Doing something outlandish seems to work, or just something that they'll have no response to. I remember being harassed by this guy in high school who would come over to bother me at lunch, talking about how his friend wanted to date me and stupid crap like that. I told him that I would go out with his friend if he made out with a guy for ten minutes and I got to watch. The guy harassing me stared at me for a few seconds, got up, tripped while walking away, and never bothered me again.
My theory is that bullies like to feel they can outwit or out-retort you, so saying or doing something shocking seems to scare them off. It was a joke, but I remember someone saying that if someone harasses you, you should take a shit on their front porch, because what are they going to do, take a shit on your porch in return?
I think everything except ignoring the bullies is a valid tactic. Countering them with words never worked for me, but there may be wittier people out there who know exactly the right words. Once or twice I countered them by fighting back, for lack of a better word. (More like shoving than punching, but it worked.)
Education and adult intervention is absolutely crucial, and those are the ones still most sorely lacking. Bullies should be reprimanded for their actions, education should be a preventative measure. Ignoring the bullies never does anything (except when it comes to internet trolls, perhaps).
Ignoring the bullies never does anything (except when it comes to internet trolls, perhaps). In my experience dealing with internet trolls, it has. For a while, they may try to change their names or get access through some other way, but eventually...the more they get ignored and have no one engage with them, the more they will eventually give up and go away.
IMO, tis ironic how ignoring helps cyber bullies and not irl bullies. But, on the other hand, cyber bullies feed off of different things than irl bullies do (like they feel like they can get away with it more because they can hide behind an anon identity)
That is another good idea too, and it would be great too if they enforced that since some schools/teachers claim that it isn't tolerated yet they don't do shit about it when it happens.
Sometimes these teachers realize that the problem comes from the *parents*. Other kinds of intervention are needed here. It is. While it had happened in 2009 and I mentioned the story recently on here, the boy that had attacked my former neighbor's daughter at school had parents that thought that it wasn't their kid's fault that he attacked my f. neighbor's daughter, but the daughter's fault for making him attack her (yeah, she wasn't the one that attacked him). These parents of this lad think other people's kids are the problems rather than their kids. Of course, it doesn't help that both of these people have a superiority complex where they think they are above everyone else.
Other than dealing with this kind of mentalities, you got some parents that are so god damn lazy that they rely on the school to parent their children and then they get all pissy when their kids get in trouble with the school or the law.
I think it's individual to the bully and the situation, sometimes ignoring them is the worst thing you can do, the last three times I tried it, it gave the bullies time to run around and turn people against me, since they talked and I didn't, everyone took their version as the truth.
Sometimes beating them up scares them off, sometimes it just gets you in trouble.
I think the most effective tactic is having people in charge who will do something about bullies.
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My theory is that bullies like to feel they can outwit or out-retort you, so saying or doing something shocking seems to scare them off. It was a joke, but I remember someone saying that if someone harasses you, you should take a shit on their front porch, because what are they going to do, take a shit on your porch in return?
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Education and adult intervention is absolutely crucial, and those are the ones still most sorely lacking. Bullies should be reprimanded for their actions, education should be a preventative measure. Ignoring the bullies never does anything (except when it comes to internet trolls, perhaps).
Reply
In my experience dealing with internet trolls, it has. For a while, they may try to change their names or get access through some other way, but eventually...the more they get ignored and have no one engage with them, the more they will eventually give up and go away.
IMO, tis ironic how ignoring helps cyber bullies and not irl bullies. But, on the other hand, cyber bullies feed off of different things than irl bullies do (like they feel like they can get away with it more because they can hide behind an anon identity)
Reply
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Sometimes these teachers realize that the problem comes from the *parents*. Other kinds of intervention are needed here.
Reply
It is. While it had happened in 2009 and I mentioned the story recently on here, the boy that had attacked my former neighbor's daughter at school had parents that thought that it wasn't their kid's fault that he attacked my f. neighbor's daughter, but the daughter's fault for making him attack her (yeah, she wasn't the one that attacked him). These parents of this lad think other people's kids are the problems rather than their kids. Of course, it doesn't help that both of these people have a superiority complex where they think they are above everyone else.
Other than dealing with this kind of mentalities, you got some parents that are so god damn lazy that they rely on the school to parent their children and then they get all pissy when their kids get in trouble with the school or the law.
Reply
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Sometimes beating them up scares them off, sometimes it just gets you in trouble.
I think the most effective tactic is having people in charge who will do something about bullies.
Reply
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