I think it is brilliant and brave of you to post this. And I'm very glad you are reclaiming what is yours.
I think another hard part of recovering from any sort of sexual abuse, particularly if you are a stompy, independent-minded grrrrl of any stripe is, you have to admit to a certain amount of helplessness, either emotional or physical in the situation. And that, for me, was the hardest part. Admitting that I had got myself into a situation I couldn't fight my way out of, while at the same time NOT crucifying myself with guilt over how could I have been so stupid to get into that situation in the first place.
I've been facing some of that demon, and I'm half way through writing about it. This has a lot do with some resistance play I engaged in recently.
We'll have to go shopping together soon
I apparently can't not pass Toys right now :) I went to the furniture store nearby the other day and as I was walking home, tripped into the store and bought myself a submergible, though I'm not as in love with it as my goofy little California what's-it glow-in-the-dark egg. I think it'll always be my first love and defended ravenously ;)
Unfortunately they don't sell my favorite anymore, or I'd recommend it. I asked them about and they said they couldn't find them anymore and were bummed because they really loved it too.
"you have to admit to a certain amount of helplessness..."
I had a difficult time with this hurdle, myself. I pretended to myself that it was consensual for a long time, because then I didn't have to face my apalling (to me) lack of spine.
Comments 6
I think another hard part of recovering from any sort of sexual abuse, particularly if you are a stompy, independent-minded grrrrl of any stripe is, you have to admit to a certain amount of helplessness, either emotional or physical in the situation. And that, for me, was the hardest part. Admitting that I had got myself into a situation I couldn't fight my way out of, while at the same time NOT crucifying myself with guilt over how could I have been so stupid to get into that situation in the first place.
We'll have to go shopping together soon. ;)
Reply
I've been facing some of that demon, and I'm half way through writing about it. This has a lot do with some resistance play I engaged in recently.
We'll have to go shopping together soon
I apparently can't not pass Toys right now :) I went to the furniture store nearby the other day and as I was walking home, tripped into the store and bought myself a submergible, though I'm not as in love with it as my goofy little California what's-it glow-in-the-dark egg. I think it'll always be my first love and defended ravenously ;)
Reply
Reply
I had a difficult time with this hurdle, myself. I pretended to myself that it was consensual for a long time, because then I didn't have to face my apalling (to me) lack of spine.
Reply
(The comment has been removed)
Reply
Leave a comment