy expensive and way classier than Lima," she decides.
"Where are you going?" Quinn asks, still speaking to the ceiling.
"I don't know," Kurt flops his head back down onto the bed. "They haven't decided yet."
"So why are you complaining?" Mercedes starts laughing. "Kurt, hon, you should be attacking your computer right now figuring out vacation ideas. And yeah, your dad's going to be there too, but now you don't have to worry about it being somewhere Finn would like!"
"You should go to Iowa," Quinn tells the ceiling.
"What? Why?"
"If you meet a boy you'll be able to marry him." She says this so matter-of-factly that Kurt can't help but laugh.
"I'm serious!" Quinn looks away from the ceiling and over at the pair of them. "With so few states legalizing gay marriage, the ones that have legalized it must have a higher number of gays living there. It's common sense!"
"So basically, you want me to go to Iowa so I can tell you all about hot boys?"
"Yep!"
------
He ends up not suggesting Iowa.
In fact, he doesn't suggest anywhere. He wants to see what his dad and Carole have in mind for the three of them. He knows from experience just how hard it is to find a daytrip he and his dad will both enjoy, but maybe having Carole there too will help.
And he's certainly not complaining when Carole brings up New York City.
He's denying that the squeal that reverberated around the kitchen had come out of his mouth, though.
"It's a two-week vacation," Burt spreads out a couple papers in front of the three of them, "so I'm thinking we could spread out and do different things in different parts of the city, which might mean changing hotels halfway through. It's a huge place up there."
Kurt bites his tongue and doesn't mention the subway.
"We can go to Ellis Island and see the Statue of Liberty and visit ground zero and there's bound to be a Mets game going on while we're there."
Kurt bites his tongue again and doesn't mention how much he truly abhors stirrup pants.
"And I know the city's famous for its nightlife, but I don't want to stay out too late. Besides, we'll be doing so much during the day we'll be tired out by the time it gets dark!"
Kurt is sure he tastes blood, but he doesn't mention the fact that musicals start at eight.
Burt's pulled out a map now, and is pointing out places he has circled and highlighted. From the looks of it, he's already planned out the entire trip. Kurt immediately finds the Theatre District and his face falls when he realizes there are no little dots or circles there.
"So, what do you think, Kurt?"
"Huh?" Kurt blinks and realizes that his father is pointing at the map, obviously wanting his opinion. He looks closer, noticing that his dad's finger is pointing at the intersection of 51st and Broadway. A familiar logo catches his eye on one of the papers Burt's printed out, and Kurt launches himself at his father, hugging him tightly.
Because his dad's pointing to the location of the Gershwin Theatre, where Wicked is playing.
"Didn't think I'd forget about the Great White Way, did you?" Burt chuckles. "I thought we'd hit the theatre on our first day and start things off with a bang."
------
On the plane ride into the city, Kurt thinks that seeing Wicked would be enough to make the rest of his dad's scheduled two-week visit to New York City bearable. He's not looking forward to seeing every tourist attraction, he's not looking forward to being one of "those people" that stops in the middle of Times Square for a picture, and he's certainly not looking forward to getting up at 5 AM to go stand in line for the Empire State Building.
But he's seeing Wicked three hours after they arrive in the city, so he thinks he can manage.
They're staying at the Marriott Hotel on the 27th floor, which is super exciting. There's a theatre inside the building, too, which Kurt thinks is the coolest thing to ever be inside a hotel, and he's already plotting to sneak off to it and see the show if they really do stick to Burt's schedule and come back in for the night at seven on Tuesday. The elevators are really fun to ride, and their room is big and classy and Burt says that he can keep the souvenir bathrobe.
He had managed to talk his dad into packing a nice pair of slacks and a button-down shirt for the musical, and Carole had asked for his opinion on her dress before packing. The three of them set off for the theatre looking extremely good, he has to admit, and he strutted in front of the pair of them for most of the way.
The theatre is huge and wonderful and beautiful and everything he expected it to be. He stands and admires the mural of the map of Oz for a full minute before Burt pulls him along up the escalators, telling him that an usher was glaring at him for obstructing theatre traffic. They have really good seats, too, and Kurt wonders how his father managed to pull that off. But he's not complaining when the usher shows them into the third row of the mezzanine and he's handed his Playbill.
He buries his face in the Playbill, eyes devouring every inch of it. He holds it with the tips of his fingers, afraid to crinkle it or get fingerprints on it. He scans the cast members' bios and stares at all the headshots for a good three minutes, trying to memorize faces. There is no understudy notice, which means he'll be seeing the three headlined actors in their roles. He's heard incredible things about the two leading ladies.
At two o'clock, the announcement to turn off all cell phones comes. Kurt shuts his off instantly, not wanting to be "that person" that doesn't and then gets a text in the middle of the show. He straightens in his seat, setting the Playbill carefully in his lap and folding his hands expectantly.
By the time intermission rolls around, he is certain of one thing. Antoinette Perry forgive him, but Mandy Gonzalez and Katie Rose Clarke live sound so much better than Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth sounded on the recording. He makes a mental note to look at both their bios again later, then look up everything they've done in the past once he has access to a computer.
Then he looks over at his father and Carole, and his face falls.
"Dad!" He manages not to full-out slap his father, but just barely. Because his father, whose existence he will now be denying, has fallen asleep in a Broadway theatre in the middle of a show.
"Whasgoinon?" Burt mumbles, sitting up straighter. "Is it over?"
"No, Dad, it's intermission. How could you fall asleep during this show?"
"Sorry Kurt," Burt's does look sorry, if Kurt's being honest. "I'm always tired on travel days. And these chairs are really comfy." Kurt makes an exasperated noise and looks over to Carole for help, but the woman is missing.
"She probably went to the bathroom," Burt decides when Kurt wonders aloud where she could have gone. "Don't most women do that?"
"Yeah, they do," Kurt crosses his arms, still upset with his father for sleeping. "Do I even want to ask what part you conked out during?"
"I think it was during that green girl's solo."
"She's had quite a few of those, Dad."
"Oh. Really?"
"You fell asleep back during The Wizard and I?"
"Yes?"
"There's no way I'm related to you." Kurt turns away from his father, arms still crossed. He tugs out his phone, turning it on and deciding to tell the internet what terrible theatre etiquette his father has.
Intermission at Wicked! Mandy and Katie are complete goddesses! (Dad fell asleep.)
He makes this his facebook status, turning his phone back off as Carole returns.
"Are musicals always this loud?" she asks as she sits back down.
"What do you mean?" Kurt is confused.
"I'm starting to get a headache," Carole's voice sounds apologetic. "I don't think I got enough sleep last night, and now all the sounds are making my head hurt."
"Want me to find you some earplugs?" Burt offers.
"Dad," Kurt's smacks himself in the forehead. "They don't sell earplugs at musicals. The whole point of going to a musical is to listen to the music!" He looks over at Carole adding, "Sorry. Are you okay?"
"I just took something for it," she nods, "so I'll probably be fine. The musical is very good. The main actresses certainly are talented."
Kurt bites his tongue and doesn't go into a long-winded speech about how he now worships the pair of them.
The rest of the musical is just as wonderful as the first act. Kurt is sitting on the edge of his seat for most of it, because he's read the novel Wicked and he knows what's going to happen at the end. When the musical throws the novel's ending out the window, Kurt actually cries tears of joy.
He gives the entire cast a standing ovation, getting up out of his seat as soon as the curtain begins to rise for the bows. His father and Carole are clapping politely, but Kurt can tell that Carole still has a headache. He feels a little bit guilty when he gives a cheer when Mandy Gonzalez comes out for her bow, knowing that it probably went straight to Carole's temples.
They leave the theatre and Kurt is buzzing with excitement. He wants to geek out over the show with someone, so he smiles around at the other patrons hopefully, wondering if anyone would stop him and ask him what he thought.
It doesn't work, and before he knows it, his father has guided both him and Carole into some knock-off Italian restaurant, mumbling something about food being good when you have a headache. Despite it being dinnertime, they're seated quickly and are soon sipping glasses of water and perusing the menu that offers over-priced dishes with stupid names.
Kurt pulls out his phone, turning it back on and logging onto facebook again. A little red flag pops up, telling him that someone commented on his status. He figures it's Mercedes or Quinn - or maybe even Finn - asking how his trip is going or something.
Instead, he gets this:
OMG you're in the city too? I saw Wicked last week! Loved it! How long are you here till?
It's from Rachel. Kurt blinks at his phone, not knowing whether to feel worried that she'll hunt him down and make him sing with her in the middle of Times Square or happy that he's found someone to geek over musical theatre with. But then again, it's Rachel, and he's not about to call her up just to hear her talk about how superior she is to everyone who's ever played Elphaba.
He decides that a short reply will do, so he types, Here for two weeks. We should talk about Wicked when we're back home. It's not mean and it's not an invitation to come join him, so he thinks that should do the job.
He barely sets his phone down when another little red flag pops up. It's another message from Rachel.
Want to go see it again? I'm here for the rest of the month!
Now he's not sure whether to be scared of Rachel hunting him down and dragging him back to a theatre and having to listen to her hushed critiques all through the show or just curious as to how Rachel can possibly afford to be in the city for a whole month.
But their waiter arrives to take their orders, so Kurt sets his phone down and decides he'll figure this all out after he has his dinner. He orders a salad that has enough ingredients to warrant a fancy name, but not the price that comes with it, nodding hopefully when the waiter asks them if they'd like a basket of breadsticks with their order. He wants to know if the breadsticks here are better than the ones back at home (and he's certain that they are).
"Did you like the show, Kurt?" his dad asks as the waiter takes their menus and heads back towards the kitchen. Kurt's entire face lights up.
"Absolutely!" he nods. "It was better than I expected! Mandy and Katie are both stunningly gorgeous and they have the most incredible stage presence. Andy and Mandy had wonderful chemistry, too!"
"Who?" Burt asks blankly.
"The green girl, the ditzy blonde, and the love interest," Kurt says, and Burt makes an "Ohhh," noise and nods.
Kurt doesn't want to press his luck so early in the trip, but he figures he might as well ask anyway, so he says hopefully, "What are we doing tonight?"
"Just sightseeing," Burt smiles. "We should head back early so Carole can get her rest."
"Thanks, Burt," Carole smiles at him, laying a hand on his arm. "I think my headache's almost gone, but it would be good to call it an early evening. Sorry, Kurt. You must be disappointed."
"Actually, I was thinking," Kurt straightens in his seat, "since we'll be going back early and there's a theatre in our hotel, do you think I could see the show that's playing there?"
"By yourself?" Burt's brow wrinkles.
"Well, it's in the same building," Kurt points out. "It's not like I'd be wandering around the city at night all alone or anything."
"He has a point," Carole says fairly. "And it would be nice for Kurt to see another show."
Burt isn't going for it, Kurt can tell. He tries not to frown, but he knows his dad is being unreasonable. He'd be inside the building and probably in a crowd full of other tourists doing exactly the same thing: taking advantage of the hotel and the theatre being the same building.
"Please?" Kurt tries not to over-do it with puppy dog eyes, but he can tell he's failing.
"I don't know," Burt seems torn, but that means he'll probably give in sooner or later. "I don't really want you going off by yourself, even if it is in the same building."
"I'll get someone to go with me," Kurt offers, completely forgetting that he doesn't know anyone in the city and can't pull someone out of thin air like he can back home. Burt chuckles.
"Oh really? Who do you know in New York City?" He seems amused, so that's a good sign.
"Rachel!"
Oh fuck.
He hadn't meant to say that. It had come out before he could stop himself, really. He felt his cheeks heat up, Carole and Burt's confused expressions doing nothing to help. He stammers out, "I-I mean, never mind."
"Rachel as in Finn's girlfriend Rachel?" Carole asks, lips turning up into a smile. "Why doesn't it surprise me that she's here?"
"Oh, that Rachel!" Burt catches on. "Yeah, I like this idea. That girl knows how to handle herself. Sure, call her up and see if she'd like to join you. Is she here with her parents?"
"Probably," Kurt shrugs.
"Great," Burt is nodding again. "Yeah, give them a call and see if she and her dads would want to join you." The way he says 'dads' without even second-guessing it really goes to show just how open-minded he's become over the course of a year.
"Right now?" Kurt asks, picking up his phone.
"Yeah, just step outside and stand by the window where I can see you."
Kurt rolls his eyes, but he heads out the door anyway, giving Carole and Burt a small wave through the glass, cheeks turning pink when they wave back. He looks up Rachel's number on his phone, pressing 'call' and half-hoping she wouldn't answer.
She picks up after the first ring.
"Kurt, thank God!" she's practically shouting into her phone. "I was about three seconds away from calling you!"
"Hi, Rachel," Kurt can't keep the skepticism out of his voice or off his face. "How's it going?"
"Oh, you know," he can practically feel her posture straightening. "New York City is New York City. A place where people like you and me can be ourselves without having to worry about lesser minds criticizing us for it. It's wonderful, of course."
"Then why were you three seconds away from calling me?" Kurt can't help but ask.
"Oh, well," Rachel certainly sounds less enthusiastic now, "I've been in the city for a week already, and I love my dads, I really do, but they always want to do the same thing every time we come here."
"You come often, then?"
"Every summer since I was six!" Rachel sounds proud. "My dads have a friend who lives here, and he rents out his place during the summer and holiday seasons. He always blocks out July for us."
"That's fantastic," Kurt can't keep the jealousy out of his voice. "So all this must be old news for you."
"On the contrary, I always find the city to be an exciting place just waiting to be explored. On the rare occasion when my dads deviate from their normal routine, it's quite lovely."
"Your dads like to schedule things too, huh?" Kurt looks through the window at his father. "Mine's got this whole trip planned down to the millisecond."
"And let me guess, it's incredibly irksome because you want to do your own thing and explore and not be a stereotypical tourist who blocks traffic in Times Square and makes all the locals roll their eyes."
"I don't really want to do the Empire State Building either, but yeah."
"Story of my life," Rachel groans. "So, are you calling me in hopes that I'll be your savior?"
"Something along those lines," Kurt admits, knowing it's best to just tell the truth. "Would you, maybe, want to go see musicals with me? It's just that it's not by dad's thing and Carole got a headache during Wicked so I don't think she'll be running back to the next theatre or anything."
"Thank God you asked!" Rachel sighs heavily. "All my dads want to do is see La Cage Aux Folles over and over, and there's only so much glitter this Berry can take." A pause, then, "No offense."
"None taken," Kurt laughs. "To be honest, La Cage isn't exactly on the top of my list."
"Good."
"So do you think your dads will go for it? You seeing musicals with me, I mean. And technically when I say 'musicals' I mean 'the musical playing in the Marriott Hotel.' My dad's so protective that he won't even let me wander around the building without a buddy."
"I'd love to see Come Fly Away!" So Rachel apparently knows where all the musicals were playing. That shouldn't surprise him. "Are you going tonight?"
"I was hoping to, yeah."
"Great. I'll meet you at the box office at seven o'clock. We can work on convincing our respective parents that seeing shows every other night is a complete necessity after tonight's success. Plan?"
"Um, plan," Kurt agrees. He's almost certain that his dad won't go for it, but hey, he's not going to shoot the idea down just yet. "See you tonight."
"See you," Rachel echoes, and hangs up.
------
The following morning, Kurt wakes up and smiles at the signed Come Fly Away Playbill on his bedside table.
Rachel had met him outside the box office as promised and had asked the man at the window for discounted student tickets. By some miracle, they were still available, so the pair of them only paid a fraction of the normal price and ended up with pretty good seats, too. Rachel hadn't made any remarks during the show and had clapped politely during the curtain call. She had wonderful theatre etiquette, and it made Kurt wonder why he had been so worried in the first place.
She had then dragged him out of the theatre as fast as humanly possible, pulling him along impatiently until they'd reached an unmarked door surrounded by metal barriers. Kurt was confused as to what they were doing until he noticed the crowd congregating and how they were all holding out Playbills and posters.
"It's called stagedooring," Rachel had informed him. "If you're lucky, the stars will come out and sign Playbills and whatever else you shove in their faces. It's also a chance to have a quick chat with them if they're not in a hurry."
"You sound experienced," Kurt had remarked, and Rachel had laughed, telling him, "I stagedoored Next to Normal before Alice Ripley had to say no to pictures. Nowadays, that's ancient history. So yes, you could say I'm experienced."
The cast had trickled out slowly, and Kurt was amazed at Rachel's ability to recognize all of them. She mentioned little things each had done during the performance, telling them how much she had enjoyed the show and thanking them for their time. In true Rachel Berry fashion, she had done it all without resorting to adjectives such as "awesome" or "amazing."
She had told him that they were going to see Wicked again and that he was going to meet Mandy Gonzalez and Katie Rose Clarke. It took him about ten seconds to remember how to breathe.
So Kurt is in a very good mood this morning. Rachel had come back to their room after the show so he could prove to Burt that yes, she really does exist here in the flesh, and she had somehow talked him into letting Kurt ditch his schedule and see musicals with her every day for the next two weeks.
Back in Lima, this is called "Rachel Berry overload." In New York City, it's called "Rachel Berry just saved my life and my sanity."
He's still getting used to that aspect of their relationship.
He meets her down in the Starbucks that adjoins the Marriott and they order smoothies and drink them sitting outside the small store, watching countless taxis and pedestrians go by.
"So you've really been coming here since you were six?" Kurt asks, stirring his smoothie to break up the ice.
"Yes," Rachel beams. "Although I've never been here the same time as one of my friends. It makes for a nice change, doing something with someone other than my dads." She looks guilty for a second, then explains. "It's not that I don't love coming here with them, it's just that they still treat me like a little girl. I mean, they let me see more grown-up shows now, but I think sometimes they forget that I'm old enough to make up my own mind about things."
"I get what you're saying," Kurt grimaces.
"They don't understand how I can practically hero-worship Mandy Gonzalez and not consider Douglas Hodge just as praise-worthy," Rachel tells her smoothie, a cross expression on her face. "I'll admit that he did a fantastic job in his role, but there's just something magical about Mandy. It was the same with every other Elphaba I've ever seen. I think it's because I connect so strongly with the role."
"I understand completely," Kurt nods. "There's just something so empowering about watching a woman onstage baring her soul while singing Defying Gravity. Even though it's not you up there, it still feels like you're the one flying."
"Exactly!" Rachel agrees. "Especially when she hits the end note and you just know that this woman knows what she wants and she's out to get it and nobody is going to stop her."
"Right," Kurt's face darkens the tiniest bit, remembering his own fiasco with that high note. Rachel picks up on it.
"I never asked," she looks him in the eye. "Can you really hit a high F or was that just talk?"
"I can hit it," he says confidently, sipping his smoothie and hoping she'll do the same and not press the matter.
"Then why didn't you?"
Yep, still Rachel Berry. Even in New York, she still asks stupid questions.
"It's a long story."
"We have two and a half hours until we have to be somewhere," she tells him, checking her watch.
"Wait, where do we have to be in two and a half hours?" Kurt asks, confused. Last he checked, Sunday matinees started at three o'clock, not twelve thirty.
"We're lotto-ing Wicked," Rachel informs him, nodding and taking a sip of her smoothie, which wordlessly tells him that she thought it had been obvious.
"Lotto?" Kurt is still confused.
"It's this thing some shows do two and a half hours or two hours before the show starts," Rachel's posture straightens. "You put your name in a bucket and they draw names and the winners get to buy cheap tickets! Normally they're front row seats, too. Wicked's lotto is always pretty full, though, so we should probably have a backup when we lose. I heard you can get Chicago rush pretty much any time, so we could go there."
Any doubt in Kurt's mind of Rachel Berry's all-knowingness when it comes to Broadway is wiped away. This girl clearly knows everything there is to know.
She also is incapable of being distracted from something, because she crosses her legs, raises an eyebrow at him, and says, "So? Story. Go."
------
They lose Wicked lotto, as Rachel predicted. There were at least 300 other people there, so neither of them was surprised. They end up seeing Chicago with rush tickets instead, but Kurt's not disappointed. He's seen the movie countless times, but the live show is so much better.
After schmoozing with the cast at the stage door and geeking out over their signed Playbills, Rachel asks, "So, what show would you like to see tonight? We can see Billy Elliot, Fela!, Rock of Ages, In the Heights, Mamma Mia!, or Next to Normal." She pauses, then adds before Kurt can get a word in, "Or we could see Chicago again."
Kurt laughs, saying, "Rachel Berry, I do believe that you are deserving of the title 'Broadway Encyclopedia.' Your fathers would be proud."
"I am the person who told all the unwitting tourists that Rock of Ages is highly inappropriate for children under thirteen," she says proudly. "The man working at the TKTS booth left that part out."
"What do you want to see?" he asks, hoping she doesn't say Mamma Mia! He saw the show when it came through Lima a few years back and hated it.
"Next to Normal," her face is glowing when she says it. "It's my favorite show."
"I thought Wicked was your favorite show," Kurt links arms with her as they start walking back towards Times Square.
"I changed my mind," she grins. "While Wicked is certainly a captivating show that allows the audience to escape into a fantasy land for two and a half hours, Next to Normal shoves the harshness of reality in your face. It makes you really think about your own life and just how fragile the human mind is."
"Sounds terrifying." Kurt admits.
"Oh, it is," Rachel assures him, doing nothing to heighten his desire to see the show. "I've cried all seven times I've seen the show. J. Robert Spencer even recognized me because I had been sobbing in the front row and he gave me a hug at the stage door." Beaming, she adds, "So did Alice Ripley, but that was because I sat outside the theatre for six hours to get rush tickets."
"I think you're insane," Kurt says, as nicely as he can manage.
"I think you know nothing of the word until you've seen Next to Normal," Rachel shoots back.
------
After seeing Next to Normal, Kurt can't decide if he loves Rachel for introducing him to such a masterpiece or if he hates her for making him ride that particular emotional roller coaster. Rachel had handed him a handkerchief before the show started, saying, "You'll need it," and he certainly had.
He's almost certain that he cried for about 40% of the show, spent about 45% of the show shaking in his seat, and the remaining 15% was for stunned silence. It had taken him a full minute to move once intermission had started.
Kurt's also pretty sure that he now has a gigantic crush on Adam Chanler-Berat. When the man comes out of the stagedoor, Kurt literally can't speak. Rachel prods him in the side and holds up her camera, saying that he needs to get a picture with the performer, which makes Kurt's face turn red. When his ability to speak is returned and he manages to have a semi-normal five second conversation with Adam, and get a nice picture with him, Kurt decides that the trip could end right there and he would be completely content.
He and Rachel link arms as they leave the theatre, chatting away at how much they loved the show. When Rachel starts teasing him about his completely obvious crush on Adam, Kurt just laughs and asks her who her Broadway crush is.
"I know you have one," he tells her. "You may be dating Finn, but I just know you still have one." Rachel turns pink.
"It's kind of embarrassing," she admits, speaking quietly and ducking her head so her hair brushes past her face. She mumbles something, but Kurt doesn't catch it. He leads them into the Marriott, saying, "You're going to have to speak up."
"Wesley Taylor." Her cheeks are bright red and she's still looking at the ground.
"Who's that?" he asks.
"He's in the Addams Family," Rachel tells him, looking up from the ground. "He's extremely talented and good-looking and I'm sure his boyfriend would agree."
"Oh," Kurt hadn't expected that. "So that's why it's embarrassing."
"Don't tell anyone," Rachel pleads, tugging on his arm. "It was bad enough when I confessed my undying love for Jonathan Groff on the Guilty Ones and informed the internet that I would marry him one day."
"I have no idea what that means," Kurt says solemnly, "but I won't tell anyone."
"Thank you." Rachel's cheeks are still pink.
"Come on," Kurt leads her over to the elevators. "Pit stop in my room before you call your dads to come get you."
"Okay," Rachel agrees. She smiles, but that soon turns into a smirk when she says, "We can talk about all the hot Broadway boys some more."
------
They see American Idiot on Monday after spending the entire day walking around the Theatre District and taking stupid pictures outside all the theatres. Kurt's favorite is the one of Rachel posing like the girls from Chicago and Rachel's favorite is the one of Kurt pretending to kiss the giant picture of Adam's face outside the Booth.
On Tuesday they see Addams Family and Kurt spends a full two hours talking Rachel into buying a ring pop at Walgreens and using it to propose to Wesley Taylor. She agrees, but only if he does the same with Adam Chanler-Berat when they see Next to Normal again.
She chickens out at the last second and instead babbles something about liking the harmonies in one of his songs. Kurt steals the ring pop and does it for her, getting loud applause from the other theatre patrons and a very gracious refusal from Wesley.
(Both he and Rachel are almost positive that the man who had doubled over laughing at the end of the queue had been Wesley's boyfriend.)
On Wednesday they see Promises, Promises. Both of them act like complete fangirls when Kristin Chenoweth comes out of the stagedoor, cheering for her and proclaiming their undying love. Kurt finds it hard to breathe again. They meet Sean Hayes, too, who surprisingly received a less enthusiastic response from the fans. Rachel and Kurt take it upon themselves to remedy that, counting to three and yelling, "We love you, Sean!" once the cheers died down. He winks at them and Kurt can't breathe… again.
They eat dinner at Ellen's Stardust Diner, dancing in their seats to the music and clapping loudly whenever someone finished a song. They both agree that their favorite waiter was the one who sang Jonas Brothers and then the song "I'm Alive" from Next to Normal. Rachel makes a point of telling him just how much she had enjoyed his rendition when he passed their table.
Hearing "I'm Alive" at the diner makes both of them want to see Next to Normal again, but Rachel informs him that the show is dark on Wednesdays, so they pick In the Heights instead.
"I am completely against stunt casting in all cases," Rachel starts on a tirade, eyes flashing as they head towards the theatre, "and I highly disapprove of their choice to hire an ex-Disney actor to take over the lead role."
"Corbin Bleu?" Kurt's voice is disbelieving when he catches sight of a picture of the High School Musical star.
"Yes," Rachel is breathing heavily. "Not only is High School Musical a complete atrocity that deserves to be collectively erased from the memories of every human being on the planet, but it promoted the careers of talentless individuals, forcing them upon the Broadway community. I can at least be thankful that some of their fans will learn what true musical theatre is as a result."
"So you're basically saying that it's your guilty pleasure movie and you're furious that they didn't cast you?"
Rachel heaves an impressive sigh. "You know me too well."
They break out the ring pop again and this time Rachel's brave enough to get down on one knee. Corbin laughs and calls her "sweetie" and gives her a one-armed hug from behind the barrier before telling her that he's very sorry, but he has to turn her down.
They can feel the collective glares of every teenage girl within the vicinity as they leave the theatre.
------
Having spent four full days together, both Rachel and Kurt feel obligated to spend time with their families on Thursday. They plan to meet up later outside the Booth and see Next to Normal again in the evening.
The Mets game is at its fourth inning when Kurt's phone buzzes. He pulls it out of his pocket eagerly, grinning when he recognizes Rachel's number.
I'm bored out of my brain.
He laughs and texts her back.
Me too. Stirrup pants are awful.
He and Rachel text back and forth for the remainder of the game, deciding that they'll meet up early Friday morning and get some hard-core shopping done. Kurt vows that he will give her an ulterior motive-free makeover this time.
Once the game is over, Kurt drags his dad and Carole off to the Stardust Diner in hopes that Rachel and her dads will show up. They don't, but the waiter who sang "I'm Alive" is working and Kurt 'accidentally' bumps into him on his way to the bathroom, asking him as nonchalantly as possible if he could please sing a song from Next to Normal?
Burt and Carole ask him multiple times throughout the song why he's smirking, but he shushes them both, face flushing when the waiter comes right up to their table and sings in his face. Even though the song is totally not meant to be taken that way, Kurt finds it kind of hot.
(He almost kisses Carole when she tells him she got a picture of it.)
When they leave the restaurant, the waiter bumps into him, grinning and asking how he'd liked the song. Kurt blushes and tells him he sounded fantastic, and the waiter bends in close and whispers in his ear to look out for the casting notice for the Next to Normal tour.
"Congratulations," Kurt says as he leaves the diner, grinning and texting Rachel the second he steps outside.
When they meet up later in the evening, they both take a moment to squeal over the waiter's news. Rachel wants to make him a big fancy card, but Kurt points out that they don't even know his name. They both laugh and sit on the steps outside the Booth, talking and laughing until the theatre opens to patrons.
Kurt doesn't cry as much this time, but he and Rachel both come to the general consensus that Kyle Dean Massey is the creepiest thing on two legs. In the most positive way possible. They spend all of intermission trying to find a way to word that sentiment and not make it sound like an insult.
They stagedoor again and this time Rachel surprises Kurt by stealing the ring pop and proposing to Adam. There are glares similar to the ones she got when she proposed to Corbin, and Kurt's face turns red. Adam politely says no, and when they leave the theatre Rachel tells Kurt that was payback for asking Wesley.
------
Their shopping trip on Friday ends with them both returning to the Marriott and dumping their bags onto the floor, flopping onto the two beds and looking at each other upside-down.
"That was some serious shopping," Rachel says, smiling but sounding tired.
"You are going to look beautiful in your new dress," Kurt tells her, feeling proud of himself for talking Rachel into buying something flattering and not made of argyle. "You should wear it to the theatre later."
"Where am I supposed to change?" Rachel asks, making Kurt laugh.
"Rachel Berry, for a girl who's so smart, you are missing the obvious. We are in a hotel room and we are the only two people in this hotel room. Nobody is going to barge in."
"But… you're in here."
"Oh, Rachel," he sighs. "There's a bathroom if it's that uncomfortable. But honestly, I'm not Finn. I'm not going to," he finger-quotes the next term, "'arrive early' if you so much as unbutton your blouse."
At first Rachel looks affronted, then a little disgusted. It takes her about a minute to loosen up and start laughing.
Poor Finn, Kurt thinks. If only he knew what Rachel and I are talking about now.
They end up talking about more than just Finn. Rachel tells him all about what it was like growing up with two dads and no mom, and Kurt tells her all about the time he had with his mom when he was younger. She opens up and tells him all about Shelby and how it still hurts that Shelby doesn't want her. Kurt tells her all about how his father and Finn act like BFFs and how much it had hurt at first.
The conversation returns to Finn at that point, and Kurt asks Rachel all about their relationship, unabashedly asking if they'd done the nasty yet. Rachel flushes about sixteen shades of pink and tells him no.
"Finn's a gentleman," she says defensively. "He would never force me to do anything I'm not ready for."
"Rachel, I live with him," Kurt reminds her. "He's gotten into the habit of going all super-big-brother on me any time someone so much as blinks in my direction, so trust me, I get it."
"Do you like being his brother?" Rachel asks, obviously remember the disaster that was Kurt's crush on Finn.
"Yes," Kurt answers firmly. "I'll admit that my feelings for Finn used to be something completely different, but now I can safely say that they are a thing of the past." He smirks, adding, "But that won't stop me from telling him to dump you if I think you're wrong for him."
Rachel splutters and starts on a rant about how she and Finn are "made for each other" before she realizes that Kurt had been kidding.
"Now go change into that dress before I bodily force you out of that blouse," Kurt orders, pointing at the bathroom. Rachel giggles, picking up her shopping bag and disappearing into the bathroom for a few minutes. When she comes out, Kurt can't resist wolf-whistling.
"Shut up," Rachel sounds embarrassed.
"You look great," he assures her, stepping around behind her to fix the tie, making the bow as even as possible. "You'll have no trouble finding a taxi with that on."
Rachel slaps his arm lightly, but she lets him take a picture of her with his phone. He says it's because he needs a caller-ID picture for her, but he's totally lying and he uploads it to facebook instead.
It takes all of five seconds for him to get the notification "Noah Puckerman likes your photo."
When he checks his phone later at dinner, he has eight notifications, all for that picture. All of them are from Finn and Puck, arguing about whether Puck is allowed to find Rachel hot if Finn's dating her. Rachel asks what's so funny when he starts laughing, so he shows it to her. She's mad for about two seconds that he tricked her.
They see West Side Story that night, both crying their eyes out at the end of intermission and then later at the end of the show. Both of them have tear trails all over their faces at the stagedoor, and Rachel gets a hug from Josephina Scaglione when she tells the woman just how beautiful her performance was.
They walk back to the Marriott, arguing all the way over who's better, the Sharks or the Jets. Kurt likes the Sharks because he's always loved Anita and he thought George Akram was the most talented dancer on that stage, but Rachel likes the Jets and Kurt is suspicious it's because she's in love with Tony.
------
On Saturday they do the unthinkable. They skip seeing a matinee.
Instead, Kurt drags Rachel into a hair salon, telling the girl that she is not leaving this building until she has a new haircut. While he admits that her hair is nice, he can't deny that he's wanted to see her with short hair since the sixth grade.
"And straight," he emphasizes. "No waves or curls, just straight. You could totally pull it off."
At first Rachel looks as if she wants to bite his head off (or shave his head, he can't tell). But after he picks up one of the magazines in the waiting room and shows her a plethora of pictures of young actresses and models with short hair, she warms up to the idea.
One of the hairdressers comes over to them and asks if they need help. Kurt points at one of the pictures, asking her if she could make Rachel's hair look like that. The woman touches Rachel's hair gently, spinning a lock between her fingers, then jokes, "And here I thought you two would be hard to please."
Rachel makes Kurt hold her hand when they start cutting. Kurt rolls his eyes and his cheeks turn pink, but he obliges.
"It's just hair," he argues as Rachel's fingers squeeze his together painfully. "It'll grow back."
"I haven't had a haircut since I was thirteen," Rachel admits, squeezing her eyes shut. "I'm terrified that something horrible will happen and then I'll look nothing like my headshot."
"That's what ponytails are for," Kurt says exasperatedly. "Pull your hair back in the headshot; pull your hair back for the audition. Simple. It's not like you're having plastic surgery or something."
Despite Kurt's help, Rachel still keeps her eyes shut the entire time. She finally opens them after her hair has been blow-dried and brushed and the hairdresser told her she had finished.
"It's so soft," Rachel says, taking a step closer to the mirror and running her fingers through her now short locks. "And it has layers."
Kurt winks at the hairdresser. That hadn't been the original plan at all.
"I love it!" Rachel turns around and catches Kurt in a hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for taking me here!"
"What can I say?" Kurt sighs impressively. "I know what looks good on my girls."
Rachel starts crying.
"What's wrong?" Kurt asks.
"No, nothing's wrong," Rachel sniffs. "It's just that you called me one of your girls. Nobody's ever called me one of the girls before."
"Oh, Rachel," Kurt links arms with her while discreetly handing his credit card to the hairdresser with the other hand, "you lovely, bat-shit crazy girl, you. Of course you're one of my girls."
------
Finn calls Kurt on Sunday morning, catching him right as he and Rachel sit down for breakfast.
"Hello absentee brother," Kurt says, grinning at Rachel when she straightens in her seat, knowing who's on the other end.
"Hey Kurt," Finn answers. "I've got a question for you."
"Okay," Kurt is confused. What could possibly be so important that Finn actually made the effort to make a phone call?
"Is Puck allowed to think Rachel's hot if I'm dating her?"
Kurt bursts out laughing, completely taken aback that he and Puck are still on about that. He decides to fuel the fire instead of telling Finn that Puck thinks that everything with breasts is hot and to not worry about it.
"Well, I certainly hope so, because she's sitting across from me right now and I must admit that she is looking quite stunning today. If I weren't a man's man, I'd be all over that. In fact…" And he hangs up.
Rachel's phone rings not five seconds later. She answers it, eyes widening before she finally says, "Finn, calm down and speak slowly. I think I caught two words of that."
When she hangs up, Kurt looks up from his muffin and asks, "So?"
"He called to warn me that you like girls now and that I should keep my rape whistle handy."
"Oh Finn," Kurt shakes his head, pulling out his phone again and texting his brother.
It was a joke. Ha ha.
"So I was thinking we could hit up Off-Broadway today," Rachel says as she sips her coffee. "Avenue Q and the Fantastiks?"
"So we'll basically be going from Sesame Street makes a porno to classic, tasteful musical theatre?"
"Basically."
Later that night, the both confess to having enjoyed Avenue Q more.
------
They finally win Wicked lotto for the Wednesday matinee. He and Rachel both nearly have a spaz attack when Kurt's name is called, and he takes his place in line smiling broadly, striking up a conversation with the person in front of him.
Even though it clashes with his outfit, Kurt decides to wear the button he gets that says, "I won the Wicked lotto!"
When they return to the theatre for the show, they're stopped by an older couple who ask Rachel if she'll take a picture for them. Rachel does, then asks if the couple will take a picture of her and Kurt. The two of them take one picture just standing next to each other and smiling then one posing like Elphaba and Glinda. Kurt decides to be nice and poses as Glinda, since he's already on Rachel's left.
This time Kurt doesn't have to wake someone up during intermission. He and Rachel just turn and gape at each other as soon as the curtain goes down, eyes wide and excitement all over their faces. They run around the theatre, stopping at the souvenir booth and debating whether or not to buy something before realizing that they can get it all cheaper online anyway.
They hold hands during the second act, even though they both know what's coming.
They're still holding hands when they leave the theatre. Rachel pulls Kurt over to the stage door, and they both wait impatiently for the cast to come out. Kurt babbles on about how much he loves Mandy and Katie while Rachel tugs on his arm whenever someone comes out.
Kurt regrets getting rid of the ring pop when the two leading ladies come out.
But he smiles and tells them how much he enjoyed the show and how talented he thinks they are, watching as they sign his Playbill and then posing for a picture with them. He swaps places with Rachel and takes her picture too. They wait until Mandy and Katie have both left before squealing.
They both agree that the only way to top this would be to see Next to Normal again, but since the show's dark on Wednesdays, they decide to go see Phantom of the Opera instead. They've both seen the movie too many times to actually care about the stage show.
"I feel bad admitting it," Kurt whispers to Rachel during intermission, "but it's not really living up to its expectations. For a show that's lasted over 20 years, it's surprisingly lackluster and dull."
"Oh, I know," Rachel nods wisely. "The first time I saw it I absolutely loved it, but it's so over-commercialized that it's just not that special anymore. Everyone's seen it, so it's really just a tourist trap."
"A tourist trap that's really good at its job," Kurt adds.
They both have to admit that the cast is very good. The chandelier falling was disappointingly anti-climactic, but the costumes are all beautifully made. It kind of evens out to make a solid six on a scale of one to ten. Seven for this particular performance, though they suppose the fact they're seeing a couple understudies has something to do with it.
"I want to see Memphis," Rachel says as they're leaving the theatre. "I haven't seen it yet, and it won the Tony for a reason."
"It's not like we don't have time," Kurt reminds her. "And I want to see a play before I leave."
"That's right," Rachel stops in her tracks. "You're leaving in two days." Her face falls.
"Yeah," Kurt shrugs. "But I'm not going to get all upset over it. I've had two amazing weeks in the best city on earth. Nothing can spoil that."
Rachel still looks like someone has personally offended her. Kurt sighs, links arms with her, and says, "Come on, Miss Pouty, I'm taking you out for ice cream."
------
Rachel doesn't talk much on Thursday. They walk around Central Park and Kurt keeps commenting on the scenery, but Rachel just gives a noncommittal shrug each time he speaks. It's clear that something is wrong, so Kurt sits her down on a bench and asks her, point blank.
"It's no big deal," she turns away from him, looking at her lap.
"Rachel, there are only two things that I can think of that would get you like this. One, Finn dumped you, and if that's the case I'll call him up right now and yell at him. Two, you just bombed an audition that you never told me about. So spill."
Rachel shifts in her seat uncomfortably, looking up at him, cheeks pink.
"It's stupid," she shakes her head. "I talked to my dads last night after they came to get me, and I asked if there was any way you could stay with us for the rest of the month."
Kurt breathes in sharply, shocked that she had thought to ask.
"And they said they'd love to have you, it's just that there's already three of us staying in an apartment that usually only houses one. I mean, Jerry has a cot so we all have beds to sleep on, but they're convinced that a one-bathroom apartment can only house two gay men." Rachel looks at him guiltily, shoulders slumping. "No offense."
"None taken. It's probably true," he admits. He puts an arm around her waist, tugging her closer and leaning in. "Thanks for asking."
"You're welcome," Rachel leans her head on his shoulder. They sit like this for a full five seconds before Kurt pulls away, saying, "Okay, enough. We look like a sickeningly adorable stereotype."
Rachel has no problem talking Kurt's ear off for the rest of the day.
------
Rachel and her dads actually come with Kurt, Burt, and Carole to the airport. Kurt and Rachel link arms - a gesture that comes as a default now - and walk in front of their parents, occasionally looking behind themselves to see how everyone's getting along. Carole is holding a conversation with the taller of Rachel's dads while Burt seems to be getting on extremely well with the small, tiny, and impossibly thin Mr. Berry.
"I'm really going to miss you," Rachel tells him as they reach their gate, pulling his arm closer and hanging on stubbornly.
"Stop acting like I'll never see you again," Kurt rolls his eyes. "You're such a drama queen." He pauses, then admits, "But I'll miss you too."
"Promise me we'll do this again. Even if it's not in New York City, there are plenty of touring shows that come through Ohio." Rachel's whole face lights up as she says this, and Kurt starts nodding eagerly, feeling like a bobble head.
"Definitely," he promises.
"And if you get a boyfriend, we have to go on double dates," Rachel continues. "That way when we take them to see RENT, we'll have someone to cry with when they start making fun of us."
"Speak for yourself, my boy's gonna love RENT," Kurt decides, grinning.
Rachel hugs him and won't let go for a full minute when their plane starts boarding. Her dads say polite goodbyes to Carole and Burt, then tell Kurt he's welcome to come over their place any time once they're all back in Lima. Carole says the same to Rachel, adding, "Even if Finn's not home," and winking.
"See you, Mrs. Taylor," Kurt waves as he heads for the ramp.
"Bye, Mr. Chanler-Berat," Rachel grins, waving.
When the announcement comes that they can turn on their cell phones again, Kurt logs into facebook immediately. He has one notification, which tells him Rachel has tagged him in a post. He clicks on it and sees that Rachel has set her status as: Rachel Berry misses Kurt Hummel.
He copies her, making his status: Kurt Hummel misses Rachel Berry.
"So," he looks up, realizing that both Carole and Burt are staring at him, "what have you been up to for the past week?" Burt points to his carry-on bag, adding, "I saw you stuffing that thing with programs. How many shows did you end up seeing?"
"They're called Playbills, Dad," Kurt pockets his phone, "and we saw eighteen shows."
His dad almost falls out of his seat.